Over my PITY PARTY

carrie145
carrie145 Posts: 297
in Health and Weight Loss
ok, my friends. Sorry I haven't been around to offer support. I have kinda been having a pity party with my self. It started a couple of weeks ago when I realized I have been on here almost a year and I've only lost 15 pounds. I just got really depressed when I started thinking about it. I told my self, "you have been exercising, and are almost always under your calories." I started to feel really guilty and then there were a few days that I felt extremely guilty and actually went to the bathroom and made myself throw up what I had just eaten. NO LECTURES please!! I quickly realized what that was and what it could lead to, so I stopped doing that. So I really got to thinking about what I was doing and what I needed to do, and I realized "You are not being honest with your self. Sure, you work out..every now and then...Sure, you are always under your calories when you complete your entry for the day....but you don't log all those little things you snack on late at night while you watch tv...." I have been sabotaging myself, and didn't want to admit it...But you know what...I am over my pity party and I am ready to roll! I have a 5k coming up October 1st, and that is my focus. I've got 20 pounds to lose before I get back to my pre pregnancy weight, and that is also my focus. After that. I'm aiming for my pre wedding weight, and after that, a healthy BMI...I am starting over again..AGAIN!!!

Replies

  • edward1973
    edward1973 Posts: 67
    Good for you!! First step is realising yourself what's been going on. There's lots of support to be had on here. Feel free to add me if you need a kick up the bum lol x
  • Jenna1024
    Jenna1024 Posts: 13 Member
    You rock, girl!! It sounds like you know exactly what you need to do! Good luck!!
  • DRJJ2004
    DRJJ2004 Posts: 186 Member
    Good for you!! It doesn't matter how many times you fall...it's all about how many times you pick yourself back up!! You can do it!

    Hugs!
  • Cat52169
    Cat52169 Posts: 277 Member
    Welcome back!!! I totally understand how you feel. It is very frustrating when you feel you are doing everything possible to lose weight and it just isn't coming off in the time frame you've chosen for yourself. I also tried the purging route and lost about 20 pounds in a month but realized that it wasn't good for me in any way and that I would either have to do that for the rest of my life or stop. Losing weight is hard but just like anything else you just can't stop trying until you succeed! I decided to just try and eat healthier meals and exercise because it is good for me and give my weightloss time to adjust on it's own. Good for you for continuing to try! GOOD LUCK!!!! :smile:
  • jessisc
    jessisc Posts: 14
    I can definitely relate! I also lie to myself about how often I exercise and how much I actually ate, then wonder why the weight isn't falling off. Good for you! I am at the same place to. Ready to stop feeling sorry for myself and start moving! You can do it!
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
    Congrats, not only on finally making that leap from "part time" accountability to full time, but also on losing 15 pounds over the last year. I know you probably don't think it is, but losing anything, rather than gaining (when we have weight to lose, of course), is always something to celebrate. The way I see it, if you hadn't been making the part time effort, you probably would have actually gained weight, so :flowerforyou:

    You made part of the transition last year and are making the rest of it now. Congratulations and I wish you better success in the coming year.
  • Jill_newimprovedversion
    Jill_newimprovedversion Posts: 988 Member
    The worst thing about pity parties is that either no one comes, or the ones who try to "cheer you up" bring cake.

    The best friends are the ones that come alongside you and gently, lovingly urge you to get back up and move forward.


    Being completely honest with yourself is a MAJOR NSV, my dear.

    I REALLY struggled w/ making my diary open, and being honest enough w/ myself ( and a few close friends I've gathered here on MFP)
    to be willing to log EVERYTHING, even the binges.

    It's not that I have some warped sense of pleasure of airing my failures, but it gives me a clear picture of the "damage" I do to myself each time I do this...
    and the *few* times I have gone OVERBOARD and LOGGED IT, quite often I have been able to get in some exercise before bed
    OR the next day
    to help OFFSET it before it packs on some extra fat.
    Mentally, being able to see that I could UNDO some of the damage- helped me shake the mindset I ALWAYS ended up in:
    the "well, I already blew it.....might as well KEEP GOING......" and stay on the binge for several more days........

    My heart goes out to you.....I hope you have some wonderful friends who support you in this......and those who do throw stones and crucify you....DELETE them, my dear. You have that option, ya know.
  • maura1110
    maura1110 Posts: 171 Member
    Hey, I'm pretty sure that whether we want to admit it or not, 99% of us have been there and can relate. Just keep logging in to stay motivated, this is a great support system here! You WILL reach your goals. :)
  • ohmariposa
    ohmariposa Posts: 372 Member
    I really do believe that this journey shold be taken one day at a time. Try your best every day-setbacks will happen. I have only been living a healthir lifestyle since July 23rd so I haven't really experienced any setback yet, but I am sure my time will come lol
    Welcome Back :-)
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    Good for you! it's never fun or easy to face that stuff about ourselves, and not ONE of us would be here if we didn't do the same things. But you have taken that hard look at yourself and you'll find that you've come out the better for it.

    i find that it's helping me to think of my weight loss like i do recovery (oh yeah addictive personality, that's me) and i focus on TODAY. i went to the gym today and i've logged my food today. Today is all we have. Today is all you can worry about. We can't effect the past and we can't plan out the future, but we control today and that will shape the others.

    Good for you getting back on the wagon. and with the self-therapy, i think you'll only come back stronger.
  • Amandanoralynn
    Amandanoralynn Posts: 231 Member
    Good for you for getting back on track. I figure everytime I get back on track it keeps me from gaining my weight back as for some reason that comes on fast. I am waiting to get to that 15 lb loss. It has been years since I have lost weight.
    I try to keep logging even on tough days.
    You are doing great! Hang in there!

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