My new WHY

anyWendy · March 2018

So, I spent some time journaling this morning, articulating why it is important to me to achieve and maintain a healthy weight (I am currently 181, down from 225, 5'8", so 164 will be a healthy BMI).

Here's what I realized:
I am someone who puts a lot of effort into my own personal development, physically, mentally, spiritually, etc. I want the body that people see to be one that is congruent with the level of effort that I am putting in. When someone looks at me, or I look at myself, I want to see someone that is motivated, disciplined, and successful. To ME, that requires a healthy weight and a fit and strong body.

This way of thinking about it is new to me, but is very motivating.

What is your WHY?

Seffell · March 2018

I think my why is exactly as yours. However lately I've been thinking more and more about happiness. And I think these three (motivated, disciplined and successful) do not necesserily lead to happiness. I've been pushing myself my whole life to a achieve these and I can't say I'm happier. I think I need to be more peaceful with myself and stop being so requiring of myself.

Well, I'm not there yet so my why's are still these three but I want this to change.

conniemaxwell5 · March 2018

I have a few WHY's:
My husband has rheumatoid arthritis. At some point I will need to be strong and fit for him.
My physical appearance doesn't line up with who I am as a person (similar to the OP's WHY).
I'm tired of being tired.
I'm tired of being weak.
And my vanity reason - clothes. I really hate "fat" clothes.

JeromeBarry1 · March 2018

The Why that got me started was that my dumb luck which had kept me alive all the years prior had expired. If I wanted to remain among the living, I had to act like it.

solieco1 · March 2018

This really spoke to me today. Thank you so much. Struggling to find my way and my why today and your words could have been mine and I needed them.

150poundsofme · March 2018

Great post. My why? This weekend I should cross off one of my why's - not needing a seat belt extender on an airplane. I want to live a long life so I will be here for my children. I identify myself as being overweight. And I think that is how others see me. 45 years I have, every single day, been focused on losing weight. It would be great to be thinking of something else or doing something else. My why also is to be proud of myself and like what I see in my reflection.

LivingtheLeanDream · March 2018

My main WHY was so that I could be fit and healthy so hopefully age better... started my fitness journey in 2012 and since 2013 have been fit, healthy and maintaining my goal weight range

I'm almost 49 and I feel better than ever

newheavensearth · March 2018

To beat my family history of heart disease, high blood pressure and diabetes. I just found out several relatives have been in and out of hospitals with shunts, bypass surgery, and one is waiting for a transplant, all due to obesity. One passed away at 52 from heart problems.

I want to feel good about myself. Even though no one has said anything I'm tired of that fattest person in the room feeling.

I have a bikini now. It fits but I want to look good in it.

I want to be the role model of moderation for my overweight son. I look at his weight and feel like I failed as a parent. I feel like I can't tell him anything until I get myself together.

CarvedTones · March 2018

anyWendy wrote: »

So, I spent some time journaling this morning, articulating why it is important to me to achieve and maintain a healthy weight (I am currently 181, down from 225, 5'8", so 164 will be a healthy BMI).

Almost exactly my stats. I am also 5'8". I was 223 and age 58 when I started dieting this time. I am 59 now and weigh ~163. Still going to lose just a bit more, but very slowly. I don't want to go into my 60s overweight; I want to do everything I can to improve the odds of making it to retirement and then having a long active retirement. I also didn't like what I saw in the mirror and didn't like the image I project. I may have my job end and need to find one more before retirement. I already have to get past ageism (even though it is illegal, there is still implicit bias). Being overweight does flavor the impression you make and usually not in a good way. But it is mostly about my health.

CMNVA · March 2018

I think maybe I don't have a "WHY."

I've never really had any lifelong weight issues, but since my 40s, I am constantly 10-20 lbs overweight. I don't really ever care how people see me. It's how I see myself, or rather how I feel. I am back on my plan now after blowing it over the holidays and putting the weight on. I just "feel" gross. I actually look okay in my clothes.

So the "why" is a feeling for me.

jasondwightpowell · March 2018

First and foremost - congratulations. It looks like your why is paying off. Keep up the great work.

At 44 years old my "WHY" is a 5 year old little girl. I want to be around to see her grow up so she changed my outlook on how I should be/act. I want to be a role model / leader for her. I want to show her that an active lifestyle is a good lifestyle and eating right and taking good care of yourself by being active and exercising is a key factor in success.

Kingsfan760 · March 2018

My WHY was in a form of a heart attack and my wife. Even after the stent for my heart, I gained even more weight feeling sorry for myself, BUT then something snapped in me in Jan. I have been on MFP making good progress, losing inches and lbs., working out in the gym. I'm getting into shape and heading in the right direction before my retirement. SW 250, now 233 and getting better each day. My other WHY is the support and motivation from this forum.

anyWendy · March 2018

gebeziseva wrote: »

I think my why is exactly as yours. However lately I've been thinking more and more about happiness. And I think these three (motivated, disciplined and successful) do not necesserily lead to happiness. I've been pushing myself my whole life to a achieve these and I can't say I'm happier. I think I need to be more peaceful with myself and stop being so requiring of myself.

Well, I'm not there yet so my why's are still these three but I want this to change.

Thanks for sharing. This really got me thinking. For me, motivated, disciplined, and successful does not have to be at odds with peaceful and happy. I am definitely a type A high achiever, but part of how I achieve my goals is through meditation, affirmations, and visualization. These help me stay centered and become the best version of myself.

Good luck finding your peace and happiness!

anyWendy · March 2018

CarvedTones wrote: »

anyWendy wrote: »

So, I spent some time journaling this morning, articulating why it is important to me to achieve and maintain a healthy weight (I am currently 181, down from 225, 5'8", so 164 will be a healthy BMI).

Almost exactly my stats. I am also 5'8". I was 223 and age 58 when I started dieting this time. I am 59 now and weigh ~163. Still going to lose just a bit more, but very slowly. I don't want to go into my 60s overweight; I want to do everything I can to improve the odds of making it to retirement and then having a long active retirement. I also didn't like what I saw in the mirror and didn't like the image I project. I may have my job end and need to find one more before retirement. I already have to get past ageism (even though it is illegal, there is still implicit bias). Being overweight does flavor the impression you make and usually not in a good way. But it is mostly about my health.

Cheers to us! Congrats on your loss and a great perspective.

Dnarules · March 2018

JeromeBarry1 wrote: »

The Why that got me started was that my dumb luck which had kept me alive all the years prior had expired. If I wanted to remain among the living, I had to act like it.

I really identify with this one. For the previous two years or so, I managed to just ignore the increasing signs that my weight was a serious problem (BP moving to prehypertensive and then approaching hypertensive, getting winded on stairs or small hills, achilles tendonitis, and a slightly elevated A1C). I started BP medication in June 2017. But then in August I had an episode with my vision and heard the words TIA (ministroke). The MRI showed no evidence of a ministroke, but that was a huge wake up call. I've lost 30 pounds so far.

JustinAnimal · March 2018

anyWendy wrote: »

So, I spent some time journaling this morning, articulating why it is important to me to achieve and maintain a healthy weight (I am currently 181, down from 225, 5'8", so 164 will be a healthy BMI).

Here's what I realized:
I am someone who puts a lot of effort into my own personal development, physically, mentally, spiritually, etc. I want the body that people see to be one that is congruent with the level of effort that I am putting in. When someone looks at me, or I look at myself, I want to see someone that is motivated, disciplined, and successful. To ME, that requires a healthy weight and a fit and strong body.

This way of thinking about it is new to me, but is very motivating.

What is your WHY?

I don't know. I think I like your why better than mine. That was a good and a thoughtful reason.

1houndgal · March 2018

My why is for my health both mentally and physically.

HoneyBadger302 · March 2018

My biggest "why" and motivator right now is racing. Being fit and in shape is going to be absolutely essential if I want to reach my goals.

After that, it's simply the fact that I feel better. The more active I am, the more energetic I feel throughout the day and it affects my mood, too.

I see my mother (who's never been much for physical activity outside of the very occasional hike) and how much things like rough terrain really give her problems, and I don't want to be like that at her age.

Unknown · March 2018

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lkpducky · March 2018

My old and ongoing WHY is to stop being plump, plain and dowdy.

My new and now far more important WHY is to avoid getting type 2 diabetes. Type 2 runs in my family. For the first time, I had an HbA1c reading in the pre-diabetic range. I got that result back in January. I really need to be extra careful from now on.

gearhead426hemi · March 2018

My "WHY" is my family. I want to be able to enjoy a long life with my wife, kids and someday my grandkids. I don't focus so much on the weight or a perfect diet but how I feel when I am out with my family. When we go mountain biking, kayaking or hiking or whatever I want to feel good and happy and be able to enjoy the day without feeling tired or out of breath.

ahoy_m8 · March 2018

gebeziseva wrote: »

I think my why is exactly as yours. However lately I've been thinking more and more about happiness. And I think these three (motivated, disciplined and successful) do not necesserily lead to happiness. I've been pushing myself my whole life to a achieve these and I can't say I'm happier. I think I need to be more peaceful with myself and stop being so requiring of myself.

Well, I'm not there yet so my why's are still these three but I want this to change.

Thank you for this thoughtful reply. It reminds me of an old monastic wisdom that freedom can only be known within the context of discipline. Eg am I free to drop everything and run a 10k right now? If I have a discipline of running regularly, I have the freedom to make that choice. If I always postpone exercise and am in poor condition, that option really isn’t even on the table for me to choose it, even if I wanted to. The monks meant it in a spiritual way, e.g. in a clutch moment do I have the strength of character (or faith) to pick the compassionate response? If my practice is always to put myself first, probably not (I.e. no choice, stuck being selfish). If I have a habit of considering the needs of others, I have freedom to choose a response. We think freedom is doing what you want when you want, giving in to all impulses, but it’s actually the opposite. Giving in to impulses makes us slaves to them. Freedom is having lots of choices —the power to choose to indulge an impulse or to choose to resist it instead.

Freedom and happiness aren’t the same thing, but in a similar way, I do feel discipline makes contentment, peace and happiness possible. Maybe this says something about how I perceive happiness (and how it relates to freedom). You’ve given me something to ponder.

jefamer2017 · March 2018

Because I want to be able to walk well into old age. I want to rollerblade again, I am too heavy and have little core strength. I want to wear a swim suit without a cover up. I really would like abs too, but that's may never happen.

MegaMooseEsq · March 2018

I was raised to define your worth by your successes in life, primarily professionally and financially. When I went to law school in 2009 after floating around career-wise for a few years, I immediately knew I'd found my calling. A year later I met my spouse and we immediately hit it off. And then things started going off plan - jobs I'd hoped to get didn't come through, grades fell a bit, friends got busier and distant, nights out got later and later, my mental health got shakier and shakier, and my weight started going up and up and up. This continued through graduation in 2012 and four more years of regular interviewing and striking out. And then it was the beginning of 2017 and I realized that I had nothing to show for the past two years but a stack of rejection letters, a big old belly, crummy lab results, and the beginning (middle?) of a drinking problem. So I decided to get my *kitten* together, take control of what I could, and start making some changes in my life, with my health front-and-center. To frame it another way, proving to myself that I was capable of growth and happiness even without career success was my why.

My new WHY

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