I missed my goal

blnorman29
blnorman29 Posts: 148 Member
edited October 1 in Motivation and Support
By 3.6 pounds. My first MFP goal was to hit Onederland by today, my fifth wedding anniversary. This morning I weighed in at 203.5. I'm really disappointed and beating myself up for not pushing hard enough to hit this. I also think my splurge over the weekend and my imprecise portion control contributed to my failure. Today is Day 4 of Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred, but I wish I had started it on the 1st like I originally planned to. I'm trying really hard to not just throw in the towel and quit.

How did you handle missing a goal? Any words of advice?

Replies

  • godroxmysox
    godroxmysox Posts: 1,491 Member
    Just look at how far you've come and how close you are to your goal. Don't let it get you down! Keep your chin up!
  • kr3851
    kr3851 Posts: 994 Member
    I revise my goals all the time. I have a magic number and a magic date in my head, but honestly, I'm not going to starve myself for two weeks before my goal just to get there. This 'game' continues long after you reach your goal... so if it takes you a couple more weeks to get there, in the grand scheme of things, is it really going to matter that much? What matters most is forming the healthy habits that will take you through the rest of your life, not the number on the scale.

    It's good to set goals, but you don't have to feel awful if you don't achieve them. You know what you need to do now, so set yourself another goal and work out how you can achieve it. Are you going to give up because you're 3 pounds short? I really hope not!
  • BerkleyJL
    BerkleyJL Posts: 12
    Missing a goal can be really frustrating, but don't let it get you down. It sounds like you've identified possible causes for missing the goal. Set a new goal and focus on those issues...if you're right about why you missed you could succeed the next time.

    Don't admit defeat! There's a whole community here to help.
  • NKF92879
    NKF92879 Posts: 601 Member
    Honestly? My goals aren't timed. I didn't put on this 15-20 pounds in 6 months, why should I take it off in 6 months? As long as the scale is going down, I don't worry too much about how fast/slow it's moving. Hang in there. You got this!
  • rainbowbuggy
    rainbowbuggy Posts: 320
    You didn't fail! . Be proud of what you have accomplished! You've done great. MFP is a estimate not a guarantee. You look great and throwing in the towel won't get you any closer to the goal right?

    I always tell myself.... "The only way I fail is if I give up".....
  • jlc1243
    jlc1243 Posts: 272 Member
    When I lost weight before I always beat myself up when I missed goals, but you just can't do it. I think this is why i've failed so many times before. You have to live in the successes you have acheived. Just like any goal a plan to get there always helps. And a long the way, if you need to re-adjust, just do it, make a plan and move on. You're doing fantastic! Don't give up.
  • 1546mel
    1546mel Posts: 191
    Find out what you did wrong and recommit to doing it right. If you give up you will not hit your goals. You need to do something differently. Perhaps portion control is the issue as you pointed out. I do that all of the time, sit down for dinner, eat extra portions and then beat myself up over that. Last night i had 1-1/2 brats and am mad at myself for that, but all you can do is refocus daily and build on the amount of days that you do it correctly. Weight loss is hard, portion control is hard, and self-control is the hardest. You will get there! I have been where you are many times in trying to lose weight.
  • jlc1243
    jlc1243 Posts: 272 Member
    I revise my goals all the time. I have a magic number and a magic date in my head, but honestly, I'm not going to starve myself for two weeks before my goal just to get there. This 'game' continues long after you reach your goal... so if it takes you a couple more weeks to get there, in the grand scheme of things, is it really going to matter that much? What matters most is forming the healthy habits that will take you through the rest of your life, not the number on the scale.

    It's good to set goals, but you don't have to feel awful if you don't achieve them. You know what you need to do now, so set yourself another goal and work out how you can achieve it. Are you going to give up because you're 3 pounds short? I really hope not!

    Great words of advice!!!!
  • Aloycia
    Aloycia Posts: 4
    Do not give up. We all have bad weeks. Keep pushing yourself and you will start to see the pound coming off.
  • zml_mom
    zml_mom Posts: 270 Member
    I would worry about it
    I only set 1 goal to a specific date and after I hit that I made all my other goals just a number and no set date that way I don't get upset over it.

    good luck and just think about why your doing this
  • pinkpowerrangerdede
    pinkpowerrangerdede Posts: 20
    happy anniversary!!! yeah!!! you can do it!!!! just keep doing what you've been doing...... it will be ok!! hugs, dede
  • lovebeinGIGI
    lovebeinGIGI Posts: 72 Member
    First of all, stop beating yourself up and do not quit and throw in the towel!! My journey has taken 2 years to get where I am!! In the past, I did lose it fast only to gain it back plus some, several times for that matter! This time, I was determined to take it slow!!

    The first year, I only lost 20lb!! Then, the second year, I decided to make more changes and lost the other 54lb in little over a year!! I'm happier for losing it slowly. Yes, I'd love to see the scale go down faster! But I know this time, losing it slowly the right way, it is more likely to stay off for good!!

    Don't give up! And don't be too hard on yourself!!! Slow and steady! Celebrate those times you see the changes and just relax when you don't.

    Good luck to you!!!!
    God Bless!
  • wxkris
    wxkris Posts: 57
    Progress, NOT perfection!
  • sue817
    sue817 Posts: 3 Member
    Stop beating yourself up! You are trying and that is all that matters. On any fitness plan there are highs and lows. I know this because I have been here and done that! The main thing to keep before you is that you are trying to change/improve and that is all that matters. Change is hard but just keep on keeping on-YOU CAN DO THIS!!! Hang in there!!!! Don't give up-that's the easy thing to do!
  • cruiseking
    cruiseking Posts: 338 Member
    BIG picture. Today is a new day, a new calorie count, a new opportunity. Where will you be on your next anniversary? You can only change, what you can change. We all have regrets; but I choose to rip the rear view mirror off the windshield. Good luck, and start thinking of your next anniversary. Be good to yourself. No regrets!
  • BeautyFromPain
    BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
    I found this quote today - it really amazed me :D

    "You're right. It is easier to eat pizza than to run on the treadmill. It's easier to turn to ice cream rather than people for support. It's easier to say, "F*** it I give up" than to say "F*** this, I can do it." So you know what? I'm not going to sit here and tell you day after day that you can do this. If you don't believe that you can, then you can't. That's the honest truth. You need to do this for you. And if you don't want it enough, then you sure as hell won't achieve it. So take the easy way out and remain unhealthy and continue to gain weight because you can't realise that you are the only one hurting yourself. I didn't say it would be easy, I said it would be worth it."
  • PhilipByrne
    PhilipByrne Posts: 276 Member
    There's no point in beating yourself up and concentrating on the 'what ifs'.

    Start from today and get back in the game. You're doing well, but remember it's a change of lifestyle that is the ultimate goal not the race to a goal weight.

    G'luck
    P
  • dcgonz
    dcgonz Posts: 174 Member
    First of all you should congratulate yourself for making the decision to lose weight, get healthy, and for losing the weight you have so far. Setting dates to be at a certain weight, I feel, can sometimes be more of a hindrance. This journey that you are on should not be for two, three or four months. You are learning a whole new lifestyle and way of living. If you don't reach a goal by a certain date know that if you keep on your path you will eventually get there.

    Take this as a learning opportunity to stick to your plans. If you set a date to start a new exercise plan follow through. But if you miss that date don't just give up. Your health is too important for that. You know if this weight loss thing was easy, everyone would do it. It's not, it hard work so just hang in there and keep going!

    "A man is not finished when he is defeated. He is finished when he quits"

    Diana
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
    I'm sorry, dear. I can relate. I tend not to put dates on my goals for fear I'll be so discouraged if I don't make it. I try to focus more on what I've accomplished, in any amount of time. But I still obsess over how much I lose (or don't lose) per week. It's a tough struggle. I'm about where you are. I've been so stinking close to ONEderland for months now. Within 5 lbs of it. But you can't let it get you down too much. No going back, I say. I'll never weigh that much again.

    Enjoy your anniversary. And try not to let it get to you. You're doing great, even if you didn't quite reach this particular goal.
  • lolainlondon
    lolainlondon Posts: 160 Member
    As everyone else says, goals slip sometimes and shift. So long as the scales are going down and the belt is going in, don't beat yourself up. This isn't about losing a few pounds, it's about changing your lifestyle. And I notice from your profile that you joined in July. Maybe the number of pounds you hoped to lose was too high? You've lost 13 pounds in (at the most) a month and a half. That's great. It's not necessarily losing weight that you didn't do well, it was setting an overly optimistic goal.
  • kapeluza
    kapeluza Posts: 3,434 Member
    I don't beat up myself over it, on the contrary, I try hard to meet my next goal! I think you are being way to hard on yourself! Whatever you do, do NOT quit! Remember this, "A year from now you will wish you had started today"!
  • catherine1979
    catherine1979 Posts: 704 Member
    I was constantly beating myself up for missing goals. So my goals are no longer timed. I will lose weight at the rate my body wants to and no faster. I eat well, I exercise, and I see progress every day, even though the scale may not tell me so.

    Perhaps the progress is that I can run further without getting winded, or that I can buy a smaller size of clothes. Maybe the progress is that I said no to dessert.

    There are so many things that are important when you are losing weight to get healthy. After losing 94 pounds (39 of those on MFP) I now realize that not all of my victories are going to be on the scale, and sometimes the scale doesn't tell the whole story. My advice is to have weight goals, but maybe say "I want to see 199 in August" instead of "I want to see 199 by August 11."

    You have obviously done a lot of hard work already, so don't be too hard on yourself. Best of luck!
  • porffor
    porffor Posts: 1,210 Member
    Happy Anniversary! :)
    You have done brilliantly well and achieved a healthier body in time for your anniversary. Every lb lost is a triumph so don't feel bad about not hitting a number. Keep on track and they'll be gone in no time anyway.

    Hope you have a lovely celebration with your hubby.
  • blnorman29
    blnorman29 Posts: 148 Member
    Thanks everyone. You guys are so awesome. That's why I came here instead of consolling myself by eating donuts in the conference room or something. I know I can do it, I guess I just want that instant gratification that comes so easily in other things, like when you give into the craving to have potato chips instead of carrot sticks. I love both, but it's easier to eat the chips. I love working towards these goals, timed or not, but it's easier to just keep living like I was before, getting fatter and fatter.

    Thanks for all the encouragement and advice. I know a year from now those 3 pounds will be gone if I just get back on the horse now.
  • pazzescauna1
    pazzescauna1 Posts: 43 Member
    "If at first you don't succeed-- TRY AGAIN!"

    Look, no one ever said losing weight would be the easiest thing in the world. Don't beat yourself up, instead, use your missed goal as an opportunity to try again. Try something new. Don't have a specified day to splurge. Try only splurging on special days-- Valentines Day, an anniversary, birthday, or major holiday.

    Ask yourself why you didn't succeed. Did you notice I did not use the words "fail or failure"? The truth is that you're doing your best, and that's all that can be done.

    Best of luck to you. Don't give up-- you will SUCCEED.
  • cantjustcant
    cantjustcant Posts: 1,027 Member
    Dont you DARE beat yourself up chick! That's my job! 3.6 pounds!?!?!?! Are you kidding me? That is close enough! stop worrying about the number and think about the results! Did you check your measurements?

    Every day I say....Screw JM and her shred. Then I think about the crap you will give me if you don't see it logged!

    You are my inspiration and drive! Now say one more negative thought and I will have to slap you around a bit....you know....after I can move my arms again....stupid JM
  • blnorman29
    blnorman29 Posts: 148 Member
    Ha! My arms aren't too bad, it's my thighs that are killing me! I hate that woman.
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