Does anyone else find it hard to meet a partner that shares your passion of maintenance
psychod787
Posts: 4,099 Member
Maybe I am odd, I actually am LOL, but I have had real trouble meeting women that share my passion of nutrition and weightlifting. I do live on a small town, so that might not help, but most of the women I meet just want to eat crap food and watch tv.
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MFP needs a personals section. Reading your title made me laugh about what an awkward sounding dating profile that would be, "Looking for a lady with a passion for maintaining her weight." Fitness and nutrition passion is definitely a thing. She's out there, but yes, most people just want to eat fast food, watch TV, and complain about how hard it is to lose weight.40
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keep looking! have you tried online dating? My husband is not really into fitness, eating well, or health in general and it is hard. I do wish he was more into it, but I can't exactly force it on him
Do you have friends that are into fitness / lifting at least?6 -
It can be hard, even if you're still on your health journey. I had a boyfriend years ago when I first tried MFP (omg, it was 2008
) who actually told me I had an eating disorder because I was counting calories/eating my macros and working out 4 to 6 days a week. I realized he was being insecure. I think keeping in mind if your health is a priority, it's going to take time to find a partner that has that same mindset.
Sometimes just finding friends who share that same passion is enough to provide support and understanding. So that's an alternative. Best of luck!5 -
I have a few friends into the lifestyle, but most have always been in shape. I was one 410lns, so my body and mind is different than theirs. Online dating? Never tried it. I met my now ex wife the old fashioned way. One of the reasons we split was the fact I got tired of being huge! Lol4
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psychod787 wrote: »I have a few friends into the lifestyle, but most have always been in shape. I was one 410lns, so my body and mind is different than theirs. Online dating? Never tried it. I met my now ex wife the old fashioned way. One of the reasons we split was the fact I got tired of being huge! Lol
Try online dating. Really.2 -
I don't tell my boyfriend that I'm counting calories only that it's working, lol.
Try online dating but not dating sites. Go to meetups (meetup.com) I guess I was lucky that my boyfriend and I ran into each other on a site that wasn't for dating, that can be hard to do sometimes.5 -
Lol, I met my husband years ago, and we were both already overweight for many years before that so a shared "passion of maintenance" is not exactly stop priority.1
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You might have stumbled across a paradox (that isn't a paradox) - successful maintainers, people who are genuinely interested in nutrition, and exercise because they like it, aren't likely to flaunt it - for them, it's normal daily life, and no big deal. If you lift somewhere outside your home, look for women there.4
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Lol... the paradox..how not to be the creepy guy at the gym!12
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Haha
I said look for women, don't stare at women 
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Habits change, you may meet someone that wants to watch TV and eat crap now, but it doesn't mean they are always like that. Up where I live people tend to hibernate during the winters, I know I do sometimes. Then summer comes along and I get more active.
But yeah if you want to meet women who have the same interests as you, then just keep doing the things that interest you and it will come if you put in the effort. Don't be the creepy guy at the gym but it's not creepy to strike up conversations here and there.
Online dating is a great tool also, I don't get why so many people are scared of it. It doesn't even have to be a dating site, use social media to be social. Keep an eye out for friends of friends and ask them to set you up if you see anyone that looks interesting.7 -
Absolutely what Roadie said. People change, even you changed yourself. You don't have to find someone who is exactly like you and even if you did they can and will change. Life is like that!
The trick is maintaining YOUR goals regardless of the world around you. 6 -
In your area, are there any fitness-related clubs you can join? Hiking, cycling, or skiing clubs? You are more likely to meet like-minded people there.2
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I love eating crap food and watching TV! I also love lifting heavy *kitten* and running.13
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Davidsdottir wrote: »I love eating crap food and watching TV! I also love lifting heavy *kitten* and running.
My twin.6 -
I agree it would be great to have partner who shared the same mindset for health and wellness. Keep looking, she’s out there. She may not be maintaining per se, but she cares about her body and what she puts in it.1
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kommodevaran wrote: »You might have stumbled across a paradox (that isn't a paradox) - successful maintainers, people who are genuinely interested in nutrition, and exercise because they like it, aren't likely to flaunt it - for them, it's normal daily life, and no big deal. If you lift somewhere outside your home, look for women there.
What I was thinking.
I'm into fitness, I suppose. I train for and run half marathons.
On dating sites? I avoid any guy who is all "i'm into fitness! I lift! I live in the gym!"
I do *not* want my romantic or dating life to be exclusively about fitness, and having dated someone who *was* all about that, it's a phase of my life that I do not need to repeat. I don't want to be with someone who is going to get all judgey pants if I decide I want to sit and knit all day, or if it's cold, and I don't *want* to leave the house.14 -
collectingblues wrote: »kommodevaran wrote: »You might have stumbled across a paradox (that isn't a paradox) - successful maintainers, people who are genuinely interested in nutrition, and exercise because they like it, aren't likely to flaunt it - for them, it's normal daily life, and no big deal. If you lift somewhere outside your home, look for women there.
What I was thinking.
I'm into fitness, I suppose. I train for and run half marathons.
On dating sites? I avoid any guy who is all "i'm into fitness! I lift! I live in the gym!"
I do *not* want my romantic or dating life to be exclusively about fitness, and having dated someone who *was* all about that, it's a phase of my life that I do not need to repeat. I don't want to be with someone who is going to get all judgey pants if I decide I want to sit and knit all day, or if it's cold, and I don't *want* to leave the house.
I understand what you are saying, but what I have learned is, when you are with someone who does not share your common interests, it makes life harder. Nothing wrong with sitting and knitting all day if that is what you want to do. Lol. Life does not have to revolve around just one thing.1 -
collectingblues wrote: »kommodevaran wrote: »You might have stumbled across a paradox (that isn't a paradox) - successful maintainers, people who are genuinely interested in nutrition, and exercise because they like it, aren't likely to flaunt it - for them, it's normal daily life, and no big deal. If you lift somewhere outside your home, look for women there.
What I was thinking.
I'm into fitness, I suppose. I train for and run half marathons.
On dating sites? I avoid any guy who is all "i'm into fitness! I lift! I live in the gym!"
I do *not* want my romantic or dating life to be exclusively about fitness, and having dated someone who *was* all about that, it's a phase of my life that I do not need to repeat. I don't want to be with someone who is going to get all judgey pants if I decide I want to sit and knit all day, or if it's cold, and I don't *want* to leave the house.
Well usually people post about their love for travelling, their cats or whatever passion, why is it wrong for someone to write about their passion for fitness and nutrition?0 -
You know, there are fitness dating apps and sites you could try.1
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I have been thinking more about this. Today I decided that for me, eating well and exercising are just means to live a happy and healthy life, not something I want to be my passion. Here in Norway we had a funny commercial for some laundry detergent, where the slogan was something like "an ambition for white towels". Some people are like that and that is okay. But most people just want clean towels and to go on with their lives.collectingblues wrote: »kommodevaran wrote: »You might have stumbled across a paradox (that isn't a paradox) - successful maintainers, people who are genuinely interested in nutrition, and exercise because they like it, aren't likely to flaunt it - for them, it's normal daily life, and no big deal. If you lift somewhere outside your home, look for women there.
What I was thinking.
I'm into fitness, I suppose. I train for and run half marathons.
On dating sites? I avoid any guy who is all "i'm into fitness! I lift! I live in the gym!"
I do *not* want my romantic or dating life to be exclusively about fitness, and having dated someone who *was* all about that, it's a phase of my life that I do not need to repeat. I don't want to be with someone who is going to get all judgey pants if I decide I want to sit and knit all day, or if it's cold, and I don't *want* to leave the house.
Well usually people post about their love for travelling, their cats or whatever passion, why is it wrong for someone to write about their passion for fitness and nutrition?11 -
I met my BF when I was in the middle of a 50lb weight loss (I had about 20lbs left when we met). He loves food, eating out and beer. And video games. I'm pretty sure he's never seen the inside of a gym. But, he's normal weight and has been all of our relationship. But he lets me do my thing, and I let him do his.4
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jennybearlv wrote: »MFP needs a personals section. Reading your title made me laugh about what an awkward sounding dating profile that would be, "Looking for a lady with a passion for maintaining her weight." Fitness and nutrition passion is definitely a thing. She's out there, but yes, most people just want to eat fast food, watch TV, and complain about how hard it is to lose weight.
You mean MFP isn't a dating site already?
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Of course there is something to be said of opposites. My husband could probably live indefinitely off of chicken nuggets and MtDew, while I have flavored seltzer water and lettuce wraps LOL0
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How about the 'try hard to eat healthy and exercise but unfortunately loves cookies' type? lol5
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My fiance and I both work out and eat right. The one thing we don't do is work out together. We tried it once....lol2
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I am fairly keen on my fitness and nutrition but it always puts me off male dating profiles if their only photos are gym selfies and they mention no other interests that's when I kinda run away in the opposite direction.1
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It's so difficult to lose or maintain weight when in a relationship with someone who doesn't take their health seriously. Even the men who are thin that i've dated most of the time are just naturally born that way and still lay around and eat chips and pizza while watching tv all night because they can without gaining a pound. They don't understand that if I'm going to stay under 200lbs, I CANT do that. They'll say "come on, its just a few slices of pizza"...
Luckily my boyfriend now takes his health at least somewhat seriously. He works out occasionally, and really isn't into laying around eating bad foods all day. He is naturally thin but he's concerned about staying healthy, so if he eats a cheeseburger he FEELS unhealthy which is far better than any of my other experiences. I'd love for he and I to work out together, like join a class or something, but I've been unsuccessful in my attempts to convince him to do that haha.
Good luck in your searches!!2 -
I never really thought too much into it until I met my ex.
We meal prepped, we would go to the gym together.
I now realize how important those will be when I find my next partner.1 -
How about the 'try hard to eat healthy and exercise but unfortunately loves cookies' type? lol
I am ok with that. In fact, i will bake you some cookies. Lol I mean, I am not looking for miss universe. Looks take a back seat to personality and passion. I was once that guy who would try to ruin weight loss and being healthish. Lol maybe it's just pay back. I am just looking for a person who instead of going to dominos if we want pizza, we instead grab a lidus wrap, put on some fresh tomato sauce, some part skin mozzarella, some turkey pepperoni, and lots of fresh veggies and make our own pizza. Or instead of five guy, we make it from lean ground beef, a whole wheat bun, and some baked sweet potato fries. I can cook. Lol instead of just sitting in front of Netflix, we go out for a walk, I live in florida, so I can do that nearly year round, and then enjoy Netflix. Does not get mad at me for going to the gym 4 days a week. It that asking too much? Lol2
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