Diet Meltdown, seeking help!
Andy97886
Posts: 6 Member
Ok so where do I start with this and I apologize if my writing might be hard to understand where I'm trying to get at, as just writing this on the forums takes a lot of guts from me as I suffer from sever depression, bipolar and a very shy insecure person that I am.
But last year from now I was in very bad health, I was a 30 year old male that stands at 5'6 tall and was 278 pounds. it was the time of the year I had my physical appointment and blood test results came in and of course I had high blood sugar and high cholesterol which I wasn't surprised and was quit normal with me but this time my doctor show me a chart that it was getting serious to the point where I was like 19 away from getting diabetes.
So after she show and said that to me that was a huge wake up call for me to get in shape so I started my diet but of course just like any noob dieter that had no clue I started it out wrong at the start and was eating 1200 calories and of course at this time is when I also signed up for Myfitnesspal which was recommended by my brother whos a gym/fitness type of guy as I should call him, but after like 2 weeks of being in 1200 calories he asked how much calories I was eating and I told him and he wasn't happy with me and told me to take TDEE calculator which I did but of course I me being stubborn I wasn't happy with what the TDEE results were giving me so I decided hey instead of 1200 just up it to 1500 calories and I was losing weight and was happy so far. now comes January a new year and my brother who has been asking me to come to the gym with him for awhile but I kept dodging it until jan 17 is when I really started taking my health serious so we went 2 times a week to the gym.
But as time went on and I was still losing weight but this was also taking a heavy toll on my mind, I was losing it both mentally and physically but sometimes around spring my brother recommended me a website to use to help with my fitness goal and it was called Avatarnutrition.com its a website that was created by PhD layne Norton whos a very big name in the fitness business. but I did and I started using that site to give me my calories and macros, it started out giving me if I remember 1650 calories and the macros I forgot but by now some of you are probably wondering why have I been talking about such a low calorie for my diet so far well let me explain now. as I mention earlier I been diagnosed with severe depression/bipolar and me being a very shy and insecure person that I am, I don't work and I don't go to school. I'm a very sedentary person. the only active times I get out of my life is when I go the the gym twice a week and that's only bcuz I have my brother there with me or else I won't go and the usual appointment I have with my psychiatrist which only happens once every 2 weeks, so yea I should label my self even more under then a sedentary person if there was a option for that.
but as days, weeks and months goes by I'm losing weight and losing my mind even more and Avatarnutrition adjusting my calories and macros the timeline of 1650 calories went down to 1473. I have lost a total of 112 pounds of my weight loss journey. I am now 166 pounds compare to 278 last year ago but I still don't feel happy about my self and my mind is getting really twisted at the moment. my family and friends and people at the gym have been saying I should stop losing weight and start eating at maintenance now and start building up muscles. but are what they saying right? should I really stop at 166 pound as a 5 foot and 6 inches male? my body type I am naturally broad size but have no muscles and I have a lot of loose skin. So it came down me carrying for what they were saying since everyone was worry about me cause I was acting like a monster for being in a calorie deficit for so long yesterday under my brother guidance I told avatarnutrition I'm done with my weight loss goal and to put me in maintenance but it put me in 1610 calories which I found strange cause from a number of TDEE websites I took they all said my maintenance should be in the ballpark of 1900-1950 calories a day with me being a very sendatarty person. my bro said its doing that as a safe way of bringing me back up to my maintenance as I should start it out slow instead of jumping straight up to 1900 so imma take his word.
So this brings me down to me now ending this soon and once again I apologize for my writing and anything else as this took a lot of me just to even have the courage to write this and introduce my self and the mental breakdown I am having at the moment. also something I forgot to mention was too this whole time I been going to the gym with my brother which is 2 times a week and hour and half of weight training and 35m of cardio, I haven't been eating my exercise calories this whole time I got scared of eating them back cause I read and watch a lot of videos as its a subject that's a debate some people say you shouldn't and some say that you should but only certain amount of it. if it helps I also have a fitbit that's syncs with myfitnesspal.
so my question is if I should be eating my calories back what should it be based on the cardio machine or the automactic calorie adjustment that was calculated by both myfitnesspal/fitbit ? and if I do eat them back whats the magic number of calories to eat back, should it be 75% of it back or 50% of it back.
if anyone can help me and has read what I wrote please I am seeking urgent help before I lose my mind as I still feel not happy with my weight at my height and active level and my exercise calories. and once again I apologize if my writing was hard to understand in anyway. thank you.
But last year from now I was in very bad health, I was a 30 year old male that stands at 5'6 tall and was 278 pounds. it was the time of the year I had my physical appointment and blood test results came in and of course I had high blood sugar and high cholesterol which I wasn't surprised and was quit normal with me but this time my doctor show me a chart that it was getting serious to the point where I was like 19 away from getting diabetes.
So after she show and said that to me that was a huge wake up call for me to get in shape so I started my diet but of course just like any noob dieter that had no clue I started it out wrong at the start and was eating 1200 calories and of course at this time is when I also signed up for Myfitnesspal which was recommended by my brother whos a gym/fitness type of guy as I should call him, but after like 2 weeks of being in 1200 calories he asked how much calories I was eating and I told him and he wasn't happy with me and told me to take TDEE calculator which I did but of course I me being stubborn I wasn't happy with what the TDEE results were giving me so I decided hey instead of 1200 just up it to 1500 calories and I was losing weight and was happy so far. now comes January a new year and my brother who has been asking me to come to the gym with him for awhile but I kept dodging it until jan 17 is when I really started taking my health serious so we went 2 times a week to the gym.
But as time went on and I was still losing weight but this was also taking a heavy toll on my mind, I was losing it both mentally and physically but sometimes around spring my brother recommended me a website to use to help with my fitness goal and it was called Avatarnutrition.com its a website that was created by PhD layne Norton whos a very big name in the fitness business. but I did and I started using that site to give me my calories and macros, it started out giving me if I remember 1650 calories and the macros I forgot but by now some of you are probably wondering why have I been talking about such a low calorie for my diet so far well let me explain now. as I mention earlier I been diagnosed with severe depression/bipolar and me being a very shy and insecure person that I am, I don't work and I don't go to school. I'm a very sedentary person. the only active times I get out of my life is when I go the the gym twice a week and that's only bcuz I have my brother there with me or else I won't go and the usual appointment I have with my psychiatrist which only happens once every 2 weeks, so yea I should label my self even more under then a sedentary person if there was a option for that.
but as days, weeks and months goes by I'm losing weight and losing my mind even more and Avatarnutrition adjusting my calories and macros the timeline of 1650 calories went down to 1473. I have lost a total of 112 pounds of my weight loss journey. I am now 166 pounds compare to 278 last year ago but I still don't feel happy about my self and my mind is getting really twisted at the moment. my family and friends and people at the gym have been saying I should stop losing weight and start eating at maintenance now and start building up muscles. but are what they saying right? should I really stop at 166 pound as a 5 foot and 6 inches male? my body type I am naturally broad size but have no muscles and I have a lot of loose skin. So it came down me carrying for what they were saying since everyone was worry about me cause I was acting like a monster for being in a calorie deficit for so long yesterday under my brother guidance I told avatarnutrition I'm done with my weight loss goal and to put me in maintenance but it put me in 1610 calories which I found strange cause from a number of TDEE websites I took they all said my maintenance should be in the ballpark of 1900-1950 calories a day with me being a very sendatarty person. my bro said its doing that as a safe way of bringing me back up to my maintenance as I should start it out slow instead of jumping straight up to 1900 so imma take his word.
So this brings me down to me now ending this soon and once again I apologize for my writing and anything else as this took a lot of me just to even have the courage to write this and introduce my self and the mental breakdown I am having at the moment. also something I forgot to mention was too this whole time I been going to the gym with my brother which is 2 times a week and hour and half of weight training and 35m of cardio, I haven't been eating my exercise calories this whole time I got scared of eating them back cause I read and watch a lot of videos as its a subject that's a debate some people say you shouldn't and some say that you should but only certain amount of it. if it helps I also have a fitbit that's syncs with myfitnesspal.
so my question is if I should be eating my calories back what should it be based on the cardio machine or the automactic calorie adjustment that was calculated by both myfitnesspal/fitbit ? and if I do eat them back whats the magic number of calories to eat back, should it be 75% of it back or 50% of it back.
if anyone can help me and has read what I wrote please I am seeking urgent help before I lose my mind as I still feel not happy with my weight at my height and active level and my exercise calories. and once again I apologize if my writing was hard to understand in anyway. thank you.
2
Replies
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All you need to do is pick a goal in Myfitnesspal, enter your stats. Then log all your food as accurately as possible, using vetted food entries.
When you exercise, enter that in the exercise tab. I always ate 100% of my exercise calories as given by Myfitnesspal. I lost 70 pounds that way. Other people find they need to eat fewer calories.
You figure that out by keeping good records for a couple months and seeing if you lose as expected. If you don't adjust.
It's an individual experiment in which you use your best guess to start and then fine tune it. It's what we all have to do.2 -
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Calorie estimates given in regard to exercise are based mostly on data collected from athletes giving consistent effort. They're usually overestimated by machines and calculators.
If you are using a fitness sensor like fitbit, they adjust your calories based on your walking/jogging/running activity. If you are, for example, a swimmer, then you may want to consider using a different estimation tool.0 -
Sorry to hear about your struggles and congrats on your amazing progress. Your brother sounds like a stand up dude who has given you good advice. Keep listening to him!
Gradually increasing your calories until you reach Maintenance sounds like a good plan. You could also get yourself some dumbbells or even just do some body weight exercises at home. 2 days a week at the gym is great, but if you want to put on some muscle, supplementing with home workouts would be great.
Do you see a therapist? As you've learned - losing weight alone isn't enough to fix all your mental health problems.7 -
So first off, congrats on losing over 100 lbs. Most people will never succeed at that, welcome to the club, you should be proud! I agree that regardless of your current BMI or body composition it's probably a good idea to do an extended period of maintenance eating simply for the psychological benefit. You can focus on muscle and strength building and always resume fat loss at a later point if you desire. Layne Norton is a big proponent of reverse dieting which is why I'm guessing his site gave you only a bit more calories despite the fact you asked for maintenance. My guess is it will slowly increase them until you arrive at something closer to what a TDEE calculator says. I will state that there is no decent evidence to support that reverse dieting has any benefits compared to adding 250 or 300 calories a week until you reach perceived maintenance but it's also not necessarily harmful so do what you think is best for you.
As far as eating back exercise calories, this is trickier. There are two ways to do it. The first way is to continue to mark yourself as sedentary for any calculations you use. If you do this you should eat back exercise calories. I wouldn't eat back 100% though because I believe that both machines and MFP overestimate this number. I'd try maybe 75% and if you seem to be gaining weight too fast, try 50%. The other way is to simply mark yourself as lightly active and not eat back any calories. If you increase the amount you workout, increase from lightly active to moderately active. Neither way is better than the other and they both involve a fair bit of estimating so just watch what your weight does over the long term and make adjustments to your calories consumed.
I will also warn you that as you increase calories you will gain some weight. Much of it will be water and glycogen. It cannot be fat if you remain in a deficit or are at maintenance so don't worry just be prepared. If after a month of eating what you now consider maintenance you continue to gain weight, then you have overshot and should reduce calories a bit. If you can, I'd increase your gym time to 3 days a week and really focus on some strength building. I'd maybe consider a fitness watch and try to increase your activity on days you don't leave the house. Even if it's just walking around the house it still counts as physical activity. You've done a great thing for your health losing that weight but increasing activity is also important for health. Hope some of this helps you out.11 -
You have a wonderful brother. His advice has been solid and he's stuck by you through all of this.
It's time to come up with a progressive lifting program and gradually increase your calories to feed those muscles.3 -
Thank you all and yes I been weighting and logging my food as best as I can, yes I do see a therapist since I was 8 and same doctor but still having mental problems but he hasn't giving up on me yet. but I will try the 75% eating my calories back and see how that works out for me as apart of my diet meldown I'm having at the moment was and forgot to mention was I pretty much deprived my self from all the foods I use to love eating as hard it is to belive me its true, my 1 year and 112 pounds of weight loss has been nothing but a clean diet. never gave me self a cheat day or ate anything I use to love eating which is probably part of my mental meltdown. something I was also thinking to help with me activity level how does buying a casual stationary bike and using it for 40 mins every day sounds like? and if I do should it be low intensity or high intensity as something I also forgot to mention is I do IF, I break my fast at 2pm and stop eating by 10PM if anything I'm more of a morning person so I prefer my workout in the morning compare to afternoon or will that have bad effects on my IF.0
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In addition to the others, remember to talk to your doctor as well. Ask if she has any recommendations.0
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Thank you all and yes I been weighting and logging my food as best as I can, yes I do see a therapist since I was 8 and same doctor but still having mental problems but he hasn't giving up on me yet. but I will try the 75% eating my calories back and see how that works out for me as apart of my diet meldown I'm having at the moment was and forgot to mention was I pretty much deprived my self from all the foods I use to love eating as hard it is to belive me its true, my 1 year and 112 pounds of weight loss has been nothing but a clean diet. never gave me self a cheat day or ate anything I use to love eating which is probably part of my mental meltdown. something I was also thinking to help with me activity level how does buying a casual stationary bike and using it for 40 mins every day sounds like? and if I do should it be low intensity or high intensity as something I also forgot to mention is I do IF, I break my fast at 2pm and stop eating by 10PM if anything I'm more of a morning person so I prefer my workout in the morning compare to afternoon or will that have bad effects on my IF.
I know it's hard to get past the mentality of "good" foods and "bad" foods but it really all comes down to calories. Your body doesn't care if you eat 200 calories of chocolate or 200 calories of spinach.
As long as you're meeting a healthy protein goal and getting enough micronutrients (vitamins, minerals, etc.), you can definitely enjoy smaller portions of foods you enjoy.
Many of us who are losing weight still enjoy chocolates, candies, fast food, pizza... as long as it fits into the calorie goal!
Life's too short to not enjoy your favourite foods.2 -
Thank you all and yes I been weighting and logging my food as best as I can, yes I do see a therapist since I was 8 and same doctor but still having mental problems but he hasn't giving up on me yet. but I will try the 75% eating my calories back and see how that works out for me as apart of my diet meldown I'm having at the moment was and forgot to mention was I pretty much deprived my self from all the foods I use to love eating as hard it is to belive me its true, my 1 year and 112 pounds of weight loss has been nothing but a clean diet. never gave me self a cheat day or ate anything I use to love eating which is probably part of my mental meltdown. something I was also thinking to help with me activity level how does buying a casual stationary bike and using it for 40 mins every day sounds like? and if I do should it be low intensity or high intensity as something I also forgot to mention is I do IF, I break my fast at 2pm and stop eating by 10PM if anything I'm more of a morning person so I prefer my workout in the morning compare to afternoon or will that have bad effects on my IF.
A stationary bike is a fine way to increase physical activity. As for low or high intensity that's really up to you and depend mostly on your goals. Working out fasted is fine. Going a long period of time from working out until eating probably isn't optimal but it's far less important than staying compliant so if it's working for you I'd be hesitant to change it.1 -
Thank you all and yes I been weighting and logging my food as best as I can, yes I do see a therapist since I was 8 and same doctor but still having mental problems but he hasn't giving up on me yet. but I will try the 75% eating my calories back and see how that works out for me as apart of my diet meldown I'm having at the moment was and forgot to mention was I pretty much deprived my self from all the foods I use to love eating as hard it is to belive me its true, my 1 year and 112 pounds of weight loss has been nothing but a clean diet. never gave me self a cheat day or ate anything I use to love eating which is probably part of my mental meltdown. something I was also thinking to help with me activity level how does buying a casual stationary bike and using it for 40 mins every day sounds like? and if I do should it be low intensity or high intensity as something I also forgot to mention is I do IF, I break my fast at 2pm and stop eating by 10PM if anything I'm more of a morning person so I prefer my workout in the morning compare to afternoon or will that have bad effects on my IF.
A stationary bike is a fine way to increase physical activity. As for low or high intensity that's really up to you and depend mostly on your goals. Working out fasted is fine. Going a long period of time from working out until eating probably isn't optimal but it's far less important than staying compliant so if it's working for you I'd be hesitant to change it.
ok, that brings me to my next question, when on the days I do go to the gym I give it my all out so I'm pretty sore, if I do low intensity on the bike should my heart rate be at a recommended range like 119+ or is anything less then 119 range a waste of time as reason I ask this cuz I wanna make sure I'm doing it right as some sites I read if you're not pumping your heart then your wasting your time so those sites saying that kind of scared me of ever doing my cardio exercises at a low intensity in the past and till now.0 -
ok then i'll go with the low intensity approach just to be safe, which should I be at any specific heart rate or it doesn't matter as long I get my body moving and still burning calories. reason I ask this cuz when I go to the gym I give it my all so I end up sore after that and want to make sure I'm resting on my off days but at the same time I wanna fix my activity level while I'm healing back up doing low intensity, so some online and videos mention if your heart rate isn't getting pump then you're just wasting your time on low intensity. so by them saying that has been scaring me from low intensity this whole time. is that true or no?0
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but as days, weeks and months goes by I'm losing weight and losing my mind even more and Avatarnutrition adjusting my calories and macros the timeline of 1650 calories went down to 1473. I have lost a total of 112 pounds of my weight loss journey. I am now 166 pounds compare to 278 last year ago but I still don't feel happy about my self and my mind is getting really twisted at the moment. my family and friends and people at the gym have been saying I should stop losing weight and start eating at maintenance now and start building up muscles. but are what they saying right? should I really stop at 166 pound as a 5 foot and 6 inches male?
Likely they are right. Especially if you're going bonkers trying to diet. Here's the thing, if you eat at TDEE for your current weight you won't gain or lose. Then if you add exercise you can actually use those calories to lose some fat but still have the chance (at least a little) of building some muscle. It sounds like you've been doing this for so long that you want to give up. Take a break if you want, eat at maintenance, but don't give up.
Technically you would want to continue dieting until you hit your target weight, or slightly below it, whatever that might be. For me it was about 10 lbs below the overweight mark on the BMI scales. I knew I wouldn't stay there if I wanted to build muscle, but it was a target I set and was happy with. I know plenty of people who are very muscular, in excellent shape, and are considered 'overweight' by the BMI scale because of their muscle mass. Set the goals you want to set for yourself and for your health, not goals you think others want.my body type I am naturally broad size but have no muscles and I have a lot of loose skin. So it came down me carrying for what they were saying since everyone was worry about me cause I was acting like a monster for being in a calorie deficit for so long yesterday under my brother guidance I told avatarnutrition I'm done with my weight loss goal and to put me in maintenance but it put me in 1610 calories which I found strange cause from a number of TDEE websites I took they all said my maintenance should be in the ballpark of 1900-1950 calories a day with me being a very sendatarty person. my bro said its doing that as a safe way of bringing me back up to my maintenance as I should start it out slow instead of jumping straight up to 1900 so imma take his word.
Anyone here can calculate your TDEE for you using their favorite site, but it's not going to make it any more accurate for you. You're going to get different results at every site because of the formulas they use. Body types don't really matter and have been largely debunked. What you need to do is select the site you feel is the most accurate, eat at that TDEE over a period of a few weeks and see if your weight goes up or down. If it goes up, you're likely eating a bit over TDEE. If it goes down, you're under. You'll need to dial that in yourself, it's different for everyone. The tough part is that it changes constantly based on the exercise we do, the food we eat, and even our age and amount of muscle we build (or lose). It's true your TDEE will go down as you lose weight, but as you build muscle, it'll go up (and so will your weight). That's why people in maintenance choose a range, usually +/- 5 to 10 lbs and if they go over that range they cut calories for a while or increase their exercise and if they go under the range they do the opposite. It's a game of checks and balances that we all have to learn to play successfully in my opinion.so my question is if I should be eating my calories back what should it be based on the cardio machine or the automactic calorie adjustment that was calculated by both myfitnesspal/fitbit ? and if I do eat them back whats the magic number of calories to eat back, should it be 75% of it back or 50% of it back.
The only thing I can say, and I'm no expert, far from it, is that it's different for everyone. You'll have people in this forum insist that a power meter on a bicycle is the only accurate way to judge calories. Then you'll have people swear that a HRM paired with a specific app is the most accurate. You'll also have people tell you that manually entering using what MFP suggests for X minutes of a specific exercise is the best way. It's going to be different for everyone, that's why people start with the numbers they are given by the machines or devices they use, then eat back 50% of those calories. Over a period of weeks (never make adjustments in a few days, always a few weeks) adjust the same way I mentioned above. If your weight is going down faster than anticipated, eat more of them back, if it's not, eat less. Dial it in and don't be afraid to make adjustments over a period of time to see what the outcome may be.
In the end make your decisions based on your goals and not the opinions of others. If you want to weigh less than what you do now, and aren't sure about stopping your weight loss journey now, then don't. Just don't go back to old habits. Continue to log your food, exercise, and know everything you do affects the outcome you want. Think of this as a way of life not a diet that you do and forget. Take the time you need, there's no race, my guess is that your doctor is happy with your health improvements already, and as long as you eat enough they will likely remain happy.
Oh, and regardless of what your TDEE ends up being, if you add exercise you get more calories. You should be adding regular exercise anyway. My TDEE without exercise is somewhere in the 1900-2000 calorie range, but that's not enough for me to be happy. However, with my current adopted exercise regimen I can eat in the 2500-2800 calorie range and maintain my weight, even up to 3000 calories a day if I want to build a little muscle. You don't, and you shouldn't, try to out-exercise a bad diet. But adding regular exercise in to afford more calories is perfectly fine. I use iifym.com because it calculates your calories and spreads them out over a 7 day period rather than having more to eat on days I exercise and less on days I don't.
Food for thought.0 -
OP, I read through your first post. The impression I got was that you are still using Avatar Nutrition. If you are doing that, you should be following their advice and eating the calorie goal they gave you. Unless I am misunderstanding, they've set you a calorie goal based on being sedentary, which you are not if you are exercising regularly. If you're going to pay them for their advice, I'd suggest giving them good input (telling them how much activity you are getting) in order to get good output (a good calorie goal) and then following that, allowing them to adjust your calories as you progress.0
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thank you, just finish talking to my therapist and going to try and fix my activity level to become more active every day and just push my self in the mean time going to be doing cardio everyday on low intensity and eat back 75% of my cardio exercise back to help with that for an hour and eat at maintenance 1900 and review my progress from there and try to build up some muscles. also something I always been wondering is how exactly close should I eat near my calorie goal should I stop at 1800 or 1850 or just try to get near 1900 but not over as some people leave room for error to be safe?0
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So if you are using avatar nutrition, after you finish your weight loss it is time to reverse diet. Reverse for at least 12 weeks to get your calories up and your metabolism repaired. The system won't let you gain much weight and you'll start to build muscle. After you are done reverse dieting, then you want to do maintenance for half that amount of time. Join the avatar facebook group for support on this.0
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