how not to be "the mom"

How old are your kids? Why don't they like leftovers? In my house if I cook I dictate what they eat and I know my kids so on days I make something they may not like then I modify it for them or they get breakfast dinner (typically eggs and toast).

You could meal prep and cook just for you every three or four days and make kids what will be "happy" with every day... But then eat your own food at meals... Or try to get kids to eat your food

I was raised the way JeromeBarry1 describes and am raising my kids the same way. Food is food. If you didn't finish your plate for a meal you'd get it at the next one. Not hungry anymore? Fine then no dessert. "There are starving people in the world who would kill for what you have." and " Food isn't free, you can waste it when you pay for it " that's what my mum used to say to us all the time. Maybe teaching your kids about responsable eating is something that you need to do though. I mean unless you're vegans an animal has been slaughtered for your needs. If you say grace before a meal that could be a way of raising awareness.

That being said I personally cook to the right amount so as to create very little to no left overs at all. Most leftovers like pasta and rice is used in salads for the kids lunch boxes, meats and veggies are recycled into soups and other one pot recipes. I've done 3meats currys for exemple with leftover chicken, pork and turkey. I blended left over veggies, mash, into sauces for the next meal. I've made pie fillings etc. There are plenty of ways to incorporate left overs into your cooking and others wouldn't even know it's there.

And incorporate the kids into the cooking process as well. I bought a spatula and a apron for each of my kids and I distribute jobs around the kitchen. My 4yo adores it and my 7yo has his own handmade recipe book. Also cooking is not a girl thing.

I cook one big meal every couple of days & we eat it until it's gone. I have 4 kids. They either eat it, or they make themselves something else. Granted, my kids are now older 19, 16, 14, 12, so that's not a big deal for them. I don't like to cook & I have no problem eating the same thing every day. I will also freeze it if it's getting too old. I put individual servings in plastic cups & freeze them until they are hard & then put several cups into gallon size freezer bags for storage.

I've always been a picky eater myself so I've never forced my kids to eat what they don't like. I remember sitting for hours in front of my plate when I was little because I don't like onions & my mom puts onions in her spaghetti. Biting into an onion, even now, makes me vomit. One of my kids is autistic & had major eating issues when he was little, so I've always had easy things they could pick from as alternatives--cereal, toast, oatmeal, microwave eggs, canned or microwave pasta, chicken nuggets, etc. If they want to make it, I'm OK with it.

I understand this dilemma, I really do.

Worse, my children are all very picky eaters and there are few meals that all of them will eat.

I got pretty tired of it - because I am a trucker's wife and full-time student. I don't have time to make four different dinners every night. My solution is, I make dinner for myself and my oldest child (the least pick eater). I offer that to the two youngest and if they don't want it there's a drawer where I keep cubed cheese, yogurt, sandwich meat, etc and they are welcome to make their own dinner. At first, that drawer saw a lot of action, but less and less over time. Sometimes I will toss some frozen chicken nuggets and fries in the toaster oven. They never seem to get sick of that.

I stopped buying snacks as a regular food option. I buy a certain amount of easy-grab, easy-to-prepare stuff like mac-n-cheese cups and pop-tarts, but when they are gone, they're gone. I stopped buying cookies - which used to be as important as buying milk and we make them, occasionally, instead.

If you're doing ketogenic, you'll find that options for feeding your kids and staying within the plan is pretty simple. You can eat quesadillas (with low-carb tortillas) and overall the options are pretty plentiful in the dessert arena.

Since I generally serve dinner family-style, I can feed tacos to my kids while having a taco salad pretty easily. It's all about portions, not banning everything kid-friendly. Spaghetti is no longer the main entree - and my kids LOVE having their own customized salads with a side of pasta.