Feeling defeated for no reason

Have been eating maintenance all week and went over that yesterday. I just feel...like, what is the point? If I lose the next 35/40lbs, will still be “soft” with stretched skin. Am not usually this defeatist but have you experienced anything like this while you were actively losing? Am not in plateau, just suddenly feeling really down on myself. I know there can be a lot of emotions losing weight but why does it seem hopeless when I’m making great progress? Have been keeping at this since June and wondering if there is mental fatigue? I don’t know. Don’t like feeling like this and not sure why I am. Going to head to the gym and return back to deficit today but really wish I could get my head back into the game. Not sure what else to do.

Replies

  • dolliesdaughter
    dolliesdaughter Posts: 544 Member
    I feel like that when I am not getting enough rest.
  • jlynnm70
    jlynnm70 Posts: 460 Member
    Try getting a little more rest - and maybe find an activity that you wanted to try that is different than your normal routine..... Go play basketball instead of being on a treadmill. Go take dance lessons, tennis lessons, find a different route to take a walk.....just something to get out of the routine and to get excited about again. Sure - I'll never have the stomach I did in high school - but then again - I was a size 13 my junior prom and a size 6 my senior - so I've always been a little 'soft' - and I've had 4 kids since then! Just think about being healthy instead of firm.
  • Phirrgus
    Phirrgus Posts: 1,902 Member
    I need a change of routine every now and then, find something fresh and new that I enjoy. And don't forget what you've already accomplished. No one but you can take that away from you, and why would you want to do that? ;)

    I agree with the others about getting some rest too. It's a journey, there's no hurry, and we're all allowed to have an off day, or week. Hang in there :)
  • RelCanonical
    RelCanonical Posts: 3,882 Member
    I'm agreeing with the guys above - when I get too focused on weight loss is when I start feeling how you're feeling. I've had weeks where I could barely manage maintenance, and it does test your patience. I had to find other enriching activities to take my mind off of weight loss. I want to get a new pet, so I've been doing tons of research and making documents on how to care for them, and that's been a wonderful use of my time. It's kind of like finding things to enrich your life rather than just killing time.
  • smolmaus
    smolmaus Posts: 442 Member
    merekins wrote: »
    wondering if there is mental fatigue?

    In my experience, yes. But it could be unrelated as well, could be seasonal, hormonal, emotional, like others said maybe it is just real fatigue. I find when I'm just generally down in the dumps my body, my weightloss (or lack thereof), the drudgery of eating at a deficit etc etc is an easy thing to blame but it's not always really about that.

    "Do what makes you happy" sounds like such trite advice but anything that snaps you out of it. I sometimes go visit my mum, have a fancy bath with oils and a glass of wine, find a new fun recipe to try, anything you can label self care. I would prefer not to have that thing focused on diet or exercise personally but if it works for you it works.
  • CharlieCharlie007
    CharlieCharlie007 Posts: 246 Member
    edited February 2019
    Hormones, dopamine, epinephren, they suck.
  • CharlieCharlie007
    CharlieCharlie007 Posts: 246 Member
    edited February 2019
    Just stay consistent, even if you feel like giving up, you need to avoid the downward spiral that leads to rebound weight. Push through the wall.
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,702 Member
    It's normal. We all have our ups and downs. Even if we love our job we aren't super excited about it every day. Same thing with our spouse / SO. Most of the time we're happy with them (hopefully) but not 100% of the time.

    I agree that it may be time for a change of routine. In the meantime, don't over think it. It happens. It will pass.
  • rosiorama
    rosiorama Posts: 300 Member
    edited February 2019
    Have you been eating at a deficit since June?? You haven’t specified. That’s a long time! And congratulations, it sounds like you’ve made progress in that time too!

    Maybe it’s time to take a pause and be at maintenance so you can mentally regroup and think about your goals? Or, maybe test out what it is to maintain for a while and see how it feels to do that?

    There’s a thread on the forums here about refeeds, which are planned days of maintenance that give your body a break from living on a deficit. I didn’t know that was a thing until... last week. It seems that eating that little bit of extra calories as a planned part of your weight loss strategy is a kind and healthy thing to do for yourself.

    At any rate, it’s something to consider. When I wonder “what’s the point” of my eating and fitness goals, it’s always about my knee, which really starts to bother me when I start gaining weight. What are the benefits you’re getting from this journey?

    Be kind to yourself. It can absolutely be tiring. And taking a break doesn’t have to be a setback.
  • amy19355
    amy19355 Posts: 805 Member
    have you checked to see if your daily calorie needs have lowered since you lost all that weight?

    think about it: if your 30# heavier self needed x calories for maintencnec and you were in a deficit by x number each day to lose.
    well, then, once you have lost some, your daily needs are not as great, which means, if you maintain the same deficit you are at high risk for undereating.
    and that will lead to many of the symptoms you describe.

    lots of posts in the forum recommend rechecking your calorie needs at every 20 poiund change in weight.

    good luck
  • 150poundsofme
    150poundsofme Posts: 523 Member
    Big hugs
  • merekins
    merekins Posts: 228 Member
    I have mostly been in deficit since June with only a few holiday/special occasions as exceptions. Even then, I balanced those days out over week to at least maintenance. Took advice here and have been eating at maintenance since posting this and doing best to make sure I got enough sleep. Sleep is easier said than done but am doing better than I was. My weight has gone up but as I’ve been tracking it, pretty sure it’s water and not real gains. Went up four lbs but down two today. Know I’m not gaining on 1650 calories.
    Also, am switching running over to swimming and making new goals for that to work toward to change up routine.
    I think I am tired. Tired physically and mentally. It’s tedious and have been working on this for nearly 9mo. Allowing a bit of break for the next week and then go back to deficit.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 27,843 Member
    merekins wrote: »
    Have been eating maintenance all week and went over that yesterday. I just feel...like, what is the point? If I lose the next 35/40lbs, will still be “soft” with stretched skin. Am not usually this defeatist but have you experienced anything like this while you were actively losing? Am not in plateau, just suddenly feeling really down on myself. I know there can be a lot of emotions losing weight but why does it seem hopeless when I’m making great progress? Have been keeping at this since June and wondering if there is mental fatigue? I don’t know. Don’t like feeling like this and not sure why I am. Going to head to the gym and return back to deficit today but really wish I could get my head back into the game. Not sure what else to do.

    Is it winter where you are? I get the winter blahs. To counteract this, I bundle up and force myself outside to get some fresh air and sunshine.

    I have issues with mood if I don't exercise regularly.
  • merekins
    merekins Posts: 228 Member
    Oh yeah. Winter and crazy amount of snow and school closings.