Frustration over work support

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I must admit, the last 4 days have been hard eating wise for me. The weekend was hot, in which case I never want to eat. Couple that with the fact that I was out of town made it a bit harder to eat anything healthy. Monday and Tuesday weren't much better as I gave in to my cravings. Yesterday and today have been better as I have put myself back on track with eating 5-6 meals per day.

I was walking back into the office when a co-worker, who I consider to be a good friend as well, looked at me and said "Are you STILL on that salad-y eating thing?" She herself has had lap-band surgery and knows the struggle to lose weight. I just smiled and said "Yes, I haven't done so well the last few days and am getting back into my good habits." We joked for another minute and while I was smiling on the outside, I felt hurt on the inside.

It doesn't make me want to give up, but I am tired of having to explain to people why I choose to eat the way I do, why I exercise the way I do. It's embarrassing enough to admit that I'm not happy at my current weight and with the way my body looks. It would be nice to have support and encouragement from friends at work.

Sorry....ranting....

Replies

  • tracielinn
    tracielinn Posts: 113 Member
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    ....and to top it all off...I posted in the wrong place. Sorry this should have been under motivation/support.

    tracielinn
  • luckyduck768
    luckyduck768 Posts: 40 Member
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    It can definitely be difficult when you don't have the proper support system! I know that you can do it. Surgery is difficult too, but you're taking the more challenging route! It's hard to ALWAYS stay focused especially when work is not being particularly supportive. Just remember, you always have your support system here! :)
  • dkmclean
    dkmclean Posts: 8 Member
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    Who are you losing weight for, you or your coworker? If it is for you, who cares what she thinks about your food choices. I was 230 pounds on Jan 19th and started a sugar control diet along with exercise, mostly cardio. I eat six meals a day, almost the same six meals EVERY day. I only change dinners and occassionally lunch on the weekend. I lost 50 lbs in four months and have kept it off. I am currently 178 lbs. My co-workers laugh when my Smartphone alarm goes off to remind me to eat and I don't care. I lost the weight and have kept it off for me, not them. Good luck.
  • sarahwebb81
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    I'm surprised that someone who has also struggled with her weight would make a comment like that. I know it's hard, but don't let it get you down. Don't feel embarrassed for making healthy choices... it's a good thing!

    I struggle with the same thing at work. Being in an office environment, someone is always bringing in cookies or donuts or bagels. It's hard to turn that stuff down, especially when people try to force it on you. I think some people may feel a little threatened when they see someone with good eating habits, and they may try to make themselves feel better by trying to get you to conform to their bad habits or by making hurtful comments. This probably isn't intended to be mean or hurtful... some people just don't think about it or understand what a struggle it is.

    Anyway, great job for getting back on track after your little speed bump! I know that's hard to do. Keep up the great work!
  • gennybunny1
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    You poor thing, don't worry about where you posted. Keep your chin up and keep going. I think people ask questions like that because they are insecure in themselves and it's a way to project their insecurities. Good luck. :)
  • SusanneWhittington
    SusanneWhittington Posts: 339 Member
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    I was tired of things like that too in the few last attempts of loosing weight, when people asked me if I am anorexic while on BMI and body fat % I was still in the obese sector. But I just filed it under, well I am living in a state where the majority thinks that being wide as high is a healthy looking body, go for it... I don't think so... Fact is also that the state I am living in has one of the lowest IQ rates, that still does not mean I will play dump just to fit in the average... So just see it from that side... Who is the most important person in your life and whose opinion guides the way your life is going? YOU!!!! So do what YOU think is best for YOU! And when your coworker thinks eating 5 lbs of raw meat is healthier than salad, well let her go for it! In the end you are the satisfied person who got to a healthier body on her own with good choices and sweat!
  • MlissaB
    MlissaB Posts: 16 Member
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    I get it at work and home... I stumbled this weekend because my nephew got married (husband was in the wedding party) so there was good food and wine and snacks all weekend. No one seems to get that it only takes a day or two of being "bad" to destroy all the good you've been working at.

    My husband isn't a big help, he doesn't choose to put forth the effort so it's easier for him to drag me down than to step up. I am weighing portions and reading labels and he is getting annoyed. I finally put him in his place and told him he didn't have to do it, but he had to choose between supporting me in my choice or shutting up!

    A lot of the ladies at work eat out 3-5 times a week. Almost all of them have gone through a weight loss journey at one point or another, but just don't seem to get it. I agree with some of the others that it may be that she sees you doing something she didn't have the strength to do! I just tell them no when they ask and am grateful that my desk was recently moved further away from the front office (I need to be closer to the production floor) so I can avoid all the "goodies" that get brought in.
  • Grokette
    Grokette Posts: 3,330 Member
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    I must admit, the last 4 days have been hard eating wise for me. The weekend was hot, in which case I never want to eat. Couple that with the fact that I was out of town made it a bit harder to eat anything healthy. Monday and Tuesday weren't much better as I gave in to my cravings. Yesterday and today have been better as I have put myself back on track with eating 5-6 meals per day.

    I was walking back into the office when a co-worker, who I consider to be a good friend as well, looked at me and said "Are you STILL on that salad-y eating thing?" She herself has had lap-band surgery and knows the struggle to lose weight. I just smiled and said "Yes, I haven't done so well the last few days and am getting back into my good habits." We joked for another minute and while I was smiling on the outside, I felt hurt on the inside.

    It doesn't make me want to give up, but I am tired of having to explain to people why I choose to eat the way I do, why I exercise the way I do. It's embarrassing enough to admit that I'm not happy at my current weight and with the way my body looks. It would be nice to have support and encouragement from friends at work.

    Sorry....ranting....

    Sorry your going through this, but you don't have to explain anything to anyone. You are accountable for YOUR health and well being and no one else is accountable for you or to you either.

    I am quick to tell someone to go to hell if they say anything about the way they eat................or depending on my mood, I may tell them what is wrong with their eating plan. Like the one lady I had to put in her place a couple of weeks ago.

    Don't worry about them, it could be jealousy that you are making changes to your lifestyle that they can't or just won't do.
  • Grokette
    Grokette Posts: 3,330 Member
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    I'm surprised that someone who has also struggled with her weight would make a comment like that. I know it's hard, but don't let it get you down. Don't feel embarrassed for making healthy choices... it's a good thing!

    I struggle with the same thing at work. Being in an office environment, someone is always bringing in cookies or donuts or bagels. It's hard to turn that stuff down, especially when people try to force it on you. I think some people may feel a little threatened when they see someone with good eating habits, and they may try to make themselves feel better by trying to get you to conform to their bad habits or by making hurtful comments. This probably isn't intended to be mean or hurtful... some people just don't think about it or understand what a struggle it is.

    Anyway, great job for getting back on track after your little speed bump! I know that's hard to do. Keep up the great work!

    I am not surprised................Most, but not all that get weight loss surgery fail to make the proper lifestyle changes and end up gaining the weight back.............
  • tracielinn
    tracielinn Posts: 113 Member
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    Thanks for everyone's responses! After I had done my ranting, I felt a little better. I think sometimes its just a need to get frustrations out. The group of girls that I typically eat lunch with are very supportive, often joking with me about how I make them look bad by eating my salads while they are eating burgers and fries.

    I know that I'm on this journey for me, not anyone else, and that I shouldn't care what others think. That is a hard habit for me to break. My boyfriend is very supportive and although he may pout a bit when I don't want any dessert, he is complimentary on the changes I'm making.

    Thanks again for everyone's support! This is why I keep coming back to MFP!

    Tracie
  • thamre
    thamre Posts: 642 Member
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    I totally understand where you are coming from. I have struggled for 1 1/2 years to lose the weight I have. My co-worker(and friend)had the gastric bypass surgery years ago. She is always claiming to be losing weight and nearing her goal, but yet I see her eat a half a bag of peanut butter m&m's (the big big bag) in one day, munch on potato chips as soon as she walks in the door and brings in lots of goodies around the holidays. It just makes me so mad...I work so hard and if I ate like her I would get nowhere! I guess I just have to remember that I have better eating habits than her and one day it will catch up with her.
  • ashlielinn
    ashlielinn Posts: 920
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    Amen! I'm tired of having to defend my HEALTHY habits! Shouldn't people be glad you're bettering yourself? 99% of the time, they're doing it because they're insecure about their own habits, and trying to bring you down with them! Good luck!