Sending out a S.O.S.

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Oomeme
Oomeme Posts: 5 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hey everybody! I'm a 51 yo Mom of four - my baby is 7-going-on 8 and it's time for me to get rid of my baby fat!!! This is my third day journaling food and I'm really impressed with how large the food database is. I have a friend who joined here and has lost 15 lbs. so far and is rockin' this thing! I have lost and gained the same weight several times and two years ago realized what my trigger is. The positive attention I get when I lose the weight is a double edged sword for me. I LOVE the attention and at the same time - it is my foe. When I was 18 I was violently raped. My attacker told me "I should never look that good". Now when I receive a compliment about the way I look, I can feel my heartbeat quicken, and my blood turn to ice water. I look forward to starting a new journey towards a healthier happier mom, and I am open to all strength and experiences that you are able to share. :smile:

Replies

  • mrau719
    mrau719 Posts: 288 Member
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    Welcome! Good luck on your journey :)

    Feel free to add me if you'd like for extra support!
  • Happy0326
    Happy0326 Posts: 159 Member
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    WELCOME!!!! what I have found of MFP is LOTS of motivation, encouragement & it helps me stay on the right track. I have lost 11 lbs. a little at a time but it's coming off. LOL!! Just keep logging on & I hope you will find as much help as I have on here. The ladies are wonderful. I have a MFP who will get in my butt right away & get me back on track...LOL!!! This is a rough journey but we can get through it together. : )
  • broadsword7
    broadsword7 Posts: 411 Member
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    Welcome to MFP Oomeme. You have led a life of courage and you still are. I am sorry to hear about what happened to you and it must be a great burden, but you seem to have a really good hold on knowing yourself, which I believe is THE most important thing to do. We can't control too much about what goes on around us, but we CAN control how we feel about ourselves, and make good, healthy choices for ourselves. MFP has helped me in my own journey and I know it can help with yours. Good luck and good health to you now and always!
  • wickedcricket
    wickedcricket Posts: 1,246 Member
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    I too received unwanted attention when I was smaller. I hide behind fat too. Now I'm invisible, guys don't hit on me, they don't even look me in the eye.
    I'm thinking now that I'm old, I won't get hit on like I did when I was 30; but that is a bridge I will cross when it happens. I'm doing this for me (and for cute clothes)
  • CatClark
    CatClark Posts: 74 Member
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    Breaks my heart to hear what you went through, I'm truly so sorry. I can't speak from any kind of experience, but I can absolutely see where you're coming from. I can only guess that in the same position, I'd try to turn the whole ugly cycle on its head. Rather than feeling weakened by the terrible things that happened to you, and associating looking good with that terrible crime (a punishment for looking too good? My blood is boiling for you here...) - maybe you could try to turn the experience of become stronger, fitter and healthier on its head - a positive reclaiming of your body, and the greatest act of love and respect for your self?

    Please do feel free to add me - we can motivate each other along the way :)
  • rozes1126
    rozes1126 Posts: 4 Member
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    I am sorry about the past. I understand about the double edged sword. It really is nice to hear when your hard work has been paying off; but on the other hand it is enough to start you to lower your guard - which then leads you back down that slippery slope. Just remember you are doing this for yourself and your health not anyone else. It is also not always about looking good but feeling good. You have that strength. Good luck.
  • happydeer
    happydeer Posts: 10
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    Hang in there fellow survivor! Remember that taking care of yourself is something you do for YOU, not for other people. Don't leave the pounds on that YOU don't want to be there just because you think they'll influence other people one way or another.

    I'm 29 with no kids, but I can definitely relate to the fear of harassment spiraling out of control. One thing I always try to think about is that my life is different than when I was younger, and I'm much better prepared to sense when people are actually out of line and deal with it on the spot than I used to be. So, if someone tells me something that puts me on alert, I notice it and remember. Something about that process helps me feel centered. Also, as I'm getting more fit, my perceptions are getting clearer.

    It takes so much courage to do what you're doing Oomeme. I believe in you!

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