RUDE trainer/coach!!!

fysicallyfit
fysicallyfit Posts: 5 Member
edited December 19 in Motivation and Support
During my weekly weigh in with a hired trainer/coach, after a 2lb gain was told that I need to work harder to get to a goal of being under 150lbs. When beginning with this coach almost 90 days ago, I clearly stated my goal was to shred down to 160lbs (I started the year at 184) by December 31st. As I started getting closer to that 160 mark back in November he changed the goal to 150lbs. I said ok. So now this month that I am at 157, magically the goal has went to “under 150”. And he is swearing up and down I initially agreed to this. I then stated with clarity that when I reach 150, I will be evaluating whether I continue with him because my ORIGINAL plan was to shred down then put on muscle working with a trainer or system specifically for that. He then goes into a bunch a nonsense about I need to trust his system and I should be doing cardio and toning. He then begins belittling me by telling me I think I’m “Miss big time” with my little 14lb weight loss and proceeded to tell me what I am going to do! Now what has happened here? Because last time I checked this was my body and my journey and I can go about it anyway I chose. I didn’t appreciate his tone and belittling of my progress thus far. I’ve actually lost almost 24lbs this year which means I made almost just as much progress working by myself. Thoughts?

Replies

  • Travelgirl201818
    Travelgirl201818 Posts: 3 Member
    This is not what you need. You’re doing great and your trainer should be your #1 support system. Probably time to switch trainers. It needs to be about you. 💗.
  • fysicallyfit
    fysicallyfit Posts: 5 Member
    Thank you ladies. I totally agree!
  • Boxn_n_Bellydancn
    Boxn_n_Bellydancn Posts: 171 Member
    Yikes! Time to reassess the relationship. Maybe have a chat with him about the conversation and what he was trying to convey. Has he ever been that way before to you?
  • kaizaku
    kaizaku Posts: 1,039 Member
    Report a complaint. Don't go to him.
  • MaggieGirl135
    MaggieGirl135 Posts: 1,033 Member
    He is bullying you and you do not need to explain why you will no longer use his services. This is not just your journey; this is also your life. Follow the advice you would give a good friend, if they posed this problem to you. Hugs.
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
    Great responses OP--ditch him, and have no regrets. Go it alone for bit, and look around carefully if you decide to find a replacement.
  • Therealobi1
    Therealobi1 Posts: 3,262 Member
    Nothing to think about at all. Find a new trainer. what an idiot. Regardless of how much you have lost who is he to comment. Pushing you is good but he is taking the mick.

    Good luck with a new trainer.
  • missysippy930
    missysippy930 Posts: 2,577 Member
    Find a new trainer or continue on your own.
    You are in charge, not him.
    Best of luck to you, and congratulations on your success in 2018!
  • cariwaldick
    cariwaldick Posts: 189 Member
    Some people confuse belittling and condescension with tough love and motivation. You're the one paying and doing the hard work. Find someone who's a better fit. If he's tearing you down to rebuild you in his image, it's not healthy.
  • CowboySar
    CowboySar Posts: 404 Member
    Fire him
  • MsBaz2018
    MsBaz2018 Posts: 384 Member
    I don't care what he says. 14 lbs is a big deal!
    Congrats on your progress. Might be time to evaluate HIM. Maybe your money's not good for him anymore
  • ultra_violets
    ultra_violets Posts: 202 Member
    He sounds like an abusive jerk, to be honest. I think he forgot who works for whom. I wonder if he speaks to his male clients in such a patronizing and belittling fashion. Dump him and find a trainer who can actually communicate with you with respect and support instead of being a *kitten*.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    I'd be finding a new personal trainer if I was you!
  • fysicallyfit
    fysicallyfit Posts: 5 Member
    I would like to thank all of you for your responses. Each and everyone of you are right. What he said really bothered me for the past couple of days. But I realized he resorted to this kind of talk because of my statement of “evaluating” whether to continue. He is threatened by my success and graduating to the next level, simply because he needs the money. And maybe deep down he is also threatened by my health and fitness knowledge, professionalism, and beauty (yeah I said it), because it could be used to do what he’s doing 10 times better!
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