Your Doctor give it to you straight?

Vladaar
Vladaar Posts: 147 Member
edited November 22 in Health and Weight Loss
How many have had their doctor tell them they are obese and need to lose weight?

I rarely saw my old doctor, so I got a new doctor myself. I have had friends tell me that their doctor told them they were obese and they were skinnier than me at the time. Do you guys prefer "tough love" from the doctor telling you like it is, or do you think people should be adult enough to know their situation and not hear it from their doctor?

I would rather get the tough love and know that my doctor cares about my well being. I can understand if a doctor tells you something every time you see him, and you tell him yes I know but I don't care leave me alone about it. Perhaps, he or you should agree to part ways if it bothers you that much. What's your guys thoughts?
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Replies

  • GrumpyHeadmistress
    GrumpyHeadmistress Posts: 666 Member
    My doctor mentioned it to me once in an offhand way but never again.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Yes, in an offhand way too - 'you know you're obese, right?' - then ordered an EKG because I was at risk for heart disease because of my weight.

    The one I had before, who I didn't like, gave me the speech about how I needed to switch to whole grains and eat granola bars as snacks instead of other stuff...
  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
    edited October 2017
    my doctor never told me anything. Shes a great doc to. I lost 110 pounds so i must have needed to lose but my blood and all tests were perfect so i guess she never felt the need
  • Lois_1989
    Lois_1989 Posts: 6,410 Member
    Some people live in ignorance and need to be told from an authoritative figure to get their butts in gear.

    My doctor has told me I need to lose weight a couple of times, but I rarely need to go to the doctor so it could only have been 2 or 3 times in the last 6-7 years?
  • mitch16
    mitch16 Posts: 2,113 Member
    My doctor did. I wasn't obese, but she said to me (after an EKG), "you have the heart of an athlete. The body, not so much." She was trained in Germany and very pragmatic, and I appreciated that. I had been here on mfp for a while before that, but it was her prodding that made me redouble my efforts. We've since moved and I have yet to find a doctor that I like as much as I did her--surprising since we live in a much larger metropolitan area now.
  • maura_tasi
    maura_tasi Posts: 196 Member
    If you're at an unhealthy weight I do believe it's part of your general practitioner's job to tell you so. Being at an unhealthy weight can propose many health issues- they aren't just telling you from an aesthetic standpoint. I'm not obese, but at my last yearly appointments recently my doctor did ask if I had any concerns about My weight. I told her yes I'm looking to lose this last 20-25lbs and that was that. I'm sure she didn't say anything about it following my response because my weight was down 20lbs from my last appointment so it's evident I was doing something right. I work in the medical field and many of the doctors I work with only ever bring up weight to a patient in an attempt to educate about the risks they're putting themselves at- physical health and mental health wise
  • busyPK
    busyPK Posts: 3,788 Member
    My doctor I've been seeing for 10 years hasn't said anything. All the labs/tests/bp/etc. are great so maybe that is why. She did say great job when I lost 30lbs about 2 years ago.
  • sssgilbe
    sssgilbe Posts: 89 Member
    After a loss of 27 pounds. my doc asked how I did it. When I said "Tracking on My Fitness Pal", he replied, "Yeah, tracking is the only thing that works long term."

    Then I got cocky, stopped tracking and gained 17 pounds. Back here for the 3rd time and for life.
  • hydechildcare
    hydechildcare Posts: 142 Member
    I would rather have a doctor tell me how it is. I have been to many doctors over the years. I know that I need to loose weight but I felt like nothing was working. They never said anything. My last doctor, she point me to here, told me about my weight. We talked I showed her my APP I was losing and the amount of calories. She told me to eat more that I was eating too little and that is why I would binge so much. Put my on a milt-vitamin that honestly helps with some of the craving and over eating. A work out plan. I am 2.5 months in the longest I have stuck with a plan. Best thing that ever happen a doctor telling me I was overweight and if I planned on having kids I really needed to work on my health.
  • mitch16
    mitch16 Posts: 2,113 Member
    edited October 2017
    Although... Thinking about this more... There is a right way and wrong way to go about this. Like I said, I appreciated the candor of my physician and it worked within our relationship.

    On the other hand, there's my mother, who has been overweight her entire adult life (was nearly always doing Weight Watchers when I was a teen) but is now getting up there in years (>70). I would estimate that her BMI is in the 28-29 range; so overweight, not obese. My mom has a history of autoimmune disease and is dealing with my dad's cancer diagnosis right now. She's under a ton of stress, and we are stress eaters. She knows and I know it's not healthy, but I'm giving her a little bit of a compassionate pass. Anyways, she presented with high liver enzymes and one of her doctors told her that it was NASH because she was fat. No other explanation, no tact around it. Simply that she was fat, and spoken rather rudely, too. She came away from that appointment very upset, and worked on trying to lose weight. Flash forward a few months, and all of the stress has caused my mom's autoimmune hemolytic anemia to act up. She was put on a huge dose of prednisone (ugh!) for over a year. This didn't do much to help the weight issues or her stress issues... but after a year of prednisone her liver enzymes were back to normal--it wasn't NASH, but autoimmune in nature. She's lost some weight, too, along the way.

    I guess what I am saying, is that context and the patient-doctor relationship is very important in these discussions. She never did go back to that doctor--she found another one who treated her with a little more respect and compassion.
  • animatorswearbras
    animatorswearbras Posts: 1,001 Member
    edited October 2017
    At the beginning of this year when I was overweight (but only a BMI of 25.5) and was diagnosed with PCOS and pre diabetic my doctor told me she wanted to see me lose at least a stone because I put my weight on my stomach (stomach measurement was in the obese category) and she ideally wanted me in the middle of the healthy BMI scale. It gave me a kick up the bum from half heartedly wanting to lose some (what I thought was) vanity weight to actually taking it seriously.

    My doctor wasn't rude but also she didn't beat around the bush and spoke to me like an adult, basically "you have this diagnosis and being overweight exacerbates the condition, I can prescribe you medication but you will probably be able to get many of your symptoms under control just by losing weight and exercising frequently" she was pretty much right.

    I don't think doctors should feel like they have to shy away and the earlier they see weight related health problems the sooner they should say something. And people should realise this is a doctor they're talking too, they're not trying to make you feel bad about yourself they are just diagnosing a health issue. x

    EDIT: However I do agree that doctors shouldn't use emotive language, so overweight rather than fat. Fat sounds like such a superficial word and is commonly used as an insult compared to overweight which sounds clinical/professional.
  • Keladelphia
    Keladelphia Posts: 820 Member
    When I was 100 pounds overweight I never had a doctor suggest that I lose weight (and i've seen many different ones). Even when I was overweight as a child and very overweight as a teen, my pediatrician would say things like "yes shes in the 98th percentile for weight but she doesn't look like the Michelin man so I wouldn't be concerned." I'm not saying the pediatrician should have told me to go on a diet as a child or anything but since I was always pretty self confident and medical professionals never seemed concerned from the first moment I was overweight I never really gave much thought to the impact obesity could have on my health.

    While I absolutely do not think they should harp on it on every visit, I think it's your primary care physicians responsibility to let you know how they lifestyle choices you are making can impact your health whether it's diet, alcohol, drugs etc.
  • iamunicoon
    iamunicoon Posts: 839 Member
    I have never had a doctor who wasn't honest about what's obvious anyway. I mean, c'mon, I'm in a place where I have to check if my weight will even be displayed when buying a new scale and until recently I always needed a belt extender in airplanes. I'm not delusional, I know this isn't a healthy place to be.

    Just recently, I had to undergo surgery for something that could have been done more easily if I wasn't obese and my doctor didn't lie about the facts, neither did the surgeon.

    On the other hand, they're never harsh or even rude about it. I don't think I'd play well with that. I prefer my doc to stick to facts and work with me based on that but if they gave me 'the talk' every time I mess up or even got a bit mean about it, that'd probably result in me avoiding them rather than seeking them out for advice / help.
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    I was never obese but if I had been I would certainly expect my doctor to say something. I wouldn't think much of any doctor that didn't mention a major health risk.
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  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    suzannesimmons3 wrote: »
    Vladaar wrote: »
    Sharon_C wrote: »
    My doctor told me I needed to lose 10 pounds. When I told him I count my calories and lift heavy weights he told me I was doing it all wrong and I needed to do more cardio. I haven't been back to him since and I'll be looking for a new doctor.

    Is that because you are training for competition of some sort? The reason I ask is because heavier weights tend to build muscle and muscle weighs more than fat. That is why I am guessing he told you that. However, heavier weights can be subjective so maybe your not going all that heavy and he was just trying to be Mr. know it all. There's nothing wrong with building some muscle. Personally, I was in the past very muscular pre-marriage and contemplating entering powerlift competitions but all that heavy weight injured my wrist. Now I lift again, but it's to get some strength back, going for an athletic build and maintain it as opposed to trying to get really into the bigger, stronger game again.

    Muscle doesn't weigh more than fat.

    False statement without mentioning amounts.
  • Jruzer
    Jruzer Posts: 3,501 Member
    I prefer the straight truth, even when it hurts.

    But I could swear that I have read, on these forums, people complaining that their doctors called them fat. "He doesn't have to tell me, I already know!" "She doesn't have to rub it in!"
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
    To me it didn't hurt one bit. It's because I knew I was fat so it basically clicked "he's right, fat means I have the power to influence my conditions, that's good news"
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    Here's a good (longish) thread on Debates::

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10595842/does-your-doctor-comment-on-your-weight/p1
  • Sharon_C
    Sharon_C Posts: 2,132 Member
    Vladaar wrote: »
    Sharon_C wrote: »
    My doctor told me I needed to lose 10 pounds. When I told him I count my calories and lift heavy weights he told me I was doing it all wrong and I needed to do more cardio. I haven't been back to him since and I'll be looking for a new doctor.

    Is that because you are training for competition of some sort? The reason I ask is because heavier weights tend to build muscle and muscle weighs more than fat. That is why I am guessing he told you that. However, heavier weights can be subjective so maybe your not going all that heavy and he was just trying to be Mr. know it all. There's nothing wrong with building some muscle. Personally, I was in the past very muscular pre-marriage and contemplating entering powerlift competitions but all that heavy weight injured my wrist. Now I lift again, but it's to get some strength back, going for an athletic build and maintain it as opposed to trying to get really into the bigger, stronger game again.

    Muscle does not weigh more than fat. One pound of muscle weighs the same as one pound of fat.

    And he never asked me how heavy but my husband told him I could bench press him.
  • Aerona85
    Aerona85 Posts: 159 Member
    The first time (back in college) my doctor asked me what I was doing to lose weight. I think to make sure I was doing things healthfully. This time, now that I am older I guess, my weight loss has caused a number of health issues (thyroid goes into freefall, sodium is super low, dizzy, and hair is falling out—down about 50 percent in the last 3 months).

    So now weight is a constant topic, and since thyroid is a major issue I’m getting blood work and seeing doctor at least 4 times a year, more at the moment). We agree I should lose another 50 pounds or so but it is going to take a long time since my body is throwing a tantrum. Currently her orders are maintenance until we can get things back in balance and then will ease down 100 cals or so at a time until finding tolerance level. Blood pressure is low due to the low sodium and probably the hormone imbalances affect it too. But I have never had high blood pressure in my life either. On the plus side, all of my other blood work is good—cholesterol, blood sugar, liver and kidney function, adrenal function, etc.



  • dwilliamca
    dwilliamca Posts: 325 Member
    My previous doctor called me obese at about 170 pounds (overweight but not obese for me) and rather than being a wake-up call it ticked me off. He was obnoxious in other ways as well and I eventually changed doctors about 10 years ago. My new doc is a D.O. and like his demeanor better. He did eventually tell me I should look into losing weight after I hit 190 and I did. That is when I lost 30 lbs. Now I put it back on I don't want to see him until I'm at least back where I started. Sometimes it is not what they say, but how they say it.
  • nndarden
    nndarden Posts: 16 Member
    Yes, he gave it to me straight. He said I was old and fat and if I didn't get my stuff together I'd die a painful and lingering death. And he didn't want to fight it with pills because I was too lazy to get off my butt and take the necessary steps to get back on track.
  • Maxxitt
    Maxxitt Posts: 1,281 Member
    The nurse practitioner I went to see to follow up after being diagnosed with sleep apnea was kind and direct about my needing to lose weight. I checked back in with her a year or so later after I had lost about 50# to thank her, and let her know she had delivered the right message at the right time. I was also hoping to be able to lose the cpap but that was not to be. Oh well :)
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