Silly question #2 (since I'm on a roll) "Friends"

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4Pop
4Pop Posts: 53 Member
in Getting Started
What is the big deal with the whole "friends" thing? I see new members here begging others to be their friends.

I'm older than many here I suppose, which may play a part of why I don't understand, and I've never been on the book of face, twitter, or any of the rest of the ones like those (where I hear others talking about the whole "friends" thing).

Could someone give me some cliff-notes? What benefit for either party is there for becoming "friends", or is it just a status thing? What are the down-sides, if any?

Again, thanks!

Replies

  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
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    It's nothing deep. Some people enjoy socializing with others online. They either like the personal connection or they find that online support makes it easier for them to focus on their goals.

    It's a benefit if you enjoy connecting with others that way. If you have a special interest or situation and your friends are in the same boat, you may also get the benefit of tips or anecdotes that are useful for your own weight control/fitness efforts.

    The downside? The same as any online socialization, I suppose.
  • baybonzon
    baybonzon Posts: 2 Member
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    Its a motivational support . Its nice to know that there are people out there thats trying to do something about their weight, and knowing there are ups and downs, but at the end of the day at least we try.
  • 4Pop
    4Pop Posts: 53 Member
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    janejellyroll wrote: »
    It's nothing deep. Some people enjoy socializing with others online. They either like the personal connection or they find that online support makes it easier for them to focus on their goals.

    It's a benefit if you enjoy connecting with others that way. If you have a special interest or situation and your friends are in the same boat, you may also get the benefit of tips or anecdotes that are useful for your own weight control/fitness efforts.

    The downside? The same as any online socialization, I suppose.

    OK, thanks, but I guess I just don't understand. We're all here on this site, talking back and forth, sharing interests in different threads, some of us asking for advice/help, others giving/offering it. I'm just not seeing where the "friends" thing plays into it all? Not asking for any further explanation, as I likely wouldn't understand.

    I guess it's just an "I like you", unless you make me mad, then I "unfriend" you, and whoever has the most friends gets the popularity award? :)

    lol, I've made myself feel like one of those women on tv...

    That's not how this works, that's not how any of this works....
  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,874 Member
    edited June 2018
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    4Pop wrote: »
    janejellyroll wrote: »
    It's nothing deep. Some people enjoy socializing with others online. They either like the personal connection or they find that online support makes it easier for them to focus on their goals.

    It's a benefit if you enjoy connecting with others that way. If you have a special interest or situation and your friends are in the same boat, you may also get the benefit of tips or anecdotes that are useful for your own weight control/fitness efforts.

    The downside? The same as any online socialization, I suppose.

    OK, thanks, but I guess I just don't understand. We're all here on this site, talking back and forth, sharing interests in different threads, some of us asking for advice/help, others giving/offering it. I'm just not seeing where the "friends" thing plays into it all? Not asking for any further explanation, as I likely wouldn't understand.

    I guess it's just an "I like you", unless you make me mad, then I "unfriend" you, and whoever has the most friends gets the popularity award? :)

    lol, I've made myself feel like one of those women on tv...

    That's not how this works, that's not how any of this works....

    There's a social feed, somewhat similar to Facebook, where automatic updates for things like closing your food diary and logging exercise go. You can also post status updates and pictures. All this can be liked and commented on by your friends, and vice versa (you also see their activity, if they've enabled it). I'm not opposed to friend requests and will generally accept them if they seem like genuine users and not 'friend collectors,' but for my part, my feed is insanely boring.
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
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    There are people who want friends, and people that don't. Some members are very social, others keep to themselves. No big mystery. You can do whatever makes you comfortable. On your newsfeed your friends can leave messages or ask questions, or ask for support if they're going through a difficult time. You see if they're exercising, or if they've lost weight, or are having a hard time. There are lots of options--take your pick. There are also lots of "older" folks.
  • 4Pop
    4Pop Posts: 53 Member
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    janejellyroll wrote: »
    4Pop wrote: »

    I guess it's just an "I like you", unless you make me mad, then I "unfriend" you, and whoever has the most friends gets the popularity award? :)

    lol, I've made myself feel like one of those women on tv...

    That's not how this works, that's not how any of this works....

    I'm not saying that nobody is like that, but I feel like you're bending over backwards to attribute the worst possible motivation to people who simply prefer to use some features of the website that you don't.

    When you are "friends" with someone, you can see their status updates and, in some cases, information about when they exercise, their most recent weight accomplishments, and their food diary. You can also see how many days they've logged in. So if someone is motivated by being cheered on by others or cheering others on when goals are met, it's something they might enjoy.

    It doesn't necessarily come down to wanting to control others with unfriending or wanting to get the most friends.



    I think you've misunderstood my post, but that's OK. I wasn't talking bad about those who choose to participate in the whole thing, was simply trying to understand it (again, since I've never taken part in social media outside of a few forums of interest).

    I'll just leave it, and this thread at that. Wasn't my intention to insult anyone.

    Thanks


  • MichelleWithMoxie
    MichelleWithMoxie Posts: 1,817 Member
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    it's really not that serious. it's for pure entertainment on your news feed. some keep super small friends, some have hundreds. to each their own. *shrug*
  • hippysprout
    hippysprout Posts: 1,446 Member
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    4Pop wrote: »
    I think you've misunderstood my post

    Well it was easy to misunderstand, I did too. It seemed like you were mocking the support system here by downplaying it into a popularity contest:

    4Pop wrote: »
    I guess it's just an "I like you", unless you make me mad, then I "unfriend" you, and whoever has the most friends gets the popularity award? :)

    But as you didn't intend to offend, then no worries. This isn't like facebook where the drama llama regularly makes an appearance on a newsfeed. At least, my newsfeed isn't.

    I mean, feel free to send me a friend request :p
  • FibroHiker
    FibroHiker Posts: 377 Member
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    I had been trying to do this on my own for about 18 months. I not only didn't lose any weight, but gained 10 pounds in that time. My FitBit keeps telling me that I haven't lost any weight since April. It's referring to April 2017 when I got it.

    I figured it was about time that I start adding people for inspiration, getting feedback, getting advice, commiserating, and having some accountability.
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
    edited June 2018
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    I like milling around and shooting the breeze with everyone out here in the living room.
  • Kim_S_G
    Kim_S_G Posts: 120 Member
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    4Pop wrote: »
    janejellyroll wrote: »
    It's nothing deep. Some people enjoy socializing with others online. They either like the personal connection or they find that online support makes it easier for them to focus on their goals.

    It's a benefit if you enjoy connecting with others that way. If you have a special interest or situation and your friends are in the same boat, you may also get the benefit of tips or anecdotes that are useful for your own weight control/fitness efforts.

    The downside? The same as any online socialization, I suppose.

    OK, thanks, but I guess I just don't understand. We're all here on this site, talking back and forth, sharing interests in different threads, some of us asking for advice/help, others giving/offering it. I'm just not seeing where the "friends" thing plays into it all? Not asking for any further explanation, as I likely wouldn't understand.

    I guess it's just an "I like you", unless you make me mad, then I "unfriend" you, and whoever has the most friends gets the popularity award? :)

    lol, I've made myself feel like one of those women on tv...

    That's not how this works, that's not how any of this works....

    I think I understand what you are saying/asking. The link under the "Community" tab to "Find Friends" tells you nothing about what being a "friend" entails. I, too, don't see how the "friends" thing works on the forums. But, my guess is that the friends feature is really not used so much with the forums as it is with your newsfeed. On the "Home" screen underneath your "Daily Summary" is your "Newsfeed". You will see things like calories burned during during your workouts, pounds lost etc. You can also write anything you want to share - like "dropped a pants size!". I think when you are friends with someone, they can see your newsfeed and comment to cheer you on.

    Having said all that, I am very much an introvert and do not have "friends" on MFP, so I am not sure how the friends feature works here either.

    For what it's worth, I think your post has been misunderstood by some.

  • ChozoSpectre
    ChozoSpectre Posts: 19 Member
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    Support, encouragement, entertainment.

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