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School Food Policies
Replies
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This is the thing that makes me laugh about this scenario: the kids I know have multiple chances a week to get treats like cookies, candy, etc. Go to the bank, get a sucker. Go to church, get a cookie during coffee hour. Visit Mom or Dad at work, get a piece of candy from the candy jar. Get your hair cut, get another piece of candy. Play a game of soccer, get a grab bag with Oreos and Capri Sun in it. Once I had a kid I realized that the parade of treats never ends. Missing one cookie is not a big loss.7
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No, if the rule is that you don't get a cookie unless you eat the healthy snack, then rules are rules and your littler perfect child doesn't get a pass for being a brat. Kids need discipline! They don't need all these choices and options to make them happy. They are kids. Their likes and dislikes change almost hourly and they need structure to keep them in line.
Maybe I should tell my boss that I don't want to do my work but I still demand my paycheck?
UGH I wish I could homeschool.11 -
Need2Exerc1se wrote: »GlassAngyl wrote: »Children will always choose desire over common sense. It's up to adults to help the child to build good habits. Personally, I don't think cookies should have been offered at all. In my home, there is no desert. There is no sweet reward for doing what is expected of you. This creates a mind set that they should be rewarded for eating right which can lead to over eating later on in life instead of eating till you are full.
Remember the "Finish what's on your plate if you want desert." from childhood? Remember eating past the point of full just for a cookie or ice cream cone? Anyone regret or resent their parents for teaching them that? I do. I won't make my kids fat.. Junk is reserved for special occasions like birthdays and holidays.
I grew up in a finish what's on your plate if you want dessert home. I think it taught me good habits by teaching me which foods are important for health and which are treats.
Same here. I don't remember eating past the point of being full, but then, my mom always gave me reasonable portions. She started us with small portions and we were welcome to seconds if we wanted them.
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Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
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TavistockToad wrote: »WeepingAngel81 wrote: »My kids, like any other kids, will go on a binge when I am not home.
Really? that's a bit of a sweeping generalisation isn't it? i never binged as a kid, and we always had a well stocked treat cupboard at home. it was only as an adult when i moved out of home that i gained any weight.
I found that interesting too. As a kid, I was already chubby, but I never binged or snuck around in food at home or anywhere else. I remember around age 9 or 10, when I started having friends over to spend the night and for short periods after school when my parents weren't there...my friends would be DYING to get into whatever snacks were in the cabinets and fridge. Almost all of my friends did this, skinny, fat, third grade friends all the way up to high school. I remember one girl ate the entire package (probably half full) of Nesquick powder, and another friend was all big eyes "We should make mashed potatoes!" when she saw the box of instant potatoes...she made them, and then put a cup of margarine in them.
You just never know, I guess. The only thing I wanted to get more of was Halloween chocolate.
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rheddmobile wrote: »Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
Sorry, but it took you 40 years to learn to eat appropriately just because your parent(s) told you to clean your plate?3 -
Need2Exerc1se wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
Sorry, but it took you 40 years to learn to eat appropriately just because your parent(s) told you to clean your plate?
And may I ask why you are on this site? It's not all healthy skinny people with great relationships to food here.
Over half of Americans are overweight. It's not because our culture is smart about how we teach our children to eat. Cultures such as France which do not use food as rewards have much lower rates of obesity.8 -
WeepingAngel81 wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »GlassAngyl wrote: »Children will always choose desire over common sense. It's up to adults to help the child to build good habits. Personally, I don't think cookies should have been offered at all. In my home, there is no desert. There is no sweet reward for doing what is expected of you. This creates a mind set that they should be rewarded for eating right which can lead to over eating later on in life instead of eating till you are full.
Remember the "Finish what's on your plate if you want desert." from childhood? Remember eating past the point of full just for a cookie or ice cream cone? Anyone regret or resent their parents for teaching them that? I do. I won't make my kids fat.. Junk is reserved for special occasions like birthdays and holidays.
I grew up in a finish what's on your plate if you want dessert home. I think it taught me good habits by teaching me which foods are important for health and which are treats.
Same here. I don't remember eating past the point of being full, but then, my mom always gave me reasonable portions. She started us with small portions and we were welcome to seconds if we wanted them.
Yes, this is me too.
I'm glad I was required to eat my vegetables, as I learned to like them. Overeating wasn't really an issue (and I was always a thin or normal weight child), maybe my mom just had a good sense of portion. (We also could usually get more if we wanted.)1 -
rheddmobile wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
Sorry, but it took you 40 years to learn to eat appropriately just because your parent(s) told you to clean your plate?
And may I ask why you are on this site? It's not all healthy skinny people with great relationships to food here.
Over half of Americans are overweight. It's not because our culture is smart about how we teach our children to eat. Cultures such as France which do not use food as rewards have much lower rates of obesity.
LOL Only Americans must eat dinner before dessert? But that has little to do with why it would take 40 years to unlearn such a simple thing.
We aren't overweight because of having to finish dinner before getting dessert either. That has been going on for many generations. Most of us being overweight has not.3 -
Need2Exerc1se wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
Sorry, but it took you 40 years to learn to eat appropriately just because your parent(s) told you to clean your plate?
And may I ask why you are on this site? It's not all healthy skinny people with great relationships to food here.
Over half of Americans are overweight. It's not because our culture is smart about how we teach our children to eat. Cultures such as France which do not use food as rewards have much lower rates of obesity.
LOL Only Americans must eat dinner before dessert? But that has little to do with why it would take 40 years to unlearn such a simple thing.
You failed to answer my question. Why are you here? You don't get to attack me personally without sharing more about how you are in every way perfect and how you got that way.6 -
rheddmobile wrote: »Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
My kids aren't sneaking them. I was leaving them out in plain site. I work 12 hours shifts, so if I wasn't there to actually heat up the food I had prepped for them, they would just eat the junk food in arms reach.lemurcat12 wrote: »WeepingAngel81 wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »GlassAngyl wrote: »Children will always choose desire over common sense. It's up to adults to help the child to build good habits. Personally, I don't think cookies should have been offered at all. In my home, there is no desert. There is no sweet reward for doing what is expected of you. This creates a mind set that they should be rewarded for eating right which can lead to over eating later on in life instead of eating till you are full.
Remember the "Finish what's on your plate if you want desert." from childhood? Remember eating past the point of full just for a cookie or ice cream cone? Anyone regret or resent their parents for teaching them that? I do. I won't make my kids fat.. Junk is reserved for special occasions like birthdays and holidays.
I grew up in a finish what's on your plate if you want dessert home. I think it taught me good habits by teaching me which foods are important for health and which are treats.
Same here. I don't remember eating past the point of being full, but then, my mom always gave me reasonable portions. She started us with small portions and we were welcome to seconds if we wanted them.
Yes, this is me too.
I'm glad I was required to eat my vegetables, as I learned to like them. Overeating wasn't really an issue (and I was always a thin or normal weight child), maybe my mom just had a good sense of portion. (We also could usually get more if we wanted.)
Along with this, I should add that my parents allowed us to choose 1 veggie that we were exempt from eating. I chose squash hahah! I love squash now.
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rheddmobile wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
Sorry, but it took you 40 years to learn to eat appropriately just because your parent(s) told you to clean your plate?
And may I ask why you are on this site? It's not all healthy skinny people with great relationships to food here.
Over half of Americans are overweight. It's not because our culture is smart about how we teach our children to eat. Cultures such as France which do not use food as rewards have much lower rates of obesity.
LOL Only Americans must eat dinner before dessert? But that has little to do with why it would take 40 years to unlearn such a simple thing.
You failed to answer my question. Why are you here? You don't get to attack me personally without sharing more about how you are in every way perfect and how you got that way.
I asked a question but I'm here to play on the forums. And occasionally get recipe ideas. If you asking if I'm overweight, no. I was, and now I'm not. My weight gain had nothing to do with being told to clean my plate as a child. It was because I chose to overeat. All my fault. Not my parents.7 -
WeepingAngel81 wrote: »Along with this, I should add that my parents allowed us to choose 1 veggie that we were exempt from eating. I chose squash hahah! I love squash now.
Oh how I wish my parents had done that. I missed a lot of desserts because of broccoli.
*love your username!4 -
Need2Exerc1se wrote: »WeepingAngel81 wrote: »Along with this, I should add that my parents allowed us to choose 1 veggie that we were exempt from eating. I chose squash hahah! I love squash now.
Oh how I wish my parents had done that. I missed a lot of desserts because of broccoli.
*love your username!
Yeah, I adored my older sister when I was younger, so I chose what she chose. Turns out, my mom hardly ever made squash! I wish I would've chosen lima beans (they would have let me get away as using them as my veggie). She cooked those darn things all the time! I have not touched a lima bean since I moved out!
And thanks! Those Angels are my fav Who villain!
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becoming a parent has this weird effect of making a human being lose total grip on logic, reality, and perspective.12
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In my family, perseverance in face of hunger was key. For me it was fish. Fish, to me, smell and taste disgusting. Gag inducing horrible. But mom served fish every Friday. 5 to 10 weeks of me happily agreeing to go hungry and not eat any Friday dinner or desert so I didn't have to eat fish convinced my mother that I could have leftover Thursday or Wednesday entree meal instead. For my brother it was ham. Like me with fish, he cant stomach the smell or taste. Again, he had to persevere, not complain and just choose to go without food at all the she gave in.
Lol, I still remember some of the enticing deserts she offered up as a reward for eating fish. To this day I don't touch fish or seafood, and get sick if a restaurant has a strong fishy smell ( which normal fish eating friends assure me is usually a sign of fish past it's natural "Best By" date.)1 -
rheddmobile wrote: »Need2Exerc1se wrote: »rheddmobile wrote: »Teaching kids to think of unhealthy foods as a reward is not a good thing, and neither is forcing children to eat foods they don't want to eat. Either give cookies or don't but don't make them contingent on eating something else.
Yes, I grew up in a household which made me clean my plate before I ate dessert. And like the OP's children I learned to sneak snacks and binge on them as a result. Healthy children raised in cultures which don't use food as a reward don't naturally do this. It's taken me forty years to retrain myself that I can eat an appropriate amount of food because I can have more when I want it.
Sorry, but it took you 40 years to learn to eat appropriately just because your parent(s) told you to clean your plate?
And may I ask why you are on this site? It's not all healthy skinny people with great relationships to food here.
Over half of Americans are overweight. It's not because our culture is smart about how we teach our children to eat. Cultures such as France which do not use food as rewards have much lower rates of obesity.
The French typically eat 3 meals per day with little to no snacking. But...they tend to have large leisurely lunches and four course dinners which would obviously include both appetizers and desert...I wouldn't say the French don't use food as reward...the French take eating very seriously and have a great passion for food...7 -
Don't see that the school did anything nefarious. Don't think the kid will suffer any long lasting damage, kids are pretty resilient. I also don't see anything wrong with kids getting one cookie as a snack. What our kids need to learn about foods like cookies and ice cream is moderation, not abstinence. Same thing with alcohol, food, etc.4
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My daughter's school has a great policy. If you are hungry, you can eat during class time, BUT only if it is fresh fruit or fresh veggies. No hummus, or ranch dressing, or dried fruit. Only fresh fruit/veg. No restrictions on what they can eat at lunch (other than what restrictions parents impose).
I love it, because it acknowledges that kids get hungry throughout the day, but encourages healthy snacking. Plus, if it's nice out, they can eat lunch outside.
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I don't like this hard and fast categorization of the apple as healthy and the cookie as unhealthy. Food is more nutritious or less nutritious and contributes to people being healthy or not. Maybe the apple offers more nutrition than the cookie.. maybe, but maybe the kid ate fruit for breakfast and has fruit with lunch and will have fruit for a snack after school. Then isn't fruit as a snack at school a bit redundant? As has been said, the teacher set up an expectation and rightfully followed through, but I'm not sure it was the best way to approach the situation. Let's just say I'm glad I don't have to figure this out yet. I don't know what strategy I stand behind.2
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well, my kids ate pretty much what ever they liked, we would introduced new foods, but never forced them to eat anything they did not like, we also introduced them into preparing their own foods at a young age two of my kids are in college the other in HS, all decent eaters, average weight actually on the thin side if anything. WE never micro-managed our kids diets, it was a mix of healthy and junk food.4
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WeepingAngel81 wrote: »I am in a mom group on facebook, and yesterday there was a post created that had me wondering what other parents here think.
A child refused to eat the healthy snack that was offered to her. The deal was, if you eat your healthy snack, you can have a cookie. She was not given a cookie, and according to the mom posting, she was the only one not given a cookie. The mom the asked for other opinions.
Most of the opinions fell into the "burn her" category, calling the teacher many derogatory names. Many people said that children should have the choice to decide what they want to eat without consequences, and that if they choose a cookie of the fruit or veggie option, it should be allowed. One person said that every child should be given a cookie no matter the circumstance.
What are your thoughts?.
My thoughts are that the school has a food policy then that needs to apply equally to all kids and be followed through on. Making a rule and not following it sometimes is more confusing to kids. I would have told my child that was the rule at school. I would not make it a big deal.
If the parent wants the policy changed they should approach the teacher and administration with their views instead of posting on facebook. The school could stop offering cookies as a manipulation to get kids to eat the other food though and just offer nutritious snacks only with a sticker chart instead. Obviously the cookie bribe worked for the rest of the class though.
I'm assuming these are young kids as they have a snack time. The child may be new to a classroom or group setting. The child may not understand the rule. It would probably be best for the parent to have a discussion with the child on why they turned down the snack and why the rule exists.
The teacher doesn't deserve to be called names unless there was a lot more to the story. It was just missing out on one cookie.
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As a teacher and parent, I'd like to first say that childhood obesity is a serious issue in america. Kids DO NOT have the cognitive ability to make healthy choices at a young age, this is a fact.
I don't see an issue with this, I don't allow cookies/junk food in my room for snacks anyway, just give the healthy option. But to be allowed to only eat the unhealthy, not in my classroom. Mom and Dad can stuff sugar in your mouth all night, not in my classroom. I make kids throw out lollipops on the way into my class. Even if another teacher gave it to them. I often say "get cavities on your own time."
As a parent. I of course have to deal with my child all the time. I try to model healthy eating but I absolutely enforce a healthy first approach. No way my kid is eating ice cream if he was "too full" for dinner.
Finally, as a teacher on the front line of American youth. There is simply WAY too much entitlement in children, and its not their fault. Parenting is ever-evolving but I am still seeing the effects of the "my kids are my best friend/special snowflake/should never fail or be told no," strategy. I can see it in some kids face that I am literally the first adult that has told them no to an option they really want. How is that possible at 12/13?!? My wife even does this a little. My kid always had to win at candyland, scrabble jr, etc. We went bowling 2 weeks ago, and now that he can read, he could tell he wasn't winning....instant meltdown. Kids always learn more in failure than constant success. Don't be afraid to say no or let them fail or deal with a tough outcome.
Finally, let parents parent, and let teachers teach. I may not know your child as well as you do, but I know 12 and 13 years old better than anyone. I know what I'm doing, you might not always agree. I promise its fair, I promise to help them grow. Yes, there are bad teachers, but this situation seems to be the "internet pitckfork effect" over nothing. If you see more and more issues, bring it up with the teacher first, then administration if needed. Trying to instill healthy eating should never be seen as a negative even if its misguided.17 -
distinctlybeautiful wrote: »I don't like this hard and fast categorization of the apple as healthy and the cookie as unhealthy. Food is more nutritious or less nutritious and contributes to people being healthy or not. Maybe the apple offers more nutrition than the cookie.. maybe, but maybe the kid ate fruit for breakfast and has fruit with lunch and will have fruit for a snack after school. Then isn't fruit as a snack at school a bit redundant? As has been said, the teacher set up an expectation and rightfully followed through, but I'm not sure it was the best way to approach the situation. Let's just say I'm glad I don't have to figure this out yet. I don't know what strategy I stand behind.
There would be no registered dietitians that would agree with this. Not likely to happen anyway as a small % of the population gets the recommended amount of fruit and veggies in their diets.
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Packerjohn wrote: »There would be no registered dietitians that would agree with this. Not likely to happen anyway as a small % of the population gets the recommended amount of fruit and veggies in their diets.
Unfortunately, its sad when you learn the % of kids that aren't getting any breakfast or dinner so I agree4 -
As my mom said "I'd you aren't hungry enough for an apple, you aren't hungry enough for a cookie, either." I have no problem with adults making sure children's nutrition needs are met and teaching them how to make health a priority.8
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Parents have to provide a packed lunch in Australia. Usually I pack a piece of fruit, 2 small fruit pillow biscuits and a wholemeal sandwich and sometimes a plain yoghurt. They generally eat it all. Occasionally one of my kids will grumble about what other kids get. But I'm not budging.1
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Okay, hate to tell all the people here that if they think their kids are great "healthy" eaters, then they are likely blinded by faith.
Working as a yard duty in a middle school at lunch time, I see these kids eat everyday. The majority of kids I see are trading food with friends or even given things like cookies or chips if they don't have them in their brown bag lunch. Lol, and half the kids toss away the fruit , bars and sandwiches sent with the "healthy" lunch.
Hate to tell you that if you as a parent aren't there to see them eat their food and make their choices for them, they are going to just eat what they feel like eating.
Myself as a parent, I don't focus on just one meal. I KNOW my daughter eats other stuff for lunch other than what I give her and that's okay. I take care of the other 2 meals she eats and she eats those because if she doesn't, she'll end up hungry.
And let's face it, once you move out of the house, you're likely going to eat anyway you want anyway. I lived on fast food for years once I moved out. I just knew that I couldn't eat too much of it or my weight would get out of control. IMO, it's teaching kids not only balance and why nutritious food should be part of their meals, but how NOT to overeat.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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I take this as being more about actions and consequences than about health. Eat the apple = get a cookie. The teacher stuck to what she said. Kids need to learn the actions/consequences relationship. If your mommy throws a fit when you don't get the reward offered for something you did not do, how are you supposed to learn this. If she had been given a cookie anyway she would be learning that you don't actually have to do what is required of you to get the reward.2
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As a teacher, I can say with certainty that when a child comes home and says, "I was the only one..." it's not always true.12
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