Getting Asked Out

jamesdelong
jamesdelong Posts: 177 Member
edited October 2 in Chit-Chat
I'm usually the one doing it but as of late I've been noticing that more and more females are the ones doing the asking out.
I like that!

I'm not sure if it's my age or the different venues I've been going to or even if it's the fact I feel I have more confident now and maybe that's showing but either way I'm digging it.

Females - Do you feel okay asking a guy out too or would you rather them come to you?

Males - Do you have any problems with a straight forward person?

Curious minds like to know (me)
I still believe in chivalry and will be the one asking but I enjoy seeing how times change and that it works both ways.

Replies

  • voluptas63
    voluptas63 Posts: 602 Member
    I don't mind doing the asking, but it's always nice to be wanted by someone:)

    In a non-creepy, I don't want to wear your skin kind of way.
  • Photoology
    Photoology Posts: 121 Member
    I don't mind asking a guy out or even telling my boyfriend "hey want to go on a date" and I pay since I did the asking. I do have friends, who are my age, who all believe the guy who should do the asking and the paying but it all depends, in my opinion, on how shy a person is. If a guy is shy, then perhaps a female needs to take "charge."

    Do I believe one is better or more acceptable, nope. Kindness should work both ways and if you like someone, why not?
  • catshark209
    catshark209 Posts: 1,133 Member
    I don't like pursuing men. I'm shy I guess lol but with my bf now, I texted him outta the blue. Kinda weird lol.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    It wouldn`t matter to me but the guy still needs to treat her right.
    Just because she asked doesn`t mean it is a green light to anything and if he likes her should be willing to be the one to ask for a second date.
  • CoachMaritova
    CoachMaritova Posts: 409 Member
    WEIRD... I just asked that question.... are you stalking me?? ;)
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    I prefer the that the guy does it but I wish I could get over my fear of rejection so I would have the cajones to do it myself. I hate to think that guys don't act on things because they may not know how interested I really am.
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    I'm old school. I like being asked out. I feel strange being the one to initiate, as if I'm taking his job away or something. I know times are changing, but I guess I don't always change with the times.... :blushing:
  • chocolateandvodka
    chocolateandvodka Posts: 1,850 Member
    i'll strike up a conversation with anyone, so it's pretty usual for me to initiate contact whether in person or however... but... i like to wait for the guy to ask unless there just happens to be something amazing happening that i know they'll enjoy.

    for example: i once met a guy at a bar while listening to a local cover band. we talked about music interests and what not, and when another band was coming through that i already knew, i mentioned it to him. that's like the only sort of situation where i'm ok with asking.
  • _beachgirl_
    _beachgirl_ Posts: 3,865 Member
    I would much more prefer a guy ask me out first, after that I would have no problem calling him to set up our next date!
  • Melmade
    Melmade Posts: 349 Member
    I prefer direct--tactful, honest. Either sex.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    I don't mind doing the asking, but it's always nice to be wanted by someone:)

    In a non-creepy, I don't want to wear your skin kind of way.

    ditto.
  • sunkisses
    sunkisses Posts: 2,365 Member
    I prefer to be asked.
  • ncgatorfan
    ncgatorfan Posts: 517
    I'm a traditional sort and old fashioned, I guess. I like to be pursued instead of me asking.
  • nerdyandilikeit
    nerdyandilikeit Posts: 2,185 Member
    I prefer the that the guy does it but I wish I could get over my fear of rejection so I would have the cajones to do it myself. I hate to think that guys don't act on things because they may not know how interested I really am.

    This. I'm SO shy around guys.
  • clew313
    clew313 Posts: 12
    My philosophy is the early bird gets the worm. If I see a man I'm interested in I will ask you know the standard questions "Are you married etc etc" But I'm not afraid to ask a guy out, plus I think men think you're more confident about yourself
  • adjones5
    adjones5 Posts: 938 Member
    If its someone I don't plan on having a long term relationship with I don't mind asking them out but if were in it for the long haul then I prefer a man who has the guts to ask me
  • T_R_A_V
    T_R_A_V Posts: 1,629 Member
    I wont lie....it makes my day if a woman approaches me
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    I wont lie....it makes my day if a woman approaches me

    I think that's the ticket... Being asked is always awesome.
  • epj78
    epj78 Posts: 643 Member
    All my guy friends tell me that they like it when women approach them.

    However, I'm still old fashion and hate doing the approaching. In fact, I won't do it. I'll do the subtle signs - like eye contact - that say - "hey I wouldn't mind being approached" - but I won't approach. They try and try to convince me - but it's something I'm just not comfortable doing.
  • h3h8m3
    h3h8m3 Posts: 455 Member
    I believe that everyone, of both genders, would prefer to be asked. Asking someone out requires taking risk. And being asked is an affirmation that the other person likes you. Always better to be asked.

    That said, in the big game of life the guys have most of the breaks. So the fact that we have the minor inconvenience of having to ask out the women more often isn't all that big a deal. Just suck it up and it's not that bad.
  • Krull_the_WarriorKing
    Krull_the_WarriorKing Posts: 650 Member
    Getting asked out was pretty common when I was younger. But not so much anymore.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    I so much prefer being the one asked! I'm usually too shy to do the asking. But if I'm interested, I do a lot of flirting, make eye contact, try to show that I won't say no if the guy asks, so hopefully, he doesn't feel intimidated.

    Well, that's what I did when I was single, anyway. lol I don't do it now that I live with someone.
  • ohwhataday
    ohwhataday Posts: 1,398 Member
    I have asked a few guys if I liked them enough and they just didn't get it. My husband was one of them. But I'm guessing it's because he thought I was dating the dude I was with when I met him.

    Will never forget that.
  • SunLovin1
    SunLovin1 Posts: 682 Member
    I never ask a guy out. Ever. But I'm 46 and asking a guy out just wasn't done, back in the day. I'm just one of those women that would rather have the whole traditional pursuit thing going on. It appeals to my sense of romance. :heart:

    I love the fact that women today feel empowered to do it if they want to, though. I can see how guys would love it!
  • AimingHighWeighingLow
    AimingHighWeighingLow Posts: 192 Member
    Pft! If I want something....I go for it! Traditional or not, I would rather know if someone was interested by asking them than sit there and wonder if the feelings were returned. If they are not interested I can move on. (I pursued my husband, he told me outright that he would never of asked me out because he thought I was out of his league!! If I didn't have the bottle then we wouldn't be together - I must add I was 7stone 7lb when we got together!!lol)
  • kevinlynch3
    kevinlynch3 Posts: 287 Member
    Most women who are interested drop enough hints through either flirting or hinting about hanging out (offering their number) that asking them out is an inevitable next step. I enjoy getting asked out when it happens but the norm for me has been that a girl will take my phone and put her number in it rather than ask me out directly.

    I prefer asking the girl out.
  • tomomatic
    tomomatic Posts: 1,794 Member
    I don't mind getting asked. But I'm probably gonna say no since I'm married.
  • juliecat1
    juliecat1 Posts: 3,450 Member
    Id prefer to be asked out. But no problem asking for a second date, etc....
  • writtenINthestars
    writtenINthestars Posts: 1,933 Member
    Well I don't ask guys out anymore seeing as I'm married but I will say that before DH, I asked out guys just as often as they asked out me. Never once did I get a strange look or anything. In fact, I was told that it showed a high level of confidence and the guy liked it. I don't really have a preference either way, but I do enjoy being asked out as well :)
  • tomomatic
    tomomatic Posts: 1,794 Member
    Now that I think about it, I've been asked out by dudes on the train and a bookstore. At first, I was unnerved, but then I realized that it meant that MFP is working. My wife laughed. And I said no.
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