Help me please! Support and motivation needed

Am nearly 36 and have been struggling to be consistent in my health and fitness goals. Was doing really well about 7 yrs ago (lost nearly 25kg and was the fittest of been in ages!) but lost all motivation after my mum passed away suddenly and have struggled to get back on track since (putting on all the weight I’d lost plus more) I’ve been avoiding logging my food/water- and have been in real denial about the quality and quantity of food I’ve been eating...
I’ve enjoyed the low GI food plan in the past- would love any meal ideas! And enjoy triathlon training (although I’m overweight and unfit, i still manage to complete 1-2 short course triathlons per year)
I really enjoy road cycling and mountain bike riding, want to be a better swimmer and would love to be able to do chin ups! Haha!
Feel free to add me- would love some friendly motivation! Have my brother’s wedding in Fiji in August 2020 that I’d love to feel better for! Xxx

Replies

  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,538 Member
    PunchyHays wrote: »
    I’ve been avoiding logging my food/water- and have been in real denial about the quality and quantity of food I’ve been eating...

    Well? Some people come here and its pretty clear that they really don’t know what to do. I mean big picture. Don’t know how to go about calorie counting or the value of a food diary. That doesn’t seem to be you. Maybe its time to go look at yourself in the mirror and have a talk.

    Maybe try this, it helped me- take a piece of paper, line down the middle. One side- the reasons you want to lose weight. Other side- reasons you don’t. Think it over. Sleep on it. Get everything down you can think of. Nothing is too silly. Now look at the lists. Are there any deals you can make with yourself that might get you moving? Resist the temptation to think that the way to deal with your own resistance (your don’ts) is to just get up a head of steam and run them into the ditch. You have reasons you don’t want to act on this or you would do it. Try to find a way that both sides can get some of what they want.

    Last thought- if you’re looking for weight loss while pursuing a high level of fitness, you likely need pretty specific nutrition. I had to face the fact that my gym “workouts” using various cardio machines really didn’t amount to much more than recreation. I just wasn’t going to put in more time. So I just gave up the idea of eating back exercise calories. Doesn’t sound like you can go that path. Just suggesting it looks like you’re in for some trial and error. Keep tinkering with the numbers until you can find something you can live with long term. The best plan is one that we will actually follow. Good luck.
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,333 Member
    The only thing I have to say is the food you eat and drinking water can really change how you feel so fast. The aspect MFP I don't like, is people eat at a deficit...eating pop tarts...cokes.anything they want as long as it fits within the calorie budget. But if a person is not eating vegetables, lean meats, fruits..and drinking water.. you they end up feeling like crap, especially if they exercise extreme at the same time. It leads to burnout.. binging and never getting anywhere.

    Focus on healthy eating..drink your water.. get feeling great and move on from there.
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
    Identify what the easiest positive step you could make today and do that. Do not worry that it won't be a significant change. If you are not ready to log then don't log. Can you eat a couple of extra servings of fruits and/or vegetables today? Can you avoid drinking excess calories? Can you replace one meal item with something less caloric? Just pick something and stick to that for a couple of days. Now you don't need a lot of motivation or willpower to start. You just need a slight nudge in the right direction.

    Change will often seem easier if you just break the ice with a small tap first. You can then add more as you feel like it or jump in.
  • girlwithcurls2
    girlwithcurls2 Posts: 2,282 Member
    NovusDies wrote: »
    Identify what the easiest positive step you could make today and do that. Do not worry that it won't be a significant change. If you are not ready to log then don't log. Can you eat a couple of extra servings of fruits and/or vegetables today? Can you avoid drinking excess calories? Can you replace one meal item with something less caloric? Just pick something and stick to that for a couple of days. Now you don't need a lot of motivation or willpower to start. You just need a slight nudge in the right direction.

    Change will often seem easier if you just break the ice with a small tap first. You can then add more as you feel like it or jump in.

    ^This. It will also give you a tiny measure of success, if only feeling better, or knowing that you're sticking to your plan. Success builds on previous success. It also allows you to build good habits. On days when you don't do so well, you'll be able to look at it as a whole and realize that the entire day wasn't a wreck and there's no reason to quit. You have the ability to do this. You just need a nudge to get started. One thing I did was to commit to logging and ignore the scale. By the time I looked at a scale 6 months later, 20 pounds was gone. If I had been looking at losing 1 pound/week, or whatever, I would have been disappointed. Looking at 20 pounds gone was amazing :)
  • pico6222
    pico6222 Posts: 14 Member
    I used to be obsessive about logging and it became a negative experience for me. I'd freak out about going over my calories and get caught in a shame spiral. If I logged for a couple of weeks obsessively and the scale didn't move I'd restrict calories, nothing would happen, and I'd feel defeated. I was in a negative mindset.

    This time around, I am committed to being gentle and forgiving with myself. Perhaps if you reframe logging as something you do for curiosity and to gain awareness, there will be less pressure. You can try without a calorie goal, just have your goal to be more aware of what you've eaten in a day. After you have made it less scary you can start thinking about calorie adjustments. This worked well for me on breaking a negative cycle.