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RandJ6280
RandJ6280 Posts: 1,162 Member
in Motivation and Support
I was at the beach this past weekend, and I made an observation. Some people are "comfortable" in their skin... maybe some shouldn't be.
I personally feel embarrassed in my swimsuit as I'm not happy with the way I look. Some people at the beach, in my opinion should cover up a bit more.
I have also noticed that at home... I'm dressing in baggy clothes... again, because I'm not happy with the way I look.

UNTIL NOW!!! I have noticed that when I dress like I have been... my mental attitude is down... self image is down... My mind is turning around to the positive side. I'm dressing better (still not happy, but I'm moving in the right direction) and my mindset is improving. Looking forward to dropping a belt size... to wearing a small size jean...

Those of you out there trying to lose weight... how are you dressing? In old baggy clothes? Or dressing to impress?

Positive mindset = positive results.
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Replies

  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,710 Member
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    The only person I "dress to impress" is myself. I wear what looks good for my body shape, what's appropriate for the situation and what makes ME feel good.

    Questioning the confidence of others isn't a good thing, if you ask me. Saying some people should cover up at the beach is your opinion, but it's probably not going to be received well.

    But, good for you for working on your OWN self-confidence. That's all you can do. Focus on improving your health.
  • NadNight
    NadNight Posts: 794 Member
    edited August 2017
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    I dress in what I'm comfortable in, admittedly I'm pretty comfortable on the beach in a bikini and shorts. I do notice other people but whilst I can't deny I see how slim or not they are I notice more how some look very uncomfortable and cover up vs those who don't really care and just have a good time. I think the reason I feel more comfortable at the beach is because so many people do feel self conscious and uncomfortable and it just reminds me that we're all human and no one is perfect- even that person with the perfect 'bikini body' probably has things about their body they want to change. So most people aren't really focusing on or caring about your body hangups, you're just another person on the beach. Above all what I notice is beautiful on the beach are the people walking around or playing games with confidence and smiles, and as cheesy as it sounds they're the ones that look best
  • I_am_the_Cosmos
    I_am_the_Cosmos Posts: 69 Member
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    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld wrote: »
    Wow, how awful of you sitting there judging them.

    They can wear what ever they like.

    I don't judge them, but leave that to my wife and her friends who are usually pretty brutal. I agree with you that they can wear what they like, but I do feel sometimes they maybe shouldn't. Then again, I'm an old man in my 40's and I understand that the 'culture' of body imagery has changed a great deal from when I was younger.
  • cenafan
    cenafan Posts: 398 Member
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    I_am_the_Cosmos wrote: »
    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld wrote: »
    Wow, how awful of you sitting there judging them.

    They can wear what ever they like.

    I don't judge them, but leave that to my wife and her friends who are usually pretty brutal. I agree with you that they can wear what they like, but I do feel sometimes they maybe shouldn't. Then again, I'm an old man in my 40's and I understand that the 'culture' of body imagery has changed a great deal from when I was younger.


    You are judging and if your wife is worse I can't even imagine. People can wear whatever they want. You do not get to dictate that Nothing says you have to like it but to be so distracted that you are sitting there judging them instead of enjoying yourself is pretty sad. Go have fun. As someone also over 40, I've gone the exact opposite direction as you. I am at the live and let live point.
  • Freischuetz
    Freischuetz Posts: 147 Member
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    hopefully you will get old with your wife!

    a hell of wrinkels everywhere while loosing hair and growing hair at places you'll never figure out now!

    just a guess: that one of you both, that is able to keep the "young" look longer, will break up...

    good luck, and take care of your skin :D
  • RuNaRoUnDaFiEld
    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld Posts: 5,864 Member
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    I_am_the_Cosmos wrote: »
    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld wrote: »
    Wow, how awful of you sitting there judging them.

    They can wear what ever they like.

    I don't judge them, but leave that to my wife and her friends who are usually pretty brutal. I agree with you that they can wear what they like, but I do feel sometimes they maybe shouldn't. Then again, I'm an old man in my 40's and I understand that the 'culture' of body imagery has changed a great deal from when I was younger.

    It's not because you're in your 40s, I am also in my 40s.

    It's just that you aren't very nice.

  • I_am_the_Cosmos
    I_am_the_Cosmos Posts: 69 Member
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    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld wrote: »
    I_am_the_Cosmos wrote: »
    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld wrote: »
    Wow, how awful of you sitting there judging them.

    They can wear what ever they like.

    I don't judge them, but leave that to my wife and her friends who are usually pretty brutal. I agree with you that they can wear what they like, but I do feel sometimes they maybe shouldn't. Then again, I'm an old man in my 40's and I understand that the 'culture' of body imagery has changed a great deal from when I was younger.

    It's not because you're in your 40s, I am also in my 40s.

    It's just that you aren't very nice.

    So, because I feel maybe someone shouldn't wear something inappropriate, but keep said thought to myself and refrain from commenting I'm not very nice? Thanks, thought police!

    And I can't attest to where you came from or what era you apparently grew up in, but if you have memories of people dressing very inappropriately back in the 70's and 80's I'd like to hear it. Pretty sure the evolution of body imagery began a LOT more recently, which is why I kind of stated that my point of view maybe a dated one. I don't in any sense claim that I am right, just that it is a learned behavior from a different time. As opposed to simply assuming and attacking a message, you could have just said "Well, times have evolved and we should look at these people as being happy with their image". I would have agreed. The only point you are right on is my wife and her friends should probably be a little bit less pointed.

  • RandJ6280
    RandJ6280 Posts: 1,162 Member
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    wow.... not what I was expecting when I posted this.

    Maybe I am judging them..... but I think there should be a little more pride in their body. This isn't just geared for the overweight, but it's just as bas as some of the "skinny" people out there.... who will wear little to nothing on the beach. I was there with my grandkids, and they don't need to see a woman whose boobs are spilling out of her top and half of her *kitten* cheeks out of here bikini bottoms. I just think there should be a little of class, or dignity in society.
  • noclady1995
    noclady1995 Posts: 452 Member
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    I prefer to wear clothes that are both more modest and make me feel good. They're not typically baggy. But they do tend to cover more. One of my favorite style icons is Kate Middleton. I think wearing clothes that make you feel good, regardless of body type, will show your confidence the best.
  • WanderingRivers
    WanderingRivers Posts: 612 Member
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    I wear the baggy clothes I have because I can't justify the expense of replacing them when money is so tight.
  • RandJ6280
    RandJ6280 Posts: 1,162 Member
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    88olds wrote: »
    I weighed 285 lbs. Dressed like an unmade bed.
    For losing the first 25 lbs, I rewarded myself with a new suit. Game changer.

    I soon met Harry the tailor who made me the best dressed guy in my office. Clothes that fit can make a big difference. Taking pride in your appearance is an attitude. You can start any time.

    I agree. Glad you are moving up in the best dressed in the office. I know I have certain clothes that I wear make me feel taller, stronger (physically and emotionally).
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,710 Member
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    RandJ6280 wrote: »
    wow.... not what I was expecting when I posted this.

    Maybe I am judging them..... but I think there should be a little more pride in their body. This isn't just geared for the overweight, but it's just as bas as some of the "skinny" people out there.... who will wear little to nothing on the beach. I was there with my grandkids, and they don't need to see a woman whose boobs are spilling out of her top and half of her *kitten* cheeks out of here bikini bottoms. I just think there should be a little of class, or dignity in society.

    Ah, per the bold, now I see why it bothered you. However, you cannot shield kids from everything and if you were bothered by the lack of clothing then your option is to take them to a not so public place. People on the beach are free to dress as they wish. If you are concerned with what your grandkids see, then you have to take them to a kid-friendly (appropriate) place only.
  • IsabeausRose
    IsabeausRose Posts: 129 Member
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    Since I'm in between sizes I focus on other things besides clothes. I started wearing perfume more often and my grandmother's earrings every day. Maybe a pin or a necklace. Little things to make me feel pretty and feminine until I fit into those size 8 jeans and stay there.
  • canarysal
    canarysal Posts: 118 Member
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    Its down to confidence and feeling happy in your skin. I dress baggy when bigger and gradually buy more fitted clothes as lose weight but that's because I'm very self conscious and want to hide bulges rather than draw attention to. Nearly there.....
  • 4legsRbetterthan2
    4legsRbetterthan2 Posts: 19,590 MFP Moderator
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    I was never into clothes much as a teen. It took me until my later 20s to really figure out what styles are most flattering on my body type. Since I have done that and put a little more effort into my wardrobe I have found that it has helped boost my confidence a little more, and I think other people pick up on that too. I think wardrobe can be a powerful tool in helping you be your best. You gotta get past the uncomefortable baggy look and figure out what flatters you. Figuring that out now may still apply as your size goes down too. Alot of people keep their same shape, its just smaller or bigger at different weights.
  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
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    The more I lose, the more I dress to impress. I would say in a scale of 1 to 10, my vanity level used to be at a 5, now I'm at a good 8 or 9.

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