help...I cant motivate myself!

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Ive tried...I have horrible photos to remind me how unhappy I am with my weight, I have a wedding dress to get into (not a traditional one) and I just cannot get motivated to exercise and eat well. The ice cream holds me hostage, snack bars jump into my mouth uninvited and I literally dream about eating all the time. HEELLLPPPPPPPP!!!!!

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  • Idontcareyoupick
    Idontcareyoupick Posts: 2,854 Member
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    Can't motivate you to do anything, that needs to come from you. Maybe you can start with one thing, such as eating either ice cream or a snack bar or pick one thing to start doing such as logging. Feel free to add me if you want, but you'll have to do something or find a better reason to start if you really want to
  • bradandrus76
    bradandrus76 Posts: 6 Member
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    Maybe you need to lose the photos of who you were and start believing in who you can be. Stop beating yourself up for where you are and have been. Focus on where you want to go. When it comes to the ice cream and treats don't absolutely deny yourself but cut back on the amounts reminding yourself of your goals. This is what is working for me. My office job has me surrounded by food my officemates share. It's a mine field but I remind myself of where I want to be. That being said my self control fails sometimes and I just have to remind myself one failure does not mean complete failure. When you stumble just smile and tell yourself you'll do better next time and you willl.You can do this! Stay positive.
  • sarah_ed
    sarah_ed Posts: 3 Member
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    Remember that any progress, even a small accomplishment is still progress. Go into this with a positive attitude and believe you can make it happen.
    I don’t keep junk food in the house so my mind doesn’t wander to it. My boyfriend used to bring me home candy or treats almost every night so I had to have a serious conversation with him about being supportive. Now every time he goes to the store he brings me a bottle of water, simply because he feels the need to bring something back for me. Having a close support is very helpful.
  • Seffell
    Seffell Posts: 2,222 Member
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    I agree you need to take responsibility. You are an adult person. Bars don't jump into your mouth. You choose to eat them.
    The sooner you realise you have the control the sooner things will start working for you.
  • Dr_Farru
    Dr_Farru Posts: 63 Member
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    planetmog wrote: »
    Ive tried...I have horrible photos to remind me how unhappy I am with my weight, I have a wedding dress to get into (not a traditional one) and I just cannot get motivated to exercise and eat well. The ice cream holds me hostage, snack bars jump into my mouth uninvited and I literally dream about eating all the time. HEELLLPPPPPPPP!!!!!

    I feel like a lot of the above messages are kind of harsh.. People can motivate each other. And i understand that you were romanticizing by saying that snack bars jump in your mouth, I'm not sure why that was taken so literally.
    I've been struggling too. In my mind I'm still the sexy thang I was just a few years ago... I'm over 50lbs up.. And whenever I am stressed all I crave is chocolate and I can totally understand what addicts feel like because I'm dying to have it.
    Around 3pm at work, I'll have chocolate cravings. I just had to stop and right this moment I'm as stressed as can be but somehow I am not having the craving.
    I know what you mean that even though you know you need to fit in that dress and you don't like the way you look you still can't motivate yourself..
    I just had a big birthday party for myself and I look like the red queen from Wonderland in the pictures instead of a hula girl per carribean theme.
    I'm throwing a Halloween party next and plan to be a fairy... I just don't want to look like Cinderella's fairy god mother instead of a fairy and at that point it hit me.. My life is not going to ease up, I'm always going to be busy, always going to be stressed.. Question is am I willing to invest in myself to make a change?
    I'm still struggling to go ride my bike right this minute.. Last night I went out dancing with friends just so I could get some exercise and it be fun!
    It helps to have mfp friends that push you... I did it before with the help of mfp friends thats the only way Mfp worked for me. Add positive people that will share tips.. That post about their struggles and their workouts.. Watching how much others are working out pushed me to go previously.
    The last but not least thing is... Are you depressed? Because that could be a reason that's keeping you from getting up and going and instead just eating.... Also is your fiance happy with the way you look so he keeps telling you you're fine the way you are? You Need to tell him to stop saying that and go work out with you!
  • Dr_Farru
    Dr_Farru Posts: 63 Member
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    Since in my mind I'm still 50+lbs lighter when I see my pictures I can't recognize myself.
  • Dr_Farru
    Dr_Farru Posts: 63 Member
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    88olds wrote: »
    Good news. You really don’t need motivation beyond the first step. But you do need determination.

    As a first step, why don’t you quit exaggerating? I believe you when you say you dream about food. So what? I dream about stuff that is completely goofy. Dreams don’t render us helpless.

    If you’re saying you can’t control yourself with ice cream in the house, get rid of it. Run water on it and it will melt and be go in a minute. The snack bars can go it the trash.

    Weight loss is a set of things to do. Do you want to pursue weight loss or do you just wish you weighed less? Start by exercising some control over your environment. Try to set yourself up to succeed, not fail. You can.

    True story.. I threw away all the sweets and tish from my birthday 🎂 in the garbage today.
  • Dr_Farru
    Dr_Farru Posts: 63 Member
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    planetmog wrote: »
    Ive tried...I have horrible photos to remind me how unhappy I am with my weight, I have a wedding dress to get into (not a traditional one) and I just cannot get motivated to exercise and eat well. The ice cream holds me hostage, snack bars jump into my mouth uninvited and I literally dream about eating all the time. HEELLLPPPPPPPP!!!!!

    Another thing that helped me in the past was I would not come home from work unless I had gone to the gym first... That was how I forced myself to go. Whether it was just relaxation Yoga.. I went and did something
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    edited August 2018
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    Wanting to be an ideal size to fit in to a dress is different from wanting to make different choices from the pantry.

    You need to acknowledge the connection. Is depriving yourself for a few months worth it?

    If the answer is yes, find ways to treat yourself that doesn’t include high calorie foods.

    I think a simple solution would be to resolve to weigh and log everything EVERYTHING that goes in your mouth.

    If the answer is NO, then get a different dress you will be comfortable in.