Do you struggle with self care outside of weightloss?

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cyaneverfat
cyaneverfat Posts: 527 Member
in Motivation and Support
Is it just a depression thing, or a being overweight thing? why is it easier to look after other people? do people with low self care also struggle with low motivation in weightloss and often quit?

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  • jenncornelsen
    jenncornelsen Posts: 969 Member
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    Hmmm this is a difficult question. I personally don't think you can hate yourself into losing weight. You gotta believe you are worth the effort. Some counseling would probably help
  • cyaneverfat
    cyaneverfat Posts: 527 Member
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    Does self hate=laziness? (or maybe lethargy is a better word)
  • jenncornelsen
    jenncornelsen Posts: 969 Member
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    Sorry self hate was a bit strongly worded, but I do think you need to see yourself as someone worthy of helping, ( worth the effort) in order to make lasting change.
  • azulvioleta6
    azulvioleta6 Posts: 4,196 Member
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    No, I do not struggle with self care.

    I don't think that there is a correlation with being overweight, but there certainly is with depression.
  • sammidelvecchio
    sammidelvecchio Posts: 791 Member
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    I have been working on this in therapy. Doing anything for myself seems to be too much, but I take care of my pets and other family/friends very well. Start by setting small goals. My first 2 were to shower every day and to vacuum every day.

    Go from there <3 good luck
  • mom23mangos
    mom23mangos Posts: 3,070 Member
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    I don't think they are related. I exercise every day, I eat somewhat healthy. But I put off Dr/dentist/vision appointments for years.
  • katermari
    katermari Posts: 137 Member
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    i struggle so much with self care. i do not take care of myself. sure i workout every day. but thats about it. i believe it has everything to do with my depression.
  • Ziggyiguana82
    Ziggyiguana82 Posts: 29 Member
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    @cyaneverfat It sounds like depression to me, and to be honest, it really depends on the person. Being overweight doesn't equate to poor hygiene, and depression doesn't always either, but my experience with taking care of disabled and elderly, is that the later usually does. Depression does a lot of things psychologically and physiologically. Hope that helps, and if you feel yourself slipping, please seek help.
  • TatdBirdNerd
    TatdBirdNerd Posts: 10 Member
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    Depression is a wicked beast that robs you of everything... I think it urges us to take care of others so they might never feel as terrible as we feel, but often giving of yourself all the time only depletes yourself further. I've gone to therapy a lot over the years... It's a challenge to see myself as valuable and to yell louder than the voices in the back of my mind that say "you're worthless, why try!". The single-best thing I ever did for myself was finding a therapist. Everything else in life got easier after that!

    Self-improvement DOES NOT require self-loathing.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
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    The self-care things I have struggled with are regular doctor visits and going to hair salons/spas/etc.
    I used to be 150 lb overweight and I have had generalized anxiety disorder since I was a small child, depression since at least my teen years. When it comes to hygiene, calming & relaxation and forms of self-soothing like reading and creating art...I'm golden. But I've long struggled with feeling mildly phobic and embarrassed to go to salons for example. Even just for a quick haircut. When the stylists say something like I have a weird hairline I feel like I am a beast and shouldn't be there. This hasn't gotten any better now that I'm an "average" sized woman FWIW. I am however over my fears of going to the doctor, dentist, etc. Thankfully.
  • billhaderfan1
    billhaderfan1 Posts: 8 Member
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    I struggle with taking care of myself. I think it's related to my anxiety and mental health in general
  • whmscll
    whmscll Posts: 2,254 Member
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    I don’t have input on the OP’s question, but want to say...don’t put off dental care! I did for three years in my early 30s and it led first to peridontal disease, then to a whole lotta cavities and crowns, then two root canals and now to the extraction of two molars in preparation for implants. This last is costing me $10,000, not to mention the “pain and suffering.” Fair warning!
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 32,221 Member
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    When I had responsibilities for caring for others, I learned that a certain amount of self-care was an essential precondition for keeping up my ability to care for others: I needed a certain minimum of sleep, decent nutrition, hydration at least; and some stress reduction.

    Without finding at least that minimum, I would burn out, and not have the wherewithal to give them my best care. This was especially true when the caring responsibility was a long term one (vs. acute care for someone with temporary health issues).

    Metaphorically, I think of it as the "airplane rule": Put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others.

    I'm not sure whether that will make any sense to you, or be of any help, but it was an insight for me that happened after trying to short-circuit self-care too much, for too long.

    That's not part of my life now, but it certainly has been, in the past.
  • MikePTY
    MikePTY Posts: 3,814 Member
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    It certainly could be a depression thing. I don't think it has to do with being overweight.

    Personally I struggle a lot with self care and I'm not depressed and not particularly overweight (less than 15 pounds from a normal BMI after losing over 40). I think it is a combination of being easily distracted/ADD, overworked, and a bit lazy. I work a lot (60+ hours a week), and exercise is the one self care thing I make room for.

    The point of my story above is issues with self care can be pretty personalized to the cause. If you feel like depression might be the cause, talking to someone can certainly be a benefit.

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