Trainer Professionalism & nutrition

sdancer2017

Thank you in advance for any feedback.
I respect my trainer's knowledge & the way he corrects my form. I attend strength training classes 3-5 times per week.
I was measured the Mon before Thanksgiving (last week). This week, he told me I need to be measured again. When I said no, because it was a rough week w the holiday & hormonal changes, that we should stick to our 2 week measurement schedule, he said we have to because I need "more accountability. "
I've had several other conversations about what I need from a trainer & discussed switching trainers. However, he's the owner & I also don't want to break contract.

I cannot seem to curb my eating a particular week during the month.

I know I need to work harder to reach my body fat goal of 18% (currently 24%).

All that said, please share any tips on any of the following:
1) how to manage that delimma each month
2) is it ok to tell my trainer I want to stick to measurements every 2 weeks. Or am I totally off base here?
3) any tips on managing hunger after burning 600-700 calories in a workout
4) what can I do to maintain a good, professional relationship with this trainer?

Replies

SonyaCele

i am not sure what the issue is, the fact you can't curb your eating and need to work harder? or being measured. Being measured is pretty insignificant, its just a measurement, you dont even have to look at the number, in a year from now that measurement wont even matter. Its not worth stressing over. But If the issue is that you go off track and he's holding you accountable... well. .. you gotta sort that one out with yourself .

SCoil123

Measuring every 2 weeks should be fine. If that’s what you are wanting say that. Remember, you are paying him for a service. This is about you and your fitness journey and it is his job to help you reach your goals in a way that works for you.

maryannprt

You're paying the man for a service, one you say you trust him to perform. I would try it his way, at least for a few weeks, you are paying him for guidance. If you feel it's too much pressure and you need to write off a week a month, you can do that after trying it. It might actually give you (and him) some useful information about what to expect from your cycle. Does he charge you extra for taking measurements?

sdancer2017

Thank you. No he doesn't charge. And he says that none of his clients have ever talked about challenges related to hormones. That I am just slacking & making excuses. Every 2 week measurement we've had I've lost either inches or maintained my measurements.

I just really need to get over this crappy eating hurdle. In Sept I started training at 26.5 % bf. I'm down to 24% (which that thing fluctuates up to a whole percentage within minutes).

sdancer2017

I mean he doesn't charge for measurements

SonyaCele

sdancer2017 wrote: »

Thank you. No he doesn't charge. And he says that none of his clients have ever talked about challenges related to hormones. That I am just slacking & making excuses. Every 2 week measurement we've had I've lost either inches or maintained my measurements.

I just really need to get over this crappy eating hurdle. In Sept I started training at 26.5 % bf. I'm down to 24% (which that thing fluctuates up to a whole percentage within minutes).

bf measurements are so inconsistent and inaccurate. Its not a good way to measure short term progress. As far as your eating, are you on a strict eating program, or are you just guessing what to eat. Prepare all your food on in advance , weigh and measure everything, have your meals planned out and prepped in advance so you aren't trying to figure out what to eat at each meal.

sdancer2017

Thank you for saying that! That stupid number really stresses me out.

Ok, thank you. I will pick myself back up after this hurdle & just approach it as a step by step task.
I feel overwhelmed & scared of failing, which sets me back.
How long did it take you to get into a consistent groove of planning & making healthy choices?

SonyaCele

sdancer2017 wrote: »

Thank you for saying that! That stupid number really stresses me out.

Ok, thank you. I will pick myself back up after this hurdle & just approach it as a step by step task.
I feel overwhelmed & scared of failing, which sets me back.
How long did it take you to get into a consistent groove of planning & making healthy choices?

i go through phases of being super diligent and planning out every meal and eating the exact calories, and then phases where i am out of control and eat and drink everything in sight. i just try and keep it balanced. I order bulk quantity plastic deli containers and use them to portion out my week's worth of meals. I eat the same thing every day, its boring but i know its accurate and fits my macros and calories allowed.

sdancer2017

Oh thank you for saying you struggle too & that it is boring (a week of clean eating & I thought "wow, a few inches lost-awesome! But eating the same thing everyday? (Sigh)"

It sounds like it is just a realistic component that my hunger will fluctuate & what I'm feeling is normal. I may bug you with some future tips, if that's ok.

livingleanlivingclean

sdancer2017 wrote: »

Oh thank you for saying you struggle too & that it is boring (a week of clean eating & I thought "wow, a few inches lost-awesome! But eating the same thing everyday? (Sigh)"

It sounds like it is just a realistic component that my hunger will fluctuate & what I'm feeling is normal. I may bug you with some future tips, if that's ok.

I plan and prep my meals - I find it helps with sticking to my calorie goals. I don't apply the "clean" term to how I eat. I make my meal plan based on foods I enjoy, the way I like to eat (big dinners and dessert everyday), what's available etc.

I have lost weight with meal plans set by other people, and whilst I'm great at sticking to them, choosing my own food is preferable and easier to stick to.

I used to eat emotionally - having meals prepped, and times set to eat them made me eat less food out of emotion. I got good at finding other ways to deal with stress/boredom/reward etc.

Accepting that a certain level of hunger is ok helps too. You don't need to be satisfied every minute of the day. If you are trying to lose, you may need to be ok with some times of hunger. (there may be tweaks you can make to feel less hungry, and more satisfied with your meals, but there is nothing wrong with hunger!)

sdancer2017

Thank you!! You look awesome & I LOVE the tips-even about the word choice. Thank you so much!!

ninerbuff

Honestly, I let my clients eat whatever they want. The only thing they NEED to be accountable to is the calorie goal set for them. Pretty black and white. They go over, the gain or maintain. They stay in deficit, they lose.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

maryannprt

sdancer2017 wrote: »

Thank you. No he doesn't charge. And he says that none of his clients have ever talked about challenges related to hormones. That I am just slacking & making excuses. Every 2 week measurement we've had I've lost either inches or maintained my measurements.

I just really need to get over this crappy eating hurdle. In Sept I started training at 26.5 % bf. I'm down to 24% (which that thing fluctuates up to a whole percentage within minutes).

Has this guy never had a female client? Some women struggle more than others, but jeez. If you have a better idea of what (and when) to expect during your cycle it'll be easier to deal with. Frankly, if I had a trainer who spoke to me like you say this trainer did, I would lose about 180 lbs of ugly fat and kick him to the curb. (And yes I know that contradicts what I said earlier about following his direction ) His job is to motivate and provide instruction, not to abuse, browbeat, and put down the people paying his salary. As far as "crappy" eating, what does that mean to you? I do believe most of your calories should come from good quality wholesome food. That doesn't mean you need to live on kale, brown rice and chicken breast. There's room in a healthy plan for sweets or drinks with your friends or chocolate the 2 days before your period starts. Best of luck. If you do decide to change trainers, a professional realizes not everyone is a good fit and won't take it personally.

cs2thecox

If you're measuring for body fat, I don't think it's necessary to do that every week, is it?
I do mine maybe every 2 months or something.

But if you're willing to deal with the shorter term fluctuations and have *agreed* to a weekly measurement, then yes just have it done. In my mind, data from when you've been bad is just as important (perhaps even more so) as data from when you've been good. After all, if we all only logged food on our good days, that would be super rose tinted view of reality.

If you want to change your measurement schedule, surely that's in your hands. You can always tell your trainer that you'd like to try it [2-weekly/monthly] for 3 or 4 months and see how it goes, because although you understand the accountability point, the weekly measurements stress you out and you find them counterproductive. If he's a good trainer, he should be willing to roll with your idea for a while...

deputy_randolph

So my trainer and I talk about our horomones all of the time...she's a woman. Your trainer (since he is a man) may have never had a female client mention her period...well, b/c he is a man.

My cycle definitely effects my strength. It isn't a monthly problem; more like an every 3 months problem. I was having a ROUGH training day, and my powerlifting coach asked "what's going on???" I had no idea. Then, she asked: "How far are you into your cycle?" Yeah...that was the issue.

Anyway...to address your other issue: changing trainers isn't going to make a difference if you don't change your behavior. If you are overeating, that can only be contolled by you. Don't stress about 1 off measurement...be more patient. This is going to be a process.

sdancer2017

Thank you so much deputy, cs2, maryann, & niner.
I feel much more comfortable & confident to approach this, to forgive myself & to understand I'm not alone after reading everyone's helpful posts. I really appreciate you all.

As a side note, someone contacted me about my offensive profile pic. When I signed up, I had no idea I'd want to be on the community part. My pic is to motivate myself & keep myself accountable. I'm not going to change it because you messaged me. That being said, I will find a way to delete this thread hopefully.

But thank you to everyone who helped & good luck on your goals!

kgeyser

@sdancer2017, unless you have a pic that is something other than the abdomen I am seeing, your pic looks fine and not at all offensive. You can block that individual from sending you any other messages by opening the message and selecting "Block."

livingleanlivingclean

sdancer2017 wrote: »

Thank you so much deputy, cs2, maryann, & niner.
I feel much more comfortable & confident to approach this, to forgive myself & to understand I'm not alone after reading everyone's helpful posts. I really appreciate you all.

As a side note, someone contacted me about my offensive profile pic. When I signed up, I had no idea I'd want to be on the community part. My pic is to motivate myself & keep myself accountable. I'm not going to change it because you messaged me. That being said, I will find a way to delete this thread hopefully.

But thank you to everyone who helped & good luck on your goals!

If yours is offensive, I hate to think what they think of mine... Don't feel the need to delete a thread because of what someone else thinks of your pic.

cs2thecox

Your profile pic is not offensive in the least (to me - can't speak for others) and is certainly no worse than many others on here!
If it was the crazy fundamentalist Christian guy with about 20 posts to his name, me and a number of other people already flagged him for abuse in another thread so hopefully he'll be gone soon.

As for hormones... my male PT brings it up sometimes. I have to keep reminding him that I have a Mirena (had to explain what that was!) that's basically wiped out my cycle, I'm artificially smoothed out and he can skip that part. Sometimes wish I had that to hide behind - mostly I just like gin and chocolate

ipmac22

At the end of the day, you have to work with a trainer that is beneficial to you. I've been really turned off to certain trainers with a one-size-fits-all attitude. So, don't be afraid to talk to him, and if he doesn't seem to be working with you instead of against you, then consider another! Also, some women experience real big changes throughout our cycles. It's your journey and you have to work with a trainer who is best for you!

sdancer2017

Oh thank you! It is that guy & while he was semi nice-ish (compared to one awful post I read), I was worried he would flag me & then I wouldn't be able to post. Thank you kgeyser!
Livinglean, I love your powerful pic!
Cs2 thank you!

BrianSharpe

sdancer2017 wrote: »

And he says that none of his clients have ever talked about challenges related to hormones. That I am just slacking & making excuses.

He sounds like a prince. /sarcasm

Maybe his other clients haven't discussed this with him because he's condescending and borderline abusive.

Azdak

You should not be measuring body fat on a weekly basis—esp with the likely crap machine this guy has.

Every body fat assessment method has a standard of error. Measuring too often means that the numbers are meaningless because they are just fluctuations within that error range. Measurements also have to be done under consistent conditions, which would be almost impossible for a female if they are being done on a weekly basis.

To be honest, this guy sounds like a total d!ck.

sdancer2017

Thank you!! Excellent perspective with the error & consistency! Never thought about that fact! But so true, you're right!
All variables need to be accounted for & all but one need to be consistent to notice what is actually the cause of the change (shout out to my high school science teachers & you, Azdak hahaha).

I hope any other newbies to the gym/measuring process read this post to not stress about that number. (Or i can delete it if someone knows how)

You all have been sooo helpful & encouraging! I'm happy to say with all the good energy & advice, I talked w my trainer today about many things. Hopefully we are in a good spot (but man, he is moody too!).

Thank you for all the support & guidance & good luck on your journeys!

Sumiblue

Um, it’s fairly well known that hormones play a big role in hunger and strength & energy depending on where a woman is in her cycle. Guess your trainer hasn’t read anything Lyle McDonald has been saying in regards to women and training. Measuring every week seems a little excessive, to me.
I’ve heard that if a woman really struggles with a deficit in a particular week due to cycle then maybe a refeed or maintenance break is helpful. Sure, it slows the weight loss but it’s better than binging and gaining.