Smile For A Day **JOKE

MisszObrien
MisszObrien Posts: 31
edited October 1 in Chit-Chat
A fellow was ordered to lose 75 pounds, due to VERY serious health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a guaranteed weight loss program. "Guaranteed my *kitten*", he thought to himself, but desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3 day 10 pound weight loss program.

The next day there is a knock at his door and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptous, athletic, beautiful babe dressed in nothing but a pair of running shoes and a sign around her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

The sign reads, "If you can catch me you can have me!"

Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.

After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way this company does business."

The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens. On the fourth day he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost ten pounds, as promised.

So, he calls the company and orders from them their 5 day/ 20 pound program. As expected, the next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunningly beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

He's after her in a shot. This girl is in great shape and it takes a while to catch her, but when he does, it's worth every cramp and wheeze. She is by far the best he's ever had. For the next four days, the same routine happens and much to his delight on the fifth day, he weighs himself and found he has lost another twenty pounds as promised!

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7 day/50 pound loss program. "Are you sure," asks the representative on the phone, "this is our most rigorous program..." "Absolutely," he replies. "I haven't felt this great in years!"

The next day there is a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds A big sized muscular man standing there wearing nothing but pink racing spikes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, I will have you!"
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :happy: :happy: :drinker:

Replies

  • bjenny12345
    bjenny12345 Posts: 118 Member
    :laugh: That was funny!
  • soknurdy
    soknurdy Posts: 74 Member
    OMG that's hilarious.
  • val_140
    val_140 Posts: 75
    LMBO!!! Too funny!! I bet he shedded some lbs!:laugh:
  • I thought It Was Hillarious & It Got Me Thinking If Its That Easy I Wanna Be A MAN ;)
  • Crooks0204
    Crooks0204 Posts: 189
    :bigsmile: very funny!!!
  • shalynna89
    shalynna89 Posts: 324 Member
    Lmao!! I needed a laugh thanks for sharing!!
  • AmberLiscous
    AmberLiscous Posts: 644 Member
    LMAO :laugh:
  • SamiSamiBoBlammy
    SamiSamiBoBlammy Posts: 868 Member
    :laugh:
  • jriv113
    jriv113 Posts: 20
    LLOOOLLL!! THATS TOO FUNNY!
  • Jade_Butterfly
    Jade_Butterfly Posts: 2,963 Member
    A fellow was ordered to lose 75 pounds, due to VERY serious health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across an ad in the newspaper for a guaranteed weight loss program. "Guaranteed my *kitten*", he thought to himself, but desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3 day 10 pound weight loss program.

    The next day there is a knock at his door and when he answers, there stands before him a voluptous, athletic, beautiful babe dressed in nothing but a pair of running shoes and a sign around her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

    The sign reads, "If you can catch me you can have me!"

    Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.

    After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the way this company does business."

    The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing happens. On the fourth day he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost ten pounds, as promised.

    So, he calls the company and orders from them their 5 day/ 20 pound program. As expected, the next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunningly beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

    He's after her in a shot. This girl is in great shape and it takes a while to catch her, but when he does, it's worth every cramp and wheeze. She is by far the best he's ever had. For the next four days, the same routine happens and much to his delight on the fifth day, he weighs himself and found he has lost another twenty pounds as promised!

    He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7 day/50 pound loss program. "Are you sure," asks the representative on the phone, "this is our most rigorous program..." "Absolutely," he replies. "I haven't felt this great in years!"

    The next day there is a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds A big sized muscular man standing there wearing nothing but pink racing spikes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If I catch you, I will have you!"
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :happy: :happy: :drinker:

    So funny! Good one!
  • Glad You Guys Enjoyed It !!
  • dracobaby82
    dracobaby82 Posts: 380 Member
    LOL that's great! haha
  • I've seen an animated version of that. On newgrounds. Lol.
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