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MyFitnessPal Community

Scared of the Gym

TheDulfin

I would like to start with lifting weights and Bulking, I have the diet and the programm (reddit r/fitness) but the one thing that is keeping me from starting is going to the gym. I've struggled with social anxiety my whole life. Therapy helped me alot but it is still a long way to go. It wouldn't matter if the people in the gym don't know me but the only avaible gym for me is the one of my school, that means there will be people who know me and are judging me. Do some of you have the same problem and how are you dealing with it? I would like to hear your experiences!

Replies

jdog022

I think the most important thing to know is that people at the gym are usually focused on themselves. If any are spending time judging you then they have their own confidence issues and aren’t worth worrying over

doubleap77

TheDulfin wrote: »

I would like to start with lifting weights and Bulking, I have the diet and the programm (reddit r/fitness) but the one thing that is keeping me from starting is going to the gym. I've struggled with social anxiety my whole life. Therapy helped me alot but it is still a long way to go. It wouldn't matter if the people in the gym don't know me but the only avaible gym for me is the one of my school, that means there will be people who know me and are judging me. Do some of you have the same problem and how are you dealing with it? I would like to hear your experiences!

First, in bold above, please understand that a vast majority of people are not judging you. In fact, many of those same people would be happy to help you, especially when you are just starting. Otherwise, many people go to the gym with a focus on their own workouts, not yours.

That being said, I know where you are coming from. It took years of putting myself in social situations before I got comfortable with myself and others.

I might suggest:

1) Start small. Overcoming social anxiety means putting yourself out there and interacting with new people. Make a small goal to say hello to someone. If that works well, try making small talk with a cashier or someone. Easy steps will build on one another.

2) Go to the gym with a friend, if you can. Even if you end up performing different workouts, at least they can help be a buffer and an ice breaker to get you through the door.

3) Understand and own that you want to do this for you. There is no shame in bettering yourself. You are proud to go into the gym and work hard. It doesn’t matter where you start, everyone has to start somewhere. (Shoot, I tore my quad the first time I squatted with an unladen bar. I couldn’t even bench the bar!)

Trust in yourself. Realize that almost everyone else has their own lives to lead. And do what is best for you.

Mezzie1024

Most people at the gym are focused on their own workouts. When I find myself watching others at the gym, I usually do so to see if they’re doing something I’d like to try or if there’s something in their form (good or bad) that can help me perfect my form. It really all goes back to me. In normal life, I’m not a narcissist, but at the gym? Totally.

The one tip I have to get past your anxiety would be for you to bring a buddy at least the first couple times, if possible. That can ease your transition into the gym being a comfortable place for you.

If that isn’t an option, just keep your headphones on and avoid eye contact. After a few sessions, you’ll get comfortable. You just have to do it.

aokoye

Yep I've definitely been there, though my social anxiety isn't the worst of my issues. While I don't really enjoy the weight room for various reasons (most related to just not enjoying lifting), what's really has helped my anxiety in that regard is a. familiarizing myself with the equipment that I'm going to use and b. just going - exposure. I'm sure you're aware, but exposure is probably the main way you'll manage to work through this. It'll suck while you're doing it, but you have to try to persevere and keep going.

snowflake954

So many people post about this. EVERYONE in the gym had a day 1. Just keep repeating this to yourself. Everyone sooner or later does embarrassing things at the gym. There are funny threads with these stories. You just have to get past the hump and it'll all get easier. Go just to look around quick.

Buff_Man

Day one or One day?

Tic78

You will probably find excercise will help you. It will certainly make you feel better about yourself.

As others have said generally people are concentrating on themselves but why not put some headphones on, that way you don’t need to interact with people if you don’t feel upto it.

You can do this 💪

talkinghead86

jdog022 wrote: »

I think the most important thing to know is that people at the gym are usually focused on themselves. If any are spending time judging you then they have their own confidence issues and aren’t worth worrying over

many are interested in finding a sex buddy as well....

aokoye

talkinghead86 wrote: »

jdog022 wrote: »

I think the most important thing to know is that people at the gym are usually focused on themselves. If any are spending time judging you then they have their own confidence issues and aren’t worth worrying over

many are interested in finding a sex buddy as well....

And this is just one reason why some people don't want to go to the gym.

jdog022

talkinghead86 wrote: »

jdog022 wrote: »

I think the most important thing to know is that people at the gym are usually focused on themselves. If any are spending time judging you then they have their own confidence issues and aren’t worth worrying over

many are interested in finding a sex buddy as well....

Lol what kinda gyms you going to man.

manowarrule2003

If you can..... Get a home bench and weightset. You dont have to go to a gym

jennifer_417

Just think about it this way: Everyone who will judge you for being a noob (like we all start out as) will come to respect you when they see your results!

80sSynthwave

The psychological term is "imaginary audience" and quite normal for young people. Just remember that most everyone else your age feels the same way.

Larissa_NY

Here, do this:*

1. Find something in your home that weighs about half again as much as you do - so if you weigh 200 lbs, find something that weighs 300.
2. Lift that thing up. Put it down. Lift it up. Put it down. Do it again three more times.
3. Find something that weighs about as much as you do. Put it on your back.
4. Sit down. Stand up. Do that four more times.
5. Wait, you're not done. You still have two more sets of five.
6. Report back on how much energy you have left to care what anyone else is doing in the weight room, or what anyone else thinks of what you're doing in the weight room. If you still have enough energy left to judge anyone, find something heavier.

People who don't lift don't realize this, but lifting is really goddamn hard and tiring work. By the time I'm done with my work sets on the deadlift I wouldn't care if Chris Hemsworth was marching past me buck naked leading the USC Marching Band in a rousing cover of "Tubthumping." I would want to care, but there would just not be enough glucose available for my brain.

Other than that - the gym is like the grocery store. When you see people you know, they're just as desperate to avoid you as you are to avoid them. Pay attention to your workout and you won't even realize they're there. Once you're in the gym, social anxiety is God's way of telling you to put more weight on the bar.

*do not actually do this.

fitom80

@TheDulfin why not to try it at home? start with own weight add some basic equipment each month. I've thought I wont be motivated when training at home. Mistake. I have more time, more concentration, dont have to be frustrated for waiting for an equipment... And you dont need much equipment even on more advanced level.

drebmc

Fortunately we have a small gym in the complex I live,literally 20 steps from my apartment. I only go in when it's empty. Do my workout routine and pray that no one else comes in while I'm there.

Evamutt

I'm sure there's many others at the gym who feel as you do