Irritated...

Stagezz
Stagezz Posts: 124 Member
edited September 30 in Motivation and Support
Here is the story...

I have a younger sister, her and I both battle our weight, we always have. I am 5'8 and she might be 5'4...I currently weight 207 and she is about 270. (you can see us in my profile pic)

Anyway...I bust my but with a personal trainer, going to the gym on my own, dvd's, swimming, watching everything I eat...seems I never lose a pound...but I get up the next day and try again. My husband is absolutly no support...he doesn't work out or do anything type of workout...god i wish he did but that is another topic.

Her Fiancee, is built...he works out 7 days a week, trains for marathons, supports her everytime she talks about dieting. He even does some personal training...Instead of taking advantage of it she goes to McDonalds, eats tubs of ice cream, has dunkin donuts everyday...you get the point. Her mom is a personal trainer too!

She was recently approved for lapband surgery...to me this is so unfair...why should she get to take the easy way out???

Yes I understand losing the weight will be better for her health and all of that, I am happy for her. I think just knowing how hard I work and can't get below 200 pounds KILLS ME!

Ok Rant over...

Replies

  • Chairless
    Chairless Posts: 583 Member
    Your frustration at the situation is understandable.
  • AMSalaz
    AMSalaz Posts: 16
    I feel irritated for you! It's rough when you know you are busting butt to achieve and others bust butt sitting on a couch and then take "the easy way out."

    But it seems you have a good tool at your hands - talk to her fiance and see what you can do differently to see the results you want. Nothing wrong with that - he's family now.

    Keep on the path to a healthier life! You have all our support!
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
    It's just like the turtle and the hare story.. Slow and Steady Wins the Race.

    I applaud you for what your doing.. I have a personal trainer too, and they are not easy and they do kick your *kitten* into high gear!

    Keep at it girl.. eventually things will happen.
  • H_Factor
    H_Factor Posts: 1,722 Member
    lap band surgery is not the easy way out. Your sister will have to work after the surgery to reap its full benefits...otherwise, she'll be back to where she started at some point. and, as you suggested, you are doing things the healthier way. despite the scale not cooperating, you are improving your overall fitness which will be a great thing when it comes to reducing risk of disease later in life.

    as far as not seeing the results you should be seeing, you might want to read some articles on diet and nutrition and possibly change some things up to better maximize your results from all of the hard work.
  • mill1295
    mill1295 Posts: 120 Member
    I can see your frustration.. but you are trying to lose weight the healthy way, not take the easy way out. That surgery is quite risky and should really be a last resort. A woman at my work had the surgery and lost a lot of weight but the results didn't last and she is going the other direction again. Even if your sister loses weight initially if she don't adopt the good habits of eating well and exercising it is unlikely the results will last. If you continue to work hard your results will last. I agree maybe talk to your BIL and see if he can give you any advice. Losing weight is about being healthy in addition to being skinny so if you eat well you will be healthy and feel good! Good luck! Keep the faith!
  • cheeksv
    cheeksv Posts: 521 Member
    You will make it and feel more satisfied. Just bc she is getting that surgery does not mean she is going to become a skinny mini she is going to have to work for it just like you. Keep your head up and we are all here for you even if hubby is not. Maybe once he sees you becoming more fit then he will join? If not think of it as a personal hobby . We all need time away from our spouses every once in a while haha. Good luck!
  • jatcat310
    jatcat310 Posts: 63
    Your irritation is justified and I feel for you. I think you should pick her fiance's brain, I am sure as a personal trainer he will be more than happy to help you knowing you want to better yourself and get in shape. With her eating habits and lifestyle, lap band is going to be really hard for her. I know people who have had it and the lifestyle change can be traumatic.

    YOU ARE DOING IT THE HEALTHY WAY and that is all that matters, so don't worry about her at this point, just support her and what she is doing but focus on yourself.
  • Kristin111365
    Kristin111365 Posts: 77
    First weight loss surgury is not an easy way out. It is a tool to help with hunger issues, she is still going to have to count calories and workout to lose the weight. At her weight and height she may not be able to workout as hard as you do.

    It sounds like you are more upset with the fact that her boyfriend is a better support than your husband. Just remember the way you are losing weight is a life style change , she hasent changed her life so she may or may not lose weight and keep it off. You on the other hand will lose the weight and keep it off because you have worked so hard to make changes.

    Be happy that she is doing something and be each others cheerleaders. My sisters and friends are my biggest cheerleaders during this time.
  • kezzavt
    kezzavt Posts: 13
    Go ahead and rant, that's what this is for. You're frustration may surprise you that you're not alone in your feelings toward other's getting a "lucky break". It's not as simple as that. And deep down I think you understand that and your sister needs your support.
    Love her, cheer her on and let her know no matter what you'll be by her side. She's incredibly scared. It is her life on the line.

    For you...BOY oh boy do I understand your hair pulling anger about exercising to kill yourself and not see results.
    I'm suprised you person trainer didn't explain the benefit of interval training. just 20 minutes two times a week will make a HUGE difference in how your body respondes to fitness and weight loss. Plus remember 100 calorie fruit salad is NOT the same as 100 calorie cookie. Your body breaks and stores these foods way differently.

    While I am once again hitting the weight loss train and fitness coaster, please understand I have spent HOURS learning the new and more helpful way to get my life back on track. I picked up on your note in that I am just as frustrated as you with similar things happening in my life.

    That all being said, I'm going to pass along a web link for you to read. Its the article that got me thinking on the right track to health. And I AM giving it a whirl. It's going to be a long road and I'll keep learning. I hope this helps you find your answers and peace of mind. Good Luck to you!
    http://fitness.mercola.com/sites/fitness/archive/2010/06/26/10-minutes-of-exercise-yields-hourlong-effects.aspx
  • gingerfoxxx
    gingerfoxxx Posts: 267 Member
    When people take the easy road, it catches up to them eventually. Keep busting your *kitten* and it WILL pay off.....tenfold! I would be irritated too...If only she shared your determination!
  • LizabethRose
    LizabethRose Posts: 27
    Totally understand your frustration! I wish I could get that too...but statistics say that if there is a good chance she will end right back where she is. For instance, last year I went on this fab diet, went to see a doctor that put me on that phen drug...I lost 20 pounds in 4 months...a year later....I've gained back the 20 plus 10 more!! Not to mention what that stuff did to my heart...have had a trip to the ER and an echo done since. Never again. That's why I'm trying this now...and it's not going fast at all...but I know that if I keep on trying, changing my lifestyle...eventually, I'll be there. And I'm sure you will too :)
  • ken1994
    ken1994 Posts: 495 Member
    Do not let the frustration you feel for the barrier in front of you consume your purpose. Focus on the 200lbs mark and busting though it, I think you will find that is a better angle and support your sister! Good luck to you.
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