I am the only one who doesn't feel as fat as i am?

Pinkmaddycat
Pinkmaddycat Posts: 175 Member
edited September 30 in Motivation and Support
Ok so this is really becoming difficult for me....

I know what the scales say 171lb......ive lost 6lb since joining 4 weeks ago and i am happy with this, if it continues. Ive also lost some good inches too which is great.

However....i do not feel that 'fat' i feel bigger than i used to be and this is enough to make me want to change however whenever i go shopping its so depressing.....

yesterday a size 16 wouldn't go past my hips...i've never been bigger than a 16, i know it might just be this brand but seriously a 16 NOT fitting? I see other women and whilst its not healthy to compare i'm sure I'm not a typical 16. Its difficult because i am a classic pear shape my waist is a 14 and my top is often a 12 depending on if its fitted round waist then need a 14 again.

I feel quite good about myself sometimes and i know my boyfriend doesn't complain....although he has honestly said i looked my best on holiday which is about another 7lb away.

Then I have just been looking through the forums as i wanted to know what peoples goal weights for my height were and its seems that 120 - 130 is a good number...i was ONLY aiming for 140, which would be 37 lbs and i think this would be drastic change.

its so hard i just dont want to get obsessed with the scale if i start to look better but i'm worries i;ll always be fatter than i feel and therefore not reach my potential.

Does this make sense to anyone else?

Replies

  • rfcollins33
    rfcollins33 Posts: 630
    how tall are you?
  • _Sally_
    _Sally_ Posts: 514 Member
    Set your own goals and don't pay attention to what other folks are doing. Get to 140 and if you like that weight on you, then don't worry about it. The same weight can look very different on women of the same height, so only you can know what is best for you.
  • ChaseAlder
    ChaseAlder Posts: 804 Member
    The way I see myself in my head is so much different from how I see myself in the mirror, which is still better than how I appear in photos. We're in the same boat. I'm 5'7" and 175. I only thought I had about 42 pounds total when I started (at 192) but looking at women my height on the "what real women look like" website, I want to look like the girls that weight less than 120! I don't even see this as a possibility, getting that light! I was shocked when I figured out I was 72 pounds from looking how I want... I just didn't think I had that far to go.

    With that being said, I am not shooting for 120. I have a hard time seeing myself as fat anymore, 18 pounds gone. I feel slimmer and I look better, so yeah... my weight doesn't bother me here when it probably should.
  • camckinney
    camckinney Posts: 61 Member
    I understand. I too didn't think I "looked" that fat. I wear the same size as you. However, I started gaining and hitting a size 18 and realized my stomach was getting bigger and I just couldn't take it. My butt is what's big on me (inherited unfortunately) so since I really can't see my butt, I looked thin from the front. But I knew my butt was big which makes me look big to everyone else cause they see the whole package. My goal is to be 140-145. That's when I truly felt fit and skinny. I also know that this weight is unhealthy because my cholesterol is high as well. I'm looking to fit into a size 8 or 10 so I can truly feel good about myself and get rid of this big butt!
  • rfcollins33
    rfcollins33 Posts: 630
    The way I see myself in my head is so much different from how I see myself in the mirror, which is still better than how I appear in photos. We're in the same boat. I'm 5'7" and 175. I only thought I had about 42 pounds total when I started (at 192) but looking at women my height on the "what real women look like" website, I want to look like the girls that weight less than 120! I don't even see this as a possibility, getting that light! I was shocked when I figured out I was 72 pounds from looking how I want... I just didn't think I had that far to go.

    With that being said, I am not shooting for 120. I have a hard time seeing myself as fat anymore, 18 pounds gone. I feel slimmer and I look better, so yeah... my weight doesn't bother me here when it probably should.

    I LOVE that website. It's pretty awesome!
  • Amandac6772
    Amandac6772 Posts: 1,311 Member
    I was just thinking that. I've gained back about 13 lbs from my lowest and even when I was 152 and 5 ft 1 I never felt as fat as I was until I looked at pictures. Then I thought OMG.
  • fifijennings4
    fifijennings4 Posts: 18
    I totally understand how you feel. I dont think i look as big as i am either, its depressing when you go shopping but dont let this effect you too much! if the pounds are disappearing then dont measure by what dress size you are. plus, loads of high street stores cut their clothes smaller than the average size!
  • hollyheckman
    hollyheckman Posts: 18
    I know what you mean. I am currently at 190lbs. I've gained about 15lbs over the past year due to stress and some family issues, but I'm trying to get the weight off. Even before last year, when I was lighter, I was still trying to get down in size. I am 5'8", and I've never been a "small" girl. I just have a large frame and people never believe I weigh as much as I do. My goals don't center around my weight. The current "ideal" weight for my height is about 145lbs. I think I would look sick if I were that thin. I focus my goal more on how my clothes fit. I am currently wearing a size 12, and my goal is to wear a size 8. I've never worn a single digit size :) Just remember that your ultimate goal should be to feel healthy and good about yourself.
  • Pinkmaddycat
    Pinkmaddycat Posts: 175 Member
    I'm 5'4 and they are british sizes for those that asked.

    I'm pleased i'm not the only one. just looked on the waht real women look like site as i'd never come across this and 120lbs is literally skinny.....

    thanks
  • jimmy_jenkins
    jimmy_jenkins Posts: 65
    I 100 % agree with you. I'm not sure what feeling fat is supposed to feel like. I was saying to my sister that i don't "feel" any different now even after losing 46lbs. I can see a massive difference but dont feel it. The only thing i can put this down to was not feeling fat in the first place.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Different weights look different on different people, even if they're the same height. Heck, even the same weight will look different on YOU at different times in your life. The number on the scale is almost meaningless.

    At 5'5 and 160#, I was technically about 10 pounds overweight, but I felt great about the way I looked. I went to my 20th high school reunion feeling curvy and voluptuous, and like I could snap my skinny former classmates like twigs! :laugh: But while I was strong, I had no endurance... no cardiovascular health. I couldn't run a quarter of a mile without wheezing for hours. This whole thing wasn't so much for weight loss for me as to be healthy enough to run a 5k. Somewhere along the way, I realized I liked running, and can now run more than 10k.

    But still, weighing about 30 lbs less, there's still times when I don't think I look much different in the mirror, and I think that's because I was always ok with how I looked. Personally, I think that's a healthy way to be. :smile:
  • marquesajen
    marquesajen Posts: 641
    Hey there! I'm 5'10" and started here at 197 lbs, and I was trying on 16s and they weren't fitting for the first time ever, as in too small. That was the straw that broke the camel's back as they say. I too don't feel fat, or rather not all the time. Sometimes I really did, but 6 lbs down now I feel a little better already. Good luck in your journey :D
  • beckyinma
    beckyinma Posts: 1,433 Member
    I get it too. Also 5'4" I look down and the pear shape isn't as visible as it is in the mirror or photos. I like how I look when I look down or when I visualize how I look. It's when I look in the mirror, I get a shock. My pants are a us 16 (down from 18/20), my waist is a 14 and every pair of pants and shorts i have droops. And my shirts are a m-l, which is about a 12. L tops are getting too big. I wish L pants would start getting too big too! I still have 40lb I want to lose, and I'm workin it but I'm right there with you most days. I keep holding on to the thought that once everything is lost that can be lost on the top, then the bottom will start to go too.. it's the last thing that's jiggling when I run on the treadmill... LOL!
  • mefeight1964
    mefeight1964 Posts: 88 Member
    Not all bodies (and weights) are created equal! Our bodies typically fall into three categories: Ectomorph, Endomorph and Mesomorph. Which are you? Take the test at the link below. It might help you understand your body composition and why you feel the way you do better. :)

    http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/becker3.htm
  • wickedcricket
    wickedcricket Posts: 1,246 Member
    I've always been the biggest girl in the class/crowd so I guess I got used to it. Never think about it much, never bother to shop in the misses or petite dept. And getting into a swimsuit OCCASIONALLY didn't really bother me that much. Then I divorced and moved to an apt complex with a swimming pool.
    Getting into a swimsuit every day & seeing it in a mirror ... OMG! I need work! LOL (you could use my *kitten* for a movie screen)
    so here I am
  • Stephanie08
    Stephanie08 Posts: 1,023 Member
    I know exactly how you feel. All my life I've been bigger, and it wasn't until over the past maybe 5 years that I'm at my biggest, and have really come to realize that I'm FAT. But I'm only 5'1" and my healthiest weight is 145, which is 10lbs over the highest recommended weight range for my height. When I did weigh 145, and told people how much I weighed I'd always get the same response 'YOU DO NOT WEIGH 145', so obviously I look like I weigh a lot less than I really do.
  • stefraab
    stefraab Posts: 402 Member
    We're the same height and I have to say I feel the same as you. I felt fat at 177 - US sz 14... But as soon as I started losing I felt great. I even felt good at a sz 12 (UK 16 I think). Now that I'm a sz 8 (barely, a slightly loose 10) I feel fabulous but I'm not even at a healthy weight yet according to BMI and I can see I have more to lose.

    Anyway. Not sure what the point here is but I think I feel the same as you do :)
  • coltonsmumma
    coltonsmumma Posts: 80 Member
    I weight 263 pounds and feel as slim as someone who can fit into a 16. My goal weight will land me in a 16 and I will be so happy to get there.
  • daybyday
    daybyday Posts: 537 Member
    Set your own goals and don't pay attention to what other folks are doing. Get to 140 and if you like that weight on you, then don't worry about it. The same weight can look very different on women of the same height, so only you can know what is best for you.

    This is really good advice!! I am going to use it for myself. I strugge with what weight I "should" be and look at what others the same height as me want to be.
  • Sharont213
    Sharont213 Posts: 323 Member
    It doesn't help when you look at the "recommended" ranges they list for people.. when I joined WW, based on my height of 5'4", I was supposed to be no more than 145 lbs.. but it is how that weight is distributed that really counts.. stomach weight is the worst.. so if you carry your weight evenly, 150 -155 might be just fine for you..
  • SueGremlin
    SueGremlin Posts: 1,066 Member
    I always forget how overweight I am. I do not feel fat, but then I see a photo of myself, and oh boy.
    Even in the mirror trying on clothes, I feel ok.

    It's very weird how we see ourselves vs how we really are.
  • marleneakameme
    marleneakameme Posts: 9
    Your clothing size depends on make of clothes and how your weight and muscle are distributed thru your body. I am 5'8 and currently weigh 278 and wear a size 18 jean. So, you see it just depends. I do have muscle, but have to rid myself of the fat around it. As far as " right weight" its when you feel your healthiest. Personally for your height I think 120 is too small, I am looking at 145. But like I said, its HOW YOU FEEL THAT COUNTS! Best wishes on your journey.
    And I am the opposite, I feel fatter than I look and how others see me.
  • stefraab
    stefraab Posts: 402 Member
    I always forget how overweight I am. I do not feel fat, but then I see a photo of myself, and oh boy.
    Even in the mirror trying on clothes, I feel ok.

    It's very weird how we see ourselves vs how we really are.

    This reminds me of when I was pregnant. I never ever felt huge or unwieldy. But now when I look at pics I think "holy crap, how did I even walk?!". I went to the gym the day before I went into labor! I guess you're only as fat as you feel :)
  • colorfulcupcakes
    colorfulcupcakes Posts: 122 Member
    The way I see myself in my head is so much different from how I see myself in the mirror, which is still better than how I appear in photos. We're in the same boat. I'm 5'7" and 175. I only thought I had about 42 pounds total when I started (at 192) but looking at women my height on the "what real women look like" website, I want to look like the girls that weight less than 120! I don't even see this as a possibility, getting that light! I was shocked when I figured out I was 72 pounds from looking how I want... I just didn't think I had that far to go.

    Oh, interesting website! I've never seen this before.

    There is also the Illustrated BMI Project on Flickr:
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/77367764@N00/sets/72157602199008819/
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