The dreaded 350 pound mark has been hit..

I told myself I'd never reach 300 pounds. Well, I had my first daughter and blew that out of the water. I told myself, "Eh it's ok. You're pregnant. Its excusable.. sorta." I then told myself no matter what, come help or high water I would never hit 350. Well, then I had my son and while I only gained a total of 10 pounds that whole pregnancy I still hit 350. Guys, you know when you get to that point where you're like ok.. I have zero choice now? I have to lose weight. The whole, oh I'll start monday thing is unacceptable. That you know you're just going to keep gaining over time but you still feel that sense of laziness too? I'm terrified that I've hit this mark. My body is starting to break down on me and I can feel it. My husband has even brought up that he wants to be supportive but it's hard when I've started and stopped with my weight loss so many times. It hurts, but it's also motivating. I just wanted to get this out in hope's others have felt or do feel the same way. Let me know your thoughts.
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Replies

  • AKTipsyCat
    AKTipsyCat Posts: 240 Member
    I feel you on the stopping and starting; but at least you keep starting. Good luck!
  • hateapples
    hateapples Posts: 28 Member
    Hey well done on starting
  • JasonDee1989
    JasonDee1989 Posts: 84 Member
    You just gotta dive in. While I don’t have all that much to lose, it’s all in the same. Get yourself into a regimen that’s easy to follow. Start by walking the kids around the block and working up to a little more strenuous exercise. You sound like you want it, that’s the first step. You can do this! Great support system here!
  • MoonlitEve
    MoonlitEve Posts: 19 Member
    Ah. One more thing and this is important. For the longest time I was fluctuating between 360 and 355. Then after experiencing a tremendously painful ovarian cyst where I could hardly eat because of nausea, I realized I would lose a lot of weight. In fact by the time U recovered I was 349.

    So I told myself. This is my new body. My old one has perished and now. I have a new beginning. Since then I have fluctuated between 350 and 346 but tell myself I have no desire to go back to 360. Because 360 to me, represented who I was, and not who I am.
  • Bex953172
    Bex953172 Posts: 4,064 Member
    You can do this, don't dwell on what's happened!
    And yes, pregnancy is an excuse LOL! And no one should dare say otherwise if they want to keep their life!

    But honestly, it's gonna take time, you're going to need the patience to see the results, and also, in terms of things like having rhe motivation to keep going.
    Motivation isn't something you need.
    What you need, is discipline.

    You're never going to feel like it don't wait for motivation. You're not gonna feel like eating a salad, you're not going to feel like going to the gym, you literally have to force yourself to do these things and be disciplined to achieve success. You can have it if you want it. But you have to be disciplined.
    Basically, F your feelings, atleast beforehand, think of your feelings afterwards, like you're glad you stayed in your calorie limit because you chose salad, you felt good because you worked out, you feel amazing that the scale has dropped!

    Oh and a written plan always helps me!
    On my wall in the kitchen I have written a list of my worst foods. And next to it I have written a list of low calorie alternatives so I know if I go in the kitchen looking for biscuits (because that's what I feel like) I look at my list (because it's hard to choose something else when you feel like eating biscuits) and it's basically something there telling me I can have this this or that.

    I also logged for a few days normally, no restrictions ect. To see what I was dealing with basically and I looked at my highest calorie foods and tried to find an alternative, so for example I have mayo on my salads, it's a lot of calories, but the low fat mayo is less calories so I buy that. Potatoes, no good really, portion size to keep it lower in calories is not enough so I just add more veg to fill me up or do Zoodles.


    Also with your partner, don't just say can you help me, tell him exactly what you want him to help you with, what you need help with
    Mine tries to help me avoid chocolate and if he buys stuff for himself to not offer it to me.

    Good luck!
  • happymom24
    happymom24 Posts: 26 Member
    I can relate. I have 4 kids, and with my last one, I was over 200 lbs. I got down to 170, but am back over 200. But this time, I'm not carrying another human! I'm disappointed in myself, but I'm not motivated, am stressed with work, having four kids, and it seems my DH is suffering from mild depression. I'm just exhausted from it all. I know I have to do something. I'm back on MFP to try again. I get short of breath, my knees and feet hurt. What is getting me now is the pair of shorts that were so baggy on me are now fitting well. Ugh. Having the kids home all summer means more snacks around, more ice cream trips. I try to tell them "Everything in moderation" and don't want them to see me dieting. I think I have screwed with my metabolism for too many years and my lack of exercise just kills my attempts. We have an elliptical in our bedroom but I can maybe do ten minutes. I know it will take time but I eventually get frustrated. I'm hoping for me and you that this time we find the spark to make it different.
  • Bex953172
    Bex953172 Posts: 4,064 Member
    happymom24 wrote: »
    I can relate. I have 4 kids, and with my last one, I was over 200 lbs. I got down to 170, but am back over 200. But this time, I'm not carrying another human! I'm disappointed in myself, but I'm not motivated, am stressed with work, having four kids, and it seems my DH is suffering from mild depression. I'm just exhausted from it all. I know I have to do something. I'm back on MFP to try again. I get short of breath, my knees and feet hurt. What is getting me now is the pair of shorts that were so baggy on me are now fitting well. Ugh. Having the kids home all summer means more snacks around, more ice cream trips. I try to tell them "Everything in moderation" and don't want them to see me dieting. I think I have screwed with my metabolism for too many years and my lack of exercise just kills my attempts. We have an elliptical in our bedroom but I can maybe do ten minutes. I know it will take time but I eventually get frustrated. I'm hoping for me and you that this time we find the spark to make it different.

    10 minutes isn't bad!
    It's better than nothing.
    I exercise to fitness videos on YouTube, I found one I loved that was 40 minutes long, I think I managed 15 minutes first time round, and the second time, in fact for the first week I could only do 15 minutes and my body felt battered.
    Anyway the next week I actually managed 20 minutes. And now I can do 30 minutes, with lots of pauses but still 30 minutes! I had doubled my time in 2-3 weeks just by keeping doing it!
    And as of yesterday I had less pauses, had better form and got another 5 minutes in!
    I reckon in about another 3 weeks I will be able to do it from start to finish with 0 pauses!

    Get on it, keep at it, and you'll see the progress for yourself. Even if you use it for 10 minutes today, 11 minutes tonorrow, it's still progress!
  • cnavarro002
    cnavarro002 Posts: 235 Member
    It's so hard when you want it so bad, but it's also so rewarding when you start losing. You have to find what works for you, and keep going. I went through so many exercise rituals until I found what I loved - water aerobics. It's fun, easy on my joints and I'm not sweating all over the place. I'm part of a group called 350+ pounds support for men and women (or something like that). Its a great support group of people who know how you feel and what you are going through. We do monthly challenges etc. it's a comfortable environment where you don't feel judged because we are all going through the same thing will a lot of weight to lose. Look it up under groups and feel free to friend me. I have an open diary. Good luck!
  • bblue656
    bblue656 Posts: 159 Member
    I feel you. I hit 307 and it stopped there, there was no way in hell i was getting any bigger. Im now at 204 and have 40lbs to go to be at a healthy weight. My diary is always open if you want to take a look or be friends. That goes for everyone!
  • brookielaw
    brookielaw Posts: 814 Member
    Yes. I have 100% felt the same way. My high weight was 387.2. I'm maintaining in the 160's now, 5 years later following many ups and downs, a pregnancy, multiple surgeries, cancer, and a medication that is causing weight gain. You CAN do it. It's not always going to be easy, but it will be worth it. You have kids to be there for and to be an example for. Sadly, obesity increases your risk for 14 different cancers but losing weight decreases your risk. It's worth the effort. Small changes add up! It takes 21 days to make or break a habit, but you can easily make a small change a week. I started with quitting sugar sodas, drinking more water. Simple. Then came logging everything and making better choices. Then I started moving more (not exercising, seriously, just moving more...parking farther, etc)...then exercising. It all added up. Here on MFP, the 100+ Lbs to lose community was a HUGE part of my success. They are all so wonderful and supportive. Remember your "why" during the tough times. Reward yourself (not with food) for milestones along the way. You CAN do it!

  • EliteCoachKal
    EliteCoachKal Posts: 35 Member
    Lizzie your story is all too familiar. I can tell you from experience that 99% of people that need to make a big change in any area their life experience the exact same thing. We all have a story about why it's ok and why it's not our fault and we tell ourselves that story until one day the pain of staying the same finally becomes worse than the pain of changing. That's the day we say: "That's it. I simply cannot live this way anymore. Not ONE MORE DAY." It is in those moments that our destiny is shaped. You've taken some great steps signing on here and enlisting your fellow members for their help and support. Now it's going to be some small shifts in your mindset that will get you off the roller coaster and keep you on the path to lasting change. Best of luck on your journey and let me know how I can help/support you. :)
  • elainemariebenes
    elainemariebenes Posts: 16 Member
    I topped out at 300 and enough was enough for me. For me, I had to go into autopilot robot mode and just do what needed to be done day in, day out. I couldn’t give myself time to feel anything because I knew it would lead to a backslide. Every day I woke up and told myself I was going to make it through that day.

    Also I stayed off the scale for quite some time, almost 3 months. I get too hung up on numbers so I didn’t want normal fluctuations to give me an excuse to binge, but YMMV, everyone is different with that.

    Just know many of us have been there, we understand, and I can tell you now that I’m 150 pounds less, it’s. all. worth. it.
  • EliteCoachKal
    EliteCoachKal Posts: 35 Member
    Bex953172 wrote: »
    You're never going to feel like it don't wait for motivation. You're not gonna feel like eating a salad, you're not going to feel like going to the gym, you literally have to force yourself to do these things and be disciplined to achieve success. You can have it if you want it. But you have to be disciplined.

    Lots of great advice in this post, but I have to disagree with you on this one part, Bex. We can only discipline/force ourselves to do anything for so long before it's too much. That's why so many of us have yoyo'd up and down so many times over the course of our lifetimes. But when we connect with WHY we really must change and our vision of our future becomes so crystal clear that it feels real, it ceases to be a struggle. Then, little by little the mechanics of weight loss become remarkably easy. It's the difference between pushing ourselves to do something and allowing ourselves to be pulled to it. It's a subtle difference but I've found the little changes make all the difference. <3
  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,463 Member
    Consider your family. You don’t have to live like this.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    One meal at a time, one day at a time, one pound at a time. Expect peaks and valleys.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    what a shame OP never came back!
  • natshaw19
    natshaw19 Posts: 31 Member
    I can totally relate. I am back again starting for the millionth time and trying to be disciplined and motivated, although in this heat it is so hard as I have no energy. I am spending this week tracking everything I eat, even if it is bad and also increasing my water intake and chewing each mouthful 15-20 times and putting my knife and fork down in between bites, to try and let my body register when it is full and being okay to leave things on my plate.
    It is hard, but you have to focus on your why every time you think about reaching for something that might not be the wisest choice in the end. Easy said than done I know, but it's a strategy I am trying.
    Good luck on your journey and if you want to add me, maybe we can motivate and support each other on our journey