Devastating News sabotages diet help

I'm sorry that you've had to go through that in your childhood. Can't have been easy and then to have your beliefs confirmed has clearly knocked you hard. Obviously I can't talk from experience but what I would like to say is that your adopted parents have already impacted your life so profoundly, why let them control one of the things that you can completely take charge of (i.e. what you eat and in more general terms, living a healthy - and happy - life). What happened has happened, it's in the past and you can't change it. However, don't let that become an easy excuse to fall into bad habits and let your weight balloon. Take back control.

So sorry. I have a super obsessive mind and have seen therapists about it. Is it at all possible that you have been so consumed by this fear that you weren’t loved that you pressed them over and over again on it until they kind of just cracked and admitted something that maybe isn’t FULLY accurate? I only ask because I have projected my deepest anxieties into people in a way that I created what I was afraid of. Hugs. Keep talking it out with a pro!

One thing that counting calories has given me is control. When my mind spins with worry or obsessive thinking, I cannot control it. I cannot control how people respond to me during the day or whether certain people do what I expect of them. However, I can control my health. It brings me back to earth a bit. Good luck!

I think the main thing to try to keep in perspective is that you are not a less worthy person. Your parents are objectively horrible people. Yes, it is normal to have a different type of bond to each of your children to some extent, but to love one of them less and treat them as less for any reason is deplorable.

But the real family you have are the people who love and value you, whether they are blood or friends or whatever. Surround yourself with the people who make you feel like your best self and empty out your big bag of flying rats' patooties for anyone who treats you like garbage. When you have none to give you will feel a lot better.

My dad wasn't always the nicest person when I was a kid and he has often made me feel belittled and disrespected. I will always love him but I haven't cared what he thinks of me in years. I can observe the difference in the way he affects me vs how he affects my siblings who still give a flying rat patootie what he thinks. I am immune to his judgement and it has made me a more secure person.

Every time you catch yourself worrying about it, think of time when they made you feel bad and ask yourself if it is worth your energy to care. I think you'll find that it isn't. Then take a deep breath, stretch your chest and abdomen out to release the worry knot, and move on with your day. I don't know if this method will work for everyone, but it does wonders for me.

Once you have unburdened your mind, focus in on a specific change you want to make. Maybe trying to work in more vegetables or getting in some exercise, but whatever it is, don't overburden yourself with it either. Just do whatever little thing makes you feel like you're making forward progress. Then compound the changes to create forward progress. Remember that weight loss isn't a linear downward slope. A journey is a slow meandering process.

I am so sorry this has happened to you. You should think of it as, at least I was adopted and not left without parents at all. Many never have a family. Don't let them have any hold on your eating or self worth. God loved you before you were ever born. Think positive things, do things to help others. Do positive things for yourself. Take walks, put healthy things in your house and body. I pray you are doing better after counseling. Tell yourself, you are worthy of love and carry on. You can do it.