Weightloss & Self Esteem - Chicken & Egg

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myfitnesspaljan2020
myfitnesspaljan2020 Posts: 1 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Thoughts?
Does increasing self esteem lead to weight loss or weight loss lead to increasing self esteem and which is the healthiest way?
Should you try and lose weight to increase self esteem or increase self esteem to lose weight or do the two go together to be successful? Or should the two be separate?

Replies

  • 42Amy
    42Amy Posts: 77 Member
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    Excellent question! I've lost weight lots of times. Even changed to a whole new self love mantra. But I still became depressed after injuring myself and started to backslide. This time I started with counseling to try to figure out why I use these coping mechanisms. Instead of focusing on goals like weight loss, exercise or accomplishing X,Y,Z...I am learning to quiet my mind and listen to my body. Sounds hokey, but I'm getting there...losing weight too!
  • Danp
    Danp Posts: 1,561 Member
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    Either, or both, nor neither. It all depends on the person and the situation.

    If overeating or weight gain is a symptom or coping mechanism to deal with trauma or low self esteem then getting your head right and fixing the cause which will have the flow on effect of fixing the symptom.

    If you're feeling low in confidence because of the weight then dropping weight can help you get your mojo back a bit. Or successfully losing weight is a tangible achievement that you can be proud of and can boost your self esteem.

    Often it's both, that the overeating is the result of poor self esteem which causes weight gain which makes things worse. Then I guess it's about breaking the cycle one way or the other.

    Or it's neither and confident, self assured people are overweight for other reasons.

    One thing I'm sure of is that I've never met anyone who tied their happiness to a goal weight suddenly become happy when they got there. Nothing breaks my heart more than hearing someone say "I'll be happy when...." because I know chances are, they wont.
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    edited February 2020
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    I can only speak for myself. And I have no idea where these feelings stem from because I always felt loved as a child, no matter what. I guess it was a combination of strangers who put me down or peers, comparing myself to friends, maybe even the media as I got older. But my self-image and self-esteem have always been tied up with what I looked like. There were times(years in fact) that I avoided the public as much as I could because I hated myself and the way I looked. Even a simple trip to the grocery store would make me feel panicky and judged. It's weird because I'd never look at another overweight person and think those things about them, it was just towards myself. But yeh, I had to work on my health/weight issues way before I felt better about myself. I did try to improve my self esteem first, work through my negative self imagery but it just didn't work for me. :( Whether I never found the right therapist and if it was the way I handled therapy.....I have no idea. :( I've always been one who needed validation to feel good about myself. :( Sad but true. When people constantly put you down one way or another, it's hard to build yourself up and people(whether strangers, media, or others) were always mentioning weight, etc.

    I also believe age and experiences have a lot to do with it all. Being 66, I've (finally*) learned to let some things go, speak up to others more, feel better about myself, and have alleviated so much stress in my life. I no longer feel beaten down by life like I used to. So for me anyways, losing weight first helped with my self-esteem, along with maturity, less stress, and better health.
  • Lietchi
    Lietchi Posts: 6,111 Member
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    I've found that weight loss has increased my self esteem. Not just because I feel better in my skin weighing less, but mostly because I've gotten fitter (regular exercise) and because I've realised that I have more self discipline than I thought (regular exercise and respecting my calorie goal).

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