Chronic depression and exercise

explodingmango wrote: »

Speaking as someone who also has clinical mental blocks getting in his way and knows unpleasantly well what it's like, but is currently doing a pretty damned good job staying on top of it:

For one, the best piece of general advice I've seen to conquer workout-slacking inertia is, go to the gym for a set amount of time. Maybe an hour, maybe half an hour, it all depends on what fits in your schedule and what works for you. Now, here's the kicker - once you're there, allow yourself to slack off. With this plan you don't actually have to exercise once you're there. You just have to stay for your whole committed duration.

You'll probably have days where you just sit around and play on your phone. That's fine. But it's pretty likely that at some point, you'll find yourself bored with sitting, and you'll decide, okay, fine, you'll play with your phone while taking a leisurely stroll on the treadmill instead, or something like that. Congratulations! You are now moving not because of a sense of duty, but because you chose, willingly, to do that instead of just sitting around. Once you've cleared that barrier, it's a lot easier to ride that momentum to get back into doing and enjoying a "full" workout.

For two, I'm going to offer you something that, on the surface, might sound like the advice dear old Aunt Yogapants, who has never been depressed a day in her life and thinks depression is just a way to pathologize being bummed out and a tool to sell drugs, might give you, but it is anything but. I devised this strategy under the guidance of my therapist; it is explicitly designed for people with anxiety, depression, or other disorders that leave one feeling lethargic and disconnected. It's not a magic cure-all, there is no such thing, but it is likely to serve as a valuable tool in your coping toolkit.

The strategy is this: Take a camera - your phone is ideal for this, especially if you have an app that lets you add comments to the photos - and go for a slow, leisurely walk wherever you can convince yourself to go. While you're walking, make an active, conscious effort to notice things around you, and things you feel (focusing on the neutral to positive, but being aware of the negative has value, too). Mentally take inventory of the sounds around you - see if you can pick out little things that usually get drowned out (such as, for example, birds chirping among the city noise). Feel the terrain under your feet and take a moment to focus on that sensation. If you see anything interesting, anything at all that speaks to you, take a photo of it and take a moment to describe (either in your head or as a caption) what you find so striking about it. Just keep moving, and keep making an active effort toward being aware of the world around you.

This is meant to accomplish 3 things:

1. Because it's very low-intensity, you minimize the capacity your depression has to convince you that it's really "too hard" - thus, even on days when your depression is leaving you unable to stand the idea of breaking a sweat, you can keep yourself moving anyway. Additionally, it can be performed anywhere - even just around your own house (and just like with the going to the gym plan, "I'm not up to exercise, I'll just take my awareness walk around the house today" can end up being a springboard into going outside and around the block).
2. You are performing mindfulness/grounding exercises. That "active awareness" is generally considered one of the most useful tools for the "retraining your brain" side of recovery.
3. You are making a photographic record of things that made you feel something significant, that you can look back on in those moments when the depression tries to tell you that life is all lethargy, boredom, and numbness.

For three, if you're experiencing executive dysfunction, especially of the "clinically enforced procrastination" variety - that is, if you keep finding yourself saying "I'm gonna go to the gym. Yep, I'm gonna go to the gym. Come on, body, let's go to the gym!" and yet for some reason you just can't make yourself move - when you notice it's happening, my recommendation is to start counting down from 20, and plan to get out of your seat at 0. This forces you to clear your mind of the blocks (because you're too busy thinking about the numbers) and helps you sort of "reset", and can even make you a little impatient to get to whatever it is you're trying to do (kind of like how the last 20 seconds on the microwave seem to last 10 minutes) - you may even find yourself getting up before 0.

Finally, note and congratulate yourself for small achievements. When depression is screaming that you didn't do enough, make a point to remind yourself consciously that you did infinitely better than the depression wanted to let you do. It may not sink in easily - at first you may just be repeating what you know on a factual level but have a horrible time convincing yourself of it on an emotional level - but if anything will make it sink in, it's repetition. If possible, get people who understand what you're going through to help with those affirmations (and this forum might be a good place to start!).

I hope any of these strategies prove useful to you.

explodingmango wrote: »

Speaking as someone who also has clinical mental blocks getting in his way and knows unpleasantly well what it's like, but is currently doing a pretty damned good job staying on top of it:

For one, the best piece of general advice I've seen to conquer workout-slacking inertia is, go to the gym for a set amount of time. Maybe an hour, maybe half an hour, it all depends on what fits in your schedule and what works for you. Now, here's the kicker - once you're there, allow yourself to slack off. With this plan you don't actually have to exercise once you're there. You just have to stay for your whole committed duration.

You'll probably have days where you just sit around and play on your phone. That's fine. But it's pretty likely that at some point, you'll find yourself bored with sitting, and you'll decide, okay, fine, you'll play with your phone while taking a leisurely stroll on the treadmill instead, or something like that. Congratulations! You are now moving not because of a sense of duty, but because you chose, willingly, to do that instead of just sitting around. Once you've cleared that barrier, it's a lot easier to ride that momentum to get back into doing and enjoying a "full" workout.

For two, I'm going to offer you something that, on the surface, might sound like the advice dear old Aunt Yogapants, who has never been depressed a day in her life and thinks depression is just a way to pathologize being bummed out and a tool to sell drugs, might give you, but it is anything but. I devised this strategy under the guidance of my therapist; it is explicitly designed for people with anxiety, depression, or other disorders that leave one feeling lethargic and disconnected. It's not a magic cure-all, there is no such thing, but it is likely to serve as a valuable tool in your coping toolkit.

The strategy is this: Take a camera - your phone is ideal for this, especially if you have an app that lets you add comments to the photos - and go for a slow, leisurely walk wherever you can convince yourself to go. While you're walking, make an active, conscious effort to notice things around you, and things you feel (focusing on the neutral to positive, but being aware of the negative has value, too). Mentally take inventory of the sounds around you - see if you can pick out little things that usually get drowned out (such as, for example, birds chirping among the city noise). Feel the terrain under your feet and take a moment to focus on that sensation. If you see anything interesting, anything at all that speaks to you, take a photo of it and take a moment to describe (either in your head or as a caption) what you find so striking about it. Just keep moving, and keep making an active effort toward being aware of the world around you.

This is meant to accomplish 3 things:

1. Because it's very low-intensity, you minimize the capacity your depression has to convince you that it's really "too hard" - thus, even on days when your depression is leaving you unable to stand the idea of breaking a sweat, you can keep yourself moving anyway. Additionally, it can be performed anywhere - even just around your own house (and just like with the going to the gym plan, "I'm not up to exercise, I'll just take my awareness walk around the house today" can end up being a springboard into going outside and around the block).
2. You are performing mindfulness/grounding exercises. That "active awareness" is generally considered one of the most useful tools for the "retraining your brain" side of recovery.
3. You are making a photographic record of things that made you feel something significant, that you can look back on in those moments when the depression tries to tell you that life is all lethargy, boredom, and numbness.

For three, if you're experiencing executive dysfunction, especially of the "clinically enforced procrastination" variety - that is, if you keep finding yourself saying "I'm gonna go to the gym. Yep, I'm gonna go to the gym. Come on, body, let's go to the gym!" and yet for some reason you just can't make yourself move - when you notice it's happening, my recommendation is to start counting down from 20, and plan to get out of your seat at 0. This forces you to clear your mind of the blocks (because you're too busy thinking about the numbers) and helps you sort of "reset", and can even make you a little impatient to get to whatever it is you're trying to do (kind of like how the last 20 seconds on the microwave seem to last 10 minutes) - you may even find yourself getting up before 0.

Finally, note and congratulate yourself for small achievements. When depression is screaming that you didn't do enough, make a point to remind yourself consciously that you did infinitely better than the depression wanted to let you do. It may not sink in easily - at first you may just be repeating what you know on a factual level but have a horrible time convincing yourself of it on an emotional level - but if anything will make it sink in, it's repetition. If possible, get people who understand what you're going through to help with those affirmations (and this forum might be a good place to start!).

I hope any of these strategies prove useful to you.