Pls help

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I can’t actually believe I’m going to talk about this but I think I need the support to help me through. Ok so I am pretty sure I seem to want to sabotage my success so far. I’ve been slipping for about two weeks gradually and slowly eating more of the wrong things. Well it’s 4am and I have just binged on a mammoth chocolate marathon. Maybe 1000 cals or more. I couldn’t stop. The more I felt guilty the more I ate. I feel utterly disgusted with myself. I’ve hidden wrappers. I’ve become my 15 yr old self I’m scared where it will end. I want to be sick. It’s taking all my strength not to. I’m so sorry if this isn’t the right place to talk. I am so lonely I didn’t know where else to turn. I know it seems dramatic and I should probably just have a stern word with myself and get a grip. I guess I’m just scared this will become a thing again. I battled those demons along time. Sorry if this post isn’t allowed. And sorry if I have over shared or I don’t know, I am babbling on. so will stop and hope just getting it off my chest has been enough for tonight. Sorry

Replies

  • MichelleSilverleaf
    MichelleSilverleaf Posts: 2,029 Member
    Especially if you have a history with binging, it would be a good idea to talk to a professional who can help you with all of this. It's most definitely not a matter of 'toughen up buttercup'. That being said, I'm curious at what kind of deficit you're trying to keep. It's not uncommon for some binges to be triggered by steep deficits and a lot of unnecessary restrictions. 'Right' and 'wrong' thinking can sometimes be more harmful than not.
  • courtneyfabulous
    courtneyfabulous Posts: 1,863 Member
    www.betterhelp.com
  • courtneyfabulous
    courtneyfabulous Posts: 1,863 Member
    Perhaps you are restricting too much and that led to this binge. Trying to eat too clean and too much of a caloric deficit sets you up for failure. I would try a very mild deficit and make room for treats in moderation Daily. I make room in my calories & macros for some chocolate or something sweet EVERY DAY and that helps me never feel deprived while still getting results.
  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,145 Member
    You’ve gotten good advice so far and I don’t have anything to add to that. I just wanted to jump in to say that there’s certainly nothing wrong with posting this here.