Very discouraged and somewhat motivated

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OKmac3
OKmac3 Posts: 192 Member
in Motivation and Support
I join MFP a few months ago with the idea to use it as a guide to lose weight. I started out great, was consistent in tracking calories and increasing my exercise to where I started losing weight and noticing big changes in my physical appearance. I then for a couple weeks I didn't see any changes and gained the weight back (probably have gained a few pounds on top of what I started with).

I want and need to lose the weight badly (guess not bad enough if I am here complaining about this), but I find all the excuses for not doing what I need to do....too hot out, my kids are in town, it doesn't work for me, etc etc.... I am almost to the breaking point of losing my mind because I do not like the way I look, or how some kids ask much longer til the baby comes out (yes I am a male and NO I am not pregnant), or the fact I am afraid to use my health insurance to get a physical because I am afraid of the results (I did not have health insurance for ten years and I finally have a job with paid insurance).

I am so sick of my life and the path I am going down. I almost feel like a lost cause and will just be overweight from now on. I am done complaining (want to use another word but wont) for now.

Replies

  • louiseyanne
    louiseyanne Posts: 36
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    You can do this!
    You've got a massive MFP family here to help you along the way.
    x
  • hypotrochoid
    hypotrochoid Posts: 842 Member
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    Stop. Breathe, then start again. Remember, our greatest glory is not in never falling, but rising every time we fall. *hugs*
  • TrishJimenez
    TrishJimenez Posts: 561 Member
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    Maybe going and getting the physical will be the motivation that you need. Sometimes it has to be more then caring about how you look to find the motivation. Me for instance it isnt just my clothes fitting it is about my back not hurting, having more energy, and not being so depressed. If the dr tells you that you need to do certain things for your health it might help you. And I bet he could give you some good tips. Maybe if you make your mantra that you are doing this so you can be with your kids for years and years to come then you wont mind so much that they are in town. Include them :)
  • runnermel
    runnermel Posts: 278
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    you can do this!! remember.....Excuses are only good for those that make them!!! now get up off your butt and get with it!!
  • spaingirl2011
    spaingirl2011 Posts: 763 Member
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    As another poster pointed out, we are all here to encourage you to make good food choices, exercise, etc. We want to help you any way we can, but you have to want it. We're here for you!
  • gsnap30
    gsnap30 Posts: 67
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    Don't Give UP!!!!!! YOU can do this. It may suck right now for you but remember WHY you want to lose weight. If you have a workout buddy it may be easier for you to workout. You can always log on to here and have someone to talk to. PLease hang in there!!!!!
  • maureendonahue
    maureendonahue Posts: 468 Member
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    You can do this! Start small. Like commit to drinking 8 glasses of water per day, and that's it. Then stick to it. After a week, maybe add in 20 minutes of walking. Or just that you are going to honestly track your eating every day. Baby steps. Making major changes in your lifestyle all at once is really difficult!

    Slow but steady improvement will let the weight come off!

    Good luck!
  • DAVEGETSLEAN
    DAVEGETSLEAN Posts: 59 Member
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    Hang in there. You should get that physical; the results may motivate you to do more. It's easy to get discouraged, especially when your working hard and not losing. Just keep at it. I find that when I exercise when I don't want to I feel the best. It's ok to backslide, don't quit trying.
  • edward1973
    edward1973 Posts: 67
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    hang in there you can always vent here on the forums, just take small steps and take it one day at a time
  • sleepygiraffes
    sleepygiraffes Posts: 35 Member
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    The one thing that's keeping me motivated is my mother, to be honest. I gained a few pounds after starting a certain medication, and it didn't help that my fiance is a stick and eats whatever he wants, causing me to begin having the same eating habits as him. I started cooking healthier meals for him and he loved them... but after losing only 6lbs, I'm getting compliments from my mom or my family saying "Hey, you've lost weight here.. it's totally obvious" Or, "Hey you look so much skinner.. your hips were starting to get too wide". Things like that really made me realize that people noticed when I gained weight, and when I lost it. I'm losing weight to feel good and because even though I'm still young, I want to live a long healthy life.
  • wickedcricket
    wickedcricket Posts: 1,246 Member
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    well .. here's one idea - make an appointment with yourself - start like 3 times a week - WRITE IT ON YOUR CALENDAR and keep it just like a dr appointment. Even if you don't DO anything or only make a half hearted attempt, it's a start!
    DON'T make excuses - don't skip appointments
    as far as meals/calories go - perhaps try this? http://www.400caloriefix.com/uof/400caloriefix/

    these are EASY meals around 400 calories each - some even fast food
    We can do this! read the message boards for inspiration

    best wishes ~
  • dakoerber
    dakoerber Posts: 308 Member
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    Most of us have a hard time with diet and exercise. If it was easy there would be no obesity issues.

    First you need to start being kinder with yourself. I don't know how long you have been heavy but I am sure it took you time to put the weight on. It will take you time to take it off. Plus we are talking about a lifestyle change. This is not just about eating right for a few weeks. You have to make changes that will be permanant. This will be a struggle but the most important thing is that you remember you are worth it and no matter what to keep trying!

    Maybe you do need to go to the Dr's so that you can get real with your situation - whatever it may be - and that might be just the motivation for you to realize you HAVE to make changes. Don't quit trying!!!!! You can do this!
  • ShannaB83185
    ShannaB83185 Posts: 441 Member
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    "Never give up on a dream just because of the length of time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway."

    QUITTING IS NOT AN OPTION!! You can do it!! Like everyone else said take baby steps, brush yourself off and get moving! We are here to help! YOU GOT THIS!!
  • SunshineKisses_2012
    SunshineKisses_2012 Posts: 471 Member
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    Maybe going and getting the physical will be the motivation that you need. Sometimes it has to be more then caring about how you look to find the motivation. Me for instance it isnt just my clothes fitting it is about my back not hurting, having more energy, and not being so depressed. If the dr tells you that you need to do certain things for your health it might help you. And I bet he could give you some good tips. Maybe if you make your mantra that you are doing this so you can be with your kids for years and years to come then you wont mind so much that they are in town. Include them :)

    ^^^ That. I am using this site not just for weight loss for how I look, but because I know that I FEEL better when I don't have weight on. I have recently hit my 30's and decided I want to do a tri-athalon. Now, if I were to tell my immediate family that, they'd laugh at me. I have about 100 lbs to lose before I would consider it because I don't want to end up having a heart attack in the middle of the race, but it's a goal, it's obtainable, and it's going to blow my family's MINDS!

    On top of that, because of the weight, I have starting having joint issues. That is NOT a good sign at 31!!! I'm better than this and I know I can do it. I know it is going to be the hardest thing I have ever had to do, but it will be worth every last drop of sweat and ounce of tears. We are all here for you. Add us as friends and we will DEFINITELY keep you motivated, even when you hit a plateau. YOU CAN DO THIS!
  • aset132
    aset132 Posts: 91
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    It takes time. You will have good weeks and bad weeks. Just don't give up. There is a lot of support here and we are all here for you! Don't give up, just start with the next meal and the next workout. It takes time and then eventually something clicks and you love it. I do suggest going to the Doctor for that physical. I know it's scary but nothing motivates like not so great blood work. It definitely kicked me into gear! Best of luck! You can do this!!!
  • mermx
    mermx Posts: 976
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    OK So you have done it once, albeit for a short time and noticed big changes...how long did it take to get bigger the first time? Not a few months..so you know it is going to take time. I think we would all like to see major results in a short time, but we all have to be realistic. If we lost mega pounds in a few short months then we would gain it back quicker and more besides if we went back to our old lives. So take it easy, it is going to be a whole new way of life not an overnight fix :-)

    Excuses? Yeah we all have them! We would all be super fit and slim if we didn`t have all the excuses. Don`t be so hard on yourself, we all have good days and bad days. OK you make an excuse one day and you know what you have done, so make a decision that the next day you won`t make an excuse.

    If you feel that you want to go for a physical then go for it! If they tell you that you are overweight but perfectly fit to change your diet then what?

    Listen hun, only you can make the changes. don`t give up, you will get to where you want to be...don`t put so much pressure on yourself. Keep tracking your food, go for short walks to start. Try to get your head in a better place, talk to friends and family about how you feel...never be afraid to ask for support from those around you :-) MFP is a great source but not as good as people who know you...talk to them you may be suprised.

    Good luck and hang in there,,you can do it x
  • OKmac3
    OKmac3 Posts: 192 Member
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    Thank you everyone. Over the weekend I got some pretty scary news, my dad had surgery to remove the prostate cancer and afterwards he ended up paralyzed from the waist down and his kidney is shutting down. He had already had a kidney transplant about 10 years ago. I know he is scared and pissed (he even took a swing at both doctors and about knocked them out after what he feels like they lied to him as to what would happen). I am definetly going to go for a long walk tonight to help ease my mind. That is my goal for today.
  • mermx
    mermx Posts: 976
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    That is really bad news, my thoughts are with you and your family today x

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