Struggling with body image I suppose..

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sarabeebz
sarabeebz Posts: 13 Member
in Motivation and Support
Starting out on my personal fitness/nutrition journey, I wasn't overweight or close to it, just wanting to live a healthier lifestyle (mentally and physically). Over the course of the summer, I've lost about 9 pounds and have been very happy about how that looks on paper, considering as hard as I try not to care, being number conscious is ingrained in me. The issue I'm having is that I'm not happy with how my body looks. Clothes don't fit right and that was something I already struggled with being decently tall for a female and having wider hips/thighs than I guess people think a tall girl should have? I tell other people that the scale doesn't matter, what's important is how you feel in your own skin, but I don't honestly live by that. An area I'm still working on slimming is my thighs so I do treadmill/stationary bike almost every day and only do weight lifting for upper body. Of course rather than my legs slimming down significantly, my upper body is taking the hit. I'm 5'7" and hang around 132 pounds, have definition to my back and arms, and can see little abs forming under that stubborn layer of belly fat. I already suffered in the chest area but now I have literally no boobie left so I just wear a sports bra and t shirt all the time and pretend like it doesn't bother me to dress like a teenage boy all the time and joke that's it's too damn hot to wear a real bra in Florida anyway. Honestly though, I want to dress cute and show off this body that I should be proud of, but instead I feel unhappy because I can't find things that fit my new extra awkward body type. I tried upping my protein intake for a few weeks in hopes of that helping muscle growth to "fill out" more but I was so bloated and uncomfortable that I stopped and am now probably not taking in enough protein.
Idk, this is a mess of a post and I'm not really sure what I'm looking for. I know, blah blah blah just love yourself and who cares about stupid clothes or whatever, but that's not working for me. It's frustrating how much I've tried to educate myself on nutrition and tweak my diet to fulfill certain goals and maybe I did too much and now I'm too skinny? I wanted to shed some body fat and gain muscle definition but now it seems like I'm unhappier now than I was before.

Replies

  • sarabeebz
    sarabeebz Posts: 13 Member
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    livingleanlivingclean wrote: »
    Have you considered booking a session with a personal shopper or stylist to help you put together outfits? Also taking your clothes to an alteration place to be properly fitted to your shape?

    I used to hate clothes shopping when I was overweight. I still hate clothes shopping now I've lost weight - nothing fits how I like and I think most things look weird straight off the rack. I blame the clothes though, not my body.

    I hadn't considered having clothes altered. I'm really cheap and that seems like it could get expensive 😩 I had a dress altered once and it cost almost as much as I paid for the dress in the first place. Definitely something to keep in mind though! I envy girls that can run through a store and fit perfectly into everything as is and love it. I do blame clothes mostly but in the back of my mind there is the nagging thought that I've done something wrong along the way and am too skinny now. What a stupid problem to have.
  • HoneyBadger302
    HoneyBadger302 Posts: 2,000 Member
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    I will second the above. Also, if you find a store or brand that actually does fit, much better to spend extra money on a few key pieces that you'll love than a bunch of clothes you'll hate.

    Secondly, I can feel you on the image things. Even before I put on the weight, I struggled sometimes, especially since as soon as I ate or drank anything I'd have an alien belly going on. Now, with 12-25 pounds to lose, double yuck.

    I have always struggled to fit into clothes, even when thinner. Broad shoulders for a girl, not much chest, straight build - and growing up riding horses I always had thighs - it was muscle, but my waist was around a 4, but most pants were WAY to tight for my thighs. I found that horse related brands of jeans (such as Ariat) fit great (still do!) and are the most comfortable for me to wear.

    Now, I just struggle to hide the fat I'm trying to lose, because I do NOT put on weight in a "sexy" way - instead I get gigantic love "handles" and those are the last damn thing to go, too. I will trim up to almost ribs being visible before these fat rolls want to go anywhere! and they are right above the top of my pelvis, right about where my waist "should" be. Gross. But they won't leave until I trim down enough, so found an eating plan that works for me.

    Mostly to say, I feel you, and you're not alone in wanting to be able to feel pretty sometimes!
  • Millicent3015
    Millicent3015 Posts: 374 Member
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    sarabeebz wrote: »
    Starting out on my personal fitness/nutrition journey, I wasn't overweight or close to it, just wanting to live a healthier lifestyle (mentally and physically). Over the course of the summer, I've lost about 9 pounds and have been very happy about how that looks on paper, considering as hard as I try not to care, being number conscious is ingrained in me. The issue I'm having is that I'm not happy with how my body looks. Clothes don't fit right and that was something I already struggled with being decently tall for a female and having wider hips/thighs than I guess people think a tall girl should have? I tell other people that the scale doesn't matter, what's important is how you feel in your own skin, but I don't honestly live by that. An area I'm still working on slimming is my thighs so I do treadmill/stationary bike almost every day and only do weight lifting for upper body. Of course rather than my legs slimming down significantly, my upper body is taking the hit. I'm 5'7" and hang around 132 pounds, have definition to my back and arms, and can see little abs forming under that stubborn layer of belly fat. I already suffered in the chest area but now I have literally no boobie left so I just wear a sports bra and t shirt all the time and pretend like it doesn't bother me to dress like a teenage boy all the time and joke that's it's too damn hot to wear a real bra in Florida anyway. Honestly though, I want to dress cute and show off this body that I should be proud of, but instead I feel unhappy because I can't find things that fit my new extra awkward body type. I tried upping my protein intake for a few weeks in hopes of that helping muscle growth to "fill out" more but I was so bloated and uncomfortable that I stopped and am now probably not taking in enough protein.
    Idk, this is a mess of a post and I'm not really sure what I'm looking for. I know, blah blah blah just love yourself and who cares about stupid clothes or whatever, but that's not working for me. It's frustrating how much I've tried to educate myself on nutrition and tweak my diet to fulfill certain goals and maybe I did too much and now I'm too skinny? I wanted to shed some body fat and gain muscle definition but now it seems like I'm unhappier now than I was before.

    I think you need to stop pretending that you're ok, as you're obviously not. If it matters to you, then of course it matters. Could you work with a personal trainer who can advise you what exercises to do so you can tone your thighs, put on some muscle and fill up in the breast area? They might be able to advise you about protein intake and overall diet, too. As for clothing, they're mass made for certain body types that a lot of women simply don't conform to because we don't have 'perfect' (clothing industry) hourglass figures or height or even show size. I'm short and fat, and I never fit any 'petite' ranges because they're made for women with the bodies of 13 year old girls. Even if I was skinny They still wouldn't fit because my arms and legs are too long and my chest is too big for petite sizes. I'd suggest finding clothing lines that cater for women with your body shape, buy a few pieces you'll wear frequently, and get other pieces adjusted-- it will cost money but it's worth it. Or you can find a dressmaker who charges reasonable prices. If you are open to it, talk to a therapist about your body issues, because I can tell this is upsetting you and impacting your quality of life, and maybe you need a bit of help to sort out conflicting feelings about yourself.

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