Help Motivate My Mom for me?
bobbybdoe
Posts: 472 Member
So my mom has been overweight ever since she had my sister and I about 17 years ago. She got interested in doing the 30 Day Shred by JM a couple months ago but stopped suddenly. I was just speaking to her about exercise a few days ago and I asked her why she stopped exercising. She said "It didn't do anything for me at all".
Me :
So I told her weight loss is nothing without diet. And she said that "she was eating healthy".
Drinking Slim Fast on days she didn't workout on, eating popcorn as soon as she gets home (she blames it on anemia), bringing home cupcakes, and desserts from Starbucks.
So now, I'm telling her to try it again (with diet) and then she says "it's not made for me. Search for an exercise program made for overweight people over 50."
I suggested TurboJam, 30DS, TurboFire, and P90X Lean but she kept saying everything was too intense (like she's just TRYING to not to be healthy").
Can any of you ladies (or older guys) give your success stories, and tell me exactly what you did with your diets? It's just sad seeing my mom miserable all the time and always being lazy when it comes to getting healthy.
I'll show her this thread to help motivate her. (Btw, I already asked her to join MFP)
Me :
So I told her weight loss is nothing without diet. And she said that "she was eating healthy".
Drinking Slim Fast on days she didn't workout on, eating popcorn as soon as she gets home (she blames it on anemia), bringing home cupcakes, and desserts from Starbucks.
So now, I'm telling her to try it again (with diet) and then she says "it's not made for me. Search for an exercise program made for overweight people over 50."
I suggested TurboJam, 30DS, TurboFire, and P90X Lean but she kept saying everything was too intense (like she's just TRYING to not to be healthy").
Can any of you ladies (or older guys) give your success stories, and tell me exactly what you did with your diets? It's just sad seeing my mom miserable all the time and always being lazy when it comes to getting healthy.
I'll show her this thread to help motivate her. (Btw, I already asked her to join MFP)
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Replies
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Maybe try the old Richard Simmons exercise videos. Those are great for those looking for lower impact. And Weight Watchers has been a life saver for me!0
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I am 56 years old. I started on MFP in December recording, weighing and measuring EVERYTHING I put in my mouth. It really opened my eyes to what I was eating, portion size, etc. I started off on the treadmill. In the beginning I could only do a couple of minutes - THAT is how out of shape I was. I slowly worked up to more time, faster, more incline, etc.
I have lost 36 lbs, got my blood sugar back in the normal range and lowered my blood pressure and cholesterol. Your mom has to WANT to do it. I had a defining moment when the doctor told me I need to go on diabetes meds. THAT made up my mind.
Good luck with your mom!
Mary0 -
See if she would be interested in Tae Kwan Do. My kids just started doing it and they are getting a great workout in addition to learning a new language, discipline, focus, and working towards a goal. I am thinking of getting in to it. There is a 60 year old lady in my daughter's class that is having a blast doing it, she said she feels stronger and more confident about herself since beginning. Check it out!0
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The exercise program's you suggested are too intense for someone her age that hasn't been exercising (I'm not saying anyone he age can't do it). What about Zumba? It's more like dancing and having fun than working out. She does need to concentrate on eating better. It is 80% nutrition and 20% exercise to get the weight off.0
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If she doesn't want to get fit, then the only thing you can do is be a good example for her. If she's honestly wanting to do it, then have her do mfp, and get her to start walking after work, or in the mornings. Leslie Sansone's dvd's may be a good workout for her.0
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Also, is your mom a member here? If not, encourage her to join and keep a daily food and exercise diary. It REALLY helped me.
Mary0 -
Maybe a walking program? I have seen some reference to walking DVD's, though not sure of the name off the top of my head. I'm not over 50, but my mom is wanting to increase her activity levels and get healthier, and so we've been encouraging her to walk, which she's really enjoying. My dad picked her up some Nordic walking sticks at a clearance place (she was having some stability/balance issues) which also help increase the workout.
Sometimes people don't really understand nutrition, and what is healthy. My mom was a nurse, and is diabetic, has been to dieticians for years, but only really learned to read labels in the last year or so. And you also have to keep in mind that although you really want her to get healthy, this has to be her choice and she has to find her own motivation to really stick with it. Which is not to say you can't sit down and talk to her about your concerns. All the best to you both!0 -
I am 44 turning 45 in November. When I started my journey, in mid May, I weighed 216. I document everything I eat and drink, even when I don't want to. You can feel free to go back and look at my diary( this last weekend I was out of town and really splurged so you may not want to peak at that...lol) The only exercise I have done to this point is walking on the treadmill. When I first started I could hardly make it 15 minutes. My knees hurt, I was out of breath, and it felt as if my heart was going to blow out of my chest. Now I have doubled my calories lost walking on the treadmill and have lost 37lbs. I feel great!! Still have a ways to go and would like to incorporate toning exercises for my arms and tummy. That is my next move. It can be done. We are not too old nor too out of shape to lose weight and feel great! I hope your mother will start her own journey to fitness and weight loss. She will not regret it!0
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I think everyone has already said, your Mom has to want this for herself. All you can do be an example that she can follow.0
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56 Year Old Guy Here: Those programs you mentioned might be good programs, but for most 50-plus people, they're simply too drastic. Why don't you just suggest walking and do it with her? Between MFP and walking, I lost 6 lbs in the 1st 3 weeks.
But honestly. The motivation has to come from within.
Also, with regard to those snacks (and, OH, aren't they yummy??) - she grew up with parents who came out of the depression when scrimp and save and go without were the norm. So. That is how many of us 50-plusers grew up. However, when we were the ones making/spending the money, things were generally much better, so we treat ourselves to alot of foods that we couldn't/didn't have as kids. It wouldn't surprise me if your mom - at least subconsciously - feels like giving up her treats is to return to those days when she didn't have control over what foods were brought into the house / stomach / taste buds. Why not make tasty low calorie suggestions to replace what she needs to cut back on? To replace - rather the cut treats out altogether - will be much easier for her to cope with.
Oh, and as a friend of mine (who's also on MFP) said: Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels!!0 -
So my mom has been overweight ever since she had my sister and I about 17 years ago. She got interested in doing the 30 Day Shred by JM a couple months ago but stopped suddenly. I was just speaking to her about exercise a few days ago and I asked her why she stopped exercising. She said "It didn't do anything for me at all".
Me :
So I told her weight loss is nothing without diet. And she said that "she was eating healthy".
Drinking Slim Fast on days she didn't workout on, eating popcorn as soon as she gets home (she blames it on anemia), bringing home cupcakes, and desserts from Starbucks.
So now, I'm telling her to try it again (with diet) and then she says "it's not made for me. Search for an exercise program made for overweight people over 50."
I suggested TurboJam, 30DS, TurboFire, and P90X Lean but she kept saying everything was too intense (like she's just TRYING to not to be healthy").
Can any of you ladies (or older guys) give your success stories, and tell me exactly what you did with your diets? It's just sad seeing my mom miserable all the time and always being lazy when it comes to getting healthy.
I'll show her this thread to help motivate her. (Btw, I already asked her to join MFP)
MY mom will kill me if she sees this (and she's totally on MFP, she's why I am on MFP)!
My mom is 52, and overweight and doing 30DS and kicking it's BUTT! I don't know how much she's lost but whenever I go home and see her I can tell a difference (I'm so proud of you, MOM!!!) Sadly, your mom needs to want it, you can't want it for her, no matter how much you want it for her.
Have you tried to do it WITH your mom? When I started running I called my mom before every run and I called her after my run. We are doing a challenge together this month (Go Team Zombies Don't Eat Cupcakes! WOO!) and we text each other before and after each daily challenge and it is something that keeps me connected to my mom, and I LOVE it, and I know my mom is really enjoying it too!0 -
My mom is in her 50's and she likes doing the Walk Away the Pounds dvd's...she has an entire series!
They aren't bad!
She also enjoys Zumba for Wii!0 -
I totally get wanting Mom to be more fit and healthy - above all else, you love her very much and want her to be around as long as possible. Not only that, but if she's living long, you want her to be mobile and active and happy! I'm right there with you...
However, you need to work with her a bit. If she tells you that 30DS isn't right for her, it's time to find something more age appropriate (in her opinion). Sure, she could probably do it but let's start small and work up to the Jillian MIchaels level. Jillian tells you right in the warm up of Level 1 that there are no low impact options (that's not the word she uses but I can't think of it at the moment) and to someone just starting out who may have knee or hip issues, that's tough to hear.
A couple of folks have suggested other videos. I'd like to add in Hip Hop Abs and Walk Away the Pounds - both are great and are either fairly low impact or have low impact options and they're fun too! Something else she can do, if possible, is get out and walk. It's a great way to burn calories and she can go with friends or by herself and just wander around. See if there are any senior fitness classes in her area - my Mom goes to one and they do some pretty impressive moves (side plank, lunges, etc). Or how about swimming or water aerobics?
PBS has shown a couple of shows during their pledge weeks for seniors - Yoga for the Rest of Us with Peggy Crappy and Firming after 50 with Joel Harper - both seem to be very good.
Your Mom can do this, she just need to go at her own pace and figure out what works best for her. Trust me, nagging won't help, just be gently encouraging and remind her of all that stuff I wrote in the 1st paragraph. Good luck!0 -
See if she would be interested in Tae Kwan Do. My kids just started doing it and they are getting a great workout in addition to learning a new language, discipline, focus, and working towards a goal. I am thinking of getting in to it. There is a 60 year old lady in my daughter's class that is having a blast doing it, she said she feels stronger and more confident about herself since beginning. Check it out!0
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Thanks for all the awesome suggestions everybody. 30DS isn't hard for her. She did the first 2 weeks no problem. But then she gets lazy, starts skipping days, and was never even eating right to begin with and then she wonders why she didn't even see any results on the scale... I'll try to talk to her about Tae Kwan Do, but knowing her she's going to use the "I'm tired excuse", even if she sees the people her age are doing it...0
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I'm also interested in the responses that you get to this! My parents are both overweight & with health issues. I also have trouble convincing my mom especially that MFP could work for her and that even a short daily walk would be beneficial to her.0
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I'm a 53-year-old who joined MFP in February, so I'm just shy of six months in.
When I signed on I was pretty skeptical; I committed to losing just 1/2 lb. a week and no exercise. Zero. Just by tracking everything I ate, I was down 3 lbs. in 5 days -- and completely hooked.
Oh, the things I've learned! From how much I was eating (way, way over recommended serving sizes) to how much sodium and fat is in everything to the perils of fast food (I used to live on it) ... every single thing I think about food has changed, and all for the better.
It quickly became evident that tracking what I ate was a big deal for me. I'm competitive, so I didn't like the idea of going over my "assigned calories" much. About a month in, I went for my first walk in YEARS. I think I managed to last about 20 minutes (literally) and was truly and completely whipped when I was done. But I tried again a few days later, and a couple days after that, and a couple days after that. Last week my walk lasted 1 hr 45 min. -- and I didn't need to take a break at all. (Still blows my mind.)
That being said, your mom has to get it in HER head that she (and only she) can make it happen. I firmly believe that getting my head in the right place was key to my success so far -- and what will take me all the way through.
If Mom joins us -- I'll be delighted to be an MFP pal.0 -
56 Year Old Guy Here: Those programs you mentioned might be good programs, but for most 50-plus people, they're simply too drastic. Why don't you just suggest walking and do it with her? Between MFP and walking, I lost 6 lbs in the 1st 3 weeks.
But honestly. The motivation has to come from within.
Also, with regard to those snacks (and, OH, aren't they yummy??) - she grew up with parents who came out of the depression when scrimp and save and go without were the norm. So. That is how many of us 50-plusers grew up. However, when we were the ones making/spending the money, things were generally much better, so we treat ourselves to alot of foods that we couldn't/didn't have as kids. It wouldn't surprise me if your mom - at least subconsciously - feels like giving up her treats is to return to those days when she didn't have control over what foods were brought into the house / stomach / taste buds. Why not make tasty low calorie suggestions to replace what she needs to cut back on? To replace - rather the cut treats out altogether - will be much easier for her to cope with.
Oh, and as a friend of mine (who's also on MFP) said: Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels!!
love your words here and sooooooooooooooo true
good luck to your mom--reading this post has motivated me totally0
This discussion has been closed.
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