Hi, my name is Nikki & I'm a binge eater =(

Nikki206
Nikki206 Posts: 69
edited October 1 in Motivation and Support
I had been doing so great for 2.5 weeks, logging my food, watching what I was eating etc. I even went to a fair and did not eat a thing which for me is amazing considering the deep fried cheese on a stick and cream puffs always seem to call my name. I even got nauseous when I smelled the waffles that they load up with powdered sugar. On Saturday night I went to my boss's house for a get together and decided to get a small piece of dessert and ate reasonable portions of everthing. I actually ended up feeling miserable because I had been eating so healthy for the previous 2.5 weeks and then I ate a plate full of crap even if it was smaller portion sizes than I normally would have eaten. I even had a hard time with the dessert and I was thinking, "Wow! This is a new thing for me!" since sweets have always been my weakness. Ever since then I have been on a downward spiral. Haven't logged my food, skipped breakfast two days in a row, didn't eat ANYTHING until after five on Sunday. Tonight I went on a diet pepsi and pizza binge. The entire time I knew what I was doing was horrible and I felt miserable but it was my old habit coming back with a vengeance! :grumble:

I know this is not the end of the world and tomorrow is a new day. I'm just praying that I haven't undone all of my hard work. I know it's my emotional eating as I am applying to a new job and had to have my car fixed today which brought up budget concerns as well as my boyfriend telling me that there is a good chance he may be getting laid off later this year. There is no excuse for this and since I KNOW what my triggers are I should have stopped myself. :angry:

So I have figured out a list of stuff I need to do.
1. ATTN: My fitness pal friends! I need you to do some nagging! If you don't see my completed food log by 8 p.m., start asking me where it is. I'm sorry to drag you into this but I know we are here to support each other and this is what I need. That food log keeps me accountable!
2. I know that my weakest time is after my boyfriend goes to bed between 9 & 10. I have always struggled with insomnia and during the hours I'm awake and he is not I have a habit of binge eating. So I need to start getting myself into bed by 10:30 at the latest. Not only will this make my mornings much better but I am eliminating the hours in which I know I am prone to bingeing.
3. I need to start blogging or writing on the message boards when I feel myself getting to that point.
4. Read the success stories EVERYDAY!!!! I need to keep motivated!

TOMORROW I'M GETTING SERIOUS!!!!!!!!! Again...lol :smile:

Replies

  • malvakai
    malvakai Posts: 32
    You're 2.5 weeks ahead, remember that part. You havent really taken any steps backward at all. You just stopped moving forward. The very next step you take is forward movement again.

    I'm a binge eater too.

    Cake mix. I cant buy it or I'll eat it, in the worst possible way at the worst possible time... late night, alone, in the dark, hating myself.

    I've been good for a week, logging my meals and exercising most days. I'm with you. Next step forward.
  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
    Nikki, hang in there. I have had those days too. The positive side of eating outside of your norm is that your body may have been reaching a plateau. If it thinks that you're losing too much too quickly, it's harder to lose. Sometimes you have to eat more calories, but I get that you feel like it's out of control. So, take tomorrow and write down your feelings when you eat. Don't judge yourself. See what's triggering you. Maybe there's something bothering you that you need to deal with before you can get back on track. You don't have to be perfect in this journey, but over time if you're doing the right things most of the time, you'll succeed. The other thing is, I've learned recently, even if I regain a few pounds, I now have the ability to lose it again, before I regain 10 or 20 lbs. Good luck to you!
  • Nicholec2003
    Nicholec2003 Posts: 158 Member
    Hello! You can do this. I have only been on this website for a little over a week and it has already helped me in a huge way! The people here are great and very helpful.I totally get the binge eating and then feeling guilty about it. I have defintitely done my fair share of it. Feel free to add me as a friend if you want.
  • chevy88grl
    chevy88grl Posts: 3,937 Member
    We all have days when we not only fall off the wagon, but we run the complete other way from it.

    Tomorrow IS a new day.

    If you KNOW that you'll want to snack and have some munchies later in the evening - save some calories for that time of the night. Make healthy food choices (like veggies with light ranch) but go ahead and eat. When you get into the mindset of "I can't do this or I can't do that...." it's too much like a "diet" and not enough like a "lifestyle".

    You can do this. I promise you can.

    (BTW, I was a binge eater too. As I'm sure many other people on this website were too. I've managed to overcome the need to binge eat - but it wasn't easy.... You can do it too!).


    Good Luck and take care!
  • rainbowcandy2004
    rainbowcandy2004 Posts: 44
    HI NIkki, I am a binge eater as well and I feel your pain. I use to do the same thing you did, I was really good for a few weeks and had one bad day and it all went down hill. I went to see a weight management doctor and she gave me some good tips and one is that if I "fall off the wagon" I just need to forget about it and start fresh the next meal or day. I have taken this advice to heart. For instance this past Sunday I over indulged and ate almost 4000 calories and boy was I sick all night. I also understand your stress and eating, I lost my phone and was very upset and I just wanted to eat and eat but I did not. I told myself I was not hungry. I understand that you might not have that will power but you need to keep healthy snacks on hand so when those attacks occur you can eat a bag of baby carrots instead of that bag of chips. Take each day as a new day.
  • soniaa777
    soniaa777 Posts: 126 Member
    maybe you can try chewing gum or having some altoids than the food will taste not so great. I will do good and than go "insane" sometimes like i cant control myself. mints are good.
  • aquasw16
    aquasw16 Posts: 342 Member
    I hear ya sister. I am the same way. Pretty much to the "t". I will be here for you, add me.
  • Shamaka
    Shamaka Posts: 1
    Hey Nikki,


    relax babe. A sucessful diet is a diet that you can maintain for life. If you like to binge on pizza and diet coke when you are stressed, then binge away. Just know that you will not always be stressed. Also I make myself earn calories. So if you go over your daily calories, then you "owe" yourself to work off the difference. It is normal to want pizza and cola occasiknally. When I am pmsing I eat what I want, howevee I now require smaller portions and I am less inclined to binge know that it is ok to eat as much pizza everyonce in awhile. Forgive the typos I am on a touch screen and tired. Be blessed and goos luck with your weight loss!
  • Nikki206
    Nikki206 Posts: 69
    You're 2.5 weeks ahead, remember that part. You havent really taken any steps backward at all. You just stopped moving forward. The very next step you take is forward movement again.

    I'm a binge eater too.

    Cake mix. I cant buy it or I'll eat it, in the worst possible way at the worst possible time... late night, alone, in the dark, hating myself.

    I've been good for a week, logging my meals and exercising most days. I'm with you. Next step forward.

    I like how you worded it, "late night, alone, in the dark, hating myself." The fact that I hide it is another problem. I'm so embarrassed to admit this but I have ordered two drinks at the drive thru before just so the staff didn't know it was ALLLL for me. How do we get to this point! I used to be so athletic and healthy at 145 and I always thought I was fat because I had bigger thighs than my friends but they were all muscle....if I only knew what I know now.
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    Today is just another day but every day is just another day you have a chance to talk about how tomorrow is another day!
  • NyxDominique
    NyxDominique Posts: 271 Member

    I like how you worded it, "late night, alone, in the dark, hating myself." The fact that I hide it is another problem. I'm so embarrassed to admit this but I have ordered two drinks at the drive thru before just so the staff didn't know it was ALLLL for me. How do we get to this point! I used to be so athletic and healthy at 145 and I always thought I was fat because I had bigger thighs than my friends but they were all muscle....if I only knew what I know now.

    Most of the people on the website are in your shoes. I used a HIGHLY active person in high school. Then I got really sick and life took a turn for the worst. It has all gone downhill every since. 5 years I allowed myself to make 3-4 trips a day across the street to MCD. Closing my eyes and thinking how yummy everything was because no one was watching me. I didn't have to justify what or how much I was eating. There are still days I go up to 3000 calories.

    Just need to remember it is a LONG proccess. The goal is to keep going with it. Start over each day. Don't hate yourself for your past. Only think about what you want for the future!
  • sarasmile144
    sarasmile144 Posts: 108 Member
    I'm also a binge eater. Its a huge struggle, not ONLY with the binge eating (I've done the guilt, shame, and trying to 'hide' it by hiding wrappers or ordering extra drinks as well).... its also those periods when I'm almost not eating, because I'm just 'not hungry '. .... until I'm suddenly so.. overcome by the compulsion to stuff my face. I've totally been there, am STILL there.. but like others have said, I just tell myself I may slip, but I don't have to slide. I'm more hard on myself these days for missing a workout than eating junk.. I don't know that this will provide any inspiration, except to tell you you're not alone in your struggle... and if you keep up the good work, get back on the horse when you fall off, the rest will come.. Pretty soon, that healthy, inner person you've been making stronger and stronger will help you overcome your self sabatoge. Please forgive typos, I'm also on a touch screen and tired.
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