Can’t get mad enough to commit

You don't need to be mad, you just need to build good habits, one step at a time.

Step one: log your food, as it is now. Logging has a learning curve, use correct entries in the database, learn to log homemade meals, etc.

Step two: enter your weight loss goals in MFP (pick a reasonable goal and weight loss rate, slow and steady wins the race) and aim for that number. Eat what you like, as long as you hit that number. But if you don't, it's not a big deal: be gentle with yourself, learn from it (reasons why you didn't stick to your goal) and try again the next day.

Burning more calories than you eat is all you need to lose weight. You don't need to be perfect, you don't need to only eat 'good' foods or anything. Just eat less than you burn.

Improving your diet, working on your macro and micro nutrients, being more active,... those things can come afterwards, step by step.

I have felt like you so often. I think th best thing to do in that mindset is to add not take away. So consciously add two extra portions of fresh veg at lunch and at dinner. Add 4 glasses of water during the day. If you have chronic fatigue, add liquid iron, Vit D spray and B-complex vitamins. Add some gentle stretches before you get out of bed and some squats while you clean your teeth. As these become second nature you can add more beneficial changes.

I agree about logging food. It makes you want good choices. I started last week and realised that the food I'd least enjoyed was the processed snacks I grabbed when I was hungry at 4pm. I really resented that they'd taken me over my daily calorie count, so I won't be having them again. Apple, glass of water and hold out until tea-time.

Don't get mad - do it out of love and respect for yourself.

Eat nutritiously to fuel your beautiful body which deserves to run like a well-oiled engine. Eat nutritiously to boost your energy. Eat nutritiously to help you cope with the demands of being a parent to a tiny human who is very dependent on you to meet their needs. You deserve it! You deserve to be at your best.

But also - the season of life you are in with such a young child can be very difficult. Don't let your mind guilt you about this.

You dont have to be mad... just resigned to the fact that you HAVE to track what you eat.

Make it a habit, go for a walk with your baby if you can once a day same time every day. Plan your meals and eat what you planned. Shower. Do a daily meditation or yoga that you can do or tai chi. Listen to positive podcasts or music. Make these a daily thing. Make yourself a top priority just like your baby you need these things to feel better. So you can be the best self you can be. Maybe you are depressed bc of the pains and fatigue, maybe you just don’t care right now about much. That’s ok as long as you try to do at least one of the above things it will get you to that place.

I urge you to rethink. Using anger to get you to lose weight seems like an attempt to beat yourself into submission. Highly unlikely to get you anywhere. Try an approach that stays away from emotions. Emotions come and go.

Agreeing with what others have said- look at your habits. Try to start good ones and sustain them. Best habit to have is an accurate food diary that you keep going through good days and not so good days. It will provide a record of your problem areas. Identify your problems and solve them one at a time. Weight loss is mostly problem solving and persistence.

And also agree with self respect. Although weight loss is mostly a matter of using our heads, it takes a certain amount of heart to keep at it long term. To the extent that it is within your control, you deserve to have the life that you want for yourself. Try to find that place where you’re working for what’s best for you and your family. It’s the right thing to do. It will get you farther than just being angry for being human. Give yourself a break.

The fact that you haven’t found the right path yet is not a reflection on your intelligence. There’s non stop daily disinformation regarding weight loss and fitness put out by people trying to make money. And its hard to deal with. But the weight loss “secret” is hiding in plain sight- its a calorie deficit. Calorie counting works. It has to work, its how our bodies are designed. But it takes time and concentration to learn the process. Start a food diary, get and use a food scale, plan a menu and give it a try. Keep posting here when you encounter problems. You can do it if you try. Really.