Anyone out there have a child younger than 5 that is bipolor

☆ShawnsMom08☆
☆ShawnsMom08☆ Posts: 74 Member
edited October 1 in Chit-Chat
Parenthood is tough on any parent...

When my son was two and a half my parents made a comment about my sons behavior. I just brushed it off because I didn't want to think anything could be wrong my MY son. He slept six hours a night straight by the time he was six weeks old, he ate all veggies, dranks his milk, played well with others.... So after a long stressful day I got onto the computer. My ex is bipolar. I started reserching. Although there wasn't much on toddler bipolor what I did read I was able to diagnose it myself. I work in a doctors office and talk to many moms. Their children's terrible twos, threes and fours sounded like a picnic compared to what I delt with. After talking a women whose child was ADHD and older than mine, she told me about Almond milk. I tired it and within days my sons behavior changed. It improved. We discovered he was also lactose intolerance. I cut out cheese and other dairy products. I guess he had an allergy that wasn't physically noticable if you will. Well things are still hard. Some days like yesterday I wanted to just cry. It can be so frustrating. How do you guys deal with this? I have never shared this about my son to anyone. I just let the other monthers at the office vent about their days. I called a doctor after I realized what was going on and I was spoken to like a young dumb mom who wanted her child to be perfect. I don't expect him to be perfect, I just want help in coping. Needless to say I never went to the appointment. I am going to start looking around again for someone else to talk to. In the mean time is there things I can do defuse the situtations? I try to be patient. I think sometimes if I was a SAHM things would be easier. But right now that isn't possible. My son is so smart. He is funny too. But it seems with the switch flips...its really tough.

Replies

  • voluptas63
    voluptas63 Posts: 602 Member
    I'd be VERY careful with self diagnosis. Especially with such a diagnosis as bipolar. My brother is diagnosed with bipolar disorder and fights with it every day. There are plenty of studies out there that speak directly against diagnosing children as bipolar. Their brains/personalities etc are not formed enough to determine a bipolar diagnosis.

    You should really have your child examined by a specialist. And get a second opinion.
  • emilydmac
    emilydmac Posts: 382 Member
    Hi there,
    I am sorry to hear about your son, I am bipolar and have been all my life and my parents were put through hell. One thing that helped with me is that when that switch 'flipped' I was either put into a room where I could get it all out, or I was allowed to just vent it out, and then I had to talk to them about it which helped with my awareness, if he can act it out, but then needs to go through the discomfort of talking about it, how he felt and why he acted the way he did, he will be more aware (over a lot of time) when he starts to slip
    Good Luck- he is very young. I have found medication helps but again he is so young
  • ☆ShawnsMom08☆
    ☆ShawnsMom08☆ Posts: 74 Member
    Thats the plan. I just wanted advice on coping or suggestions to help make the days better.
  • wickedcricket
    wickedcricket Posts: 1,246 Member
    this is pretty vague. What is the child doing? Young children will act out when confused and/or frustrated. It sounds to me like he needs a psychologist. Both of you just need to learn coping behavior. Perhaps he's upset about you splitting with his father? Some (many) children do not like big changes - like moving & stuff - and they will act out. Young children act out because they don't KNOW what they're feeling or have the words or ability to express.
    When he is calm, let him draw or give him legos and perhaps he will indicate what's bothering him. And call a behaviorist/psychologist - IF it is troubled behavior, you want to get a handle on that ASAP
  • polar5554
    polar5554 Posts: 576 Member
    WHAT SHE SAID... ^
  • ☆ShawnsMom08☆
    ☆ShawnsMom08☆ Posts: 74 Member
    Hi there,
    I am sorry to hear about your son, I am bipolar and have been all my life and my parents were put through hell. One thing that helped with me is that when that switch 'flipped' I was either put into a room where I could get it all out, or I was allowed to just vent it out, and then I had to talk to them about it which helped with my awareness, if he can act it out, but then needs to go through the discomfort of talking about it, how he felt and why he acted the way he did, he will be more aware (over a lot of time) when he starts to slip
    Good Luck- he is very young. I have found medication helps but again he is so young

    Thank you. I have been trying to do that actaully. After he has calmed down I have been asking him what upset him so much. I try to be understanding. I just want him to be a safe, healthy and happy kid.
  • ☆ShawnsMom08☆
    ☆ShawnsMom08☆ Posts: 74 Member
    Hi there,
    I am sorry to hear about your son, I am bipolar and have been all my life and my parents were put through hell. One thing that helped with me is that when that switch 'flipped' I was either put into a room where I could get it all out, or I was allowed to just vent it out, and then I had to talk to them about it which helped with my awareness, if he can act it out, but then needs to go through the discomfort of talking about it, how he felt and why he acted the way he did, he will be more aware (over a lot of time) when he starts to slip
    Good Luck- he is very young. I have found medication helps but again he is so young

    Thank you. I have been trying to do that actaully. After he has calmed down I have been asking him what upset him so much. I try to be understanding. I just want him to be a safe, healthy and happy kid.
  • anacsitham5
    anacsitham5 Posts: 810 Member
    I understand completely and it is hard to deal with. Funny my son was lactose intollerant too. Actually when he was born he was allergic to everything (food/drink wise). It took them 4 months to find something he could drink without projectile vomiting and that wouldn't eat away his skin when he pee'd. He was very ill at that point. By the time he was 10 he was annoyed that we would go for ice cream and he couldn't have any because it would make him ill. He started forcing himself to drink milk and now drinks a gallon a day!

    My husband refused to believe he was anything other than a terrible two toddler, a teen acting out, etc... so it was hard dealing with everything with no support. We didn't do meds with him due to this, but the side effects aren't good with them anyways. His mood swings have actually gotten better with age. He is an adult now and he will still fly off the handle quicker than the other ones when he gets upset, but it doesn't last as long. We always teased him that he had PMS (prehistoric male syndrome). Being the mom, I'm usually the one he will take the mood swings out on, but usually apologizes after that. Not that it makes it better or any easier. I guess he's not as bad as he could have been but as a parent it is quite difficult to deal with. There have been and were days that I just wanted to pack my bags and run away so I wouldn't have to deal with it. You hang in there and do what you need to do.
  • cdskates
    cdskates Posts: 49 Member
    I'm not the mother of one, but my sister was diagnosed at 9 with a bipolar disorder. They said they couldn't go too much younger than that age because the child's brains are still growing at such a rapid rate.

    Now, something that helped my mother with me when I was a small child was cutting out red dye. I had an allergic reaction to it that didn't send me into shock or make me break out in hives, I turned into a completely different person. Usually I'd be hyper and run around, but I'd also get pretty mean with it. Maybe you could look at when your son turns into the person that makes you want to cry and see what he's had to eat those days--there may be somethin there.

    And as the first reply said, don't make any assumptions based on the internet and self diagnose your son, it could easily be something else entirely. Let a doctor decide, and if you don't like the way he's treating you/him go to another until you feel satisfied that they're actually looking at your son, not your "unreasonable expectations". You just want to make sure your son's okay--there's NOTHING wrong with that.
  • allenlisa
    allenlisa Posts: 96
    That is tough. I have 4 kids ages 10,8,5,4. Although I do not have any children with issues like yours I do struggle. I am a SAHM and somedays it seems like I'm just going to snap. I love my kids but I also rarely get a break. Your job like mine is 24/7. I wish I had advice for you. I guess I could say that when you feel down take a break for yourself. Do something nice for you. And remember that God will only give you what you can handle. It will be tough now but someday your son will grow up to be a wonderful well rounded adult who has learned how to deal with his problem because he has a mother who loves and cares for him. So keep your spirits up and lean on your friends and loved ones for support. Those who love you will give you that shoulder to cry on or warm words of encouragement that you need.
  • ☆ShawnsMom08☆
    ☆ShawnsMom08☆ Posts: 74 Member
    this is pretty vague. What is the child doing? Young children will act out when confused and/or frustrated. It sounds to me like he needs a psychologist. Both of you just need to learn coping behavior. Perhaps he's upset about you splitting with his father? Some (many) children do not like big changes - like moving & stuff - and they will act out. Young children act out because they don't KNOW what they're feeling or have the words or ability to express.
    When he is calm, let him draw or give him legos and perhaps he will indicate what's bothering him. And call a behaviorist/psychologist - IF it is troubled behavior, you want to get a handle on that ASAP

    His dad and I are friends. They talk on the phone all the time. I have never said a bad thing about his father and I never will. We are parents together, forever. Symptoms: Sudden outbursts, euphoria, is more talkative than usual, irritability or hostility when demands are not met, decreased need for sleep without daytime fatigue, excessive involvement in pleasurable but risky activities. I have lived with someone bipolor. I know what I am talking about. I just want coping tips for a three year old.
  • expressbug
    expressbug Posts: 100
    Hi,

    My son just turn 7 years old, he has been recently diagnosed with Severe ADHD and ODD (Oppisitional Defiance Disorder) I have done alot of of reasearch, and at 2 1/2 that is still pretty young to be diagnosed with anything. Most good doctors wont put a psychological label on a child till about age 4-6.

    Some days are very hard and some not so much. However, my child is on medication that help him alot!!! Throughout kindergarten and 1st grade he had been suspended over 20 times each year due to impulsivity, anger, violence. After much testing through the school system and by his doctor we had a diagnosis. He is now in a "special ed" program at school for behavior and gets the special help he needs but everyday is hard for him. On top of all of that he has sensory processing issues too. He has had his IQ tested and is genius level for his age. (He thinks he is an adult and has conversations like he is one).

    On the other hand he is sweet, smart, likable and extremely funny!!!

    The one thing I can say is what ever the problem be consistant with disipline and the child will respond. When I say consistant, what I mean is, if you use "time out" make it the same place for the same amount of time for everything that is inappropriate just don't pick and choose.

    I hope that helps.
  • FabCheeky
    FabCheeky Posts: 311
    I have a son with Autism. We've always thought that it was more severe than it really was, because we lived with undiagnosed food allergies and intolerances. After switching to a Paleo style diet (meat, eggs, nuts, fish, extra virgin coconut oil, extra virgin olive oil, safe spices, veggies, and fruit that is bought as single ingredient items), we now know that he does NOT have any behavioral problems (such as meltdowns, self harm issues, etc) or many of his previous sensory processing issues. He still has Autism----social skills that are below age level, difficulty with understanding theory of mind, etc. BUT our lives are completely different. He's off of the Risperidone that he took for over 5 years...and is completely unmedicated. He sleeps through the night (when at 2, he would only sleep for 20 minutes a day) and has normal bowels (which went bad at 10 months old). We didn't make the full switch until January 16, 2011. I wish that we had known about these issues sooner, because we've tried every therapy under the sun to help him. It was only after we gave up a little and decided to try to help him lose weight (we thought that he was pretty overweight from the risperidone) that we found a different kid. He plays outside now----PLAYS! (Not just stimming until he has a meltdown to go back in) He has lost 33 pounds! 33 pounds on an 11 year old kid...With no forced exercise. I used to make him walk the track with me to try to help him lose weight, and it was a losing battle. Now, he plays and eats and is HEALTHY. No more weird rashes. No more weird bowels. No more weird sleep cycles. No more meltdowns. His Risperidone fog is leaving a little more by the day, and his social skill have improved 3 full years in 7 months. That's 3 years of progress we didn't get in ANY therapy program that he had been in since 2.

    Good luck on your journey.
    I'm praying that you find the answers to help your son most completely.
    If you want to know more about the Paleo diet, there are a ton of great websites and books.
  • tagrady
    tagrady Posts: 172 Member
    I know how you feel, and i'm in about the same situation. Your not really sure is everything is OK, and you don't want to be too quick to judge, but then again your gut is telling you something different.

    I haven't started to think about specialists or therapy yet, i'm holding off until school age so that I can re-evaluate this with teachers that know what is typical 5 year old behavior and what isn't. I'm trying to do anything in my power to get control of the situation, so that when he does go to school, i'll have a better understanding of what sets him off, what he can't eat, etc.

    1. I took him off all artificial colors, red #40, yellow #30 etc, that made a big difference.
    2. NO high fructose corn syrup or un-needed sugar, they say sugar doesn't get kids hyper, that's BS, you should see my son.
    3. Very strict with a schedule. I try to keep his day/routine as consistant as possible & give warning before he's about to do something. 10 mins till bath, 5 mins till bath, etc. This prepares him and there is less fights.
    4. Talk about why he is angry, and what he could do next time. This is also helpful WAY after the fact when we lie down for snuggles at night. We talk about why he went in time out today & "pretend re-inact" the situation so we can show how today should have gone down.

    The fact that you are trying to get ahead of the situation, before it becomes a problem shows how good of a mom you are. Crappy mom's don't care that their children act out, they don't care about talking to them about why they are angry....they just yell a them. I think you should be proud of how caring of a mom you are, and with time, you'll see a path to follow. I'd use this next year to really note or log the behaviors and what caused them, so that you learn his triggers before school.

    (((HUGS))) you're a great mom so remember that when it gets tough!
  • _Khaleesi_
    _Khaleesi_ Posts: 877 Member
    Sorry If this is repetition, I havent read every post.

    A child (especially one that isn't even 5) cannot be diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I believe it is one of the mental health disorders that cannot officially be diagnoses until the child has stopped developing (which the DSM classifies as 18 years old). It's the same with schizophrenia. Doctors may, in VERY serious cases of the above, classify the child as prodromal.

    Have your son looked at by a child psychiatrist (not psychologist). I wouldn't jump to conclusions yet, especially because at his age communication is HARD. Mood swings, sudden onset of anger, etc could be frustration with his inability to explain himself. It's hard for some children.

    Best of luck. Please set up a specialist appointment as soon as you can. Early intervention is huge in these situations.
This discussion has been closed.

Categories