Guilty pleasure

I used to write romantic zombie fan fiction.

A lot of my friends are into the hardcore gaming scene; some of them play professionally in tournaments (fighting games mostly). I try to keep up appearances and pretend I enjoy the rush of difficulty, but the truth is..

I absolutely love cheating, and I love god mode above all else. It's not even necessarily about cheating, it's the fact that I can craft my own story in my own head while playing, without having to worry about game elements interfering with that. When I play Civ 5 I use a mod that allows me to edit everything. I usually play the game straight forward, but I'm continuously editing and changing things to make the game "better" and to fit my story.

When direct cheating isn't available I will grind mercilessly. I will do it well beyond the point of being "fun", simply with the intention of later on having fun without the need to again rely on the game mechanics. This is primarily with RPGs, and it's not like I don't enjoy the questing, gathering, finding secrets, leveling process - I live for that sort of thing. I just find it more enjoyable if I can say spend 60 hours in the starting zone and grinding endlessly to get to 99. Or like NieR (one of my favorite games); I found out early on about the phoenix spear as being one of the most powerful weapons.

So instead of playing the game naturally - I fished, and I spent hours of my time grinding out fishing until I had enough money to buy the spear, I wasn't even at the part of the story where I could buy it yet. Once I had the money I continued to grind out fishing until I'd never have to worry about money again.

Then when I got it, the first thing I did was find the quickest and most efficient way of upgrading it. There are 4 levels, I think I got all 4. There were far easier and quicker ways of doing it later on in the game, but I chose to put hours into grinding it out anyway.

It's weird and pointless, but it's what I love.