Was told everyone at work thinks I'm prego
elinordashed
Posts: 9 Member
This woman at work said "everyone thinks you're pregnant" today! I awkwardly laughed as I am single (and semi vocal about not wanting kids) (AND it would currently take the second coming of Jesus for that to be possible).
I even laughed with co-workers about it later and teased myself about my bulky sweater today.
But seriously! Wtf! Hurtful! Going home and incorporating wine into my dinner calories.
I even laughed with co-workers about it later and teased myself about my bulky sweater today.
But seriously! Wtf! Hurtful! Going home and incorporating wine into my dinner calories.
10
Replies
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AWWWW! Yes, indeed hurtful! (HUG)6
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I'm sorry that you work with idiots.
Not much you can do except tell yourself to ignore morons. Enjoy your wine!15 -
Also, maybe take up kickboxing and pretend your coworkers are present.23
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elinordashed wrote: »This woman at work said "everyone thinks you're pregnant" today! I awkwardly laughed as I am single (and semi vocal about not wanting kids) (AND it would currently take the second coming of Jesus for that to be possible).
I even laughed with co-workers about it later and teased myself about my bulky sweater today.
But seriously! Wtf! Hurtful! Going home and incorporating wine into my dinner calories.
How cruel! I'm so sorry that happened. Some people think making personal remarks about other people constitutes humor, so insensitive.6 -
SO g-d ignorant. You laughed it off which is the only way to answer such stupidity.
Can you cast around for a different employ? You can let HR know on the way out WHY you are leaving.6 -
Also, a lesson I learned a long time ago is I cannot speak for "everyone". I can only speak authoritatively about what I think and feel.
Anyone who hides behind "everyone" is not willing to stand behind their own words, and is trying to put more weight behind themselves than they have earned.25 -
Kitten those kitten-holes.28
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I had a similar experience once only I think the person involved was trying to be nice in my case. My son was about 5 (12 now) and I ran into an old acquaintance at the store who immediately yelled "OMG I didn't know you were having another. When are you due?" The whole store looked as I said "Not having more kids, just fat" then walked out the door mortified.
It was an awful feeling but was one of the motivating moment that led to my original 86lb loss18 -
Spread the word that you want Target and Amazon gift cards as baby gifts and then go shopping90
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I had a similar experience once only I think the person involved was trying to be nice in my case. My son was about 5 (12 now) and I ran into an old acquaintance at the store who immediately yelled "OMG I didn't know you were having another. When are you due?" The whole store looked as I said "Not having more kids, just fat" then walked out the door mortified.
It was an awful feeling but was one of the motivating moment that led to my original 86lb loss
Lord, how mortifying! I go by the Dave Barry rule - something along the lines of "Never assume a woman is pregnant unless you see an actual baby coming out of her."36 -
I had something similar happen as well, at my wedding. During the actual ceremony I was able to listen to my husband's mother discussing whether or not I was pregnant or if I was just fat. I ignored it, but I've wished I hadn't ever since. Especially when my husband told me after he would have been on my side had I paused the ceremony to ask her to STFU or get out. He has poor hearing so he wasn't aware until I told him.10
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Just wondering... Could there be a different reason? Like did you go to a happy hour and not drink or something? I'd hate to think someone would be that ignorant to comment so callously about your weight.5
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WOW, what a bunch of kittens.
I once confused one cousin of mine for another and congratulated her on a pregnancy that was non-existent, and I felt bad about that for weeks. Now, I don't say a word unless I'm commenting on an ultrasound picture or a baby shower invite. I can't imagine what kind of world someone must be living in to be that explicitly rude.
Enjoy your wine, and don't let a bunch of clueless a-holes ruin your week.5 -
MsMaeFlowers wrote: »I had something similar happen as well, at my wedding. During the actual ceremony I was able to listen to my husband's mother discussing whether or not I was pregnant or if I was just fat. I ignored it, but I've wished I hadn't ever since. Especially when my husband told me after he would have been on my side had I paused the ceremony to ask her to STFU or get out. He has poor hearing so he wasn't aware until I told him.
I really like your husband9 -
Im sorry you had such an insensitive comment said about you. It happens more often than alot of women care to admit. Right after delivering two of my babies,separate occasions, two separate father's with the same poor taste in sense of humor, knowing I had just delivered their sons. Made the comment "you sure there's not another one in there?" What are the chances. Stupid exes. Lol. Any whoo, big hugs,enjoy your wine and think about how fabulous you are and only gonna get better because you got a plan. All they have is their foot in their mouth.5
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That is so awful on many levels. I've been there. Just know that it reflects them and their character, not you.2
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I'm just going to say that there's no way that "everyone" thinks you're pregnant. She's being a *kitten* with a capital B, and it says a lot more about her tacky-*kitten* self than it does about you. She thought she found a "cute" way to call someone fat, which is total BS.18
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You all are lovely people. Thank you for making me laugh, making me feel supported, and also cringe at your own stories. Wow, people are something else! But you all are kind.
I took a bath, had a glass of wine, went for a walk, talked to my sister. I am rolling my eyes at my supervisor (seriously she needs a refresher course on what is appropriate to say) and planning on taking a sick day soon.37 -
elinordashed wrote: »You all are lovely people. Thank you for making me laugh, making me feel supported, and also cringe at your own stories. Wow, people are something else! But you all are kind.
I took a bath, had a glass of wine, went for a walk, talked to my sister. I am rolling my eyes at my supervisor (seriously she needs a refresher course on what is appropriate to say) and planning on taking a sick day soon.
Wait - this was your SUPERVISOR?!?! I missed that, if you mentioned it earlier. Is she in a contest with Michael Scott for worst boss ever?! That's way past inappropriate and she definitely needs some more training about interpersonal communication, as well as How Not to be an *kitten*.
I'd seriously consider reporting her to HR.22 -
Do you think she was telling you as a favor, so you'd know what people were saying behind your back? I'm just curious if her motivation was well intended and ruined it with horrible delivery. I'm not trying to protect her, I'm just curious if she did this stuff before being a jerk or if she really wanted to give you a heads up about the gossip. I've heard enough rumors about me from others and I was glad to hear them so I was prepared (and may have said/done things to mess with people's heads). Just one example - I had someone that works for my team tell me outside of work that her boss (who directly reported to me) was gossiping about me during my divorce (making up reasons for it). I'm very private at work so nobody knew any details so I was glad to know what's up.3
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Holy crap! Your SUPERVISOR?!
Wow. Just... wow.
I remember when I was young, my dad totally stuck his foot in his mouth with someone who had recently given birth. He thought she was pregnant again. She played it off well, sparing my dad some more awkwardness than he already felt when he realized his mistake, and I learned early to never, ever, ever comment on anyone's weight or potential pregnancy status until they something first.3 -
It's amazing out work colleagues can justify commenting on another colleagues weight. I am 49kgs and only just hit above 5 foot. I've been working really hard to eat healthy and exercise. I get told by work colleagues that I'm looking too skinny and I need to eat more and by other work colleagues asking if I'm pregnant because I eat every 3-4 hours (small, measured out meals). Most of them who comment are over weight and unhealthy too. It's unfuriating that people think it's okay to comment when they themselves are unhealthy!6
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Why would anyone tell you that? Do you feel comfortable asking them why they told you? People know they're being inappropriate, what they don't count on is being called out.6
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Wow. I hate those kinds of comments. Sorry you work with jerks.1
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In my company gossip is a fireable offense. First time we tell you we mean it. Second time take your sorry rear end somewhere else. We're too busy for that negative junk.9
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Wow that is rude!0
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FatAFNoMore wrote: »Do you think she was telling you as a favor, so you'd know what people were saying behind your back? I'm just curious if her motivation was well intended and ruined it with horrible delivery. I'm not trying to protect her, I'm just curious if she did this stuff before being a jerk or if she really wanted to give you a heads up about the gossip. I've heard enough rumors about me from others and I was glad to hear them so I was prepared (and may have said/done things to mess with people's heads). Just one example - I had someone that works for my team tell me outside of work that her boss (who directly reported to me) was gossiping about me during my divorce (making up reasons for it). I'm very private at work so nobody knew any details so I was glad to know what's up.
Except that she said she was told "everyone thinks your pregnant" not everyone is saying you are. It was still tacky in delivery. She is a supervisor, she can't be that dimwitted to not think something said that way would hurt. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt like you, but this you can see right through.1 -
I swear, one of my colleagues approached me yesterday and said quietly - can I ask you something?. I said - yes. She asked - are you pregnant? I was shocked. I mean seriously.. I'm not even that fat! 150 pounds! Perhaps, on the scale of how slim I was before compare to me now, maybe it might look like this. We have much bigger women in the office! What a horrible question, considering the fact that I have all these history with miscarriages. Never, never, never in a million years, if you see a woman, doesn't matter how big or fat she is, doesn't matter how curious you are, never ask her if she is pregnant. It's just a mined bomb ready to explode. You don't know the history, you don't know nothing. Obviously, it hurt me too.4
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She knew what she was doing, what a *kitten*2
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Nykkismommy21 wrote: »FatAFNoMore wrote: »Do you think she was telling you as a favor, so you'd know what people were saying behind your back? I'm just curious if her motivation was well intended and ruined it with horrible delivery. I'm not trying to protect her, I'm just curious if she did this stuff before being a witch or if she really wanted to give you a heads up about the gossip. I've heard enough rumors about me from others and I was glad to hear them so I was prepared (and may have said/done things to mess with people's heads). Just one example - I had someone that works for my team tell me outside of work that her boss (who directly reported to me) was gossiping about me during my divorce (making up reasons for it). I'm very private at work so nobody knew any details so I was glad to know what's up.
Except that she said she was told "everyone thinks your pregnant" not everyone is saying you are. It was still tacky in delivery. She is a supervisor, she can't be that dimwitted to not think something said that way would hurt. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt like you, but this you can see right through.
Yeah, that makes sense. I agree, AT BEST it was very mishandled. At worst, I don't even want to think about a supervisor wanting to hurt their team but it happens all too often. I'd call her a witch but I'm not allowed as apparently the thread is now about persecution (and grammar errors). Sorry to the OP and I hope you're doing okay as this was about you and your need to vent it out.3
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