500 lbs and the Biggest Loser?

jennib06
jennib06 Posts: 101 Member
in Motivation and Support
So, today has been a super rough day. I'm not one to post on these topics, but I figured where better to do it than where I know people will be kind. I recently moved home to help my family out with some things, which was necessary. My family is in denial of the things that is going on, therefore they do not understand why I am here. (Well my dad does, but he denies the convorsation that we had about me coming home) It has just been tough re-adjusting. I came from college where I was super independant and really only answered to myself. Now I'm getting the "your back in our house which means your under our rules again." Which is totally understandable, but I wish I could just be looked at as an adult.

Anyways, I guess that is me just ranting, tonight after supper I had asked my dad if we could get a new scale (I have one, but for some reason the weight on it changed by 20 lbs in the past 2 days and I know that is not possible). My little brother who is 12 said something of the "why did you break it mrs. 500 lbs...why don't you just go to biggestloser.com". I am not anywhere near 500 lbs and him saying that really just cut me...deep! I feel like I'm trying so hard to be here for the family and to be what they need without any expectations. But my parents just defended him after he said it...and I was so hurt. I need patience right now. I need understanding, encouragement, and the willpower to keep going to make this lifestyle change so that when those comments are made they won't affect me because there wont be an ounce of truth in them.

I guess I'm just bleh...

Replies

  • jennib06
    jennib06 Posts: 101 Member
    So, today has been a super rough day. I'm not one to post on these topics, but I figured where better to do it than where I know people will be kind. I recently moved home to help my family out with some things, which was necessary. My family is in denial of the things that is going on, therefore they do not understand why I am here. (Well my dad does, but he denies the convorsation that we had about me coming home) It has just been tough re-adjusting. I came from college where I was super independant and really only answered to myself. Now I'm getting the "your back in our house which means your under our rules again." Which is totally understandable, but I wish I could just be looked at as an adult.

    Anyways, I guess that is me just ranting, tonight after supper I had asked my dad if we could get a new scale (I have one, but for some reason the weight on it changed by 20 lbs in the past 2 days and I know that is not possible). My little brother who is 12 said something of the "why did you break it mrs. 500 lbs...why don't you just go to biggestloser.com". I am not anywhere near 500 lbs and him saying that really just cut me...deep! I feel like I'm trying so hard to be here for the family and to be what they need without any expectations. But my parents just defended him after he said it...and I was so hurt. I need patience right now. I need understanding, encouragement, and the willpower to keep going to make this lifestyle change so that when those comments are made they won't affect me because there wont be an ounce of truth in them.

    I guess I'm just bleh...
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    So, today has been a super rough day. I'm not one to post on these topics, but I figured where better to do it than where I know people will be kind. I recently moved home to help my family out with some things, which was necessary. My family is in denial of the things that is going on, therefore they do not understand why I am here. (Well my dad does, but he denies the convorsation that we had about me coming home) It has just been tough re-adjusting. I came from college where I was super independant and really only answered to myself. Now I'm getting the "your back in our house which means your under our rules again." Which is totally understandable, but I wish I could just be looked at as an adult.

    Anyways, I guess that is me just ranting, tonight after supper I had asked my dad if we could get a new scale (I have one, but for some reason the weight on it changed by 20 lbs in the past 2 days and I know that is not possible). My little brother who is 12 said something of the "why did you break it mrs. 500 lbs...why don't you just go to biggestloser.com". I am not anywhere near 500 lbs and him saying that really just cut me...deep! I feel like I'm trying so hard to be here for the family and to be what they need without any expectations. But my parents just defended him after he said it...and I was so hurt. I need patience right now. I need understanding, encouragement, and the willpower to keep going to make this lifestyle change so that when those comments are made they won't affect me because there wont be an ounce of truth in them.

    I guess I'm just bleh...

    12 years old....forgive them Lord for they know not what they do
  • AmandaJ
    AmandaJ Posts: 1,950 Member
    I understand the words hurt and I am sorry, but Dave198 is right. He is 12 and a dork! Hang in there sweetie and while you are living maybe you could teach him some sensitivity! :ohwell: :flowerforyou:
  • Frost
    Frost Posts: 312 Member
    Oh Honey! Kids say awful things and that's the way it is. Don't listen. As for your father well he should know better and I'm sorry you went through that.

    I did much the same thing you're doing when my Dad was ill. You may have to re-think this decision if it's not the healthiest emotionally for you. I know I wish I had done things differently.
  • Mattysmomma
    Mattysmomma Posts: 268
    I totally understand. Sometimes it nice to do what you want, when you want. Believe it or not when my fiancee and I first moved in together it felt like I had to tell him exactly what I was doing and when. I am sooo stubborn that I hated it, well, I eventually got over it (4 years later, we're obviously still together)

    But it is hard to adjust to someone else's expectations, especially your parents! :grumble: Good luck hun!
  • awestfall
    awestfall Posts: 1,774 Member
    You can do this and don't let it get you down what your brother said.I have had similar issues in the past with my family members making rude comments about my weight so let it go and look at it this way.When you get to the goal you want to be then you can show off for them and say I knew I could do it and I believed in ME!!YOu can do this and you are worth losing the weight.Stick to it and anytime you need someone to talk to hop on her and send me a message ok.
  • mgeek40
    mgeek40 Posts: 36
    Family can be the cruelist of all the people in our lives. Remember you are doing this for you and keep that in your heart!
  • Nich0le
    Nich0le Posts: 2,906 Member
    Not to agree with how it was handled but I think my husband said it best the other day when we were discussing a situation with my parents when my dad made a remark about my mother's weight. Now the situation was different and my dad has never been one to put my mom down about her weight but I can tell he is worried about her overall health and so he is trying his best to encourage her to get moving and get back in shape.

    Perhaps your family doesn't handle it the way you would like, and you can't expect a 12 year old kid to have a clue about your feelings, heck, I had to talk to my 14 year old about how to handle different views of religion without putting her friends down, kids don't know how to sugar coat things!

    Anyway, my husband said that those closest to you should be the ones to be brutally honest with you. Who better to share that they worry about you than your family. It may not always feel good and your family may not always have the best words to use but speaking truthfully about your weight might actually make it easier for you to help yourself.

    Take it for what it's worth and let it go and get on with making changes in your life that make you healthier. You are old enough, smart enough and you deserve to do this for yourself! Make it happen now because life has a pesky way of getting in the way!

    Well, of course you can always come here for advice, support and strength to build a better, stronger you! :flowerforyou:
  • jennib06
    jennib06 Posts: 101 Member
    Thanks everyone for the kind words...I went for a run and while it was freezing cold and I think I may have gotten wind burn, it was great to have time to just process and breathe (well in the emotional sense anyways).

    P.S. the stars that I haven't taken the time to notice in a good while, the comfort of the pavement meeting my soles, and the whispers from above deffinately made it well worth while!
  • joonieB
    joonieB Posts: 101
    I can commiserate with you--it was 13 years ago when my husband and I moved into my parents' basement for a year but I can remember all those feelings you described, just like it was yesterday! While my situation was different, I definitely had problems between my parents and my younger siblings still living at home too. You did the right thing by going out and literally getting some "fresh air". My husband and I used to have to go for a Sunday drive every week just to have a break and natter about all the things that had irritated us that week!

    It sounds like you understand what is going on, but that your feelings are hurt (naturally). Just keep focused on what you know to be right. Every day you make a better choice, whether for your physical or spiritual or mental health, is a day well spent and worth the effort. Don't give up!
  • donaldstokley
    donaldstokley Posts: 18 Member
    Just a couple weeks ago I had a little girl in the store point and tell her mommy look how big he is. I know people say it's just a child but that doesn't change how it made me feel. I think I was more upset that the mother didn't correct her and let her know how rude that is instead she just ignored her and pretended it didn't happen.
  • 150poundsofme
    150poundsofme Posts: 523 Member
    Hugs
  • LyndaBSS
    LyndaBSS Posts: 6,964 Member
    I'm so sorry for your emotional pain.

    We have lots of support for you here. You rant any time you want and we'll have hugs waiting. <3
  • missysippy930
    missysippy930 Posts: 2,577 Member
    Fact is, words can hurt, and families can be the worst. I can still remember painful things family members said to me over 50 years ago, when I was 10. They are long gone, but the painful memories linger. Adults should know better, and 12 year olds learn by example and consequences for words and actions. You are definitely the better person. I’m so sorry for your pain and hurt from those you love.

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