Is giving up strength training my best option?

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Replies

  • HoneyBadger302
    HoneyBadger302 Posts: 1,679 Member
    With your current composition, it's really hard to tell where you will end up. Stick to the diet, and stick to working out. When you lose the upper body weight, see where you are at. In my opinion, you are still carrying far too much excess weight (at least on the photo in this thread) to judge your body's natural shape as harshly as you are.

    I have a very - manly - shape (broad shoulders and carry my weight around my middle first), and not very curvy, but I actually love my body when I'm at my goal weight (where I was most of my adult life until the dreaded desk job and not accounting for my lowered activity). Sure, there were things I wanted to improve, but it wasn't a huge worry for me like my body's appearance is right now - but I know that if I keep up what I'm doing, when I get there, I'll be proud of my physical shape again. In the meantime, I'm enjoying the muscles I'm seeing and how strong and flexible I feel, and the improvements, while small and slow are also slowly increasing my overall confidence - which affects nearly every area of my life.

    Keep up the strength training, it really can make a difference. You may not get a bubble butt, but you might be surprised with how much you like what you end up with.

    In the meantime, do what ALL the other Instagram models do, and get really good at filters and photo editing and taking hundreds of pictures for that one shot you actually post ;) And I say this personally knowing a few of the "insta-models" and that is EXACTLY what they do - IRL they look NOTHING like the photos they actually allow on social media....
  • JanetReyna
    JanetReyna Posts: 291 Member
    But you think I look manly? I don’t know man sometimes I really just want to give up on everything. My midsection is covered in stretch marks and I’m only 24 years old. I die to look curvy, smaller waist, thicker thighs, bigger glutes, I lose hope every time I see myself in the mirror. It is depressing for me to feel bad and look this way. I don’t know the escape of this feeling. I just wish I could get the body I want!!!!
    With your current composition, it's really hard to tell where you will end up. Stick to the diet, and stick to working out. When you lose the upper body weight, see where you are at. In my opinion, you are still carrying far too much excess weight (at least on the photo in this thread) to judge your body's natural shape as harshly as you are.

    I have a very - manly - shape (broad shoulders and carry my weight around my middle first), and not very curvy, but I actually love my body when I'm at my goal weight (where I was most of my adult life until the dreaded desk job and not accounting for my lowered activity). Sure, there were things I wanted to improve, but it wasn't a huge worry for me like my body's appearance is right now - but I know that if I keep up what I'm doing, when I get there, I'll be proud of my physical shape again. In the meantime, I'm enjoying the muscles I'm seeing and how strong and flexible I feel, and the improvements, while small and slow are also slowly increasing my overall confidence - which affects nearly every area of my life.

    Keep up the strength training, it really can make a difference. You may not get a bubble butt, but you might be surprised with how much you like what you end up with.

    In the meantime, do what ALL the other Instagram models do, and get really good at filters and photo editing and taking hundreds of pictures for that one shot you actually post ;) And I say this personally knowing a few of the "insta-models" and that is EXACTLY what they do - IRL they look NOTHING like the photos they actually allow on social media....

  • JanetReyna
    JanetReyna Posts: 291 Member
    With your current composition, it's really hard to tell where you will end up. Stick to the diet, and stick to working out. When you lose the upper body weight, see where you are at. In my opinion, you are still carrying far too much excess weight (at least on the photo in this thread) to judge your body's natural shape as harshly as you are.

    I have a very - manly - shape (broad shoulders and carry my weight around my middle first), and not very curvy, but I actually love my body when I'm at my goal weight (where I was most of my adult life until the dreaded desk job and not accounting for my lowered activity). Sure, there were things I wanted to improve, but it wasn't a huge worry for me like my body's appearance is right now - but I know that if I keep up what I'm doing, when I get there, I'll be proud of my physical shape again. In the meantime, I'm enjoying the muscles I'm seeing and how strong and flexible I feel, and the improvements, while small and slow are also slowly increasing my overall confidence - which affects nearly every area of my life.

    Keep up the strength training, it really can make a difference. You may not get a bubble butt, but you might be surprised with how much you like what you end up with.

    In the meantime, do what ALL the other Instagram models do, and get really good at filters and photo editing and taking hundreds of pictures for that one shot you actually post ;) And I say this personally knowing a few of the "insta-models" and that is EXACTLY what they do - IRL they look NOTHING like the photos they actually allow on social media....

    I’m also in fear I’ll end up with a bunch of lose skin and just not curvy at all. AGH.
  • TrishSeren
    TrishSeren Posts: 587 Member
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    But you think I look manly? I don’t know man sometimes I really just want to give up on everything. My midsection is covered in stretch marks and I’m only 24 years old. I die to look curvy, smaller waist, thicker thighs, bigger glutes, I lose hope every time I see myself in the mirror. It is depressing for me to feel bad and look this way. I don’t know the escape of this feeling. I just wish I could get the body I want!!!!
    With your current composition, it's really hard to tell where you will end up. Stick to the diet, and stick to working out. When you lose the upper body weight, see where you are at. In my opinion, you are still carrying far too much excess weight (at least on the photo in this thread) to judge your body's natural shape as harshly as you are.

    I have a very - manly - shape (broad shoulders and carry my weight around my middle first), and not very curvy, but I actually love my body when I'm at my goal weight (where I was most of my adult life until the dreaded desk job and not accounting for my lowered activity). Sure, there were things I wanted to improve, but it wasn't a huge worry for me like my body's appearance is right now - but I know that if I keep up what I'm doing, when I get there, I'll be proud of my physical shape again. In the meantime, I'm enjoying the muscles I'm seeing and how strong and flexible I feel, and the improvements, while small and slow are also slowly increasing my overall confidence - which affects nearly every area of my life.

    Keep up the strength training, it really can make a difference. You may not get a bubble butt, but you might be surprised with how much you like what you end up with.

    In the meantime, do what ALL the other Instagram models do, and get really good at filters and photo editing and taking hundreds of pictures for that one shot you actually post ;) And I say this personally knowing a few of the "insta-models" and that is EXACTLY what they do - IRL they look NOTHING like the photos they actually allow on social media....

    No they said they think they look manly.


    I can tell by the way you speak that you are likely taking a lot of inspiration from Instagram fitness models. Stop following them, stop looking at them. Most of them are genetically blessed or have eating disorders, or have had surgery and simply lie about it. I can tell you right now you will NEVER look like them, BUT if you keep dieting and keep lifting you will look like the BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF.

    I used to HATE my legs, but now when I work out, I love how they look because whilst they are more muscly than the average girls' legs they still look good. Sure I'd love skinny tiny legs, but genetically it'll never happen for me. Once I saw how good they looked when I trained them, I accepted myself a lot more and stopped comparing.

    Don't give up, keep going, because soon you'll notice how good YOU look and stop comparing yourself to instagram models.
  • JanetReyna
    JanetReyna Posts: 291 Member
    Well yes I know some are genetically blessed but I don’t want to lose faith I can achieve a body similar like that. I want thicker thighs and glutes but sometimes I feel I alone won’t achieve it cause there’s so much information and it’s crazy! But my stomach is where I gain most of my fat.. I want to have a small waist so I want to try to waist train or wear shapeswer and just keep going to the gym. Girl my legs are skinny, I want them thick but damn I need to lift a lot.
    TrishSeren wrote: »
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    But you think I look manly? I don’t know man sometimes I really just want to give up on everything. My midsection is covered in stretch marks and I’m only 24 years old. I die to look curvy, smaller waist, thicker thighs, bigger glutes, I lose hope every time I see myself in the mirror. It is depressing for me to feel bad and look this way. I don’t know the escape of this feeling. I just wish I could get the body I want!!!!
    With your current composition, it's really hard to tell where you will end up. Stick to the diet, and stick to working out. When you lose the upper body weight, see where you are at. In my opinion, you are still carrying far too much excess weight (at least on the photo in this thread) to judge your body's natural shape as harshly as you are.

    I have a very - manly - shape (broad shoulders and carry my weight around my middle first), and not very curvy, but I actually love my body when I'm at my goal weight (where I was most of my adult life until the dreaded desk job and not accounting for my lowered activity). Sure, there were things I wanted to improve, but it wasn't a huge worry for me like my body's appearance is right now - but I know that if I keep up what I'm doing, when I get there, I'll be proud of my physical shape again. In the meantime, I'm enjoying the muscles I'm seeing and how strong and flexible I feel, and the improvements, while small and slow are also slowly increasing my overall confidence - which affects nearly every area of my life.

    Keep up the strength training, it really can make a difference. You may not get a bubble butt, but you might be surprised with how much you like what you end up with.

    In the meantime, do what ALL the other Instagram models do, and get really good at filters and photo editing and taking hundreds of pictures for that one shot you actually post ;) And I say this personally knowing a few of the "insta-models" and that is EXACTLY what they do - IRL they look NOTHING like the photos they actually allow on social media....

    No they said they think they look manly.


    I can tell by the way you speak that you are likely taking a lot of inspiration from Instagram fitness models. Stop following them, stop looking at them. Most of them are genetically blessed or have eating disorders, or have had surgery and simply lie about it. I can tell you right now you will NEVER look like them, BUT if you keep dieting and keep lifting you will look like the BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF.

    I used to HATE my legs, but now when I work out, I love how they look because whilst they are more muscly than the average girls' legs they still look good. Sure I'd love skinny tiny legs, but genetically it'll never happen for me. Once I saw how good they looked when I trained them, I accepted myself a lot more and stopped comparing.

    Don't give up, keep going, because soon you'll notice how good YOU look and stop comparing yourself to instagram models.

  • JanetReyna
    JanetReyna Posts: 291 Member
    I’m alone on my journey and it’s stressful because I don’t know what the heck to do. By seeing my body shape you think I can get a thicker lower body and a smaller upper body by counting calories and following Strong Curves? I’m willing to put the work in, I just want some motivation. I don’t want to lose my glutes because I’ll be skinny but with no curves. I want them bigger and obviously I want to get thicker. Please tell me I have hope for my goals :(
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    I think until you lose the weight you can not tell what your butt and hips will be like. Because you are carrying most of your weight around your middle it is making your hips and butt look smaller. But once the weight has gone you may find you look more in proportion and your butt and hips are not as small as you think they will be.

    Why give up now? What have you got to lose by continuing with the lifting?

    Hope you dont mind I copied your picture over so the other contributors in this thread can have a better idea of the issue you are concerned about.

    Dont give up you will only regret it in the future.

    a0f4nrm9x9aj.png

    THANK YOU!
    I don’t mind at all, I thank you for putting it there, but can you see I don’t have curves or a defined waist. What do you think I should do with all the upper body fat if it’s too much? I am following Strong Curves but should I waist train?

    Okay, you posted the first post after only TWO MONTHS of strength training? And you’re worried that you don’t have enough waist definition, while you are clearly at or near an obese BMI, but you won’t count calories because you “stress too much.”

    No, you shouldn’t waist train. You should cut calories. Get the heck over being “too stressed” to count calories. You know what’s really stressful? Doing nonsense that doesn’t work and complaining about not seeing results. When you do what works and it starts working, your stress will magically melt away.

    In one year you can transform your body completely. You are lucky, you have a lot of belly fat at the moment, and fat is easy to get rid of by eating at a deficit while maintaining muscle through strength training.

    What are you doing right now that’s a higher priority? If the way your body looks bothers you, then change it. If you don’t want to change it, that’s fine too. But for pity’s sake stop whining about how you aren’t willing to put the work in. Do you want it enough to do the work or don’t you? Either one is fine! But nothing is going to change if you aren’t willing to cut calories.

    See you in a year.

  • JanetReyna
    JanetReyna Posts: 291 Member
    I don’t think my booty is small though lol.. it looks a bit smaller there because of the cloth but it’s lifted upi promise :( and omg yes! That’s what I want I want to shrink my torso so my glutes look bigger.
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    I’m alone on my journey and it’s stressful because I don’t know what the heck to do. By seeing my body shape you think I can get a thicker lower body and a smaller upper body by counting calories and following Strong Curves? I’m willing to put the work in, I just want some motivation. I don’t want to lose my glutes because I’ll be skinny but with no curves. I want them bigger and obviously I want to get thicker. Please tell me I have hope for my goals :(
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    I think until you lose the weight you can not tell what your butt and hips will be like. Because you are carrying most of your weight around your middle it is making your hips and butt look smaller. But once the weight has gone you may find you look more in proportion and your butt and hips are not as small as you think they will be.

    Why give up now? What have you got to lose by continuing with the lifting?

    Hope you dont mind I copied your picture over so the other contributors in this thread can have a better idea of the issue you are concerned about.

    Dont give up you will only regret it in the future.

    a0f4nrm9x9aj.png

    THANK YOU!
    I don’t mind at all, I thank you for putting it there, but can you see I don’t have curves or a defined waist. What do you think I should do with all the upper body fat if it’s too much? I am following Strong Curves but should I waist train?

    Okay, you posted the first post after only TWO MONTHS of strength training? And you’re worried that you don’t have enough waist definition, while you are clearly at or near an obese BMI, but you won’t count calories because you “stress too much.”

    No, you shouldn’t waist train. You should cut calories. Get the heck over being “too stressed” to count calories. You know what’s really stressful? Doing nonsense that doesn’t work and complaining about not seeing results. When you do what works and it starts working, your stress will magically melt away.

    In one year you can transform your body completely. You are lucky, you have a lot of belly fat at the moment, and fat is easy to get rid of by eating at a deficit while maintaining muscle through strength training.

    What are you doing right now that’s a higher priority? If the way your body looks bothers you, then change it. If you don’t want to change it, that’s fine too. But for pity’s sake stop whining about how you aren’t willing to put the work in. Do you want it enough to do the work or don’t you? Either one is fine! But nothing is going to change if you aren’t willing to cut calories.

    See you in a year.

    You absolutely and completely have hope to reach your goals.

    The reason your booty is small right now is that it’s not where you genetically tend to store fat. That means when you lose fat, you are not going to lose much booty. Instead, you will lose the fat from around your torso. If you continue to build muscle, you can easily increase the size of your rear while shrinking your torso.

    Look, yesterday was my 26th anniversary, and my husband and I went to see “Once upon a time in Hollywood,” and when we got out my husband said to me that the changes I made in my body since joining MFP were comparable to if he one day decided he wanted to be built like Brad Pitt so he started going to the gym, and boom, Brad Pitt. My husband is a sweetheart and possibly exaggerating but it’s not far from the truth, I went from having a huge swollen belly that hung out like I was pregnant to looking fit and shapely. Most of the work was done in the first year, although it’s continuing to improve. I lost 125 lbs overall. You can do anything you set out to do, and unlike me, you have the advantage of being young, so your skin has a much better chance of snapping back into shape.

    What are your stats, height and weight? Have you said yet and I missed it? Start by setting a goal of being at the top of healthy BMI for your height, input your stats into MFP and get a calorie goal. Then keep working out. If you hate strong curves you can find something you enjoy more. But you can definitely get yourself a body that will be strong and healthy and beautiful.

  • TrishSeren
    TrishSeren Posts: 587 Member
    Go and see a personal trainer who can give you advice in person because you've received a lot of the same GOOD advice on here but you keep asking the same questions over and over.

    Count calories, weight train (focusing on the lower body to help build leg and glute muscle) and see what happens. But it'll take over a year, I can tell you that now.
  • 777Gemma888
    777Gemma888 Posts: 9,580 Member
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    I don’t think my booty is small though lol.. it looks a bit smaller there because of the cloth but it’s lifted upi promise :( and omg yes! That’s what I want I want to shrink my torso so my glutes look bigger.
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    I’m alone on my journey and it’s stressful because I don’t know what the heck to do. By seeing my body shape you think I can get a thicker lower body and a smaller upper body by counting calories and following Strong Curves? I’m willing to put the work in, I just want some motivation. I don’t want to lose my glutes because I’ll be skinny but with no curves. I want them bigger and obviously I want to get thicker. Please tell me I have hope for my goals :(
    JanetReyna wrote: »
    I think until you lose the weight you can not tell what your butt and hips will be like. Because you are carrying most of your weight around your middle it is making your hips and butt look smaller. But once the weight has gone you may find you look more in proportion and your butt and hips are not as small as you think they will be.

    Why give up now? What have you got to lose by continuing with the lifting?

    Hope you dont mind I copied your picture over so the other contributors in this thread can have a better idea of the issue you are concerned about.

    Dont give up you will only regret it in the future.

    a0f4nrm9x9aj.png

    THANK YOU!
    I don’t mind at all, I thank you for putting it there, but can you see I don’t have curves or a defined waist. What do you think I should do with all the upper body fat if it’s too much? I am following Strong Curves but should I waist train?

    Okay, you posted the first post after only TWO MONTHS of strength training? And you’re worried that you don’t have enough waist definition, while you are clearly at or near an obese BMI, but you won’t count calories because you “stress too much.”

    No, you shouldn’t waist train. You should cut calories. Get the heck over being “too stressed” to count calories. You know what’s really stressful? Doing nonsense that doesn’t work and complaining about not seeing results. When you do what works and it starts working, your stress will magically melt away.

    In one year you can transform your body completely. You are lucky, you have a lot of belly fat at the moment, and fat is easy to get rid of by eating at a deficit while maintaining muscle through strength training.

    What are you doing right now that’s a higher priority? If the way your body looks bothers you, then change it. If you don’t want to change it, that’s fine too. But for pity’s sake stop whining about how you aren’t willing to put the work in. Do you want it enough to do the work or don’t you? Either one is fine! But nothing is going to change if you aren’t willing to cut calories.

    See you in a year.

    You absolutely and completely have hope to reach your goals.

    The reason your booty is small right now is that it’s not where you genetically tend to store fat. That means when you lose fat, you are not going to lose much booty. Instead, you will lose the fat from around your torso. If you continue to build muscle, you can easily increase the size of your rear while shrinking your torso.

    Look, yesterday was my 26th anniversary, and my husband and I went to see “Once upon a time in Hollywood,” and when we got out my husband said to me that the changes I made in my body since joining MFP were comparable to if he one day decided he wanted to be built like Brad Pitt so he started going to the gym, and boom, Brad Pitt. My husband is a sweetheart and possibly exaggerating but it’s not far from the truth, I went from having a huge swollen belly that hung out like I was pregnant to looking fit and shapely. Most of the work was done in the first year, although it’s continuing to improve. I lost 125 lbs overall. You can do anything you set out to do, and unlike me, you have the advantage of being young, so your skin has a much better chance of snapping back into shape.

    What are your stats, height and weight? Have you said yet and I missed it? Start by setting a goal of being at the top of healthy BMI for your height, input your stats into MFP and get a calorie goal. Then keep working out. If you hate strong curves you can find something you enjoy more. But you can definitely get yourself a body that will be strong and healthy and beautiful.

    Your buttocks aren't small. Your upper and lower waist and back are still carrying a lot of excess fat, which may lead you to believe that you need more volume there. You may also have hip dips. You need to have more patience. Tightening up your logging and calories might be something you could also look into.

    As previously stated, you are a pretty woman. If two months is too long for you, is surgery an option you can afford? If not, then stay the course.
  • Dorchi22
    Dorchi22 Posts: 57 Member
    Two months is definitely not nearly enough to start making assumptions about your body. There are so many exercise videos that focus on the butt and the legs, surely you can follow them and with persistence there will be results.

    You can't possibly be alone in this journey because we're all here, counting calories and succeeding magnificently. Why? Because we want to have the best bodies that we can. Buy a small electronic measuring food scale. That's a life saver. Don't over-complicate things with weird choices of food that you can't find in the database (not saying you're doing it), hold yourself accountable and LOG. EVERY. SINGLE. THING!

    There really isn't anything more complicated to it than that. IF you go over the limit, that's fine, at least you'll have an indication of how much you're eating. You'll have better days, you'll have days when you'll feel low on yourself. If you find it triggering, don't weigh yourself every day, and focus on building muscles.

    And as a last bit of advice, I urge you to find a good psychologist to help you with your body image, because the things you're writing are a bit worrying. At such a young age, you're much too young to believe that you don't look feminine, and that your only option is to have a very dangerous surgery.