Hot Mess Express Coming Through!

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At 37 years of age and weighing in at 252 lbs., I am a solid contender for what obesity in America looks like. I hope to use the MyFitnessPal app to help me make the dietary lifestyle changes needed to achieve my weight loss goals. Realistically speaking, those goals look like the following:

•Being able to lean forward in the bathtub to shave my legs without the risk of passing out due to holding my breath when one of my multiple fat rolls cuts off my air supply. 

•Being able to look in the mirror and see that my fat rolls are no longer larger than my tits. 

•Being able to jog, and I use that term loosely, without my thighs slapping and making music of their own accord as we Fred Flintstone our way down the street when I work out.

•Being able to have more lap space so that my friend's small dog doesn't bounce off my belly and then land back on the floor, looking shell shocked from my involuntary deflection of her affections, when she tries to jump into my lap for some cuddles. 

•Last but not least, I would like to be taken seriously, or not be viewed as a waste of time when I go to a doctor's appointment to seek treatment for a legitimate physical ailment. 

Anyway, I have other goals and objectives too, but I plan to keep the really important stuff close to my chest for now; some hopes & dreams are just too personal to speak about out loud... Well, that was me in a nutshell! Time to get started on this next journey towards self-improvement. 

Choo, Choo people! Here I come.

Replies

  • MidlifeCrisisFitness
    MidlifeCrisisFitness Posts: 1,106 Member
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    Choo Choo is a perfect moto! Take it Slow and Steady and don't let anything stop you. Just like a steam train. Unstoppable.
  • PrimaryAdjunctOfUnimatrix1010
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    You can do this!!!
  • Megan_smartiepants1970
    Megan_smartiepants1970 Posts: 41,535 Member
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    Welcome to MFP .... I have been here off and on since 2009...I had a bad habit of giving up on myself when things got tough and deleting my accounts..... I re started my journey again on Jan 1st of this year at 269...I have lost 23 lbs so far....Feel free to add me if you want a cheerleader while you are on your journey ...wishing you the very best ....You got this as long as you don't give up :)
  • Lori_Butierries
    Lori_Butierries Posts: 4 Member
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    Hi Megan,

    I’m totally down for having a personal cheerleader! Knowing that someone else can see what I am doing would definitely help to keep my train on the right tracks. Thanks for the offer! Question though, how do I “add” you?
  • Chris_J99
    Chris_J99 Posts: 175 Member
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    Welcome to the MFP community!
    There’s lots of lovely people here who will encourage and motivate you.
    You got this!
    😁💪🏼🎉
  • Evette7
    Evette7 Posts: 156 Member
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    Basically - same. Just over it and ready. Sent you a request!
  • mikedee_nyc
    mikedee_nyc Posts: 198 Member
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    No hot messes here. You got this and we’re all here to help motivate. Welcome to MFP.
  • rabblescum
    rabblescum Posts: 78 Member
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    •Last but not least, I would like to be taken seriously, or not be viewed as a waste of time when I go to a doctor's appointment to seek treatment for a legitimate physical ailment. 

    Admirable goals as a whole but this ☝️ seriously, I am with you. I recommend C25K app for slow motion jogging. My neighborhood kids approve and find much amusement with my spectical of slower than walk speed "running".
  • dianastepheny
    dianastepheny Posts: 650 Member
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    Hi! Love your intro! Frank, honest, totally relatable on every comment, and handled with a sense of humor ( definitely made me chuckle.... especially since one of my first goals is to have my boobs stick out farther than my belly). I need to get rid of 100 pounds. I'm down 25 so far.