Co-worker thought I was pregnant...
randomgirl913
Posts: 12 Member
Today while I was at work, a co-worker came up to me and asked if I had any news to share. I asked her what she meant and then I realized that she meant that she thought I was pregnant.
didn't say anything after that and I just pretended to have no idea what she was talking about, because I actually didn't want her to be embarrassed or something.
To be fair, I have gained 35 pounds in the year and a half I've been working there (McDonald's, go figure) and 20 of that has been since the spring this year. Also, uniforms can be tight showing everything you don't want. But still. I've fallen off the wagon and have problems binging at night and depression tends to take away my motivation. So this is really frustrating.
didn't say anything after that and I just pretended to have no idea what she was talking about, because I actually didn't want her to be embarrassed or something.
To be fair, I have gained 35 pounds in the year and a half I've been working there (McDonald's, go figure) and 20 of that has been since the spring this year. Also, uniforms can be tight showing everything you don't want. But still. I've fallen off the wagon and have problems binging at night and depression tends to take away my motivation. So this is really frustrating.
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Replies
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I'm sorry hun. I've been there. Had someone I work with come up to me in the bathroom and was like "congratulations, must be nice to be pregnant with everyone else" (there were three people pregnant in my office at the time. I just said, nope, just fat and kept moving. It was annoying, I was annoyed, but I just said f this and kept going with my life. now I am losing weight, and I just ignore it. if you are upset by it, do something about it and prove yourself to you. Find what makes you feel good, and if you are comfortable with your weight now, embrace it. if not, change it.1
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Dave Berry said it best: “You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.”
Unfortunately people don't always follow good judgement. Sorry that happened. Hopefully it wasn't meant to be mean and was just a "open mount, insert foot" type moment.
Treat your depression. Be kind to yourself. If you want to lose weight, work toward that goal.4 -
My sister in law’s grandmother is rude, blunt, always has to be right and did I mention rude?!? She came up to me at my niece’s birthday and asked if I was pregnant. When I told her a simple no for an answer, she began to question if I was sure because I really looked like I was pregnant (as her eyes were scrolling up and down my belly). I still remember her face with this “yeah you’re definitely pregnant” look. I just looked at her and bluntly said “I’m positive I’m not pregnant” and walked away. Now I know my stomach sticks out past my boobs, but mind you HERS DOES TOO. She is old and in her 70’s so I didn’t point that out to her or ask if she was pregnant and stare at her stomach like she did mine because I’m not rude. Some women just carry their weight in their stomach. This was after I had my son and before I knew that I had two large fibroids in my uterus the size of a babies head so yeah my stomach potruded. People are just inconsiderate whether they mean to be or not. I was so angry that day but I’ve learned to accept my body. It’s been through a lot and it’s not perfect but it’s mine and brought two kids into this world. I am trying to change how it looks but until then, I just ignore any rude comments.
Also don’t let those comments be a factor in falling off the wagon. Don’t let someone else’s comments dictate that for you. Just be strong and keep going. If you slip up, just get back on track.1 -
I have been the douche on the other side. I was talking to a friend's wife and that was always awkward...we were polite to one another, but we never connected. This made me nervous whenever I was left alone with her...I never knew what to say. She started telling me that she can't drink anymore, and I stupidly jumped in and asked how far along she was...the pain in eyes told me that I had goofed. I did apologize and resisted the urge to get up and run. Needless to say that conversation was difficult. But after a few minutes we were able to move on to another topic. When she did get pregnant she came over and offered some good-natured ribbing. I had it coming so I ate it all. Now, I don't say a word, no matter how obvious it might look to me. My point here, is while some comments do come from a dark place, others are borne out of ignorance and may be well intended. But both need to be addressed with an apology if the result is pain.11
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I've been told that twice. The first time I was too shocked to say anything but the guy realized he messed up and literally slapped himself. I felt awful about myself for weeks while my husband tried to convince me it was only because of the flowy shirt I wore that day (and haven't worn since). The second time I shot the person the "death-look" and said "No, I'm just fat," and walked away. Pretty sure she felt worse than I did at that point, and I bet she won't make that mistake again! Maybe it's immature but I'll admit I got over it a lot faster that time.1
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It's happened to me too, like Moxie42 I was wearing a flowy shirt. The main thing is, you can't keep gaining 20 lbs a year, that's awful for your health and well being. I can imagine that working around fast food makes it hard to stick to a good eating plan and depression makes it harder. If there's anything we can do to help you get back on the wagon, let us know!1
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maybe this can be a catalyst for you to fix it. just be consistent with your diet and give yourself a few months and you can see tremendous change.3
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I’ve had that happen to me. I said “Yeah it’s a food baby, I’m going to give birth to a cake” or something like that, and laughed it off. The poor woman really thought I was pregnant and she apologized, and I could tell she felt uncomfortable. She laughed with me because I did. But it truly hurt me to my core. It made me look at myself more critically, which maybe is a good thing, but it really hurt.2
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Some people are stupid. This says everything about her and nothing about you.1
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Been there done that numerous times. I've been asked if "I'm expecting" numerous times. Have gotten rude and awkward comments about it from the time I was 16 or so. I suppose you (and others here) understand how devastating that can be when you aren't pregnant and aren't planning to be pregnant.
Have to agree with those saying that it says everything about the busybody asking you insensitive questions instead of saying anything about yourself.
As for the motivation due to depression? Yeah, that's a tough one. I had to buckle down and finally go back on medication to "see the light", as it were. I don't advocate that as a first stop, but if it's where you need to go to get back on track, don't dismiss it. If it's depression in which you think talking to someone might help, that's what I would try first. There are also certain diets (mostly foods to avoid) and things like walking that help a lot of people out.
P.S. I used to work at a Subway and totally understand what you mean about the uniforms being really tight fitting and showing all the parts you don't want others seeing, lol.1 -
I’m sorry you had to experience that too. I especially chuckle at the fact of people who are adamant that we do not know our own body and must be pregnant. I had this happen to me a few times this year. Like you, I have gained about 30lbs in a year from emotional eating and depression. My patient said I was pregnant. My coworkers were more rude. One literally said in the nurses station, “You gained weight.” I looked like I wanted to kill her. The second coworker suggested, “You’re getting thick.” My aunt literally said, “You’re fat!” I was so hurt, ashamed, and embarrassed! It’s one of the things stopping me from giving in to the urge to binge eat today. Like @brdnw said, I’m using it as the catalyst to a new way of life. The urge to binge has come upon me, even as I sleep, but I will not give in as much as I may want to- I will not. It’s like 10 days now and I’m just taking it one day at a time. You can too!2
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