Addiction causing foods and cheat days
R4U1R0DR1GU3Z
Posts: 81 Member
I've lost over 70 pounds in a little over a year. I always have these massive cheat days on Sundays and so far it's worked out, until recently, I wanna stop!! My Sunday cheat days is all I look forward to and can't imagine life without them (that kind of thinking is found in drug addicts). Eliminating processed food takes care of the biological side of cravings but the mental cravings are what's killing me. All my life food has been the goal, the reward, the prize!!! As counterintuitive as it sounds, the more progress I make the more I feel entitled to junk food!!! I can't seem to rewire my brain, nothing else is as enjoyable as sugar and fat. This is not even a question, but I feel desperate so I wrote this post.
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Replies
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Why have cheat days? Why not just enjoy treats in moderation? You might find it reduces the cravings when you know that you can totally have some of what you like within your calories.7
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That's the thing, if I eat a bit I'll crave even more, and more and more. It's not normal or sensible behavior. It's the sort of behavior found in drug addicts. Hoping some of you have had similar experiences. Im kind of happy, and hopeful, that I can recognize it and excited that I'll overcome it5
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@R4U1R0DR1GU3Z I know the feeling. When I cut out processed foods in 2014 in a few weeks my physical cravings started to fade quickly but I can still remember the awesome taste of Mom's Lemon Icebox pie from decades ago. Those types of mental cravings started losing their power over me after about six months to a year. I had to just stick with my no food containing added sugar and or any form of any grain rule. I still have the mental memory but they have lost their power to cause me to act in a way not in my best interest health wise.
I found the ALL or NOTHING thing to be totally real in my case so I do not tempt fate anymore.
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I have the same problem. If I have a cookie with my lunch, it will start me off that after eating that delicious cookie it will make me want to eat junk all day. If I stay away from the junk, I don’t look for it unless it’s put in front of me. I told my Doctor about this. I asked him is this all in my mind. He said no sugar is addictive. The more you eat the more you want. The longer you stay away from sugar, the cravings will lessen and lessen. Maybe I am just sensitive to sugar because some people can eat that cookie, enjoy it, and not look for anymore. With me, one will lead to another and before I know it the bag is almost empty.10
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@GaleHawkins This is EXACTLY what I'm talking about!!! You totally get it. Thanks, now I know cravings will lose intensity. How did you handle friends and family trying to force you to eat? Or the mandatory food that goes with most gatherings and celebrations?5
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@AimJolie, totally!!! I've experienced exactly that!!!4
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@R4U1R0DR1GU3Z basically I just avoid the pot luck dinners when they are really optional or at least eat before I go (learned that the hard way). After 4 years of Keto I pretty much can find all of the calories that I want that are relative low on carbs. If one is just doing low carb (<150 grams daily) it should not be much of an issue.
As a 67 year old guy the family does not mess with me. Seriously family knows 5 years ago I needed help just getting in and out of cars because of all of the pain associated with moving my joints plus most of my muscles had atrophied away over the years. My daughter who is 21 will get in my face if I even look at carbs knowing how they almost took me out.
Yes I know most people do fine with controlling the use of sugar but I do not. Even to this day I can eat 3 pounds of fresh black cherries in one setting. 5 years ago if I started on a new chocolate cake it would be gone before I would go to bed that day.
The freedom from sugar cravings is so awesome and makes life worth the living now.
It sounds like you are on track. While I never drank alcohol (it took out or greatly damaged all of my dad's brother so I knew my nature) I know friends that will no longer touch it because they know when they did they might not sober up for days or weeks. There are some things/people in life that we just can not give them an inch or they will own us.
Best of continued success.9 -
R4U1R0DR1GU3Z wrote: »@GaleHawkins This is EXACTLY what I'm talking about!!! You totally get it. Thanks, now I know cravings will lose intensity. How did you handle friends and family trying to force you to eat? Or the mandatory food that goes with most gatherings and celebrations?
I just said, "No thanks." No one should have that kind of control over what you put in your mouth.11 -
Some people are abstainers, not moderators, and that's okay. But it also means you can't have cheat days if you're an abstainer, because you can't moderate. Maybe the cheat days are making it worse because you're anticipating the food.12
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R4U1R0DR1GU3Z wrote: »My Sunday cheat days is all I look forward to and can't imagine life without them
Then stop giving yourself permission to have a cheat day and find something else highly pleasurable to do instead on a Sunday. If that means being an abstainer rather than a moderator then so be it.
It sounds like you are using hyper-palatable food as an anesthetic to dull the pain of a life which doesn't fully inspire you or to hide away from emotions you don't wish to deal with. It's probably better to deal with those issues directly rather than mask them with food.
The only person who has control over your thoughts and actions is you.
I share your struggle but it can and does get better once you accept full responsibility for the situation and understand deeply you do have the power to change it.9 -
Literally just wrote a post about this exact thing. I spoke to what @RelCanonical said as well, and I'm definitely an abstainer, not a moderator! One cookie and I will start spiraling FAST.5
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It has taken me 3 years to get to a place where sugar doesn't set me off. Usually I avoid it because it's not good for me. I was diabetic before losing weight and I don't want to go back there. Now I can eat a small amount but I know that the cravings can easily come back so I log everything even in maintenance and I stay away for the most part. I had one fun sized snickers last night and it was the first time I was able to do that without wanting a whole bag of them. One of my biggest strategies though has been to eat more healthy food like lean protein and veggies. I always allow myself a small amount of starch at each meal but I have found if my macros lean too heavily on carbs I'm craving again. Whenever my veggies get lost and I start eating more potato or rice I start overeating. So I guess I'm saying a balanced diet has been a huge help and walking daily to reduce stress.5
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I can truly relate to your post. Sugar was everything to me at one point in my life. Trying to have sugar in moderation is a tease. Having sweets in moderation is key, but dot over do it. Congratulations on your weight loss. #dontstopdontquit2
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I wanted to add, there's a difference between not being able to moderate, and feeling powerless to control yourself. If you cannot moderate, you need to end the cheat days, they are just putting you in a vicious cycle. If you are truly powerless to control yourself when certain foods are available, especially if those foods are unavoidable in certain situations, you may want to consider therapy, as there is often an underlying issue.
I would challenge you though to perhaps readjust your thinking, and try telling yourself it's just food and you are in control and you can have a little without bingeing. I think sometimes people give specific foods and their cravings for them so much power and basically create a self-fulfilling prophesy. They convince themselves they have some kind of addiction or disorder, when really they have just created a habit and a psychological need. I'm not saying this is you, just putting it out there as something to think about! I found once I focused on eating a varied, balanced diet and planning treats into my day, they lost the power. I didn't have to eat all of it, because I had already given myself permission to have some today, tomorrow, and the day after, with no guilt.
And I mean this sincerely, if you believe you are behaving in the way drug addicts behave, there is no shame or harm in talking to someone about it.
Congrats on your success, and hang in there!11 -
I abstain from foods that I have found to trigger overeating; for me its sugar, deserts, bread, or if I eat a lot of fruit, rice or potatoes. I keep carbohydrates in my diet, in the form of veg, nuts, dairy, rice and potatoes, but attne same time I watch how I feel closely, pre-logging foods for the day is also a key to any success I have had.
Once in a while, like maybe twice a year I eat a pastry or a desert, it has to be worth it, so I make sure it's delecious.
One normal isolated serving rarely gives me the old unstoppable tiger stampede, I think that is because I have worked on the problem of overeating every day for a long time.
I found the cravings I had after quiting eating trigger foods every day like I used to do were gone after two weeks or less.
Finding new ways to eat and avoid pitfalls is an ongoing adventure. Some things I have to watch out for are: holidays built around food, traveling, well meaning people who bring over dessert foods. Being asked out for dinner or meetings over restaurant meals.
Internal problems I have had are excuses I tell myself about how I deserve the treats, or that life is too hard without them, or some nonsense about how this is the last time I am liable to see a piece of cheesecake ever again. Stuff like that will come to mind sometimes, those are tips to me that I am on dangerous ground.
I continue to pre log my food for the day in maintenance.
Walking has been very helpful also.
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I wanted to add, there's a difference between not being able to moderate, and feeling powerless to control yourself. If you cannot moderate, you need to end the cheat days, they are just putting you in a vicious cycle. If you are truly powerless to control yourself when certain foods are available, especially if those foods are unavoidable in certain situations, you may want to consider therapy, as there is often an underlying issue.
I would challenge you though to perhaps readjust your thinking, and try telling yourself it's just food and you are in control and you can have a little without bingeing. I think sometimes people give specific foods and their cravings for them so much power and basically create a self-fulfilling prophesy. They convince themselves they have some kind of addiction or disorder, when really they have just created a habit and a psychological need. I'm not saying this is you, just putting it out there as something to think about! I found once I focused on eating a varied, balanced diet and planning treats into my day, they lost the power. I didn't have to eat all of it, because I had already given myself permission to have some today, tomorrow, and the day after, with no guilt.
And I mean this sincerely, if you believe you are behaving in the way drug addicts behave, there is no shame or harm in talking to someone about it.
Congrats on your success, and hang in there!
^^^
Really good post.
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RelCanonical wrote: »Some people are abstainers, not moderators, and that's okay. But it also means you can't have cheat days if you're an abstainer, because you can't moderate. Maybe the cheat days are making it worse because you're anticipating the food.
Personally this may be the most helpful post that I have read in a long time. I knew all things in moderation was very wrong advice in my case but I never really understood why before your post.
Thanks @RelCanonical4 -
GaleHawkins wrote: »RelCanonical wrote: »Some people are abstainers, not moderators, and that's okay. But it also means you can't have cheat days if you're an abstainer, because you can't moderate. Maybe the cheat days are making it worse because you're anticipating the food.
Personally this may be the most helpful post that I have read in a long time. I knew all things in moderation was very wrong advice in my case but I never really understood why before your post.
Thanks @RelCanonical
I just learned about it recently myself. I can't recall the thread I found it in (somewhere on MFP) but I kept the link the person shared: https://gretchenrubin.com/2012/10/back-by-popular-demand-are-you-an-abstainer-or-a-moderator/
I'm definitely a moderator, haha.2 -
It's the same argument we've had eleventy thousand times on this site and the two sides will never concede the other's point.
I say if it's a problem (and I fall on the abstainer side) then find which way works and like every other life decision, own it.3 -
I think you would enjoy Habit by Duhigg. It will give you insights in to the reward cycle.
Find some alternatives to the food reward.
Mental resistance just makes obsessions stronger. The trick is to diminish and redirect.
Diminish - it’s only food.
Redirect - what other rewards are you missing out on? Look forward to something else besides food.
Alternatives that work for me, as I am a closet introvert, include a bubble bath, a good book, a walk, knitting, and painting.3 -
@jgnatca I just love the diminish and redirect strategy. Im already dreading not eating my Sunday cheat day breakfast already, I know it's not rational. But this strategy gave me hope. Diminish, it's just food and Redirect, wow!!! Never even considered what I'm missing out on. That drive for reward from food is so powerful, it's ridiculous but true for some of us. I'm treating it like a drug habit, like the lie that it is and hopefully get back on track to losing the 40 pounds I've left to go.4
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Yup, I get it. I have these mental arguments with myself about how well I've eaten all day and how it would be ok to sneak something in and then my other half tells myself not to ruin the day. It's exhausting. And I look forward to my weekly cheat meal, but sometimes it turns into multiple "mini" cheat meals throughout the week. I know I have a highly addictive personality, both of my parents are/were alcoholics, and my addiction is junk food. I've found that I enjoy real, home cooked food more than some of my old staples, but candy and sweets are still super tempting and delicious. I wish more than anything that I had better self-control but I don't so I do the best I can.3
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There might actually be a reason why some foods give us stronger cravings than others. It's because they really are addictive. On low carb (no grains or dairy) I don't really feel hungry most of the day. Whenever I eat those foods the next day I start being really hungry. You can read about gluteomorphins (grains) and casomorphin (dairy) if you are interested in that kind of stuff. These things also exist in some plants but the two mentioned are probably the ones we eat most of.
https://livinglovecommunity.com/2017/04/23/gluten-morhpine-connection/
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-14423/6-foods-that-behave-like-addictive-drugs-in-your-body.html10 -
@orngnerdz I struggled with other way harsher addictions and it's the same with food, with lesser social consequences. I've found out it's not about self control but little tricks, like filling yourself up with nutritious food so you're less likely to be tempted. Also, I'm addicted to junk food so getting rid of it, not letting it in my system, diminishes physical cravings. Like a drug or alcohol, once you have a little taste it's all downhill from there. My biggest struggle now is the mental aspect of it, not imagining my life without sweets. Which is one of the symptoms of addiction. Thankfully as others have mentioned, the more you go without junk food, the more the cravings will lose their power.3
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