Crying when exercising (emotion not pain)?

I didn't know where to post this...

So, I lost weight a couple of years ago - combination of diet and Shaun T. I felt motivated and strong. I worked for the goal and the process made me stronger.

The past year, I've had a horrible time at work since a new manager arrived and I have been bullied. Nothing I've done was good enough (and when I produced the proof that it was good enough, my manager lied to prove me wrong). I turned back to food. My self esteem hit rock bottom, I've been made to feel worthless and I've lost self confidence and self worth. I've put on 25kg in a year. I have now left my job feeling a failure and am doing some minor work to tide me over.

I need to lose weight again. I've done this to myself, but my weight is adding to my issues. I have a small frame and on me 25kg is massive.

I've tried working out, but instead of feeling empowered, I can't get through a workout because I end up sobbing. Like all the feelings of self hate and worthlessness come out when I exercise.

Has anyone else experienced this and is there anything I can do about it?

Replies

  • Storm985
    Storm985 Posts: 44 Member
    Thank you.

    At the moment I can't afford counselling due to my lack of decent job :/ . I have thought about it.

    I've never lost weight without exercising. Food has always been my go to (if it was easy to stop this, I'd be stick thin). Exercise normally suppresses my apetite and boosts my mood so I don't want to eat. I don't know what to do. I know the diet starts in the kitchen, but exercise helps with the slip ups!
  • Storm985
    Storm985 Posts: 44 Member
    Thank you for your points. Something to think about.
  • cougargirl1025
    cougargirl1025 Posts: 80 Member
    How about an activity that is sneaky about the fact that it's exercise? I.E. dancing, biking, ping pong, WII (better than nothing). Perhaps if it's fun, you wont focus so much on the fact it's exercising?
  • CoueCoue
    CoueCoue Posts: 69 Member
    edited August 2017
    I urge you to keep on with the exercise. I have cried after a workout in the early days...especially when I fell short of my own expectations (I actually hid in the toilet, I was so ashamed at how pathetic I felt), but you know what....you get better. And the pride you get from sticking to something and seeing yourself improve is enormous (and improvement in fitness is usually really gratifying because it tends to happen fast!)

    Exercise for me used to be like drinking too much red wine - it heightened whichever mood I had when I went in with!

    However, these days, exercise almost always brightens my mood. I'm now a "happy drunk" so to speak!

    Don't be scared of your emotions. Embrace them and use them. All strength to you!
  • laurabadams
    laurabadams Posts: 201 Member
    When I was losing weight last year I focused almost exclusively on my food, at first. I felt it would be easier to incorporate exercise later, after losing some weight & establishing some decent eating habits. The thought of taking on so many changes overwhelmed me.

    I started with just an occasional walk outside or on a treadmill. Once I lost about 30-40 pounds, I began doing about 3-4 different body weight exercises at home a few nights a week (plank, push ups, squats, dips...that kind of stuff). Also, I started dancing in my bathroom, lol. Like, really letting loose to music that motivates me. It was completely out of character for me, but I loved my 30 minute free-form cardio-dance sessions. Although I may be applying the term "dance" rather liberally, lol ;)

    I'm not sure what you're currently doing, but exercise doesn't need to be organized or some prescribed set of anything right now for you. Just do your best, be kind to yourself & find something that makes you feel good. Set small goals & build up your confidence.

    I'm sorry you're hurting right now. It's hard to see the potential of better days when we're hurting. But they're there. Hang in there. ❤️
  • WJS_jeepster
    WJS_jeepster Posts: 224 Member
    I'm so sorry to hear about the crap you're going through. When I had a lot of stuff going on, I went to this yoga/pilates class often. I would lay in the back of the room at the end of class when we were cooling down and just sob. We were laying on our backs so my ears would fill with tears. I have also on occasion sobbed my way through a run. So I totally empathize with you. I don't have any really good advice, other than maybe you need to get those feelings out and the exercise is really helping in a way?
  • Kintsugi_Haikyo
    Kintsugi_Haikyo Posts: 361 Member
    I just switched jobs at my work. I had a manager like yours, now I don't. I'm finally making progress losing weight. I wonder if depression/stress can make you not lose weight?

    Either way, hold on. This job isn't gonna last 4/ever. Just know you are not alone and you will get through it.
  • Andy10725
    Andy10725 Posts: 68 Member
    Just need to keep going. I felt bad as well when I restarted exercising. Things I could do back then felt almost impossible. The reality check was very unbearable but there is nothing special that needed to be done. Just need to keep the head up and keep going.
  • shroodle88
    shroodle88 Posts: 123 Member
    I hear you! Or body is the place where we hold all our emotional tension. So crying at the workout might be a form of much needed relief - better to cry it all out than holding it in and stifling the pain with cake and fries. You're brave to get back to the gym (or whatever you're doing in your workout) - be gentle and persistent - everyone here is rooting for you :-) good luck!
  • rsamuelsgold
    rsamuelsgold Posts: 391 Member
    Super duper hugs. Maybe talking to a trusted and wise friend could help. Reading books or are helpful too in the interim.

    Cassie Ho (blogilates.com) helped. And Abi Stumvol (she's on YouTube and Instagram).

    When I started to workout I cried through most sessions to. The fact that I was exercising was emotional. I kept at it. Worked out through the tears and one day after a session I laid on my mat and hugged my body.

    Now it's not as bad. I'm learning to be kind to me.