Anxiety over reaching target weight?
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Piperx222
Posts: 68 Member
Anyone else have issues when they have reached or are reaching their target weight?
When I started I honestly never thought I would actually reach my goal weight. I started at 244 with a goal of 140ish. Back in May I reached my goal of 140 and then kind of lost my way. I should have been excited, I did it! But I felt terrified. I didn't know what to do anymore. I have always been the heavy girl. Always trying to either lose weight and just not caring and gaining.
Looking back I see that I totally self sabotaged (twice) gaining 10lbs over the summer. Now I'm working my way back to my goal weight AGAIN and I don't want to fall back into old habits. I am very much an emotional and binge eater and have been working very hard to overcome and curb those habits. I don't understand why I'm so scared to reach my goal and stay there...
Anyone else stressing about reaching there goal?
When I started I honestly never thought I would actually reach my goal weight. I started at 244 with a goal of 140ish. Back in May I reached my goal of 140 and then kind of lost my way. I should have been excited, I did it! But I felt terrified. I didn't know what to do anymore. I have always been the heavy girl. Always trying to either lose weight and just not caring and gaining.
Looking back I see that I totally self sabotaged (twice) gaining 10lbs over the summer. Now I'm working my way back to my goal weight AGAIN and I don't want to fall back into old habits. I am very much an emotional and binge eater and have been working very hard to overcome and curb those habits. I don't understand why I'm so scared to reach my goal and stay there...
Anyone else stressing about reaching there goal?
5
Replies
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It is super common when you have an impossible dream to reach, you work hard for a long time and then one day, BAM! You reached your goal. Now what?
That is what you are experiencing. You were so entirely focused on reaching the impossible that you forgot one thing: the plan for once you reach your goal.
So, this time around you know. This time around, you plan for the 1st goal (loosing those 10 pounds) AND you plan for the 2nd goal (what to do for the next month after you reach your first goal) AND you plan for the 3rd goal (what to do after you reach your 1st and 2nd goals).
Make sense?7 -
Use the information that you have (.....that I am an emotional binge eater....) to ypir advantage.
There are triggers along the way....you just dont sit down and eat that tub of ice cream in 20 minutes, right? ☺
There are triggers along that path. Figure out what those triggers are...understand how you respond to those triggers and learn to change that response.
It is going to take time and practice. You WILL fail - often. No worries. We are human. It takes time and practice to relearn behavior. Celebrate the successes along the path. And there will be lots of successes. Dont beat yourself up when yoy fall a little short.
Keep in mind that being aware of the triggers is HUGE. The behavior will change....but you have to first recognize "okay, this is where things start for me". That is huge.
You will get there. Be patient with yourself.6 -
Maintenance IS hard because it does almost feel goalless so you can sometimes feel a drift and maintenance and logging can almost become more of a chore because you've got the results you want right? As the above poster says setting new goals is key, I'm going to be quitting smoking and try exercising more now I'm nearly in my goal range, I know it will effect my appetite so I have to carry on logging otherwise I will put the weight back on.
So my advice is set new goals that give you a reason to carry on logging, because logging during maintenance and constantly recalculating your needs to stay in your desired weight range is key. x
Oh yeah and my other advice is have a weight range, mines about 125-133, because your weight does shift about constantly6 -
Great idea...regarding the weight range, instead of a static number. Good catch....I usually suggest that, just did not here.3
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Thank you, I appreciate the feed back and suggestions! I was really not expecting maintaining to be so frustrating and difficult. Definitely took me by surprise.1
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You are so very welcome. Agreed. It is really all about setting the proper goals. The mind is a very powerful thing. And left to its own devices.....well, you see what it can do!2
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This was exactly me a few weeks ago! I didn't lose nearly as much as you (was going from 150 to 135) but it was the mentality of it. I hit my goal weight and goal measurements, haven't been this small since I was a teenager, and yet I was kinda "meh" about it. Some very smart MFP'ers suggested I make myself some new fitness related goals instead of weight goals, and that has helped with the feeling of being adrift.3
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Maintenance is for life. We still have a scale goal of staying within our target range and seeing that number everyday is still motivating. I find that I see the fluctuations more since they're not offset by true fat losses. That can be hard to see, but that's why it's helpful to have a 5-10 lb range.
I always had goals in many areas while losing, not just the scale, so I've continued that in maintenance. Fitness goals, new activities, new milestones, new recipes, new ingredients, etc. I've now successfully maintained for a year, something I never did before. I always started gaining back immediately after major losses. So I spent 2.5 years while losing 150 to figure out why I failed before and what I was going to do different this time. For me, it means continuing to weigh daily, plot my weight trends in Happy Scale, and resume eating at a deficit as soon as I move above my goal range. No more saying that 5-10 lb gain isn't a big deal. That's what the range is for.
As far emotional binge eating, my main tips are 1) don't keep foods in the house that you binge on. If they MUST be there for others, set up separate storage areas and keep all food except fruit out of sight. 2) have something else to do when the emotions hit, like a walk, yoga, whatever activity you like. 3) Print out a sequence of progress pics and post them where you see them often. Visual reminders of my success help me keep on track even in maintenance. I just don't want to go back to where I was.10 -
I'm having a tough time settling in too. You're not alone. It doesn't help that I feel way hungrier in maintenance than I did in a deficit. Expanding my palette of foods has also set off all kinds of cravings. I'm at about the 6 month mark and hoping it gets easier as time goes by.7
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Your not alone I started at 330 I hit my goal weight of 165 then decided let's get to 155 I did that now I'm heading to 150. I'm trying to eat a little more each day although it's a struggle. I've only been in maintenance since the beginning of the month. I've been down this road before and don't want to go back. You can friend me if you want we can help each other
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Your not alone I started at 330 I hit my goal weight of 165 then decided let's get to 155 I did that now I'm heading to 150. I'm trying to eat a little more each day although it's a struggle. I've only been in maintenance since the beginning of the month. I've been down this road before and don't want to go back. You can friend me if you want we can help each other
Congrats on your success! Request sent
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I'm having a tough time settling in too. You're not alone. It doesn't help that I feel way hungrier in maintenance than I did in a deficit. Expanding my palette of foods has also set off all kinds of cravings. I'm at about the 6 month mark and hoping it gets easier as time goes by.
Not that I'm happy that others are finding it difficult too, but I feel better that I'm not the other person having this issue. I was feeling like I was broken or lost my mind or something. I hope it gets easier for both of us3 -
Maintenance is for life. We still have a scale goal of staying within our target range and seeing that number everyday is still motivating. I find that I see the fluctuations more since they're not offset by true fat losses. That can be hard to see, but that's why it's helpful to have a 5-10 lb range.
I always had goals in many areas while losing, not just the scale, so I've continued that in maintenance. Fitness goals, new activities, new milestones, new recipes, new ingredients, etc. I've now successfully maintained for a year, something I never did before. I always started gaining back immediately after major losses. So I spent 2.5 years while losing 150 to figure out why I failed before and what I was going to do different this time. For me, it means continuing to weigh daily, plot my weight trends in Happy Scale, and resume eating at a deficit as soon as I move above my goal range. No more saying that 5-10 lb gain isn't a big deal. That's what the range is for.
As far emotional binge eating, my main tips are 1) don't keep foods in the house that you binge on. If they MUST be there for others, set up separate storage areas and keep all food except fruit out of sight. 2) have something else to do when the emotions hit, like a walk, yoga, whatever activity you like. 3) Print out a sequence of progress pics and post them where you see them often. Visual reminders of my success help me keep on track even in maintenance. I just don't want to go back to where I was.
Thanks I appreciate the tips!0 -
This is a quote from the TV Series Elementary, change sobriety to maintainence and it sums it up very well, you need to find a way to thrive in maintenance, for everyone it is different, I try to challenge myself with new activities like hula hooping in front of the TV, at first it was very hard now I can do it on one foot!3
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ChristineE63 wrote: »This is a quote from the TV Series Elementary, change sobriety to maintainence and it sums it up very well, you need to find a way to thrive in maintenance, for everyone it is different, I try to challenge myself with new activities like hula hooping in front of the TV, at first it was very hard now I can do it on one foot!
Thank you, for the quote I had never really thought of it that way... Very valid way to think about it.0 -
I am going through a similar experience.
Lost 40, then gained some back. Relost that weight, then this weekend reached 50. I spent the entire weekend sad and crying. What made it worse was I didn't know WHY I was sad, it seemed so silly. I felt no major crisis when I lost the 40.
I have had zero appetite, even though now I have some freedom to eat more.
I am also scared of re-gaining, I am unsure what maintenance will bring and when I look at the mirror and my progress pics I have no idea who I am.
I have found chatting with supportive friends have helped, and time is helping too. I find comfort knowing that even though maintenance is a change MFP is going to help me track what I eat and stay connected. The reason I regained the first time was I left here. This time I am staying and keeping control.
Our feelings are OK! And we will be OK!3 -
I know the feeling well as it's the same predicament I currently mind myself in. On last weight in I was within .3 pounds of goal and I sure I have probably hit it by now. I have not weighted in a couple weeks. When I first set my goal weight 13 months ago the number I decided upon was fairly arbitrary. It was just a number I tossed out there because it sounded good. Now that I am there, I am not so sure it's the place I really need to be. While I am no longer considered overweight by the standards of modern medicine, I am on the upper end of that threshold. Though I admit I might just be using this as an excuse so I don't have to stop. For 13 months, this life is all I have known, and the uncertainty of change is a bit scary. You would think I would be jumping for joy at the prospect of increasing my calories and going into maintain mode, but I am far from it.3
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Anyone else have issues when they have reached or are reaching their target weight?
When I started I honestly never thought I would actually reach my goal weight. I started at 244 with a goal of 140ish. Back in May I reached my goal of 140 and then kind of lost my way. I should have been excited, I did it! But I felt terrified. I didn't know what to do anymore. I have always been the heavy girl. Always trying to either lose weight and just not caring and gaining.
Looking back I see that I totally self sabotaged (twice) gaining 10lbs over the summer. Now I'm working my way back to my goal weight AGAIN and I don't want to fall back into old habits. I am very much an emotional and binge eater and have been working very hard to overcome and curb those habits. I don't understand why I'm so scared to reach my goal and stay there...
Anyone else stressing about reaching there goal?
If the 2011 version of me saw the 2017 version of me I probably would have not been able to believe it and would have said I had a "dream body." But all 2017 me sees is progress to be made. I've long reached my goals, and then replaced them with new ones that were far harder to achieve. I constantly stress about the fact that I'm not reaching these new goals as quickly and that it seems much more difficult to obtain. It's part of the journey, I think. The girls that can be in the fitness industry and live this kind of lifestyle and are stress-free are few and far between. You're constantly thinking about the next meal, macros, weight, measurements and work outs. Critiquing. The key is to try and be happy at every point at your journey.
Sometimes I like to sit back and put myself in the mindset of when I started. Think about my original goals and how far I've come. It helps to put stuff into perspective and you realize it isn't something to dress over as much. Check out Brittany Dawn Fitness (Youtube or IG) - she used to be overweight, then got super into fitness and started competing, and now just maintains and found complete happiness and confidence. She talks about balance all the time and how you create a lifestyle, not a diet or a goal.5 -
Sincerely a big thank you all for your support, tips and reassurance that I'm not alone and crazy about how I was feeling. I truly appreciate it!1
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peaceout_aly wrote: »Anyone else have issues when they have reached or are reaching their target weight?
When I started I honestly never thought I would actually reach my goal weight. I started at 244 with a goal of 140ish. Back in May I reached my goal of 140 and then kind of lost my way. I should have been excited, I did it! But I felt terrified. I didn't know what to do anymore. I have always been the heavy girl. Always trying to either lose weight and just not caring and gaining.
Looking back I see that I totally self sabotaged (twice) gaining 10lbs over the summer. Now I'm working my way back to my goal weight AGAIN and I don't want to fall back into old habits. I am very much an emotional and binge eater and have been working very hard to overcome and curb those habits. I don't understand why I'm so scared to reach my goal and stay there...
Anyone else stressing about reaching there goal?
If the 2011 version of me saw the 2017 version of me I probably would have not been able to believe it and would have said I had a "dream body." But all 2017 me sees is progress to be made. I've long reached my goals, and then replaced them with new ones that were far harder to achieve. I constantly stress about the fact that I'm not reaching these new goals as quickly and that it seems much more difficult to obtain. It's part of the journey, I think. The girls that can be in the fitness industry and live this kind of lifestyle and are stress-free are few and far between. You're constantly thinking about the next meal, macros, weight, measurements and work outs. Critiquing. The key is to try and be happy at every point at your journey.
Sometimes I like to sit back and put myself in the mindset of when I started. Think about my original goals and how far I've come. It helps to put stuff into perspective and you realize it isn't something to dress over as much. Check out Brittany Dawn Fitness (Youtube or IG) - she used to be overweight, then got super into fitness and started competing, and now just maintains and found complete happiness and confidence. She talks about balance all the time and how you create a lifestyle, not a diet or a goal.
I try to remember this, it's a great point. Especially being so near to goal or having reached your goal. The way to be happy is different for everyone but such a great mindset to have. I'm struggling with this now myself, I'm 5 lbs away from my goal and for a few weeks lost complete sight of what I was trying to accomplish and felt all over the place. These are just really vanity pounds and at the beginning (or even middle) of my journey, I would've been very happy to be the weight I'm at now. At any rate, I've reassessed and think part of my problem is that I'm very close to maintenance and experiencing all the feelings everyone else has mentioned. But maintenance can be very freeing I think!4
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