Working out/ eating healthy with a spouse who doesn’t
lpw612
Posts: 8 Member
I live in a small apartment with my husband and I want to start doing beach body work outs when I get home from work @5. However, I feel bad kicking him out of the living room and making him go in the bedroom for an hour. I also want to cook healthier but my boyfriend is a picky eater. How do I meet my fitness and food goals when I have to “tip toe” around him?
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Replies
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take up running, then no one is in anyone's way.
i'm sure your partner wouldn't mind for an hour, i used to do that to my husband before we had a bigger house with an actual gym room. i don't think 1 hour 2-3 times a week is unreasonable.
if you're the cook then you may have to do 2 meals if he is that picky and doesn't eat stuff you deem 'healthy'4 -
Just cook what you want--if someone who is older than 12 doesn't like it then they can fix something for themselves--and if the person is 12 or younger be a grownup and tell them to eat their dinner. I never understand what is meant by "cooking healthier" Do people always just cook hot dogs and never have a vegetable or salad with their meal?19
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I live in a small apartment with my husband and I want to start doing beach body work outs when I get home from work @5. However, I feel bad kicking him out of the living room and making him go in the bedroom for an hour. I also want to cook healthier but my boyfriend is a picky eater. How do I meet my fitness and food goals when I have to “tip toe” around him?
Having both a husband and a boyfriend is your first problem ! : )51 -
First, ask your significant other to cook while you work out. If he's just sitting around anyway and he is picky then him cooking for the two of you sounds like the perfect thing for him to do. Decide on your menu ahead of time so you aren't sabotaged by high calorie food.
If that's not an option then meal plan weekly and run it by him before grocery shopping. Make sure he is going to eat or at least try everything you cook and go from there. Some things can be substituted without the picky eater even noticing, like low fat sour cream, olive oil mayo, fat free milk, etc.4 -
mountainmare wrote: »Just cook what you want--if someone who is older than 12 doesn't like it then they can fix something for themselves--and if the person is 12 or younger be a grownup and tell them to eat their dinner. I never understand what is meant by "cooking healthier" Do people always just cook hot dogs and never have a vegetable or salad with their meal?
^ This
Tell him this is the food you're going to cook, and offer to cook for two. If he doesn't want it, cook for one and tell him to prepare his own food.
That's how it works in my house - granted its with friends who are roomates, not a SO, but the point still stands...before I started tracking we used to do meals together, take turns ordering or buying ingredients and cooking etc. Once I went to eating "cleaner" and I went off on my own and now I take care of my own food and the other 2 do their thing together most of the time. I still offer to make food once in awhile but it usually gets turned down and they just make what they want, I make what I want, I hit my macro and cal goals, everyone's happy.
EDIT: oh, and mountainmare on your hot dog question, yeah that's pretty much the case in my house. My salmon, steak and eggs, salads, fresh wild trout, brown rice and ground beef, steamed veggies etc. get turned down in favor of something deep fried, from a box, takeout, or grilled dogs and burgers with fries 95% of the time. I dont mind - at least I don't have to worry about food disappearing.4 -
Well, um, husband or boyfriend? OK, moving on. Have whoever work out with you. If he is not ready to do so, have him start dinner while you exercise, whether it is Tae Bo, running, walking, whatever.
My husband does not run with me, nor does he exercise with me using videos. He DOES walk with me, which is pretty cool. He has jumped onto the healthy, low calorie food bandwagon (tho he does eat ice cream after I go to bed).
Oh, and he comes out and walks while I run and cheers me on!
Good luck!
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None of my business, but what does your husband think of your boyfriend?
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For the exercise, ask him to find something else to do for an hour while you work out. Surely he can give you some space if he understands it's important to you.
For cooking, you can adjust to fit both of your needs. My husband can't cook, needs to gain weight and can be picky. So if I'm doing a protein, starch and vegetable I just make sure the vegetable is one he'll eat (he'll eat most proteins and starches) and add butter, cheese, sauces, etc. to his. He gets more starch, I eat more vegetables. If I want a stir-fry, it's really no big deal to throw a chicken breast in the oven or on the grill for him and heat up leftover rice or instant mashed potatoes.
If your husband can cook, split up the duties and just eat less when he cooks and add more vegetables. Getting him to at least try some of what you are having is good and if you can divide up the cooking he may be more receptive to trying new things since you are also trying the things he likes.
It's worth a shot anyway. Of course, you could always tell him to just cook what he wants and you'll do the same.0 -
Men would never toil over their weight loss plan like this. They wouldn't put their goals on hold because they worry about what their girlfriend or wife thinks. They just do it for themselves because it is the right thing to do. You sound as if you almost won't do it because you are more worried about what he will think.
empower yourself.. take control of your health.. if this person loves you they'll support you.11 -
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Someone above said: "if your husband cant cook". I hope they meant "ca'nt cook because both his arms were amputated in an industrial accident"
Zero excuse for anyone to not cook and clean for themselves. Absolutely zero.14 -
Someone above said: "if your husband cant cook". I hope they meant "ca'nt cook because both his arms were amputated in an industrial accident"
Zero excuse for anyone to not cook and clean for themselves. Absolutely zero.
Well aren't you *sweet*.
Sometimes people mean exactly what they say. Sometimes "can't" actually means "can't".
That said, yes, every able bodied person should know how to cook, etc.2 -
elisa123gal wrote: »Men would never toil over their weight loss plan like this. They wouldn't put their goals on hold because they worry about what their girlfriend or wife thinks. They just do it for themselves because it is the right thing to do. You sound as if you almost won't do it because you are more worried about what he will think.
empower yourself.. take control of your health.. if this person loves you they'll support you.
I concern myself with how my dietary and exercise plans affect my wife and children. I don't take over our living room for an hour every day so I can exercise, and I don't make special demands on our family dinners so that I can only eat what I want.
I made my goals, and developed strategies around my family and lifestyle so that I could achieve these goals without negatively impacting my family.
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my husband was a bit of a food snob and he liked to eat. so we worked on a menu that worked for both of us. i just ate a less and filled up more on vegetables.
i would get up early and put the tv on very quiet so i could work out without waking him up. also, ran without him. on the occasion he chose to workout, he was a gym rat. i'm not. to each their own1 -
My husband is a total food snob. It's interesting being that I do all the cooking! LOL I have to work around his "issues" but it's fine. I try to fill up on lots of vegetables at our meals but other than that I just make the same normal meals we usually eat.
As for beachbody workouts, I'm sure you can ask him nicely if you can use the living room TV for an hour to do your workouts... do you have another TV in the bedroom that he can use? If not he can always keep you company. You can also take up running or get a gym membership, you won't be in each others way then.0 -
What does eat healthier mean? In what way is he picky? What do you normally cook?
Exercise wise, maybe take up running or go to the gym0 -
I am in a very traditional marriage of 31 years, I do all of the cooking by choice. My husband knows how and would do it, but I am the picky eater and I don't like how he cooks. 95% of the time he will eat what I make, but I know he would prefer burgers and pizza over chicken and salad. I have taken his feelings into consideration I make homemade burgers with extra lean beef, I just have salads with it instead of fries. Instead of ordering pizza in, I make homemade usually using pita or tortilla shells for the crust for mine. I make more vegetables for myself than potatoes, rice or pasta. I will order him a pizza and make myself something different. I don't find it all that difficult and I am the one that wants to change. It's not that he couldn't stand to lose too, but that's a decision for him to make not for me to enforce. As for exercise, we only have one tv and a very small home. I either work out when he is on the computer or after he has gone to bed. 90% of the time I go for walks or to the rec centre to swim though. I also set up a small area in another room I can use with my tablet to not disturb him.
If you want it to work you will make it work in my opinion.8 -
So if you are working out in the living room...why doesn't your husband/bf spend that hour in the kitchen making himself dinner?
If he doesn't know how to cook, I'm sure he could find some youtube videos. I doubt he'll starve if you don't fix him dinner every night.2 -
mountainmare wrote: »Just cook what you want--if someone who is older than 12 doesn't like it then they can fix something for themselves--and if the person is 12 or younger be a grownup and tell them to eat their dinner. I never understand what is meant by "cooking healthier" Do people always just cook hot dogs and never have a vegetable or salad with their meal?
I agree, I never understand what people mean when they say they want to "cook healthier" like what are you cooking that is so unhealthy that you need to completely change your meals? Maybe just eat a vegetable... that doesn't require much effort.4 -
Maybe have the husband cook for the picky boyfriend so you can do your workouts in the living room in peace?9
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I have 3 kids who obviously aren't on a diet, and a fiance that isn't. It works just fine. Sometimes he'll eat chicken and rice with me, sometimes he takes his happy butt to taco bell and leaves me alone. Also I cook whatever for my kids because they're my kids and I don't want my house burnt to the ground.1
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I wish my husband could get on board with me.. it'd be a great motivation for both of us.. but he is so hung up on fast food.. and quick meals.. it makes shopping at the store on a budget hard.0
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Eventually my husband is going to see how bad his weight gain is getting. At the start of the year, his 6 pack showed through without him flexing. Now he has a protruding belly and can't even see his abs when he flexes. I've lost 65lbs, I told him no know what I'm doing but he is so picky and doesn't want "healthy food and I'm not cooking a separate meal for him so he gets pizza and instant noodles0
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