100 pounds down ...If I can do it, so can you...

in 2014, i woke up one day and said 'i'm done'. I was tired of being fat, I was tired of hurting, I was tired of being tired... I was done. At the time (as my long time friends on here know), I was caring for my husband, who was partially paralyzed due to a stroke (hes now deceased), was in a *kitten* marriage at that, and also caring for my grandparents in ailing health. I worked from home and had 2 kids. it wasn't a new year, it wasn't any particular date. Just a random day at some point where I ... was done. I didnt go crazy. I made small changes. mastered those, add more. so on and so on. I didnt make myself crazy by depriving myself of anything. If i ate too much one day. no biggie. its one day. if i ate too much one WEEK. okay, pull it in, Deb. And I did.

Three years brings lots of changes. My grandparents passed, I left my husband, then he passed, met a (usually lol) pretty amazing guy, and bought a new car, and then a new house with him. In a new state. I'm obviously an idiot, cause we're getting married in a few months. Glutton for punishment, I suppose

Over the past year, I have essentially maintained my weight. Havent logged much, exercised even less - time and life and stuff gets in the way for all of us. But .... I never STOPPED. I maintained. I didnt GAIN. That, in itself, is an accomplishment, especially for not tracking or logging or doing anything than intuitive eating and continuing to make the same food and portion choices I had trained myself to do.

And then, today, for whatever reason. Maybe its life settling back down, maybe it's just that time, whatever .... but I came to the realization that I almost to my goal. I started at 280 pounds. I am at 180. I ONLY have 50 more pounds to go. After losing 100, 50.... is not a scary number. and if i get to 130, nothing will happen its a number. the gravitational relation of my body mass to the Earth. And if i dont get to that number, thats okay too. it is, just a number. That number has no relation on my happiness, my self worth, my intelligence, sense of humor, or how much my fiance loves or wants me. But for ME, I have learned, if i want to lose at the rate I PREFER (and with the amount i still have to lose)... I have to workout. Ive MISSED it. not only for weight loss, but also for how it makes me FEEL. So, signed up at the gym today.

And this, my friends... especially my NEW friends, who are just starting and who are or will get discouraged (we ALL do).... is how its done. its a lifestyle change. not a 'im never eating ice cream or pizza again' change. Not coming up with some meticulous workout plan that youll never stick to. Not living off the same bland foods day after day. Its learning how MUCH to eat, period. Its moving MORE. period. Its WEIGHING your food on a scale to the point where it becomes habit and second nature. its knowing you CAN eat what you want - fast food, restaurants, alcohol ... you just have to PLAN for it.

Because if *I* can do this. If *I* can lose ONE HUNDRED *kitten* POUNDS..... you can too. Whether your goal is 5, or 300. Its easy to do, but it does take dedication and self accountability. It takes TIME. None of us got fat overnight. it took months, YEARS. You will NOT lose it quickly. And heres the thing ... the SLOWER you lose it, the more likely you are to KEEP it off. And thats the goal, isnt it? To KEEP the weight off. You dont have to cook yourself separate meals. My fiance needs to GAIN weight (the *kitten*). I give HIM more. larger portions, more dressing, more butter on his bread, etc. I give ME less. but we eat the SAME food. Its not rocket science.

I did it. I am DOING it. So can YOU. Hang in there.