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Need help to be a "success story"! (aka my metabolism is dead)

vkdaya
vkdaya Posts: 8 Member
edited November 2024 in Getting Started
Hello MFP people.
(CW Undereating)

I used to use MFP when i first started my weightloss journey, and it really helped me a LOT (as you can see from the picture), but this time i need advice from people, because i haven't been able to lose ANY weight for a long period of time.

I will share my story so you can get some insight on my life and habbits and i'm really looking forward for some help and advice from the community.

u5yrb87tj32w.jpg

I started my journey at around 105+ kilos (1st picture) when i was 28 years old. I had been at that weight range for my whole life till then and my goal weight was very realistic, to be around 70 kilos or so. I decided to start eating clean and lose some weight finally.

I got to 85kilos (2nd picture) just by eating tons of veggies and cutting out junk food.
Then i hit a big plateau, so i started logging in MFP all my meals without being lazy, and i got to 75kilos fast and easy (3rd picture).

And then i messed up. I was in a really bad place mentally and i got obsessed with losing weight faster and faster, so i started undereating. Some days i would skip all meals, or when i ate, i ate only a small ammount of calories.
I got to 56 kilos (i was 57kilos in the 4th pic) and that came with a lot of health problems, because i was developing anorexia. I'm not going to namedrop all the health problems i brought upon my self, but i need to mention that i completely killed my metabolism, obviously. After seeing my doctors and realizing that i was harming my self, i went back on track and followed their advices for a healthy and rich in nutrients diet but for a healthy mindset.

The 5th pictures, is me today at 30 years old and 65kilos.
After following my doctors advices, i gained back some weight, i've been 65 kilos now for over a year and my height is 167cm.
I've been trying to lose weight and go back to 60 kilos which is the weight i'm feeling most comfortable being, but it has been IMPOSSIBLE for me. I don't eat junk food but i'm not as obsessed with clean eating like i used to be. I'm trying to do this the healthy way, but i've seen no results in a year. If i eat 1200 calories a day as most would suggest for example, i gain weight and i think it's because my metabolism is dead.

I hope someone has experience with something similar and will give me some advice on what to do. I should also add, that i have an underactive thyroid, i take a 0.1mg pill of T4 every morning. I do work out but nothing crazy and not a lot, i just do yoga or pilates, some rope and weights at home.

I'm really looking forward to any advice, because i still feel like i'm obese all the time, even if i'm at a healthy weight according to most charts. I don't want to put my health in danger again, i want to do no mistakes this time.

Feel free to ask any questions if i forgot to mention something that could be important :)

Replies

  • mortuseon_
    mortuseon_ Posts: 257 Member
    CW: ED

    I'm an ED survivor and I can relate to the feeling of thinking you are obese all the time, even when you are a healthy weight. Have you heard of body dysmorphia? It really messes with your perception of yourself and is common for people with eating disorders/who have lost a lot of weight quickly/both of those things. It's worth looking into it if you identify with it. You might be able to find some resources online, or a therapist who can help. If your loss was recent, it can also take some time for your self-perception to 'normalise' (from personal experience, anyway).


    In terms of weight gain, I would weigh food very meticulously (as long as it isn't a trigger for you) to ensure your calorie count is very accurate, and then increase by something like 100 kcal a week to see where the point you start gaining is - then, you can set your deficit from there. It may be that you are eating more than you think.

    You could also try something like recomp (eat at maintenance - requires that you figure that out with careful logging, though!) which will lead you to look more lean whilst maintaining your weight. Might be good if you're already a healthy weight. Or you could EVEN try gaining muscle (you'd probably have to eat over your maintenance calories for this - see the 'gaining weight and bodybuilding' section of the forums), since you'd probably like the physique results and having more muscle will give you more calories to burn...
  • orangegato
    orangegato Posts: 6,572 Member
    You look great at 65 kg!
  • vkdaya
    vkdaya Posts: 8 Member
    Thank you! Before i started this journey, i would have killed to have the body i have now. But now, i don't feel like my best but i don't want to risk my health while trying to reach my goal again. My ultimate goal is to be healthy, strong and confident in my own skin, without looking at the scale :smiley:
  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,213 Member
    Do you strength train? I'm wondering if some recomposition might be a more appropriate action than weight loss for you right now. If you're anything like me, you'll fall in love with the changes you see. I'm not sure that this is universal, but I also get less anxious/more confident when I'm strength training regularly.
  • vkdaya
    vkdaya Posts: 8 Member
    edited March 2018
    I'm a bit of a noob when it comes to working out so i don't really know what strength train is hehe.
    I used to go to the gym 6 days a week last year and i got more toned but didn't lose any weight. I was mostly doing pilates and yoga groups though.
  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,213 Member
    Strength training is basically lifting weights. I use the term "strength train" because it includes using the machines (vs dumbbells or squat rack, which I also use). So when you got "more toned but didn't lose any weight", did it not satisfy you? I can understand how the number on the scale can get into your head, but changing your body composition (more muscle, less fat) is the real goal for most of us.
  • vkdaya
    vkdaya Posts: 8 Member
    edited March 2018
    @goldthistime
    Well, i do have a back problem that makes lifting weights without a trainer guiding me through, a bit dangerous. I use a 2set of 3kg each at home and that's about all the weights i lift currently.

    And yes, it did make me feel better, but as you can imagine after a weight loss of 45+kilos so rapidly i was left with some loose skin, so even when i toned from working out, i was nowhere near what i would consider a beach body, so to be honest, i wasn't satisfied.

    And i know it's going to take years till i am able to get rid all the lose skin which luckily isn't that much, so i want to at least feel awesome when i'm wearing clothes. At 65 kilos i see the fat in my thighs (you can see from the last pic on the one i posted) some extra weight on my arms and belly.
  • vkdaya
    vkdaya Posts: 8 Member
    @PAV8888 Thank you for your reply :)

    Ideally, i would like to be able to work with a personal trainer to guide me through, but at this point in life it would be very difficult to do so. I will research more about strength training and see if i could use some of it on my daily work out routine.

    The reason behind my false image about my self, is my really low confidence. That has nothing to do with how others percieve me, but it's a problem i've been dealing with my whole life. I'm trying not to obsess over what i eat anymore, like i used to (example i didn't eat anything fried, no oil, no sodas, no white rice or pasta for a year straight at 2016) but i've been doing good for the whole 2017 and up until today, i've been eating almost every food you can think of, but always trying to do in moderation and i stopped weighing my self every day, i do once a week now.

    I don't want to get thinner and thinner, in fact when i was 56 i felt too skinny for what i percieve as the ideal body for my self. At 60 kilos i felt great about my self and it wasn't hard for me to maintain. I could slip 1-2 days a week and still not gain weight. I don't really like meat and it wasn't a big part of my diet. When i got my health issues, i had high needs of protein so i switched to a heavy in meat lifestyle, which made me go up to 65. There's no need for that much meat anymore, i'm perfectly fine with twice a week, but ever since i switched back to a diet that i should be losing weight, i don't. And i get easily discouraged by that.
  • Starflight00
    Starflight00 Posts: 112 Member
    edited March 2018
    Most of the doctors i've seen, think that anywhere from 60 to 70 would be healthy, but i don't feel comfortable with my body at 65kilos.

    Sounds like your doctors are looking only at your BMI.

    I started MFP with 62.4 kg on the scale, feeling extremely fat and in fact I was. I had 34% of body fat and stomach circumference of about 90 cm both of which are red flags for obesity. My BMI though was right in the middle of healthy weight range. 4 months later I'm at 57.7 still carrying around about 29% fat, so next step for me is doing recomp: replacing that fat with muscle which I barely have right now, it seems.

    Find yourself a good dietitian that sees the whole picture and try doing at least some way of recomp, like many suggested here. Also invest in good kitchen scale and a decent "human" scale. Calculate your daily cal allowance on IIFYM.com and invest in a Fitbit (which is very accurate in estimating cals you burn).

    Re: "human" scale: I got myself Omron BF511 which is probably still not perfect, but it has hand held electrodes, therefore measuring body comp in whole body, not just your legs.
    ion886bem6nw.png

    Good luck!

  • vkdaya
    vkdaya Posts: 8 Member
    @Starflight00 Thank you so much, this helped me a lot to figure out why i feel fat.

    I guess that's the best think i could do. I feel as you described, just by looking at the mirror, i mostly see fat and not muscle. That's why i dont like how i look at all. I may not be overweight by BMI or scales, but i don't see a healthy body. I see fat, pretty much everywhere. I know i have stored fat on my tummy and that's not what i'm reffering to (it's my most problematic area and needs a lot of work) but i see fat on my thighs, butt arms etc that i didn't have when i was 60 kilos.

  • Starflight00
    Starflight00 Posts: 112 Member
    You're very welcome, @vkdaya ! Tummy fat is the worst: extremely unhealthy and usually what triggers us girls to feel fat (I totally got congratulations on being pregnant once). Just remember you can't spot reduce fat and that pouch will probably go as last, but it will go. And you have to do it for yourself, not others. Others come and go, you are your longest commitment, don't forget that.

    I've sent you friend request, feel free to send me a PM if you want.
  • vkdaya
    vkdaya Posts: 8 Member
    edited March 2018
    @PAV8888 I never thought i would be able to lose weight in the first place. That's why my goal was 70kilos when i started. I never thought i could make it. If you told me 3 years ago that i would be 65 kilos i would have laughed. It's very motivating reading your words about my journey, helps me to keep being strong and not give up.

    I'm definitely in need of a re-composition so i will start gathering all the info i need and see what i should do next.
    I really appreciate everyone commenting, you are all giving me a prespective on this matter that i would not have otherwise.

  • goldthistime
    goldthistime Posts: 3,213 Member
    vkdaya wrote: »
    @goldthistime
    Well, i do have a back problem that makes lifting weights without a trainer guiding me through, a bit dangerous. I use a 2set of 3kg each at home and that's about all the weights i lift currently.

    And yes, it did make me feel better, but as you can imagine after a weight loss of 45+kilos so rapidly i was left with some loose skin, so even when i toned from working out, i was nowhere near what i would consider a beach body, so to be honest, i wasn't satisfied.

    And i know it's going to take years till i am able to get rid all the lose skin which luckily isn't that much, so i want to at least feel awesome when i'm wearing clothes. At 65 kilos i see the fat in my thighs (you can see from the last pic on the one i posted) some extra weight on my arms and belly.

    I’m no expert on strength training, but let me parrot the advice I see here frequently “follow a progressive load strength training routine”.

    Back problems add complexity. I have them too, and in fact i just hurt my back on Friday doing a deadlift incorrectly so I’m taking a few days off.

    This is the second time I’ve hurt it while trying to follow a program. The first time it was StrongLifts 5x5, and this time New Rules For Lifting For Women.

    Although I think you’re wise to want a trainer to help you set up a routine that protects your back, I’m wondering if there are guidelines that people like you and I can follow if we either can’t afford a trainer or don’t want one for some other reason at this time.

    For me, I can get too hung up on the “progression” part and find myself doing the lifts too quickly (using momentum to cheat), and moving up in weight before I’m actually ready.

    Anyone have advice for OP and I?
  • Starflight00
    Starflight00 Posts: 112 Member
    I've just recently bought "Thinner Leaner Stronger" and he focuses on proper form of squat and deadlift, among others.

    I'm a complete beginner and have yet to start strength training, but I also have back issues (like everyone nowadays, it seems), I will let you know how it goes.
  • Azercord
    Azercord Posts: 573 Member
    I also would suggest strength training. It really helps form the body and allows you to "feel good" and really ignore the scale. While I do stick to my maintenance range it has slowly increased with time because I have increased my muscle mass while dropping my body fat. With the strength training you can move you body easier because it is overall stronger. Even with back issues, yes you have to take things slow and watch form but it can be done. I have a bad disk between my L5/S1 and it used to give me lots of issues but after lots of training I now only have issues once or twice a year despite deadlifts and squatting 1.5 times my bodyweight every week.

    You look great at 65 kilos, work with your body, start learning to ignore the scale, and work towards strengthening your muscles so that you can move freely and feel great again.
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