Scared of the Gym

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I would like to start with lifting weights and Bulking, I have the diet and the programm (reddit r/fitness) but the one thing that is keeping me from starting is going to the gym. I've struggled with social anxiety my whole life. Therapy helped me alot but it is still a long way to go. It wouldn't matter if the people in the gym don't know me but the only avaible gym for me is the one of my school, that means there will be people who know me and are judging me. Do some of you have the same problem and how are you dealing with it? I would like to hear your experiences!

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  • Mezzie1024
    Mezzie1024 Posts: 380 Member
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    Most people at the gym are focused on their own workouts. When I find myself watching others at the gym, I usually do so to see if they’re doing something I’d like to try or if there’s something in their form (good or bad) that can help me perfect my form. It really all goes back to me. In normal life, I’m not a narcissist, but at the gym? Totally.

    The one tip I have to get past your anxiety would be for you to bring a buddy at least the first couple times, if possible. That can ease your transition into the gym being a comfortable place for you.

    If that isn’t an option, just keep your headphones on and avoid eye contact. After a few sessions, you’ll get comfortable. You just have to do it. :)

  • Theoldguy1
    Theoldguy1 Posts: 2,454 Member
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    TheDulfin wrote: »
    I would like to start with lifting weights and Bulking, I have the diet and the programm (reddit r/fitness) but the one thing that is keeping me from starting is going to the gym. I've struggled with social anxiety my whole life. Therapy helped me alot but it is still a long way to go. It wouldn't matter if the people in the gym don't know me but the only avaible gym for me is the one of my school, that means there will be people who know me and are judging me. Do some of you have the same problem and how are you dealing with it? I would like to hear your experiences!

    As others have said, most people don't care what others are doing at the gym.

    As a suggestion, go to the gym and walk on the treadmill. Many people do this and it is pretty non-threatening. As you get more comfortable in the environment, try some of the weight machines and progress from there.

    Best of luck
  • aokoye
    aokoye Posts: 3,495 Member
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    Yep I've definitely been there, though my social anxiety isn't the worst of my issues. While I don't really enjoy the weight room for various reasons (most related to just not enjoying lifting), what's really has helped my anxiety in that regard is a. familiarizing myself with the equipment that I'm going to use and b. just going - exposure. I'm sure you're aware, but exposure is probably the main way you'll manage to work through this. It'll suck while you're doing it, but you have to try to persevere and keep going.
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,400 Member
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    So many people post about this. EVERYONE in the gym had a day 1. Just keep repeating this to yourself. Everyone sooner or later does embarrassing things at the gym. There are funny threads with these stories. You just have to get past the hump and it'll all get easier. Go just to look around quick.
  • Buff_Man
    Buff_Man Posts: 622 Member
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    Day one or One day?
  • Tic78
    Tic78 Posts: 232 Member
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    You will probably find excercise will help you. It will certainly make you feel better about yourself.

    As others have said generally people are concentrating on themselves but why not put some headphones on, that way you don’t need to interact with people if you don’t feel upto it.

    You can do this 💪
  • aokoye
    aokoye Posts: 3,495 Member
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    jdog022 wrote: »
    I think the most important thing to know is that people at the gym are usually focused on themselves. If any are spending time judging you then they have their own confidence issues and aren’t worth worrying over

    many are interested in finding a sex buddy as well....

    And this is just one reason why some people don't want to go to the gym.
  • jdog022
    jdog022 Posts: 693 Member
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    jdog022 wrote: »
    I think the most important thing to know is that people at the gym are usually focused on themselves. If any are spending time judging you then they have their own confidence issues and aren’t worth worrying over

    many are interested in finding a sex buddy as well....

    Lol what kinda gyms you going to man.
  • manowarrule2003
    manowarrule2003 Posts: 118 Member
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    If you can..... Get a home bench and weightset. You dont have to go to a gym
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
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    Just think about it this way: Everyone who will judge you for being a noob (like we all start out as) will come to respect you when they see your results!
  • 80sSynthwave
    80sSynthwave Posts: 25 Member
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    The psychological term is "imaginary audience" and quite normal for young people. Just remember that most everyone else your age feels the same way.
  • Larissa_NY
    Larissa_NY Posts: 495 Member
    edited April 2019
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    Here, do this:*

    1. Find something in your home that weighs about half again as much as you do - so if you weigh 200 lbs, find something that weighs 300.
    2. Lift that thing up. Put it down. Lift it up. Put it down. Do it again three more times.
    3. Find something that weighs about as much as you do. Put it on your back.
    4. Sit down. Stand up. Do that four more times.
    5. Wait, you're not done. You still have two more sets of five.
    6. Report back on how much energy you have left to care what anyone else is doing in the weight room, or what anyone else thinks of what you're doing in the weight room. If you still have enough energy left to judge anyone, find something heavier.

    People who don't lift don't realize this, but lifting is really goddamn hard and tiring work. By the time I'm done with my work sets on the deadlift I wouldn't care if Chris Hemsworth was marching past me buck naked leading the USC Marching Band in a rousing cover of "Tubthumping." I would want to care, but there would just not be enough glucose available for my brain.

    Other than that - the gym is like the grocery store. When you see people you know, they're just as desperate to avoid you as you are to avoid them. Pay attention to your workout and you won't even realize they're there. Once you're in the gym, social anxiety is God's way of telling you to put more weight on the bar.



    *do not actually do this.
  • fitom80
    fitom80 Posts: 154 Member
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    @TheDulfin why not to try it at home? start with own weight add some basic equipment each month. I've thought I wont be motivated when training at home. Mistake. I have more time, more concentration, dont have to be frustrated for waiting for an equipment... And you dont need much equipment even on more advanced level.
  • drebmc
    drebmc Posts: 23 Member
    edited April 2019
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    Fortunately we have a small gym in the complex I live,literally 20 steps from my apartment. I only go in when it's empty. Do my workout routine and pray that no one else comes in while I'm there. :/
  • Evamutt
    Evamutt Posts: 2,312 Member
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    I'm sure there's many others at the gym who feel as you do