Food addicts/Compulsive eaters...
KatiePeca
Posts: 314 Member
I know there was an old thread for Overeaters annonymous, but it doesn't seem to be recent and I was hoping to start a fresh thread for some support.
I am most certainly addicted to food, I have been a compulsive eater since I was a child. Here are the criteria for OA:
Do you eat when you’re not hungry?
Do you go on eating binges for no apparent reason?
Do you have feelings of guilt and remorse after overeating?
Do you give too much time and thought to food?
Do you look forward with pleasure and anticipation to the time when you can eat alone?
Do you plan these secret binges ahead of time?
Do you eat sensibly before others and make up for it alone?
Is your weight affecting the way you live your life?
Have you tried to diet for a week (or longer), only to fall short of your goal?
Do you resent others telling you to “use a little willpower” to stop overeating?
Despite evidence to the contrary, have you continued to assert that you can diet “on your own” whenever you wish?
Do you crave to eat at a definite time, day or night, other than mealtime?
Do you eat to escape from worries or trouble?
Have you ever been treated for obesity or a food-related condition?
Does your eating behavior make you or others unhappy?
I can answer yes to almost all of them.
Losing weight is a constant up hill challenge for me, and not because I don't want it, but because the desire to food, and the desire to eat, so intertwined with my emotions, that I am literally battling myself for success, I am both a champion for my cause, and my own nemesis. I don't want to make excuses for why I have failed in the past, but I think it is helpful to honestly state the actual battle I am fighting.
Battling this nature of addiction, it's so tricky, because unlike an alcoholic or a drug user, I can't give up food "cold turkey", I have to continue to eat, while walking a very fine line and avoiding trigger foods, trigger people, and trigger emotions that can blow my resolve and my plan to pieces! I find that when I get really determined to succeed, I often start to feel like the simple act of eating, is cheating, and I can feel myself transitioning from one end of the eating disorder spectrum to the other.
I know I am not alone, and that many people here have a similar affliction. I am hoping to make some friends here, so we can support one another and perhaps find some ability in ourselves to overcome and find success. I'm a busy mom, with a nearly 6 year old, nearly 4 year old and neary 5 month old at home with me, I'm not looking to attend meetings at this time. Since I am also Christian and leaning on God for support, I feel like I am already familiar and acting on OA's 12 steps.
Can't wait to start talking with people who really understand the nature of this beast!
Katie
I am most certainly addicted to food, I have been a compulsive eater since I was a child. Here are the criteria for OA:
Do you eat when you’re not hungry?
Do you go on eating binges for no apparent reason?
Do you have feelings of guilt and remorse after overeating?
Do you give too much time and thought to food?
Do you look forward with pleasure and anticipation to the time when you can eat alone?
Do you plan these secret binges ahead of time?
Do you eat sensibly before others and make up for it alone?
Is your weight affecting the way you live your life?
Have you tried to diet for a week (or longer), only to fall short of your goal?
Do you resent others telling you to “use a little willpower” to stop overeating?
Despite evidence to the contrary, have you continued to assert that you can diet “on your own” whenever you wish?
Do you crave to eat at a definite time, day or night, other than mealtime?
Do you eat to escape from worries or trouble?
Have you ever been treated for obesity or a food-related condition?
Does your eating behavior make you or others unhappy?
I can answer yes to almost all of them.
Losing weight is a constant up hill challenge for me, and not because I don't want it, but because the desire to food, and the desire to eat, so intertwined with my emotions, that I am literally battling myself for success, I am both a champion for my cause, and my own nemesis. I don't want to make excuses for why I have failed in the past, but I think it is helpful to honestly state the actual battle I am fighting.
Battling this nature of addiction, it's so tricky, because unlike an alcoholic or a drug user, I can't give up food "cold turkey", I have to continue to eat, while walking a very fine line and avoiding trigger foods, trigger people, and trigger emotions that can blow my resolve and my plan to pieces! I find that when I get really determined to succeed, I often start to feel like the simple act of eating, is cheating, and I can feel myself transitioning from one end of the eating disorder spectrum to the other.
I know I am not alone, and that many people here have a similar affliction. I am hoping to make some friends here, so we can support one another and perhaps find some ability in ourselves to overcome and find success. I'm a busy mom, with a nearly 6 year old, nearly 4 year old and neary 5 month old at home with me, I'm not looking to attend meetings at this time. Since I am also Christian and leaning on God for support, I feel like I am already familiar and acting on OA's 12 steps.
Can't wait to start talking with people who really understand the nature of this beast!
Katie
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Replies
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Ok. Scary.
I am really surprised how many of those questions I answered yes to. The scariest one was "do you eat sensibly before others and make up for it alone?" This is SO me!! I eat really well in front of people - I would never think to eat candy bars and junk food in front of my co-workers. But, as related to another one of the questions, when I am alone, I plan elaborate binges. I have been known to plan a day for myself - I will say that I deserve a day to myself and take my son to daycare (I have weekdays off from my job) and go to the grocery store and buy whatever I want: cookies, brownies, pizza, chips and dip, soda, whatever... Its so shameful (another question you mentioned) and embarrassing so I only do it in private so I don't have to feel as bad.
I've always thought I had a weird addiction to food. I can't equate it with drugs because I've never been addicted to drugs, but I can say that you make a good point - we can't remove ourselves from food altogether (not saying it is easy to remove oneself from a drug environment). I still have to grocery shop and still stare at candy bars in the checkout lane or chips and soda taunting me from the end of aisles. It sucks. I've been pretty good the past couple months and really improved the way I eat, but, again with the questions, I always try to diet, then fail, but still state that I can do it whenever I put forth the willpower and drive. Hmmm... I feel good about my choices now and I cannot let myself fail this time around. Thank you for posting - very insightful and self-reflective.
Sending you a friend request! 0 -
I too am an OA dropout. I am a recovering compulsive overeater. OA was great for me at first and I was very successful (30 lbs. kept off for 2.5 years). I stopped going because I lost the weight, was no longer overeating, and was becoming compulsive about other things in my life. Plus, meetings became depressing (will not comment on why) and no longer strengthening.
Unfortunately since I left program, my old demons returned and I gained all the weight back (still didn't learn how to deal with stuff). Counseling was very therapeutic. I'm ready now to tackle my eating habits. This site has been terrific! Great support system. Great personal accountability. Good luck on your journey.0 -
Yes! I too can answer yes to most of these questions. Now what? I'm listening.0
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Hiya, im a mum too, to a 7yr old 6yr old and a 12 month old. I can relate to all them questions. I cant pin point what triggers me off it seems to be everything. i feel like im constantly adding calories in my head. im constantly aware of what i eat. I feel great when eating but feel crap after, i rarely feel hungry. im not over weight but since the birth of my last child ive carried that few extra pounds that im concious of. i have become a SAHM so now my eating habits are worse than ever and i would love it to stop. i.d love to eat and not feel quilty. i.d love not to have the urge to go and grab a biscuit out the cupboard.0
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Yes! I too can answer yes to most of these questions. Now what? I'm listening.
Well, since I'm not a member of OA and don't plan on attending in the near future, what is next for me is open discussion, accountibility, honesty with myself and others about my eating habits, and leaning on God and friends for support when I really struggle with breaking my dependancy on food, and I will need to do this often.
One issue I have, is that I know exactly how to lose weight, but getting over my mental and emotional barriers is where I struggle, and usually trip up and fail.
I guess since I do so much cheating in secret, what I need to do is end that secrecy and confess to my loved ones how deeply in bondage I am to food and my compulsive eating.
Katie0 -
I answer yes to a lot of these. I night binge, eat alone. I don't eat candy bars and chocolate and stuff. Just leftovers and what is in the house. I can just go though everything and not feel full.
I take personal responsibility for my actions. I realize what I am doing and accept the consequences. I try hard and have more good days than bad. Eventually I want to have all good days.
Also humor helps a lot. Working out helps. I would try to set goals for myself, but I really don't know what I'm doing, so my current goal is not to have a heart attack or stroke. Seems pretty reasonable.
If you figure out how to not be an addict, let me know.0 -
Oh, also .
Open your diary to everyone
Put your weight on your ticket, not pounds to go
its amazing how liberating it is.0 -
hi im jess and im a food addict. ive gone to one meeting and at this time i dont know if its for me. maybe sometime in the future. but i think this site is even better because ive met people like me. someone who really understands that food is sometimes ALL I THINK ABOUT!! i was house sitting and my friend left brownies, icecream, chips and dip. i was in heaven and in hell. my significant other was with me and im suppose to be good so i cant eat it but i sure had a hold of me. i was talking to her the other day saying that its all i thought about being in that house but even they people try they just dont get it. its so nice to talk to other people and just realize that your not alone! anyone reading this i would love to have you as a friend in the path that we are on.0
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Overeaters Anonymous is a great program; don't misunderstand. It helped me immensely by realizing that food was not the issue, but was just my weapon of choice (over drugs or alcohol). OA didn't tell me that; my 12 Step process did. As I said, counseling helped me get down to the nitty-gritty about why I was exhibiting compulsive behavior (after overeating, it became program, then work, then school). There are a million ways to avoid what's really going on. I also find it comforting to ask God for help, but that's me.0
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Glad so many people have jumped in here, thank you all for sharing, and for the friend adds!
Katie0 -
How do I apply what I know to what I do? I say "Stop eating." and can't. I'm like that great uncle who needed my grandmother to hide the scope and vanilla before a visit.0
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I'm still pretty new here (third day on MFP) and this is a thread I was searching for and I'm so glad I found it. I always knew I was a compulsive eater, living in a medical family will do that to you, but I loved food so much I didn't care. And that was the scary part. I weighed myself about three weeks ago and it said I was close to 250 pounds! AND I'M ONLY NINETEEN! Hearing all of you and knowing I'm not alone is a big motivation not to eat the block of cheese in my fridge and the ice cream in my freezer.0
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How do I apply what I know to what I do? I say "Stop eating." and can't. I'm like that great uncle who needed my grandmother to hide the scope and vanilla before a visit.
I learned through 12 Step. There is a workbook. You answer questions and learn about your habits. For me, I have just learned that avoiding (or "abstaining") from certain foods is easier than trying to limit them. For example, pasta is a big problem for me. It's easier for me to just give it up rather than try to limit it.0 -
I'd like to participate here, too. Tomorrow will be 3 weeks since I've committed to a new lifestyle. I've been doing really well eating healthy and exercising. But it's SOOOO, SOOOO hard for me. I am a food addict. I can answer yes to many of those questions. I would never imagine eating a whole container of oreos in 1 day in front of people--I've done it secretly. And when my husband asked what happened to the cookies, I'll say I left them out on the counter and the dog ate them. I'd be so ashamed to tell him the truth. I've also been known to eat supper at my grandparents' house and then drive thru McDonalds on the way home for another meal. I'd never do that if DH was with me, though. I always feel so guilty after doing things like that. I hate it. I don't want to be that way anymore.
3 weeks ago I had a breaking point, and I decided that I can no longer kill myself with food. I was so ashamed to see 298 on the scale when I weighed myself. It was my highest weight ever, even when pregnant.
I'd love some support. Other people in my life have been really supportive, but no one really understands what it's like to battle an addiction with food. It's not like I can just stop eating, like you could stop smoking or drinking. I honestly haven't had a bite of junk in 3 weeks, other than a tiny piece of cake for my baby's first birthday. I'm really proud of myself, and I feel like I'm breaking my addiction. But that doesn't mean I'm never tempted. I still think about food all the time. And though it seems I have willpower, I still struggle daily to make the right choices. I keep telling myself that I'm going to win this battle one healthy choice at a time.0 -
@ Armywife, my earliest recollection of compulsive overeating was as a teen. It was my job to clear the table. The leftover pasta was supposed to go to the dog. Alone in the kitchen, I stuffed all the leftovers into my mouth as quickly as possible to avoid getting caught. You are not alone.0
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To all of you, please feel free to add me as a friend, I would be happy to offer you my support!
Katie0 -
I answer yes to a lot of these. I night binge, eat alone. I don't eat candy bars and chocolate and stuff. Just leftovers and what is in the house. I can just go though everything and not feel full.
I take personal responsibility for my actions. I realize what I am doing and accept the consequences. I try hard and have more good days than bad. Eventually I want to have all good days.
Also humor helps a lot. Working out helps. I would try to set goals for myself, but I really don't know what I'm doing, so my current goal is not to have a heart attack or stroke. Seems pretty reasonable.
If you figure out how to not be an addict, let me know.
I love every bit of this. Thank you.0 -
I can answer yes to everyone of those questions, which has shocked me a little although I have been like that for aslong as i can remember an i really would love to atleast control some of those things and finally achieve my goal weight. If anyone would like a friend on here for support and someone you can be honest with who wont judge then i am happy to help, as i could also use the support from someone in the same position x0
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Wonderful topic! Thank-you so much for your honesty. It is so hard to cope when we think we are the only one who struggles. The guilt and shame, the vicious cycle. I completely understand and suffer too.
Blessings to all,
Cinderella :flowerforyou:0 -
This is so so so so so me. I shove food into my mouth so fast when I'm home alone and no one is looking. I get a high off of sweets and greasy fried food and especially carbs. Oh, how I love carbs.....!
It's so hard. Harder than I ever imagined. I am my own worst enemy. I obsessively figure out how long I need to work out at the gym to be able to eat a certain meal or dessert without having to feel guilty. It's like food runs my life.0 -
Someone her on MFP has directed me to online OA meetings, I have been to three today, and I am FOUND! How wonderful, send me a message if you want to know more
Katie0 -
Someone her on MFP has directed me to online OA meetings, I have been to three today, and I am FOUND! How wonderful, send me a message if you want to know more
Katie: Can you post the info here?
I'm so grateful to see this thread. I was just visiting a thread about a woman in the UK who is vying to be the fastest woman alive. The responses to that from folks didn't talk about food addiction, just judged her. Food addiction is real and it kills people. My sister just died in February from her food addiction and I'm still reeling.0 -
Btw, I am addicted to sugar but am also a recovering alcoholic, still go to AA. The sugar helped me get sober from alcohol and I know I need to get off the sugar but need to balance that with my alcoholism. They say it's what'll kill you first that you work on.
My mom achieved wonderful serenity and sobriety in Overeaters Anonymous. I debate going myself but feel overwhelmed with AA. As a trusted friend told me when I was struggling with my drinking, I know where to go when I decide I need the help.
I'm so glad to have found you all.
God bless.
Susan0 -
It is not unusual to find recovering alcoholics at OA meeting. It is also not unusual to find members there who come from a family with a history of alcoholism. I pray for all of those still suffering.0
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Someone her on MFP has directed me to online OA meetings, I have been to three today, and I am FOUND! How wonderful, send me a message if you want to know more
Katie
Great to hear!0
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