Milestone sabotage...

katzdinak · March 2018

Starting weight 3/10/17: 345
Current weight: 257

I am coming up on my year anniversary with MFP in a few days. I thought I'd be down 100 pounds by now and I'm so close...yet so far.

I went almost a year without binging. Total focus and control. Steady loss. Then I had a work trip last month and lost my grip one night. Since then, I've binged 3 more times. Granted I binged on rice cakes, but mentally it's the same and it's such a fine line.

Tonight (after 7 rice cakes - 350 calories total) I realized that I may be unintentionally self- sabotaging because I know I won't meet my 1 year goal.

Can anyone relate? How did you move past it? Am I too focused on a goal or not focused enough? What's happening here?

DebLaBounty · March 2018

I’m not sure if you’re sabotaging yourself because you feel you’ve let yourself down, but I think you have lost perspective. Why did you set a deadline in the first place? Take a deep breath. Look at your “before “ pictures. Look at pictures of yourself today. You can see the difference, can’t you? You’ve lost an average of 7.33 pounds per month, which is AMAZING. Now recalibrate, and set a goal of losing 5 pounds a month. You’ll feel like a superstar if you lose more quickly, and happy if you just meet that goal. The only time I’ve felt like a weight loss failure is when I’ve set some arbitrary deadline. So don’t do that!

Your slip-ups recently are really no big deal. Cut yourself some slack! You’re a success.

tiptoethruthetulips · March 2018

Wow, you've achieved a great loss in the time that you have. Well above the average in fact.

Your disappointment is because you are judging your success solely on a scale number. Look at what you've achieved over the past year...it is far greater than a pre determined number. With the weight you have lost your health has no doubt improved immensely, you can walk up stairs without being so breathless, how many sizes have you lost, how much further can you walk, how much more you can do, how many inches/centimetres you have lost etc etc

Time to start setting some non scale success measures.

Don't use your perceived lack of success be your undoing.

batorkin · March 2018

7 rice cakes is not going to make a difference. Probably some of the best things to binge on. Sometimes we get cravings and go through a hard month.

Setting deadlines is bad in my opinion. Just lose weight one step at a time.

helena99716 · March 2018

I can totally relate. I'm in the same situation. I've lost 49 kg so far and I'm reaching one of my goals (73.8 kg) but ever since I got close to it, like 0.5 kg away, I started slipping up. Yesterday I had pizza and that was after I've eaten all of my calories for the day, on Monday I went to a Chinese buffet. And many more before that. I feel like I'm losing control. I've been doing this for almost a year and a half now, and this never happened before so I'm freaking out. I'm trying all the tricks in the book, logging food and planning meals for days in advance but that doesn't stop me from telling my husband to order that damn pizza. I think that you, like me, might be reaching a point where it's getting a bit too much for your body to continue for now, have you considered maintaining for a week or two? I know it can be tough to consider when you're so close to your goal, but it could do you more good than you think.

spzjlb · March 2018

I agree with @DebLaBounty and @tiptoethruthetulips that your frustration is due to your self imposed deadline and a number on the scale. While it is good to have weight or fitness goals, we shouldn’t be too hard on ourself if we miss. Especially when we miss the goal by just a hair, BUT the overall achievement is amazing. You remind me of my sister, who ran a full marathon but missed her goal time by 4 minutes. She was devastated...but she ran and finished a freaking 26 mile marathon! Her life continued and she still runs. Your life will continue and you will reach that 100 lb milestone. If it’s a few days or weeks or months later than you hoped - so what. It’s still ONE HUNDRED POUNDS. Get back on the horse and take time to really look at where you started and where you are now. You’re amazing!

88olds · March 2018

I don’t like time oriented goals. Time oriented weight loss is a way to turn success, losses, into failure, not on time. Fight back.

The fact is you’ve done outstanding work. Spend some time on this. Things that come to mind, stand in front of the mirror and say out loud, that you are doing great work on your weight loss project. Got pics? Compare them, say out loud that you look so much better now.

If you can’t say those things with conviction, work on it until you can. Anyone in your life you can trust? Have them say those things to you. Even if you have to write a script.

Now that you’ve got your pat on the back, what’s the plan going forward? My personal favorite, pride in appearance. I became the office fashion plate, me, really. And I started after losing about 25 lbs of 100. People put stuff off because they aren’t at goal. Reap some tangible rewards.

Speaking of rewards, instead of the calendar, how about making a list of ways your life has gotten better this year?

But from here out I’d ditch the calendar, you only need a downward trend you can live with and some patience.

katzdinak · March 2018

I don't know why I never post on here... This has been the most helpful and inspiring thing! Thank you all so much for taking the time to read and respond. It means so much to me. Your insights are just what I needed to help me move past this. THANK YOU!

Milestone sabotage...

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