Gym anxiety
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r0ck3rgirl
Posts: 67 Member
I know I shouldn't care but I'm embarrassed at the gym. I'm big and I have mobility issues and I feel like people are thinking I don't belong there. That they're laughing at the fat girl who can barely walk trying to work out. I need the equipment. Not just for weightloss but because I need the strength training to help me improve mobility. Even when I make myself go despite the anxiety I don't work out as hard as I probably could because I feel like people are kidding me for struggling. Can anyone else relate?
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I have high social anxiety in venturing anywhere alone. I have a gym at work and it's a struggle to go even when it's only my coworkers, because I'm afraid I'm getting judged or side-eyed or whatever. Last week, I went all by myself (my usual work buddy was in a week long event) for three WHOLE times. I felt pretty accomplished and good!
It wasn't easy, but each day was a little easi/er/ when I blocked out the people from my thoughts. I immerse myself in audiobooks and have a little program I use so that I don't have to think and don't have time to ask myself "what next". Instead, I go from one thing to the next thing to the next thing.
You can do it! No one is judging you -- or if they ARE, they are randos who mean nothing and aren't worth the energy it'd take to think about it. Map out a script for every day you go to the gym so you can go in, knock out your script, and be ready to go.
Eventually, you'll be confident and comfortable that you won't need the 'get-in and get-out' script (as I like to think of it).
Good luck to you!7 -
What I have learned is people at the gym are way to self absorbed to be looking/interested in what you are doing! They will be much more focused on themselves.
Just remember everyone is just there trying to be a better version of themselves no matter what that looks like
Good Luck!16 -
r0ck3rgirl wrote: »I know I shouldn't care but I'm embarrassed at the gym. I'm big and I have mobility issues and I feel like people are thinking I don't belong there. That they're laughing at the fat girl who can barely walk trying to work out. I need the equipment. Not just for weightloss but because I need the strength training to help me improve mobility. Even when I make myself go despite the anxiety I don't work out as hard as I probably could because I feel like people are kidding me for struggling. Can anyone else relate?
Go to a Planet Fitness. They cater to people afraid of going to the gym, or are self conscious about other people who are fitter than they are.
There are fat people that go to the gym I go to. I think "good for them." You are at the gym. What else is anyone expecting of you?
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It doesn't help that I use a Walker to get from machine to machine right now and people stare. I assume because I look too young for a walker.7
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I was having the same issue, but I have finally realized that nobody that matters to me will judge me.
I do not care what someone that I don't know thinks of me.
I will be joining the gym and I will do my thing.
I am fat and out of shape, but I am trying and that puts me way ahead of the people sitting on their couch eating Doritos.
It might help if you can find a gym buddy.
If no buddy then just go and do your thing and ignore everyone else.
When I see a big person working out or walking I admire their determination.
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I've been in and out of gyms for a good chunk of my life...in my experience, while there are certainly fit people there, the vast majority of patrons are trying to get fit and are overweight and trying to lose weight.
At any rate, when I'm at the gym I am there to get my work in...I'm not people watching.4 -
r0ck3rgirl wrote: »It doesn't help that I use a Walker to get from machine to machine right now and people stare. I assume because I look too young for a walker.
Doubt they're staring, just noticing you. Frankly, they're probably impressed that you're working out while in need of a walker. I would be thinking "now there's dedication."11 -
r0ck3rgirl wrote: »It doesn't help that I use a Walker to get from machine to machine right now and people stare. I assume because I look too young for a walker.
That's true and to be expected. People are curious. You'll find that when the novelty wears off, you'll be just one of the crowd.1 -
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r0ck3rgirl wrote: »It doesn't help that I use a Walker to get from machine to machine right now and people stare. I assume because I look too young for a walker.
Doubt they're staring, just noticing you. Frankly, they're probably impressed that you're working out while in need of a walker. I would be thinking "now there's dedication."
This is what I would be thinking too! People will be inspired by you.2 -
Nikki_Lee12 wrote: »What I have learned is people at the gym are way to self absorbed to be looking/interested in what you are doing! They will be much more focused on themselves.
Just remember everyone is just there trying to be a better version of themselves no matter what that looks like
Good Luck!
Perfectly said!1 -
I'll go take a look around planet fitness. I think my physical therapist said they have a pool too which would be super helpful after it's too cold to get in our pool0
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Hey girl, dont worry about going, just go. When Im at the gym and this is everyone I suspect, I have my earbuds in and music blaring. I only find myself looking around when Im doing cardio and am bored out my mind. Not to just look ....because everyone there is there to get in shape.0
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Nobody cares. Everyone has their ears covered with their Bose noise reduction headphones looking at themselves in the mirror. Go to the gym. Put your work in. Go home. Don't worry about them.3
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Encourage you to keep at it and do not let others influence what is best for you.
The only way to improve is to go and continue to be active. So you have to ask yourself what is more important caring what strangers think about you - or your overall health and well being? Choice is always your health.
Every time I get out of the car to walk in I remind myself that I am not there to impress anyone, I am there for myself and my family. I understand your concerns but you are just as entitled as anyone else to use the gym as a paying customer. It takes a while to make the attitude change but you can do it.
Go with a friend or get a trainer that can help with accountability and making the visits become routine - its always nice to work out with someone else. More power to you for going - keep up the good work.
You could also just hang this sign on your walker when you go to the gym.
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r0ck3rgirl wrote: »It doesn't help that I use a Walker to get from machine to machine right now and people stare. I assume because I look too young for a walker.
Doubt they're staring, just noticing you. Frankly, they're probably impressed that you're working out while in need of a walker. I would be thinking "now there's dedication."
This! ^quiksylver296 wrote: »
And This!! ^^
At my old gym there were two members that blew me away everyday. An elderly man and woman (not-related). They were there rain or shine. The lady used a walker and would slowly make her way across the gym to the pool every day. The gentleman had a huge smile on his face and a kind word for everyone and walked with a pronounced limp/foot dragging. He still hit the weights hard each day. If people are looking at you, it's because they are inspired by you.2 -
I promise no fit person is thinking that. They're more excited that you're there!0
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I had similar anxieties when I joined a gym. To combat these fears, I started working out first thing in the AM when there are less people at the gym (in addition, there's little competition for the equipment.) I think the biggest thing I had to get over were my own insecurities; if anything, people were extraordinarily nice and supportive when I was at my least fit. I'm still not where I want to be, but I've made some real progress.
Personally, the people I notice at the gym are the ones who are there on a daily (or near-daily) basis. As others have said, people notice hard work and dedication rather your fitness level. Everyone is on a different point on the fitness spectrum at the gym, the one thing they all have in common is that they are in the process of improving themselves.
Good luck!1 -
Ditto what everyone said already. People will look at you when you use a walker, but they aren't judging you. If anything they are probably impressed that you have that much dedication. There was a guy at my gym in a wheel chair. He didn't let that stop him. There are all kinds of people at the gym. Fit people, old, young, out of shape, people with physical disabilities, etc. It's not reserved for just already-fit people.3
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I say ditto to what everyone else has said as well. Go and do your best. Make good things happen for yourself.
I was, and still am, basically, the biggest guy at the gym when I’m there and it’s not because of muscle. However, I have made it a habit to go and try to be better every day. Building the habit, IMO, is going to overcome almost anything, anxiety, motivation, “I don’t feel good”, you name it.
I started at 400 lbs and I’m down to almost 300 now. I thought EVERY eye was one me. It was scary. I learned, and you can to, to embrace the suck lol.
I have all the faith in the world that you can overcome your anxiety and work toward a better future. I applaud you for stepping outside of your comfort zone! More people need to do that! You’re amazing and deserve a long future ahead of you!2
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